Glorious Ordinary Podcast

My first narrated essay with a soundtrack. I started with the sound of my grandson breathing as he slept on my chest and folded in the story of life happening around us.

Besides being a passionate essayist and audio producer I am:

*A poet & writer working on a memoir and a YA novel based on a Celtic myth. *A Life & Executive Coach for people living with type 1 diabetes. *A teacher on Insight Timer. https://insighttimer.com/valeriespain

If you found this post meaningful, you can drop a contribution here: buymeacoffee.com/valeriespan.

Regarding AI: I do not use it in any part of my writing or audio editing process: from conceiving and developing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing /narrating the final essay. Everything, from beginning to end, is the work of this human.

The thing that has me by the throat right now is how to live honestly in a time of cruelty and peril.

I use Caroline Forche’s memoir What You Have Heard is True, as a springboard to reflect on generosity in the midst of trauma and our responsibility as "white" people to witness, and how, while I was directing programs focused on health equity and co-facilitating white antiracist affinity groups, people of color befriended and mentored me in the ways of the world far beyond my experience.

Early on Forche protested she had no power.

“…[poets] are seen as bohemians, romantics or crazy. Among the poets I admire, there is one who waved goodbye before jumping from a bridge, another who put on a fur coat and gassed herself in the garage…. We have no credibility.”

Unfazed, Leonel Gomez said: Well, you have to change that.

Yes.

We have to change that.

Besides being a passionate essayist, writer and poet I am: *A teacher on Insight Timer. https://insighttimer.com/valeriespain *Certified Mindfulness Mentor

If you don’t want to commit to a subscription but found this post meaningful, you can drop a contribution here: buymeacoffee.com/valeriespan.

Regarding AI: I do not use AI in any part of my writing and audio editing process: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing/narrating the final essay, everything is the work of one human who also loves and freely uses the em dash.

Sources

Mother Jones interview with Carolyn Forche https://www.motherjones.com/media/2019/03/carolyn-forche-memoir-venezuela/

“The Colonel” https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/49862/the-colonel Interview with Leonel Gómez Vides https://dc.suffolk.edu/moh/21/

Any creative work requires space and time to mentally meander, wantonly wander, desultorily daydream. This essay attempts to explain my writing process and the changes needed to sustain it.

Writing essays consistently on Substack since 2023 has made me a better writer, and it has particularly helped me understand my writing process. Some writers outline and plan everything before they write—I figure out what I want or need to write by writing.

The ability to see creative trueness has been with me since childhood. It’s an elliptical knowing; an out-of-the-corner-of-the-eye knowing; a being still and letting it approach you knowing. It’s not limited to the arts. It requires fallow time for thoughts to percolate, ferment or whatever else they do deep inside and out of sight.

So moving forward, I will take time off as needed. The next essay will arrive in your mailbox (or in your RSS feed) September 30th and pick up the bi-weekly rhythm from that date.

“Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion.” – Franz Kafka

Besides being a passionate essayist I am: *A poet and writer. I’m working on a memoir and a YA novel based on a Celtic myth. *A teacher on Insight Timer. https://insighttimer.com/valeriespain *Certified Mindfulness Mentor

If you can't afford a subscription but found this post meaningful, you can drop a contribution here: buymeacoffee.com/valeriespan.

Regarding AI: I do not use AI in any part of my writing process: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing the final essay. All the imagining, writing and editing is the work of one human who loves and freely uses the em dash.

I’m in a phase, a turning point, a something… where the consequences of many life choices are converging, and old issues clamor to be acknowledged. Relationships are the most clamorous of all particularly the relationship I had with my mother.

I acknowledged the anniversary of her death last week, but surprise(!) we are still in conversation and this postmortem connection has proved to be the most instructive of all.

Nothing special is a Buddhist concept that says being ordinary is enough. No need to be special. Everything we need to learn is happening right now. And it’s pretty amazing.

"As my first teacher, Munindraji, would say, the thought of your mother is not your mother. It’s a thought. A thought of anything is not the thing, it’s a thought. So when we can relate to whatever emotional turmoil might be happening and the thoughts associated with them [by saying to ourselves], “Yeah, this is just a thought in the moment,” it gives us access to relating to it in a different way." ~Joseph Goldstein

Besides being a passionate writer and narrator of this bi-weekly newsletter I am: *An essay writer and poet. *A teacher on Insight Timer. https://insighttimer.com/valeriespain, and a Certified Mindfulness Mentor.

If you don’t want to commit to a subscription but found this post meaningful, you can drop a contribution here: buymeacoffee.com/valeriespan.

Regarding AI: I do not use it in any part of my writing process: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing the final essay. All the imagining, writing and editing is the work of one human. We don’t need more content. We need heart-centered, human content.

Two weeks ago I spent a day with my five year old grandson in Gloucester, MA. We had an adventure and he gave me some advice about making choices though he didn't know it.

To be free in the world, you must be free of the world. Or your past decides for you and your future. ~Sri Nisargardatta

Glorious Ordinary is a reader-supported publication on Substack and you can read this essay there, and become a free or paid subscriber.

