Grappling with the Gray

When we know the solution, why does it continue to elude us?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Paul Edwards, 🟦 Melissa Hughes, Ph.D., and K Kimi Hirotsu Ziemski join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is out topic:

My colleague Tim Richardson posted about his trip to a big box store, where he forgot to unload a case of beverages from his cart into the car.

He was 40 miles away when he realized his mistake. He called the store and explained what happened. The response was predictable.

“I’m sorry… there’s nothing we can do.”

On his third call, he reached the store manager—Donna. She asked what he bought, where he had parked, and what he was wearing. Then she explained:

“If I get that info, 100% of the time I can find the item on our security footage.” An hour, she called Tim back:

“We found the person who took your item,” she said. “It’s been returned.”

How had Donna managed that?

She called the customer and thanked them for helping another customer find their missing item. She said: “I know how busy life can get, and I’m sure you haven’t had a chance to return the item yet—when you do, we’ll make sure it’s returned to the rightful owner.” She thanked them again for looking out for others.

With this approach, Donna said, the merchandise almost always gets returned the same day.

It doesn’t sound so hard. So why do frontline employees so often hide behind processes rather than take initiative? Why do we naturally default to suspicion and confrontation rather than give the benefit of the doubt? And what can we do to promote this type of response which typically leads to better outcomes, greater customer satisfaction, and a healthier society?

Meet the panel:

Paul Edwards used to drive large military vehicles through the deserts of the Middle East, armed with an assault rifle. Today, his occupation of ghostwriting requires him to ask questions first, and shoot later.”

Melissa Hughes is Founder and Principal of the Andrick Group, applying recent brain research to improve employee engagement, company culture, team dynamics, and innovation.

Kimi Hirotsu Ziemski is Founder of KSP Partnership, providing project management and project leadership courses and workshops to improve team dynamics and communications.

#ethics

#leadership

#culture

#accountability

#mindset

Is a little deception ever a good thing?

That's the question that drives the conversation when 🎙️William C. Attaway, ☘️Mark O'Brien, and • Sue Tinnish, PhD join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic:

On June 20, President Trump told the world he would decide "within the next two weeks" whether to strike Iran. Two days later, B-2 stealth bombers dropped 30-ton bombs in an effort to cripple Iran’s nuclear program.

"It was a head fake," a Trump adviser told Axios. "He knew the media couldn't resist amplifying it. He knew the Iranians might think he was bluffing. Well, everyone was wrong."

"The president wanted to buy time," another adviser said. "He knew what he wanted to do. And he knows he can't look eager for war. So all the folks in MAGA urging restraint gave him some space." At the same time, Trump remained open to aborting the mission if a diplomatic window emerged.

For purposes of this discussion, let’s assume that eliminating Iran’s nuclear capability was a wise and defensible decision. But what about the President’s use of deception and disinformation to do it?

If a leader can benefit his people (in this case, possibly saving many lives) through misdirection, does that justify doing so. Or could the long term loss to future credibility outweigh the short term benefits? If he lies about this, will people not wonder what else he is lying about?

Meet the panel:

William Attaway is an executive coach, speaker and podcaster, helping 7 & 8 figure entrepreneurs, C-suite leaders, & agency owners achieve clear-minded focus, calm control, & confidence.

Mark O’Brien is founder and principal of O’Brien Communications Group, a B2B brand-management and marketing-communications firm — and host of The Anxious Voyage, a syndicated radio show about life’s trials and triumphs.

Sue Tinnish is an executive coach, employing a unique blend of soft skills and technical knowledge, as well as a Peer Leaders Group Chair with Vistage Worldwide, Inc.

#ethics 

#leadership 

#integrity 

#accountability 

#culture

How far can we stretch truth in advertising?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Christopher Bauer, PhD, CSP, CFS, Nancy J. Capistran, PCC, CPC, and S. Scott Mason join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our ethics challenge:

In Paducah, Kentucky, neighbors called police reporting a 9-year-old who set up a roadside stand in front of his house. He held up a sign advertising not lemonade by “Ice Cold Beer.”

