Girls Talking Life

On the show today, I'm talking with Pam Baily. Pam is a speaker, mentor and friend, challenging women to lead Christ-centered lives full of purpose and joy. Last year she launched her first online discipleship group known as Soul Sisters where she creates an environment for women to study God's word, pray for one another, and cheer each other along in their walk with Christ. Pam is also the host of the new Soul Sisters podcast.

Pam and I are talking about what it means to be a soul sister and how these special girlfriends help us experience joy. Pam shares ways we can be good sisters to each other – refrain from gossip, encourage in love, lay down your life, and pray for them – sounds easy enough, right? The truth is we all fall short some of the time, but Pam unpacks what these mean for us in our actual lives and small things we can do to stay on track in our relationships.

We also discuss things, other than her soul sisters, Pam has found to increase the joy in her life. I can't put my finger on what it is that I love so much about Pam, but my guess is that it's God's love emanating from her. Jump into our conversation and I'm sure you'll feel it too!

1 Samuel 18

Soul Sisters with Pam Bailey Podcast

Soul Sisters on YouTube

Discipleship Groups

ESV Study Bible

Allen Parr YouTube Channel

Michel Design Works – Beach Collection

J. Crew Flip Flops

Arbonne Chocolate Protein Shake

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We're wrapping up our series on parenting and family culture today. I'm joined by Amanda Bacon. Amanda lives in North Carolina with her husband, Jeremy, and their eight children. She's on staff at Proverbs 31 Ministries on Lysa TerKeurst's team and loves encouraging women with biblical truth and authenticity. Amanda is the co-host of All the Mom Things podcast, host of At Night podcast, and the co-author of Shiny Things: Mothering on Purpose in a World of Distractions.

In order to know what's distracting us, we need to know what our priorities are. Amanda and I talk about how naming what's important to us isn't the hard part. It's keeping what's most important to us first. Amanda points us to the perfect example. She says, "[Jesus] displays priorities and how to live our top priority with it at the top, all through scripture."

Amanda and I chat about some of the distractions in our lives and how a lot of times we use distractions as an escape when things are hard. To combat this, a question Amanda will ask is, "is right now the right time?" And because our brains are full managing all of the things for our families, we might need timers and reminders to keep us on track.

As much as we love our children, sometimes they are the distraction. Amanda says communication with our kids is really big when we need to get work done, but we also have to make sure we aren't squandering our time.

Since summer is upon us and mothering on purpose is Amanda's heart, we wrap up by talking about things we can do to have a successful summer with our most important people.

Shiny Things: Mothering on Purpose in a World of Distractions

All the Mom Things Podcast

At Night Podcast

Fresh Salsa

Nutpods Creamer

The Dearly Beloved

Bare Marriage Podcast

The Durrells in Corfu

Instagram

A five-day experience to plan, prep and gather with your girlfriends.

The Gathering Project begins on June 14th.

You'll get:

• 5 days of coaching videos
• a 12-page workbook – the Girls Gathering Guide
• GTL conversation cards
• access to a private FB group for real-time interaction with me and other group members for support, ideas and encouragement.

My mission is to help you gather, have conversations, create meaningful connections, and build lasting friendships.

We're jumping back into our series on parenting and family culture today while continuing to talk about mental health. If you missed you the last episode, you definitely want to go back and hear my conversation with Carla Arges on Living Victoriously with Mental Illness. Today I'm joined by mental health professional, Michelle Nietert, and she and I are talking about making sure we're healthy ourselves and then evaluating our kids' mental health.

Michelle and I talk about how important it is to check in with yourself. She tells us to check on our spiritual practice, to check on our emotions, our sleep, our nutrition and our movement. Michelle gives ideas for how we can be sure we're centering ourselves on God so we are in a good mindset. She says, "emotions need to be on the bus, but they don't need to be driving the bus…we want to make sure God is driving our bus."

Next, it's time to check in with our kids, have conversations and evaluate their mental health. Michelle says we want to make sure our kids are hopeful about the future, that they're managing their nutrition and sleep well, and that they are able to process negative emotions when they experience them. She shares questions we can ask our kids to gauge how they're doing in these areas. Michelle says if they're not doing well or if we're just not sure, it's time to ask for help from a professional. She also encourages us to celebrate when things are good!

