Your hand reaches for the phone before your brain catches up. For a split second, it feels perfectly natural to call your dad, your mom, your person and then reality hits, and the grief rushes in.

I share a moment that happened to me this morning: that honest, almost comforting impulse to ask my dad a question, followed by the ache of remembering he’s not here to answer. 

If you’ve had that experience, I want you to hear this clearly: you’re not broken. You don’t need to be fixed. That reflex doesn’t mean you’ve taken steps backward in your healing or that you’re “doing grief wrong.” It can be a sign of how real the bond still is, and how much you still want to share your life. It’s the reality of your love. Love that just needs to be carried differently. 

We also talk about how the grieving process actually moves, not like a neat checklist, but more like water. Sometimes grief hits like a wave. Sometimes you drift, then get caught on a rock, then move again. As The Caring Death Doula,  I offer grief support you can use in the moment: sit with what comes up, breathe, cry if you need to, and don’t compare your loss to anyone else’s. Your relationship was unique, so your grieving will be, too.

If this helped, subscribe, share it with someone who’s grieving a loved one, and leave a review so more people can find it. 

With care, Frances

I would love to hear: What’s the moment that catches you off guard most lately?

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