Officers arrived to find young Colton Ray proudly handing out frosty mugs of root beer, grinning like a kid who just discovered capitalism.

“I just wanted people to stop and buy some root beer,” Colton explained. “And boy, did they!”

Local officers applauded the creativity, and sales reportedly tripled after the incident.

Colton told reporters he’s considering a lemonade spin-off next, under the banner: “Locally Sourced Moonshine.” His parents are both proud and slightly terrified.

This story appeared recently in the Paducah Insider, a news satire and parody publication modeled after the Onion and the Babylon Bee. But what if the story had been true?

Was the ad for cold beer deceptive, or did it merely omit enough information and allow people to draw their own conclusions? When we intentionally blur the lines governing truth in advertising, is that just good business, or does it cross the lines into misrepresentation? What other insights might we find in the apocryphal story of young Colton Ray?

Meet the panel:

Christopher Bauer is a Speaker, Author, and Consultant on Ethics, Compliance, and Accountability.

Nancy Capistran is an executive coach, CEO strategic advisor, internationally published author, and Peer Leaders Group Chair with Vistage Worldwide, Inc.

Scott Mason, aka the Myth Slayer, is a speaker, podcast host, and coach working with executives and entrepreneurs to Magnetize & Monetize Professional Freedom by Dislodging Toxic Myths to Ignite the Charisma Within.

#ethics 

#culture 

#accountability 

#leadership 

#communication

How can we explain toxic trends in opposite directions?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Kimberly Davis, Jennifer Hyland, and Peter Winick join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic:

In this week’s headlines, Inc.com highlighted a viral April 12 post that described the Robert W. Baird investment bank as “The Epitome of a Sweatshop.” In response, the Wall Street Journal reported bosses bullying into working 110-hour weeks, ignoring the firm’s no-work-on-Saturday policy, and sending emails at 3:30 am to check that employees were still online.

As far back as 2017, Inc.com columnist Jacob Morgan ranked Baird third on his list of companies with the lowest-scoring employee experience. The WSJ reported that such practices in the industry routinely contribute to serious health problems and have even been linked to employee deaths. Ironically, but not surprisingly, bosses at Baird frequently complain about low productivity.

The same news feed included an article in Forbes describing the rise of “snow-plow” managers who refuse to delegate, thereby contributing to their own stress, isolation, and burnout while disempowering and demoralizing employees.

It seems bizarre to witness the simultaneous rise of two such antithetical trends. What they do have in common, however, is bosses pursuing practices that so clearly run counter to their own best interests as well as those of the company.

How can we explain the rise of such disparate lose-lose behaviors? And what can be done to put a stop to them?

Meet the panel:

Kimberly Davis is an author, TEDx speaker, and founder of Brave Leadership, leading development programs world-wide, around authentic leadership, purpose, presence, and influence.

Jennifer Hyland serves as Deputy Chief Constable with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. She is an advisor and mentor dedicated to a future built on a foundation of principled leadership.

Peter Winick works with individuals and organizations to build and grow revenue streams through their thought leadership platforms and is host of the Leveraging Thought Leadership podcast.


#ethics
#leadership
#culture
#accountability
#mindset

What happens when employees perceive a scalpel as an axe?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Tom Gegax joins me to Grapple with the Gray and Kirsten Yurich sits in as cohost.

Here is our topic:

Employee performance, especially in large companies, is likely to follow the bell curve. A few superstars, a lot of solid performers, and a few underperformers. Amazon has developed an innovative way of dealing with the third group: it’s called the Pivot Program.

Employees who do not meet management performance expectations are given three options:

1) Leave with a severance package.
2) Accept entry into the Pivot program to help them “improve” and remain at Amazon.
3) If they fail to convince their manager that they have “improved,” then they can appeal.