Michelle Nietert, LPC-S is an author, speaker, and Clinical Director of Community Counseling Associates in Dallas, TX. She's a sought-after leader by mental health professionals, churches, and school districts, co-author of Loved & Cherished, a devotional for tween girls and is also co-host of the Raising Brave Beauties podcast, which will be re-launching in May as Raising Mentally Healthy Kids.

Pray Every Day Podcast with Mary DeMuth

Brendon Burchard – Doorways

The Mother and Son Prayer Journal by Christie Thomas

Loved & Cherished: 100 Devotions for Girls by Lynn Cowell and Nichelle Nietert

The Passion Ministries – Lou Giglio

Dr. Tim Elmore

Screen Kids by Arlene Pellicane

Marleylily Monogramming

Atomic Habits by James Clear

Scent Bird

Buff City Soap Bath Bombs

The Naturally Nourish Podcast

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A five-day experience to plan, prep and gather with your girlfriends.

The Gathering Project begins on June 14th.

You'll get:

• 5 days of coaching videos
• a 12-page workbook – the Girls Gathering Guide
• GTL conversation cards
• access to a private FB group for real-time interaction with me and other group members for support, ideas and encouragement.

My mission is to help you gather, have conversations, create meaningful connections, and build lasting friendships.

Carla Arges is on the show today sharing her story and her encouragement for those living with mental illness. She also explains what it's like to live with mental illness on a daily basis for those of us who don't know. Carla has so much insight and wisdom straight from God's Word on this subject. She clears up misconceptions about mental illness as Christians and gives practical guidance for those wanting to love someone well who is struggling in this way.

Carla tells us that early on she wanted to handle her struggles on her own, but once she became a mother she knew she didn't want to repeat the cycle of her childhood with her son, which is what led her to seek help. Carla says "making that shift from being a victim of my circumstances to having ownership over my life was a huge turning point."

Carla shares some low points in her journey and how God showed her that He created her for MORE. He gently walked her through healing and restoration slowly, one area at a time. Carla tells us that while she still struggles with identity, a way she has combated those feelings is by creating affirmations directly from scripture to remind her of the truth of who she is in Christ.

Carla explains what it's like to live her mental illness and how she has learned to utilize the tools available to her. She says that by controlling the things you can control — like how much sleep you get, the foods you eat and how much you move your body — you can "live a victorious life within your illness."

Carla is an entrepreneur, author, mom, wife and mental health advocate. She is the founder of Affirming Truths, a platform to help women affirm their identity in Christ. Her mission is to help women gain confidence in who they are so that they can walk more boldly in the purpose God has over their life.

Affirming Truths

Kairos Journal

Who You Say I Am Affirmation Cards

Happy Light

Morning Coffee Made by her Husband

Scopa Italian Card Game

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Did you know that there's a Girls Talking Life community group on FB? It's an extension of the podcast where we can connect and continue to grow even when we can't be with our girlfriends. If you are looking for community, if you want join in the conversation after the show and encourage others as we all grow in our faith, jump in to this group! I'd love to see you there!

Did you know you can help save childhood, mama?

We are continuing our series on parenting and family culture today with Jessica Smartt. She reminds us how important our jobs as moms really are. Even when it doesn't feel important, we have gifts we can give our kids that will shape who they become. Jessica says, "we need to be gracious with ourselves, but that doesn't mean we don't work on the things that are worth doing." And parenting our children well is one of those things!

Jessica and I chat about her book, Let them Be Kids. We dive into why and how we can give our kids the gifts of adventure, boredom and more. Jessica says our kids are wired to need adventure and we can "either give it to them in a healthy way, or they're going to want to go find it on their own, and the world offers them tons of options."

We talk about why they need the mental white space of boredom too. Jessica gives us permission to "back the bus up" on decisions we've already made about technology. She also shares about grit, work ethic and lessons learned from her kids' pet sitting business.

Jessica is a homeschooling mom of three who loves biking, breakfast food, and being the one in charge of a big fun event. She is the author of Memory-Making Mom and Let Them Be Kids.

