Half Better

When it comes to to-do lists and being productive, one of the biggest things that come to mind is, “I need a planner.”

But the question is, what kind of planner? In today’s episode of the podcast, we chat with Megan Seeley about how we can match a planner to our personality so that we can find one that works best for each one of us as an individual.

Megan Seeley is the Planning Fairy Godmother over at The Goal Designer, where she coaches clients on how to find the best planner, and more importantly, the processes and rituals to keep using that planner.

We talk about how self-care rituals are often forgotten about, but should actually be the first thing scheduled in each week. We tackle the question head-on of how to still be productive, yet not feel like you’re running ragged all the time. Here’s a hint: the only way to be happy and productive is to make sure that you’re taking care of yourself first. Using her Plan to Plan process, Megan walks listeners through the steps for keeping those non-negotiables front and center. Once those are scheduled in, you can worry about obligations to other people, and counter to what you see everywhere else, your to-do list is the very last thing that you put in your planner!

We also talk with Megan about personality types and why she started pairing Gretchen Rubin’s Four Tendencies (Obliger, Upholder, Questioner, Rebel) with different planners. We definitely learned several things in this section of the interview about how our tendencies guide our thinking and ability to stick with a certain planner.

We round out the interview with a few tips for sticking with your planner in 2019 so that you can achieve those goals that you’ve set for yourself. It was a blast to speak with Megan and we are honored to have had her on our podcast.

We definitely recommend that you head on over the thegoaldesigner.com and take her quiz to see what planner would work best for you. You never know: your inability to stick with your planners might have absolutely nothing to do with you, but everything to do with your planner!

Enjoy!

Links:

• The Goal Designer
• Home | Brené Brown
• Gretchen Rubin
• Simplified® by Emily Ley
• Home - Wodapalooza
• Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results by James Clear
• Full Focus Planner™ | A planner by Michael Hyatt
• Simplified Planner – Simplified® by Emily Ley
• Bullet Journal
• The Plan to Plan Podcast — The Goal Designer

The best advice I know of in this situation is, if you want to change someone else, change yourself. People change because they’re inspired by someone else’s example, not because they were coerced into doing it. People change because they see in someone else what’s Probable, not because someone harasses them over and over about what’s Possible. You will never change someone else unless you find the courage and the will and the resolve to change Yourself.

We’ve all said it at one time or another (either out loud or in our head). “I just wish my partner would change or do XYZ.” I bet you can think of one thing right now that you’d love for your partner to change or do.

Here’s the thing: You cannot change anyone else. Period.

I know that might sound odd coming from us here at Half Better where we’re all about making small improvements together, but here’s the thing: personal development is just that. Personal. No one else can do it for you. No one else can make you do it. You have to want it. All by yourself.

But wait - there’s hope. While you can’t change someone else, you can influence them.

We are not counselors or licensed therapists. We are just two people who are really interested in personal development, couples goals setting, and being productive so that we can be present together. We have experience within a partnership where we have both seen the benefits of personal growth and growing together. We have experience with trying to make someone change and that backfiring, and today on the podcast we’re going to talk about all of it!

We’ll lay out 4 ways to influence your partner towards growth and to encourage them to be supportive of your own growth. While everyone has the ability to change, it does not mean everyone will choose to change. A person has to want it all on their own to actually do the work required to change. So we’re going to talk today about how to tip the scales in favor of encouraging growth in your partnership.

What ways have you found helpful to encourage or support growth in your partner?

Links:

• Family HQ — Half Better
• 5by5
• Mel Robbins | Speaker, CNN Contributor, Creator: 5 Second Rule
• What to do when your partner is unsupportive | Mel Robbins - YouTube
• You're Growing, but the People in Your Life Are Not. Here's What to Do.
• Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones - Kindle edition by James Clear. Health, Fitness & Dieting Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.

Well, we finally finished the book, Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne. Procrastination much?

Moving past the guilt associated with that, this book was good for an end of the year/beginning of the year read, as it forced both of us to assess our current lifestyle and pair it down to match our goals. To simplify, not only our physical stuff in the form of decluttering but to also take a hard look at the rhythms and schedule we have for our whole family (not just us).