At each stage the worker is offered a progressively lower severance payment in return for a release of claims and promise not to sue.

The consensus on Reddit is that the Pivot program is designed to coerce employees to quit while fabricating evidence to defend firing them if they don’t. It is described as humiliating for employees who go through it and toxic for employees who fear they might have to. The claim is that employees rarely, or never, pass the program.

Certainly, companies need to have some process for dealing with employees who are not meeting expectations. Is Amazon’s model intrinsically flawed, or are underperforming employees merely bitter? In general, how can leaders preserve employee dignity while maintaining performance standards?

On this special episode, I'm joined by Tom Gegax, former CEO of Tires Plus, Chairman of Gramercy Fund--a socially responsible venture capital fund--and focus of the film ‘Confessions of a CEO’: Blowing the Whistle on Corporate America,’ which features Robert Kennedy Jr., Deepak Chopra, and Blue Zones founder Dan Buettner.

Described as a pioneer, a renaissance man, and a real life Forest Gump, Tom narrates his personal transformation from a toxic CEO to a visionary leader advocating for healthier company culture and more responsible leadership in business and government. His campaign for personal responsibility and corporate accountability made him irresistible to me, and I feel privileged to have him as a guest.

As you will hear, Tom has vocal chord damage from radiation treatment for cancer. But his message is too important to let that get in the way.

Kirsten Yurich is an Organizational Performance Management Consultant, Peer Leaders Group Chair with Vistage Worldwide, Inc., and Adjunct Professor of Education at Felician University.

#ethics 

#leadership 

#culture 

#accountability 

#mindset

How much does the government need to know to do its job?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Krista Crawford, Ph.D., MBA, SPHR, Sarah Kalmeta, and Jolanta Pomiotlo join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

And here is our topic:

Paul Whelan, a 55-year-old retired U.S. Marine, was freed from Russia last summer after being imprisoned on false espionage charges for more than five years. After the first year of his detention, his employer cut his job and his insurance coverage. When he finally arrived home, Mr. Whelan found that he did not qualify for unemployment because he had not worked in Michigan recently.

A member of Congress had to contact Michigan's secretary of state just for Mr. Whelan to get a driver's license and identification. And being convicted of a crime in Russia, even a crime the U.S. government declared was bogus, hindered his getting a Global Entry card because he was arrested and imprisoned overseas. Apparently, Customs and Border Patrol didn’t have access to the pictures of the president meeting him at Andrews Air Force Base when he came back.

Strangest of all, when Mr. Whelan tried to get full Medicaid coverage through the state he received a letter back saying that he didn't qualify because he wasn't a U.S. citizen. And his story is not unique.

NPR seemed to miss the irony when they aired this story on March 27, scarcely two minutes before a story questioning why the Department of Government Efficiency needs access to citizens’ private data and personal information.

Ostensibly, DOGE is charged with scouring government records for signs of waste, fraud and abuse… not to mention inefficiency. Might Paul Whelan reasonably argue that protecting our data is no more urgent than ensuring that government agencies make better use of that data to serve U.S. citizens?

There’s always going to be tension between protecting personal freedoms and providing for the general welfare. Is it possible to balance one against the other without descending into partisan politics?

Meet this week’s panel:

Krista Crawford is a human resource consultant, adjunct instructor at Virginia Tech and Champlain College, and Group Chair with Vistage Worldwide, Inc.

Sarah Kalmeta, aka Sarah the Pivoter, is a speaker, author and relentless truthseeker. She is founder of Pivot Point International, a high performance consulting company.

Jolanta Pomiotlo is Vice President of Information Technology for EXSIF Worldwide who manages innovative initiatives aimed at reducing operating costs, improving profit, and growing revenue.

#ethics
#culture
#accountability
#leadership
#politics

When the problem is always someone else's fault, is there any hope of finding a solution?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Deb Coviello The Drop In CEO™, Diane Helbig, and ☘️Mark O'Brien join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic:

A recent headline in Politico declared: “Republicans have hated universities for years. Anti-war protests gave them a reason to punish them.”

