The Modern Journey

HARD MODE DAD with Ollie Harris


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Content warning: this conversation includes discussion of childhood trauma, abuse within the home, alcoholism, drug addiction, family breakdown, homelessness and the emotional weight of parenting through difficult circumstances.


Please listen with care and feel free to pause, skip ahead or stop listening if you need to.


If this conversation brings anything up for you, or if you are worried about someone you know, support is available. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services.


Support resources:

Samaritans: 116 123

NSPCC Helpline: 0808 800 5000

Talk to Frank: https://www.talktofrank.com

Mind: https://www.mind.org.uk


In Episode 3 of Season 2, I sit down with Ollie Harris for one of the most honest and vulnerable conversations we have had on The Modern Journey.


This episode is about fatherhood, childhood trauma, becoming a single dad, growing up around abuse, learning boundaries, raising a child with autism, and trying to break cycles instead of repeating them.


Ollie opens up about becoming a father during Covid, the emotional weight of being separated from his son straight after birth, being forced to take on adult responsibilities too young, and how fatherhood changed the way he sees himself as a man.


We also talk about his son Oscar, autism, labels, emotional capacity, saying no, protecting peace, and what it means to grow through failure.


This episode is for anyone who has had to grow up too quickly, anyone trying to break cycles, and anyone learning that being present is not always easy, but it matters.


Follow Ollie Harris:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/oliver-m-harris-6a0b37134

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/olliej21


Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris


Chapters:

00:00 Content warning

00:35 Preview

01:26 Welcome to Ollie Harris

03:42 What season of life is Ollie in?

11:57 When fatherhood became real

12:19 Becoming a dad during Covid

18:09 How fatherhood changed him as a man

18:51 Boundaries and learning to say no

20:40 Emotional capacity and protecting peace

24:21 Being a single dad

24:49 Growing up around abuse, alcohol and drugs

26:46 Being relied on too young

27:34 Peace and guilt after detaching from family

30:46 Choosing himself and his son

33:49 Finding out who his father was

37:32 Being told the truth through a DNA test

41:52 Protecting himself through distance

43:43 How childhood shaped his fatherhood

44:57 Not becoming what hurt you

46:48 Understanding pain without excusing harm

51:43 Why he apologises so much

55:20 Raising a child with autism

58:03 Hearing his son speak for the first time

01:02:44 Asking himself who he really is

01:05:00 Labels, ADHD and seeing children differently

01:08:28 The beauty of an organic personality

01:14:56 Advice for parents navigating autism

01:17:04 Finding community and trusting the process

01:22:37 What this season requires from him

01:23:15 Growth disguised as failure

01:26:17 Final thoughts


If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.


#TheModernJourney #Fatherhood #TraumaHealing #AutismAwareness #BreakingCycles

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The Modern JourneyBy Hamza Idris