In this episode, we gently set aside the old story of grief — the tidy five stages — and make room for what mourning actually feels like. Whether your loss happened last week, last year, or a decade ago, whether you are mourning a spouse, a parent, a child, a friend, or someone the world does not easily let you grieve, you belong here. Host Dylan explores why grief moves in waves rather than steps, why yearning and anger and even laughter are all normal, and why there is no schedule you are failing to keep. This is the episode we all needed, offered with warmth and company.
What You'll Learn:
• Why the five stages were misunderstood, even by the researcher who wrote them
• How grief moves in waves instead of a straight line or checklist
• What the Dual Process Model reveals about swinging between sorrow and daily life
• Why yearning, not sadness, is often the strongest early experience of loss
• How anticipatory and disenfranchised grief deserve the same recognition
Key Insights
• Try a five-minute morning grounding practice when getting out of bed feels impossible
• Use a short nighttime steadying practice when grief wakes you at three a.m.
• Let laughter and memory coexist — guilt for laughing does not mean you loved less
• Remember that continuing bonds mean you can carry your person rather than let go
• Treat grief brain and broken sleep as signs of heavy inner work, not failure
Recommended Resources:
• American Psychological Association grief resources (apa.org) — evidence-based information on mourning and resilience
• The Dual Process Model research by Margaret Stroebe and Henk Schut, published in Death Studies (1999)
• Continuing Bonds by Dennis Klass, Phyllis Silverman, and Steven Nickman (1996), on carrying loved ones forward
Coming Up Next
Next week, we sit with continuing bonds — the tender idea that you do not have to let go of someone you love in order to keep living. You will leave with practical ways to keep their presence alive in mornings, rituals, and quiet moments.
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