We can debate the merit of conservative criticisms of American universities. But headlines like this one do nothing to advance civil discourse or productive debate by suggesting those criticisms have no basis.

In 2015, video maker Ami Horowitz collected 50 signatures in an hour on Yale campus calling for the repeal of the First Amendment… which includes, ironically, the right to petition. This was not long after a Yale administrator was fired for daring to suggest that students should be trusted to choose appropriate Halloween costumes without faculty supervision.

The following year, University of Chicago Dean John Ellison wrote in letter to students:

"Our commitment to academic freedom means that we do not support so-called trigger warnings, we do not cancel invited speakers because their topics might prove controversial and we do not condone the creation of intellectual safe spaces where individuals can retreat from ideas and perspectives at odds with their own."

Unfortunately, his has been a nearly lone voice in the wilderness. Especially since October 7, a horrifying rise in antisemitic rhetoric and violence has made university campus spaces anything but safe for Jewish students.

Even if one disapproves of responses by the Trump administration, casting Republicans as perpetrators while ignoring legitimate, systemic problems will only intensify polarization and extremism.

How do we explain increasing unwillingness to confront issues honestly? And what can we do about it?

Meet this week’s panel:

Deb Coviello, aka the Drop in CEO, is an author, speaker, podcast host, and silver medalist curler who coaches C-Suite leaders of today and tomorrow to navigate challenges with confidence.

Diane Helbig is Chief Improvement Catalyzer at Helbig Enterprises, providing guidance and training to business owners and leaders around the world.

Mark O’Brien is founder and principal of O’Brien Communications Group, a B2B brand-management and marketing-communications firm — and host of The Anxious Voyage, a syndicated radio show about life’s trials and triumphs.

#ethics
#culture
#accountability
#leadership
#education
#media

Which is worse: conscious bias or unconscious bias?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Paul Glover, 🟦 Melissa Hughes, Ph.D., and Annette Taylor join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic:

On March 10th, Washington Post columnist and Associate Editor Ruth Marcus resigned after four decades with the paper. She accused Chief Executive and Publisher Will Lewis of killing her column criticizing owner Jeff Bezos' announcement that the opinion section will henceforth only publish views consistent with the values of individual liberties and free markets.

For years, conservatives have condemned large metropolitan newspapers for liberal bias. But those objections were against political ideology creeping into hard news stories, and also for misrepresentation of facts in support of opinion. Not for the opinions themselves.

The original intent of the op-ed page was to present alternative views to those of a paper’s own editorial perspective, thereby promoting integrity of thought and advancing spirited debate.

This new policy of Jeff Bezos appears to be yet another example of backlash and reactionaryism, objecting so fiercely that objectors become the object of their own objections.

In 2017, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch ran an editorial responding to claims of bias by declaring, “Yes, we are biased, and that’s the way it should be.” I responded in a letter that opinion and bias are two entirely different things. I received a two-line reply stating, essentially, “No, we’re right and you’re wrong.”

So, is there a difference between opinion and bias? Do newspapers have an obligation to present opposing viewpoints? And who should set editorial policy: the owner, the publisher, the editor-in-chief, or an editorial board?

Meet this week’s panel:

Paul Glover is the No B.S. Leadership Coach - Guiding Leaders on Their Journey to Their Mountaintop. He is a TEDx speaker and author of Work Quake: Making the Seismic Shift to a "Knowledge Economy"

Melissa Hughes is Founder and Principal of the Andrick Group, applying recent brain research to improve employee engagement, company culture, team dynamics, and innovation.

Annette Taylor is a researcher of evolutionary psychology and biology. Her website, Cavedweller Club, offers guidance and insights on how we can better understand the way our own hardwiring influences unconscious bias and decision making.


