Now, and this is interesting, lots of people seemed to really relate to what I was saying. People were tweeting or going on LinkedIn and commenting what they though about this. However, some people raised the point that the train stations were not really at fault or that there were many other issues that needed to be addressed. One individual contacted me directly and said that “There are better things to spend money on than those who want to run around for the local gangs”. I asked that individual if he felt that the savings that were made were worth the cost of a child’s life. He did not reply.

I sat outside his office until 3. From first lesson to 3. My mum got there at 3:15. It was clear she had just woken up. I was so angry at her because I thought she looked messy and the kids would say stuff about her. Again. I didn’t even listen to what all the adults were saying. The usual “Kendra is out of control” I had to listen to many times. Then the atmosphere in the room changed. I could feel it. I started to tune back into the room.

Funny…she will never know the things that have been done to protect her. The fights that have been taking place to keep her safe. The stand-up rows I have had with people much senior than me. The tears that have been shed for her.

The following conversation went like this…

Baby seagull walks closer. J takes a piece of his bread and chucks it on the train line. The baby seagull jumps down onto the line to get it.

D: “Do you want it to get a shock?”

J: “Let it get hit by a train init, no one cares about dem birds”

D: “Like us, they are flying rats and we are hood rats” (This is clearly a joke but neither boy smile or laugh)

Last day of school is when children and young people know they have to say something if they are going to say anything because the next 6-7 weeks they will be away from people that may protect them. The people that see them often and notice when things may not be going well.

So, after you have read this, take a moment of silence for us on the front line on the last day of school.

They bring her mum back in. She is not crying and looks ok. She hugs her daughter and kisses her head. She says she is sorry, and the girl knows that he sorry is not for what has happed today but for a lot of things.

I’m telling you this because there is a proven link between girls witnessing this kind of violence at an early age and then their gradual transition into gangs and exploitation. I would say about 80% of the girls I support will speak of this type of violence being prevalent in their early years.

He is on my bed. The only teddy I have had on my bed for years. I have also remembered why I have hated teddies on beds for years. And that’s where he will stay. No longer wiping up the tears of a broken child or drowning out the sound of abuse. Just here…chillin…currently being sat on by my cat. He is a bit raggedy. A bit broken. He no longer plays music the same way. But he is still here.

Just like me.

Time to meet my other panel speaker. Zoe. The amazing Zoe from REIGN. When I am introduced to Zoe she is sensory overload and not coping well at all. We sit together and try to calm this. Fiona ends up with a wet patch on her bum (She swears she didn’t wet herself….) and Zoe is ready to do this...suddenly feel like I am not ready..not one little bit.

On the 4th, she wouldn’t stop crying. I had tried everything. Creams, hot water bottle, tablets. Then she said she couldn’t get up for the toilet. My mum was a very private lady and I knew that she must be unwell to say this. So, I called an ambulance. I stayed with the boys as they were still little, and I called the hospital throughout the night. The next morning, the 5th, the hospital called and said that she was having scans and tests, and could I come at 10. I took My oldest son and my then boss to the hospital. I was told that they could not find anything major wrong. I saw mum and went home to finish decorating the boys room, told mum I would be back at 6.