You probably have heard that God did not give us the 10 Suggestions, He gave us the 10 Commandments. That is very true, but there is a critical difference to be considered on how God sees the commands versus how we see the commands.

That energy is spent trying to get them to change and spent when they do not change in the time frame you want or expect. It creates stress and tension and it's all because you are trying to do something that even GOD DOES NOT DO! God does not make us change—He wants it, invites us to see how His way is best, but leaves it up to us to reject what is best for us!

Remember the "4 Mistakes That Cripple Relationships". (Go to Course 05A to get the details.) Each mistake tries to control or limit the freedom of the people around you. Unfortunately, we only recognize the Dictator as being controlling.

Maybe you have heard, "Beauty is skin deep, but ugly goes to the bone." Actually, according to God, beauty—incorruptible beauty—is as deep as your soul. And, it's available without any exercise, medical procedures, pills, drugs or diets.

Louie and I have heard that many times from both men and women. Does that mean the biblical designs are wrong? Of course not. Just because I have a design does not mean that the design will be properly utilized. For example, have you ever used a common kitchen knife as a screwdriver? It can be used that way, but the design is not as useful as when the knife is used to spread jelly or butter on some bread.

Results AND Relating is a great principle for any relationship to use and it is imperative for great leadership. The principle is just another way to talk about the image of God—Separate, Powerful (Results)—Belonging, Relational (Relating).

Your relationships will be just like the couple above when the image of God is distorted. Men's testosterone puts a focus on power for men and women's estrogen-progesterone focus on relating. Of course, development can focus men on relating and women on power, so we have a real mess. Whether based on design or development, each of us tends to have a preference for power or relating. Too much power becomes "My way or the highway!" Too much relating becomes "Can't we all just get along!"

If the image of God is best described by the two words—Powerful and Relational, then we should be able to find scriptures to support the idea.

Here is what you may have been taught is the image of God: God has emotions—mankind has emotions; God has intellect—mankind has intellect; God has a will—mankind has a will. While true, here is a better option—God's image has something to do with maleness and femaleness. Genesis 1:26-27 are the first verses that use "image of God".

Women are an absolutely stunning creation and blessing from God. I can identify with Adam's pleasure when he first saw Eve. That is a common feeling when I look at Louie, even to this day.