Valerie's Bio

*Writer, essayist and poet. *Teacher on Insight Timer. *Life coach helping folks living with type 1 diabetes to nurture their mental, emotional and spiritual health. I’ve lived with T1D for 30+ years. Read The Type 1 Diabetes Dilemma. Schedule a free Discovery Session. *To learn even more, go to LinkedIn. **My identities: older, white, cisgender woman of European immigrant descent; a mother of sons, a grandmother, daughter, sister, friend, advocate for social justice and for this beloved, animate earth.

This essay is about coercive control and domestic violence, about autonomy and who gets to decide how we use our time.

AI: I do not use it in any part of my creative process: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing and recording final essays or podcasts. Everything you listen to and read—including the em dashes—is the work of one human.

I am a writer, poet, life coach and someone who has lived with type 1 diabetes for 30+ years. I’m launching a new newsletter this month, Type 1 Diabetes Dilemma. Stay tuned! I’m also refocusing my coaching niche to work with people living with type 1.

Glorious Ordinary is reader-supported Substack newsletter. If you like what you hear, please go here: https://valeriespain.substack.com/

And become a free or paid subscriber!

A Romance of Apples

It’s unlikely Eve plucked an apple from the Tree of Knowledge since up until the 17th c. the word “apple” was a generic term for all unknown, i.e. foreign, fruit, excluding berries, though it did include nuts.

What fills out heads

Eve disgraced herself when she ate from the Tree despite God clearly saying absolutely not! but even as a child in Catholic school I could not condemn her.

To name out of all paradise the one thing denied her, so Eve would spend those first days walking around with apple apple filling hours in her head- ~from "Original Sin" a poem by Lucia Perillo

How could she think of anything but apples after that?

Regarding AI: I do not use it in any part of my creative process: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing and recording the final essay, everything you read and listen to is the work of one human.

* I’m a writer, poet, life coach and someone who’s lived with type 1 diabetes for 30+ years. I’m focusing my coaching niche to work with people living with type 1. I’m “in the gap,” someone who always does “fine” clinically, but gets little emotional support (from the medical profession) re how to navigate daily life with a chronic condition. If that sounds like you, we might be a good fit. You don’t have to do it alone.

*I’m excited to launch a new newsletter this month, Type 1 Diabetes Dilemma, about my my journey and ongoing insights.

Right now, the activities I embrace without hesitation are playing with children and holding babies. And holding the hands of grown up people who need their hands held. And hugging those who need or want to be hugged, including animal companions.

The particular difficulties of my life feel like so much drivel when there’s a baby asleep on my chest, or I’m making pillow forts with a five-year-old, or holding the hand of someone happy or grieving, anxious or excited.

Those experiences reinforce a believe that the love inherent in those actions has the power to vanquish political leaders who break people and infrastructure with no intention of mending. I need to feel that love as often as possible.

We need to step into a deeper conversation about enchantment and agape, and to actively explore a greater capacity to love other humans. The old ideas—the crushing immorality of maintaining the nation-state, the life-destroying belief that to care for others is to be weak, and that to be generous is to be foolish—can have no future with us.

~Barry Lopez, from Embrace Fearlessly the Burning World

What if holding was the starting point? What if hands and children were held as much as they needed to be held? What if the Donalds and the Petes, the Pams, the Kristis and the Elons got the love they needed at all the crucial points they needed to receive it?

How about that?

Everything is about love and the absence of love.

When I am not tethered to love I am lost. I want lie down, pull the blanket to my chin and sleep for a very long time.

But babies, children and grieving adults, even pets, do not owe me love or comfort, so when they are absent, I find both, walking, hiking woods and mountains, and meandering through fields and along riverbanks.

Long ago, I stumbled into a grove of pine trees in a Maine forest, and one invited me to lean against it. The only requirement was a desire to lean.

It is more important now to be in love than to be in power. ~Barry Lopez

This is an essay from my Substack newsletter, Glorious Ordinary, which you can read here.

Regarding AI: I do not use it in any part of my writing or recording processes: from conceiving and nurturing ideas, to editing drafts, to writing and recording the final essay. Everything you read and listen to is the work of one human.

Let’s work together!

* I’m an executive and life coach, and my niche is working with people living with type 1 diabetes. I've lived with T1D for 30+ years, and share a compassion borne of lived experience. I work with people "in the gap.” Folks who are doing "fine" clinically, but get little support navigating daily life events. Diabetes inserts itself into every aspect of life. You don’t have to manage alone. Contact me here on Substack, or LinkedIn.

* Mindfulness is key to my work and writing. Find my talks and guided meditations on Insight Timer.

Life waylaid me this week so I’m reposting an essay relevant to these times.

This now is no different than any other now. The place we find ourselves isn’t anyplace new, and the consequences of choices made will unfold in the places it always has—neighborhoods, workplaces, schools, small towns, big cities, every place we live, work, play.

Be kind and generous—throw your arm over someone’s shoulder and pull them close.

I write, produce and narrate these essays. I also write poetry. Contact me for projects and collaborations.

I am a life and executive coach, and a meditation teacher. My coaching niche is working with people with type 1 diabetes. I bring a compassion borne of lived experience to my work. Message me on Substack.

Glorious Ordinary is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

This is a clip of my Insight Timer talk about irritation and annoyance which are at the root of anger. Find the talk here: The Roots of Anger: Irritation and Annoyance

And the companion meditation here: Meditation: Releasing Irritation