Simplicity Parenting is really a goals and dream book. Remember when you first got married and together you dreamed about how life would be when….? Do you even remember what those dreams are? Does your life currently reflect those dreams? Are you heading in the direction of those dreams? The author, Kim John Payne, encourages couples to pull out those dreams again, dust them off, and align the details of your daily life to match those goals. So often, we get caught up in the swift current of doing more and a busy schedule that we forget what it was we wanted for ourselves. And it’s not that you forgot your dreams, you just put them on the back burner for that time when… and when seems increasingly farther and farther away. But as we talked about in Episode 35, you need to distill your dreams down into daily actions, and as we discuss on the podcast today, we talk about actionably doing this with your schedule, routines, and rhythms.

This book reminded me that the exact same things that are beneficial for us as adults (such as routines, cutting out distraction so you can have deep work, cutting down on decision fatigue) are also vitally important for children. When you are able to simplify and add rhythms for the whole family, the results you achieve are usually “far more reaching and powerful” than what you thought might occur. Kim John Payne points out that by putting in a little bit of work in these areas, you’ll gain time for connection, increase security and ease in relationships, and for partners, increase your intimacy. And who doesn’t want more of that? Intimacy can’t happen in the hustle and bustle of crazy home life, it happens in those downtime moments, and when you simplify, you can have more and more of those moments.

If you’re feeling like life with kids is crazy, that you’re just spinning your wheels, doing the day to day thing without really connecting with your spouse or your children, then this is a really important episode for you. Because after all, the author points out, “it’s not just what you make of your time, it’s whether you have the time to make it your own.”

Our challenge for you, dear listeners, this week is to write out an ideal week, individually at first, and then share it with your partner. As we discuss in the podcast, make sure to build some routines or consistency, and also some times for connection. It is in those small moments of connection that life is lived.

Our next book will be Atomic Habits by James Clear if you want to read alongside us.

Download our new freebie, How to Create a Family HQ! This is a step-by-step guide that will walk you through setting up a Family HQ so that you can get your family all on the same page.

Links:

• Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books
• 20+ Questions For a New Year | The Art of Simple
• Meditation and Mindfulness Made Simple - Headspace
• Calvinball
• Cortex - Relay FM
• Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results by James Clear

Happy New Year! 

Yep - it’s that time of year when everyone is setting goals and resolutions, or making declarations about what they are going to achieve in 2019.  We’re doing the same thing, but with a little twist - goal setting is absolutely something that we do with each other in mind.  

Today on the podcast, we chat about our recent get away to the Len Foot Hike Inn for our goal setting session.  We cover lots of things, such as:

This one is for you, if you’re looking to get you and your partner on track to living the life you always dreamed of.  We break it down easy for how to take those big dreams and fit them into your weekly schedule. 

As we mentioned in the podcast, we want to keep those goals front and center, so if you’re willing to share your goals, snap a picture, or make a background like @zachary_lang and tag us @halfbetter.us so we can cheer you on!  

Links:

• Half Better
• The Hike Inn
• Full Focus Planner | A planner by Michael Hyatt
• The LifeScore Assessment by Michael Hyatt
• Mindset Reset With Mel Robbins
• Podcast: Why and How to Set SMARTER Goals — Half Better
• 5 Days to Your Best Year Ever!
• Best Year Ever Recap and “Ah-hah’s” — Half Better
• Living Forward | A Proven Plan to Stop Drifting and Get the Life You Want
• Podcast: Living Forward (Book Discussion) — Half Better
• Enneagram of Personality - Wikipedia
• Whole Life Challenge – The Game That Changes Your Whole Life
• High Performance Planner OFFICIAL
• STREAKS. The to-do list that helps you form good habits. For iPhone.
• Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books
• AutoSleep
• Collaborate & Create Amazing Graphic Design for Free – Canva

Today on HalfBetter, we check in on where we are and what we’re up to as the year comes to a close.

It’s a pretty candid conversation about how we’re struggling with a lot of things right now as the year comes to a close. As two people who view ourselves as productive and good with systems, we discuss our frustration and thoughts on this time of year and how it can really affect everyone. We dive into some excellent topics such as:

We recorded late at night - 10:00pm to be precise, which goes to show you just how off our rhythms and ideal week we are! Yet I wouldn’t change that, because I think it gives a pretty true to life nod to the fact that we’re both struggling with falling off the bandwagon. Sometimes trying to balance it all does not look pretty! We hope you enjoy it!