Memory Making Mom

Let Them Be Kids

Sex, Jesus and the Conversations the Church Forgot by Mo Isom

Allowance Chore System

Summer Planning Guide

Sunless Tanner

Trader Joe's Vegetable Fried Rice

Family Friendly TV Shows

World of Where

Art Hub for Kids

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Did you know that there's a Girls Talking Life community group on FB? It's an extension of the podcast where we can connect and continue to grow even when we can't be with our girlfriends. If you are looking for community, if you want join in the conversation after the show and encourage others as we all grow in our faith, jump in to this group! I'd love to see you there!

What is your family's culture? Do you know you have one whether you've thought about it or not?

Kimberly Amici joins me today to begin our series on parenting and family culture. She and I talk about what family culture is and how to go about defining it for your family. Kimberly says "when you have a culture in your home where you've identified your values and you know what you want to be known for…it helps you make decisions." Prevent decision fatigue by having a plan in place where you've decided ahead of time!

We chat about getting our kids involved and letting them take ownership which allows our kids to feel a sense of belonging and empowerment. We also talk about creating a culture that points our kids to Jesus. Kimberly says it's "deciding what it is that's important to you and then taking small steps over time to get there."

Kimberly has fantastic encouragement for young moms who are in the trenches and for mamas of older kids who might think it's too late to be intentional with the direction your family is headed.

Kimberly is known for her creativity, strong faith, and commitment to living life with purpose and passion. She is an entrepreneur, designer, podcast producer, and family culture coach. She lives with her husband Carl and their three teenagers in the NYC suburbs.

Read It Pray It Cards

Build Your Best Family Course

Build Your Best Family Podcast

Bingeing Alias

Music

Hydroflask

Becoming Elisabeth Elliot by Ellen Vaughn

Essential Oils

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CONNECT WITH GIRLS TALKING LIFE

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Heather Creekmore joins me to talk about body image, comparison and the never-ending chase of better.

We talk about Heather's new book, The Burden of Better, and how there is no end to chasing better. Better is a moving target that changes depending on who you're looking at or the trend of the day. She says the only answer to our constant discontentment is Jesus.

Heather and I chat about how comparison affects our friendships. She says when we compare ourselves to other women, our potential friends, and find them seemingly "better" than us in a certain area, our brains process it as rejection. Heather says, "we cannot be loving others, especially our friends as we're called to love them, if we are comparing ourselves with them, it's just not possible."

Whether we're comparing our bodies, or our works, or our gifts, Heather shares how grace and gratitude are tools God's given us to effectively fight comparison and end the race for better. She say's "once you truly understand God's grace, it allows you to be grateful and have gratitude at just a completely different level. It takes it from a head game to a heart game, and that's when it starts to really change the way you believe."

Heather writes and speaks hope to thousands of women each week inspiring them to stop comparing and start living. Her first book Compared to Who? encourages women to uncover the spiritual root of body image issues and find freedom. Her new release, The Burden of Better, offers women a journey into the depths of God's grace to find a way off the treadmill of constant comparison. Heather and her fighter-pilot-turned-pastor husband, Eric have four children and live in Austin, Texas.

The Burden of Better

Compared to Who?

Colossians 3:12-14 Message Version – Be content with second place.

Dr. Axe's Salted Carmel Bone Broth

Nicky Gumbel One-year Bible Reading Plan

Say I Won't by Mercy Me

The Cosby Show

Colossians 3:12

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CONNECT WITH GIRLS TALKING LIFE

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Melanie Dale joins me for a fabulous conversation about Mom Friends; how we make them, why we need them and how it helps our kids.

Melanie tells us that it's important for us to have other mom friends so we can model healthy relationships for our kids and so we realize that we're not alone in the parenting challenges we face. She says, "my mom friends actually make me a better parent."

Melanie walks us through the bases for mom friends, the four phases our relationships may go through from an acquaintance you make small talk with at soccer practice, to someone you invite for a night out without the kids.

Melanie shares her "wow, that's so awesome" approach for when another mom gives us the lowdown on her strong opinion of something we might not agree with. She says it allows the "relationship to breathe and to develop trust." She tells us to lighten up about different parenting choices.

