Gospel Matrescence

Are we accidentally teaching our children to pay too much attention to themselves—their comfort, preferences, feelings, and frustrations? In this episode, we explore Charlotte Mason’s idea of the “self-regardful child” and the often-forgotten virtue of fortitude. We’ll talk about how well-meaning parents can unintentionally magnify a child’s discomfort, why learning to tolerate small hardships matters, and how minor discomfort builds fortitude.  The goal isn’t to raise tougher kids who ignore pain—it’s to raise children who discover that discomfort doesn’t have to occupy their whole field of vision.

The excerpt from Vol. 2, Parents & Children by Charlotte Mason, read in this episode, is written below: 

Fortitude––Perhaps parents are less fully awake to the importance of regulating a child's sensations. We still kiss the place to make it well, make an obvious fuss if a string is uncomfortable or a crumpled rose-leaf is irritating the child's tender skin. We have forgotten the seven Christian virtues and the seven deadly sins of earlier ages, and do not much consider in the bringing up of our children whether the grace of fortitude is developing under our training. Now fortitude has its higher and its lower offices. It concerns itself with things of the mind and with things of the body, and, perhaps, it is safe to argue that fortitude on the higher plane is only possible when it has become the habit of the nature on the lower [the physical plane]. A baby may be trained in fortitude, and is much the happier for such training. A child should be taught that it is beneath him to take any notice of cold or heat, pain or discomfort. We do not perceive the sensations to which we do not attend, and it is quite possible to forget even a bad toothache in some new and vivid interest. Health and happiness depend largely upon the disregard of sensations, and the child who is encouraged to say, 'I am so cold,' 'I am so tired,' 'My vest pricks me,'
vol 2 pg 287
and so on, is likely to develop into the hysterical girl or the hypochondriac man; for it is an immutable law, that, as with our appetites, so with our sensations, in proportion as we attend to them will they dominate us until a single sensation of slight pain or discomfort may occupy our whole field of vision, making us unaware that there is any joy in living, any beauty in the earth.
The Self-regarding Child no longer Humble––But these are the least of the reasons why a child should be trained to put up with little discomforts and take no notice. The child who has been allowed to become self-regardful in the matter of sensations, as of appetites, has lost his child's estate, he is no longer humble; he is in the condition of thinking about himself; instead of that infinitely blessed condition of not being aware of himself at all. Nor must we permit ourselves to make an exception to this rule in the case of the poor little invalid. For him, far more than for the healthy child, it is important that he should be trained to take no account of his sensations; and many a brave little hero suffers anguish without conscious thought, and therefore, of course, suffers infinitely less than if he had been induced to dwell upon his pains. We say, induced, because, though a child may cry with sudden distress, he does not really think about his aches and pains unless his thoughts be turned to his ailments by those about him.

What do children really need in order to grow into healthy, confident, capable adults? In this episode, we’re exploring three fundamental needs of children and teens: agency, belonging, and competency. We’ll look at how modern childhood can unintentionally undermine all three—giving kids less freedom, less meaningful responsibility, and less connection to family and community—and what parents can do differently. How can we give our children the freedom to make meaningful choices, the security of knowing they are deeply known and needed, and the opportunity to discover, “I can do hard things”?

In this episode, Andie explores the themes in the book The Push by Ashley Audrain. Even if you don't intend to read the book, you will glean wisdom and perspective on the topics this novel explores.

Do you ever question the attachment bond you have with your children? Do you have thoughts about motherhood that you are afraid to share with anyone?  How do we respond when we witness disturbing behavior in our children, or even in ourselves?  

Through this thought-provoking novel, we'll discuss motherhood, attachment, family systems, generational trauma, and the pressure many moms feel to be perfect. We'll also explore why repair, grace, and self-awareness matter far more than perfection. 

In this episode, Andie delves into the themes explored in Kristin Hannah's book, The Great Alone. Even if you don't intend to read the book, you will glean wisdom and perspective on the topics this novel explores.

We'll explore family systems, childhood resilience, generational patterns, and the profound impact parents have on shaping their children's emotional lives. We will take a courageous look at emotional and verbal abuse, even in Christian families.  The story invites us to consider both the wounds we inherit and the healing we can pass on.

Join us as we discuss how love, wisdom, and healthy relationships can help break unhealthy cycles and create a different future for the next generation.

In this episode, Andie explores the themes in the book The Four Winds by Kristin Hannah. Even if you don't intend to read the book, you will glean wisdom and perspective on the topics this novel explores.

Together, we'll discuss what this story teaches about resilience, sacrifice, and the quiet strength of motherhood in seasons of suffering. We'll also consider how hardship shapes our character and how the way we respond to adversity leaves a lasting legacy for our children.

Whether you're a parent or simply navigating a difficult season, this episode will encourage you to find hope, courage, and purpose even when life doesn't unfold as planned.

This is the first in a four-part podcast series looking at fiction books, and how they can shape our view of parenting & motherhood as well as grow in us in wisdom, empathy, and eternal perspective that we desperately need as mothers. 

In this episode, Andie explores the themes in the book The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah. Even if you don't intend to read the book, you will glean wisdom and perspective on the topics this novel explores.

This powerful story examines courage, sacrifice, motherhood, and the remarkable strength ordinary people display during extraordinary circumstances. We'll reflect on what history teaches us about love, perseverance, and choosing faithfulness even in the darkest moments.

Together, we'll discover how great fiction expands our compassion and reminds us that small acts of courage can leave an eternal impact.

What if some of the most important moments in your family are the ones that don’t feel fun at all in the moment? In this episode, we explore the powerful idea of “Type 2 Fun” — experiences that are difficult while they’re happening but become deeply meaningful and memorable afterward — and how these moments help build antifragile kids who grow stronger through challenge rather than weaker from discomfort. Why is leading our children in Type 2 Fun activities hard for us as moms, and what kind of character and connection are we missing out on when we avoid this?  In this episode, Andie explores the lost art of building resiliency and gratitude in ourselves and our children through Type 2 Fun.  

Hypocrite: a person whose behavior contradicts their stated beliefs, feelings, or expectations of others.  

Do you ever feel like you are surrounded by little hypocrites?  Or maybe big hypocrites?  Do you ever find yourself acting like a hypocrite and need to correct yourself?  In this episode, Andie looks to Jesus' response to Simon (a major hypocrite!) in Luke 7.  What can we learn from His example, and how can we apply it in our own homes?  

Do you ever wonder if your needs as a mama actually matter?  Do you often feel as though you are responsible for other's legetimate needs, but no one is actually concerned about your own legitimate needs?  Then this episode is for you!  

Mamas have many legitimate needs:  rest, good food, exercise, time with the Lord, connection with others, time in nature, etc. Seeking to get our needs met is so important, but there are two ways to do it.  One way leads to further frustration and disconnection, and the other leads to connection and fulfillment.  Take a listen to this podcast and do an honest evaluation on how you seek to get your needs met!  

In this episode, Andie summarizes the second half of "The Collapse of Parenting" by taking a deeper look into the formation of virtue and reason in a child's heart and mind.  In his book, Sax argues that for thousands of years, parents knew that virtue must be formed through habit in the heart of a child, long before the child has the capacity of reason.  However, in modernparenting methods, parents wait to see evidence of reason before they require or train towards virtue.   Join the discussion and think through how you are forming virtue (or lack thereof) in your children!