A Personal Note from Iris

Before you listen to today’s episode, I want to share a bit of context.

The conversation you’re about to hear was originally recorded on the first anniversary of my father’s passing, July 1, 2025. At the time, I wasn’t ready to release it. It was a deeply personal moment of sitting with memory, love, and trying to make sense of life without him.

I am choosing to share it with you now, two years after his passing, because it highlights a truth we focus on so deeply here at Grieving Well: grief does not move in straight lines . It doesn’t follow a tidy timeline. Sometimes it is quiet, sometimes it is loud and heavy, but it is always present.

As an adult adoptee, losing my father stirred up a sense of loss that I realized I had been navigating my entire life. It opened the door to older, layered grief that I didn’t fully realize I was still carrying.

Whether you are grieving a fresh loss, navigating the anniversary of a painful milestone, or realizing that a current heartache is pulling up old wounds, I pray this episode meets you with gentleness. Grieving well doesn’t mean you “get over it”—it just means you are honest about what you are carrying.

My daddy standing with me at my 1st Birthday Party.

Key Reflections from the Episode

* The Concept of Layered Grief: How a major life event can suddenly act as a catalyst, resurfacing older, unarticulated losses from our past.

* Building a Foundation of Security: Remembering the intentional ways my father made me feel safe, and how those memories provide stability even in his absence.

* God’s Opinion vs. People-Pleasing: A crucial lesson my dad taught me about grounding my identity in what God says about me, rather than seeking validation from the outside world.

* Grieving with Hope: Finding an anchor in Psalm 34:18—knowing that God is close to the brokenhearted, binding up our wounds without minimizing our pain.

My escort on the night I was named Homecoming Queen at Clinton High School

Journaling & Community Resources

* Download Grieving Well: A Reflection Journal for Grief, Faith, and Healing If this episode brings things to the surface for you, use this download space to quietly reflect or journal through your thoughts.

* Audio Clip Feature: Stay tuned until the end of the episode to hear a precious, archived 2021 clip of my father sharing his own memories and wisdom. As he beautifully put it: “You can’t beat that man upstairs.”

* Join the Journey: If this reflection brought comfort to your heart, consider sharing it with someone else who is quietly carrying a heavy loss today.

Grief often comes with change—not just in what we’ve lost, but in who we no longer recognize ourselves to be.

In this episode of Grieving Well, Iris Peterson Bryant explores the tender experience of grieving identity loss—the silent sorrow that follows the death of a spouse, a parent, a job, or a role we once cherished. Through personal reflection, Scripture, and gentle encouragement, Iris invites listeners to name this hidden grief and find hope in the becoming.

Whether you've walked through a major life transition or simply feel disconnected from who you used to be, this episode will remind you:

🕊️ You are not lost to God—even when you feel lost to yourself.
🕊️ Your grief is valid, even when it's invisible to others.
🕊️ You are not starting from scratch—you’re starting from experience.

Plus, Iris shares three powerful journal prompts to help you reflect on identity, transition, and what you’re ready to carry forward.

Mentioned in this Episode:

• Psalm 139:14 – “You are fearfully and wonderfully made”
• Grieving Well Support Group (Eastern NC area)
• Journaling prompts for identity reflection

💛 Subscribe to Grieving Well and walk with us as we hold space for sorrow and remember that healing is possible.

🌐 For more support and details on our local gatherings, visit irispbryant.com.

Key Topics Covered:

• Handling the first holiday season without a loved one
• The challenge of changing traditional gathering locations
• Understanding grief as a journey of moving through, not moving on
• Dealing with grief-induced guilt and regret
• Practical tools for processing grief

Notable Quotes:

• "Grief isn't a problem to be solved – it's love that needs to be carried." - David Kessler
• "You don't get over it. You just get through it." - Brooke Noel

Resources Mentioned:

• "Can You Just Sit With Me? Healthy Grieving for the Losses in Life" by Natasha Smith
• "I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye" by Brooke Noel
• Scripture references: Isaiah 53:3, Isaiah 56:8, 1 Peter 5:7

Practical Tool Shared: Dialogue Journaling Practice for Processing Grief-Related Guilt

Connect:

• Follow Me on Facebook | Instagram
• Grieiving Well Resources
• Subscribe to Iris's Insights Substack

Have you ever experienced the pain of losing someone before they're actually gone?

This unique form of grief, known as anticipatory grief, can be a powerful and often overwhelming emotion. It occurs when individuals anticipate an impending loss, such as the death of a loved one or the end of a significant relationship.