And finally we talk about teaching our kids to be good friends. Melanie says "as my kids are going through relationship challenges and dealing with other friends" she tries "to coach from the sidelines and not get on the field."

Melanie is the author of four books, including Calm the H*ck Down: How to Let Go and Lighten Up about Parenting. She's a staff writer for Coffee+Crumbs, hosts the podcast Lighten Up with Melanie Dale, and has contributed writing to everything from the (in)courage Devotional Bible to Shudder's Creepshow. She lives in the Atlanta area with her husband of twenty years and their three kids from three different continents.

Calm the H*ck Down: How to Let Go and Lighten Up About Parenting

Women Are Scary: The Total Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends

20 Ideas for Zoom Calls BESIDES talking about Coronavirus

Vampire Teeth Jammies

Doc Martins

Abel Perfume

Harney and Sons Cinnamon Tea

Burt's Bees Lip Shimmer

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A five-day experience to plan, prep and gather with your girlfriends.

The Gathering Project begins on March 15th. Register today at girlstalkinglife.com/thegatheringproject.

Use code GTL50 for 50% off your registration.

My mission is to help you gather, have conversations, create meaningful connections, and build lasting friendships.

What does good conversation look like? How do you create a safe space for vulnerability? What does it mean to really connect?

Continuing our series on cultivating community, creating meaningful connections and building lasting friendships, Brandy Wallner joins me from Southern California to chat about A Good Conversation Dinner, a table ministry designed to help women connect across all perceived boundaries and as fellow image bearers of God.

Brandy has a love for eliciting deep conversation, and to get the depth you need vulnerability, but that doesn't happen automatically. She says we can create a "safe-to-be-vulnerable environment" by going first. Brandy also shares some of her guidelines for a good conversation.

Brandy and I talk about how important listening can be. She encourages listening without interruption as to not side-track the conversation. Her dinners give everyone a chance to share so there's no pressure to jump in to make your voice heard. Brandy tells us that connection happens when we listen for our commonalities and our differences.

For anyone who might be apprehensive to host, Brandy says it doesn't need to be fancy. Ordering in or potluck are just fine! We also talk about being introverts and how that impacts our conversation. Brandy tells us that having intentional questions helps move us past draining small talk and produces life-giving conversations.

Brandy Wallner is a freelance content writer, ghost writer, and current Community Writer on the hope*writer team. She is passionate about writing words and questions that help people connect with God, themselves, and their people. She is the founder of A Good Conversation Dinner, a table ministry designed to help women connect across all perceived boundaries and as fellow image bearers of God.

hope*writers

A Good Conversation Dinner

For 30% off card sets through March 1st, use code: GTL

Trader Joe's Dark Chocolate Pistachio Toffee Squares

Novex Collagen Infusion Leave-in Conditioner

A Great Cup of Coffee

The Bachelor/The Bachelorette

Maverick City Worship

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Today we're continuing our series on cultivating community, creating meaningful connections and building lasting friendships, and I'm chatting with Noelle Rhodes, host of the Friending show.

Noelle starts by sharing her own personal struggle with friendship. When she moved back to the States, after being a missionary in Northern Ireland for several years, most of her friends had moved on. She was lonely and was having a hard time making new friends. That low point started her journey to researching and talking about female friendships.

Noelle describes how relationships affect us and says "loneliness is the worst poison for the mind, and friendship is as valuable as daily exercise." We chat about what to do if you feel like friend groups have already been established and you're on the outside. Noelle tells us to invite ourselves in…and bring food!

She explains the difference between cliques and groups, and how to know if you're in a toxic relationship. We also talk about having a "social spark" with someone and how to invite them into a deeper friendship. Noelle says "time is that currency of trust and trust is what makes space for vulnerability, and then vulnerability leads to depth in friendships."

Noelle is a pastor, podcaster and playwright. She has studied female friendship for the last 4 years and hosts the podcast, Friending – a show that helps women have life-giving friendship no matter what season of life they are in. She resides in New Jersey with her wild children, husband of 18 years and dog with three working legs.

Friending Podcast

Aldi Candles – First Snow

Constant Comment Tea

The Queen's Gambit

Mrs. Meyers Peppermint All Purpose Cleaner

Gray Walmart Sweatpants!

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