#ethics
#leadership
#culture
#accountability
#mindset

How can we explain society simultaneously becoming insensitive and hypersensitive?

That's the question that drives the conversation when
Mark Brown, CSP, Kimberly Davis, and Kirsten Yurich join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic

A recent article in National Review by Kayla Bartsch laments how the concept of RSVP has died an ignominious death among her fellow Gen Z-ers.

She writes:  “Whereas stories of old emphasized the importance of honesty and integrity — of the sanctity of giving one’s word — these old-fashioned virtues of gentility are largely lost on my digital generation when it comes to RSVPs.”

The truth is, responding to invitations should be easier than ever.  Even if the younger set relates to email the way Boomers think of quill and parchment, platforms like Evite and Paperless Post have been superseded by a snazzy app called Partiful.  But that doesn’t seem to help.

My only quibble with Ms. Bartsch is that I don’t believe this is exclusively a Gen-Z problem or that it’s limited to invitations.  Ghosting has become normative behavior in both the social and business worlds.  If I have nothing to gain by communicating with you, you simply cease to exist.

Ironically, amidst a culture that has become hyper-fixated on microaggressions, pronouns, and myriad sensitivities to other people’s feelings, how do we explain the lack of basic civility that makes it okay to ignore our fellow human beings, even the ones who care enough to invite us to share their lives?

Meet this week’s panel:

Mark Brown is an executive speaking coach, helping top international leaders to elevate their performance, influence and impact. He is a world champion international speaker, and devoted husband of Andrea.

Kimberly Davis is an author, TEDx speaker, and founder of the Brave Leadership University, leading development programs world-wide, around authentic leadership, purpose, presence, and influence.

Kirsten Yurich is an Organizational Performance Management Consultant, Peer Leaders Group Chair with Vistage Worldwide, Inc., and Adjunct Professor of Education at Felician University.

#ethics 

#culture 

#accountability 

#leadership 

#communication

Is justice served if you talk your way out of court?

That's the question that drives the conversation when Christopher Bauer, PhD, CSP, CFS, Jennifer H. Elder, CSP, CPA, and Jeff Koziatek join the ethics panel to Grapple with the Gray.

Here is our topic:

Jewish folklore tells of a poor man who finds a billfold with $700 in it. At his synagogue, he reads on the notice board that a wealthy congregant has lost his billfold and is offering a $100 reward for it. He spots the owner and gives him the billfold.

The rich man counts the money and says, “I see you already took your reward.”

The poor man answers, “I don’t understand.”

“This billfold had $800 in it when I lost it. Now it’s a hundred short.”

They begin arguing, and eventually come before the rabbi.

Both congregants state their case. The rich man concludes by saying, “Rabbi, I trust you believe me.”

The rabbi answers, “Of course.” The rich man smiles. The poor man is crushed.

Then the rabbi hands the billfold to the poor man.

“What are you doing?!” cries the rich man.

The rabbi answers, “You are, of course, an honest man, and you say the billfold you lost had $800 in it. Therefore, I’m sure it did. But if the man who found this billfold is a liar and a thief, he wouldn’t have returned it at all. That means he also is telling the truth. In that case, this billfold must belong to somebody else. If that man steps forward, he’ll get the money. Until then, it belongs to the man who found it.”

“But what about my money?” the rich man asks.

“Well, we’ll just have to wait until somebody finds a billfold with $800 in it…”

What are we to make of the rabbi’s ruling?


Meet this week’s panel:


Christopher Bauer is a Speaker, Author, and Consultant on Ethics, Compliance, and Accountability.

Jennifer Elder is a CPA and Certified Speaking Professional who helps leaders future-proof their businesses by making smart decisions and staying ethical.

Jeff Koziatek is a certified speaker and peak performance coach, helping professionals to navigate change, sharpen focus, avoid burnout, and make a difference. He is also one of St. Louis Business Monthly's 100 St. Louisans you should know.