Links:

• MPU Talk
• Do By Friday
• Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books
• Getting Started with Productivityist - Productivityist
• High Performance Planner OFFICIAL
• The Paleo Mom ~ The Paleo Mom
• Full Focus Planner | A planner by Michael Hyatt
• OmniFocus - task management for Mac, iPad, and iPhone - The Omni Group
• How Todoist Works – Features That Power The Best Task Manager
• Music for everyone - Spotify
• Hi there. - Tsh Oxenreider
• Brain.fm: Music to improve focus, meditation & sleep.
• ROMWOD // Optimize your Range of Motion.

“Gratitude is a currency that we can mint for ourselves, and spend without fear of bankruptcy."

With the holidays in full swing around us, gratitude is really top of mind for everyone. Yet, gratitude should not be a seasonal thing, not something that you think about only when the holidays force you to.

As we discuss on the podcast today, there are immense benefits of cultivating gratitude in your life, from more optimism and enthusiasm to physical health and well-being. But what does that look like in real life? Gratitude is totally one of those things that you know you should do, but don’t seem to do.

We share several easy and quick ways that we cultivate gratitude for ourselves, but also how we share this with each other and our children (Lesley even gets emotional over one example!).

How do you cultivate gratitude into your life? What are some of the ways you practice it yourself, or with your partner or family? We’d love to hear - we’re always looking for new ideas!

Links:

• Whitney Hess - Executive Coaching
• Courage and Clarity
• Slow Your Home – Slow right down and live the simpler life you want
• Rawness of Remembering – the unexpected shape
• Amazon.com: The Messy Middle: Finding Your Way Through the Hardest and Most Crucial Part of Any Bold Venture (9780735218079): Scott Belsky: Books
• Full Focus Journal | A journal by Michael Hyatt
• Big Life Journal for kids
• How to Teach Children to Be Grateful (7-Day Gratitude Challenge) – Big Life Journal
• Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books
• Everything You Need to Know About Gratitude (And How It Makes Life Better) – Whole Life Challenge
• Gratitude Chain

Today on the podcast, we talk journaling. If you’re looking at your daily routines and thinking about adding a journaling habit, it can seem really daunting. Today, we break down the why’s and how’s of creating a journaling habit, and we also discuss the benefits that we’ve seen with the introduction of a journaling habit into our lives. 

Links:

• Original Broadway Cast of Hamilton - Hamilton (Original Broadway Cast Recording) Lyrics and Tracklist | Genius
• Jack London - Wikipedia
• Full Focus Journal | A journal by Michael Hyatt
• The Five Minute Journal - Simplest, most effective way to be happier. – Intelligent Change
• Daily Questions Spreadsheet – Marshall Goldsmith
• Day One | Capture life as you live it with the best digital journal for iPhone, iPad, Apple Watch, Mac, and Android.
• Morning Pages | Julia Cameron Live
• Beginner's Guide to Journaling - Michael Hyatt
• High Performance Planner OFFICIAL
• Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books

This month on the podcast, we’re discussing creativity starting with the book Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert.

Do you have room for creativity in your life? Do you allow space for things that make you smile and bring you joy? That brings you beyond the mundane of your life and the roles you encompass into something more?

Links:

• Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear: Elizabeth Gilbert
• Tinker Dabble Doodle Try: Unlock the Power of the Unfocused Mind: Srini Pillay M.D.

Today on the podcast, we round out our discussion of Carol Dweck’s book Mindset by discussing how mindset plays a role at work.

Links:

• Spartan Race Inc. Obstacle Course Races
• Chasing Excellence - Productivity
• The Incomparable | We're the Magnificent Seven (Episode 430)
• MindSet: A Book written by Carol Dweck. Teaching a growth mindset creates motivation and productivity in the worlds of business, education, and sports.
• Simon Sinek - Start With Why
• The Loyalist Team

This week on the podcast, we continue our deep dive discussion of the book Mindset by Carol Dweck with a focus on parenting. We delve into what growth mindset looks like in parenting, what it doesn’t look like, and how to pass on a growth mindset. 

Growth mindset parenting is a little more than “praise the process, not the outcome”. It also isn’t enthusiastically and blindly saying “you can do anything you can put your mind to!” Rather, it looks more like helping your children to find the resources to make progress towards their goals, such as hard work, trying new strategies, and seeking input from others. 

Links:

• Sonos | Wireless Speakers and Home Sound Systems
• Mark Sisson | Mark's Daily Apple
• List of cognitive biases - Wikipedia
• Betty Bunny Wants a Goal by Michael B. Kaplan | Scholastic
• Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear: Elizabeth Gilbert: 9781594634727: Amazon.com: Books