Let’s Connect:

Instagram | Facebook

Website

Music by Jonathan Pegues

• Anniversaries of a loved one's death can reactivate intense grief reactions like intrusive thoughts, yearning, anger, anxiety and depression

• Iris launched her "Grieving Well" podcast on the 1st anniversary of her husband David's passing

• The day was excruciatingly painful despite efforts to do self-care activities like a massage, beach visit, lunch

• A text from David's best friend unleashed a wave of emotions as the shared grief struck her

• Her children and other loved ones intentionally offered love and support in tangible ways.

Key Takeaways:

• There is no right or wrong way to experience an anniversary of loss

• Allow yourself to feel whatever arises - sadness, anger, anxiety, relief after the day

• Plan ahead - take off work, visit meaningful places, write a letter, look at photos

• Lean on your support system

• Don't judge your emotions - grief is unpredictable

• Practice self-compassion

• Grief is "love with no place to go" after loss (quote from Robin Roberts’ Interview with Regina King)

• “Grief is a receipt.. . .It shows you loved someone deeply” (quote from Think You’ll Be Happy: Moving Through Grief with Grit, Grace, and Gratitude by Nicole Avant)

Suggestions:

• Feel the grief but also feel grateful for the love you shared

• Remembrance keeps the memory alive in a meaningful way 

• Find a support group or grief-informed therapist if needed

• Have compassion for yourself through this challenging journey

Let’s Connect:

Instagram | Facebook

Website

In this episode of "Grieving Well," host Iris shares her personal journey through grief following the loss of her husband, David. With raw honesty and vulnerability, Iris explores the physical toll of grief and offers practical advice for those navigating similar experiences. From chest pains to emotional breakdowns, Iris sheds light on the physical manifestations of grief and emphasizes the importance of seeking support and fortifying one's spiritual foundation.

Key Points:

• Iris reflects on her own experience of physical pain in the aftermath of her husband's passing, describing moments of chest discomfort and emotional exhaustion.
• She shares the insights she gained from reading the book I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye by Brooke Noel and Pamela Blair, which details the physical symptoms of grief.
• Iris recounts her visit to the doctor's office and subsequent diagnosis of prolonged bereavement, shedding light on the lesser-known aspects of grieving.
• Three key suggestions are offered for those dealing with grief: talk to someone, seek medical attention if necessary, and fortify your spiritual foundation.
• She concludes with a message of hope and encouragement, reminding listeners that they are not alone in their journey through grief.

Resources Mentioned:

• Book: "I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye" by Brooke Noel and Pamela Blair
• Support Group: GriefShare (a Christian-based grief support group)

Connect with Iris:

• Website: IrisPBryant.com
• Email: [email protected]
• Social Media: Facebook | Instagram
•  
• Support the Show:

• If you found this episode helpful, consider leaving a review on Apple Podcasts.
• Share this episode with someone who may benefit from its message.

Grieving Well Podcast: Episode 1 - Finding Purpose in Pain

Introduction:

Welcome to Grieving Well, a podcast designed to help those who have experienced loss find purpose in the midst of pain. Iris P. Bryant, podcast host, shares her personal journey of grief and healing after losing her husband, David. This episode explores Iris's transformative experiences and the lessons learned through grief.

Key Points:

• Iris reflects on a poignant final conversation with David before his surgery, highlighting the importance of time and purpose.

• She shares her commitment to grieving well and moving forward despite brokenness.

• The complexity of grief is discussed, including its emotional, physical, and spiritual dimensions.

• Iris emphasizes the necessity of honesty and openness in expressing grief to loved ones.

• The decision to surrender brokenness to God and seek complete healing is explored.

• Memories of David and the significance of unfinished moments are tenderly remembered.

• The role of faith and worship in navigating grief is discussed, emphasizing the power of God’s comfort and healing.

• Iris shares a heartfelt song that brings solace and expresses faith in God's presence through every trial.

Additional Resources:

• Join the newsletter | Sign up for monthly encouragement from Iris here

• Listen to “The Story I’ll Tell” by Naomi Raine

Connect on Social Media

• Instagram | Facebook

• Website

On April 18th, 2023, my life changed forever. I lost my best friend, soulmate, and the love of my life, my husband, David. Losing a loved one is one of life's most profound experiences. One that often leaves us feeling lost, alone, and overwhelmed by emotions we may not fully understand. But in the midst of the darkness, there is light.

This is "Grieving Well" because healing begins when we acknowledge our pain and give ourselves permission and the space to grieve well. Subscribe now and together let's navigate the path of grief towards healing and hope.