The Modern Journey

What if the thing that helped you succeed is not the thing that can sustain you?

In Episode 5 of Season 2, I sit down with clinical psychologist Dr Matt Slavin for a deep and practical conversation about mental health, high performance, burnout, change, rest, self-awareness and what it really takes to build a life that is sustainable.

Matt returns to The Modern Journey after moving his family from London to New Zealand, and we talk about what that move has taught him about pace, patience, family, health and learning to live with more intention.

We also unpack the shift from “The Burnout Psychologist” to Mental Advantage, and why real transformation is not just about tips, hacks or performance content. It is about understanding yourself, building actual skills, and learning how to change patterns that may have once protected you but no longer serve you.

Matt opens up about why flexibility is a sign of strength, why change often feels worse before it feels better, why rest can feel unsafe for high performers, and why insight alone does not create lasting change.

This episode is for anyone carrying a lot, trying to grow, trying to change, or learning that success without sustainability eventually becomes expensive.

Please note: this conversation is for reflection and education, not a substitute for therapy or professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please speak to a qualified professional or someone you trust.

Follow Dr Matt Slavin:

Website: www.drmattslavin.com

Newsletter: www.drmattslavin.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmattslavin

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drmattslavin/

Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris

Chapters:

00:00 Preview

00:38 Welcome back Dr Matt Slavin

00:58 Moving to New Zealand

03:18 Building a sustainable life

05:39 Why balance comes in seasons

07:19 Flexibility as strength

07:52 From burnout to Mental Advantage

10:04 What Mental Advantage means

11:19 Why performance advice is not enough

13:57 Psychology and high performance

15:54 Old survival techniques

18:28 When success strategies stop sustaining you

20:20 Why change feels uncomfortable

22:47 Rewiring the brain through repetition

24:43 Change inside organisations

27:09 Why rest can feel unsafe

28:22 Noticing old thoughts and patterns

32:39 Why progress is not linear

34:20 Why we need mirrors and support

35:30 Why change feels worse before better

39:48 Fear, excitement and the stories we tell

42:39 Processing after the fact

44:40 What to do if you cannot journal

47:08 Insight is not the same as change

49:29 Insight, behaviour and reflection

50:32 What psychological strength looks like

52:39 Where to start if you are carrying a lot

54:16 Permission to stop and pause

55:09 What life is asking of Matt now

57:38 Choosing family, health and what matters

59:08 Matt’s final encouragement

01:01:41 Final thoughts

If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.

#TheModernJourney #MentalHealth #Burnout #PersonalGrowth #PsychologicalStrength

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What does it take to keep creating before the rewards show up?

In Episode 4 of Season 2, I sit down with Marvellous Michael Anson, solutions architect, filmmaker and author of Firstborn of the Sun, for a conversation about storytelling, discipline, Yoruba mythology, creative identity, publishing, imposter syndrome and what it really takes to build a sustainable creative life.

We talk about writing across deadlines, balancing a full time career with creativity, why stories need to be lived as much as written, and the journey from self publishing to landing a fantasy trilogy with Penguin Michael Joseph.

Marve also opens up about the cultural foundation behind Firstborn of the Sun, the importance of Yoruba oral storytelling, writing for Yoruba readers first, her relationship with her grandmother, the pressure of book two, and why rest matters when you are building something meaningful.

This episode is for anyone trying to create anyway, even when life is busy, the industry is hard, the doubts are loud, and the work still needs to be done.

Follow Marvellous Michael Anson:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/justmarvewrites

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@justmarvewrites

Website: https://www.justmarve.org/home

Preorder Marve’s new book, The Heir of the Shadow:

https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/462761/heir-of-the-shadow-by-anson-marvellous-michael

Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris

Chapters:

00:00 Preview

00:46 Welcome to Marvellous Michael Anson

03:13 Watching TV as a filmmaker

06:03 Congratulations on submitting book two

07:28 Little Marv and the beginning of storytelling

10:30 What kept her faithful to writing

12:45 Wearing many hats

13:05 What balance looks like in real life

16:49 Why life outside writing matters

20:18 From self publishing to Penguin Michael Joseph

21:38 Learning to negotiate creative decisions

24:31 When she felt like an author

26:38 Choosing business school over film school

31:13 What aspiring authors misunderstand

35:57 Discipline behind the writing life

37:37 Firstborn of the Sun

38:44 Yoruba mythology and world building

40:20 Oral storytelling and cultural memory

43:25 Writing for Yoruba readers first

46:19 Reverence, imagination and creative freedom

49:03 When characters surprise you

52:45 Her grandmother’s influence

57:30 What to expect from book two

59:20 The Heir of the Shadow

01:01:45 What makes a story unmistakably Marv’s

01:02:36 Imposter syndrome and the final chapter

01:04:04 Researching fight scenes

01:07:15 What she will protect as a writer

01:08:53 Diversity in publishing

01:11:36 What this season requires from her

01:13:27 Final thoughts

If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.

#TheModernJourney #Writing #Creativity #YorubaMythology #FirstbornOfTheSun

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Content warning: this conversation includes discussion of childhood trauma, abuse within the home, alcoholism, drug addiction, family breakdown, homelessness and the emotional weight of parenting through difficult circumstances.

Please listen with care and feel free to pause, skip ahead or stop listening if you need to.

If this conversation brings anything up for you, or if you are worried about someone you know, support is available. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services.

Support resources:

Samaritans: 116 123

NSPCC Helpline: 0808 800 5000

Talk to Frank: https://www.talktofrank.com

Mind: https://www.mind.org.uk

In Episode 3 of Season 2, I sit down with Ollie Harris for one of the most honest and vulnerable conversations we have had on The Modern Journey.

This episode is about fatherhood, childhood trauma, becoming a single dad, growing up around abuse, learning boundaries, raising a child with autism, and trying to break cycles instead of repeating them.

Ollie opens up about becoming a father during Covid, the emotional weight of being separated from his son straight after birth, being forced to take on adult responsibilities too young, and how fatherhood changed the way he sees himself as a man.

We also talk about his son Oscar, autism, labels, emotional capacity, saying no, protecting peace, and what it means to grow through failure.

This episode is for anyone who has had to grow up too quickly, anyone trying to break cycles, and anyone learning that being present is not always easy, but it matters.

Follow Ollie Harris:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/oliver-m-harris-6a0b37134

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/olliej21

Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris

Chapters:

00:00 Content warning

00:35 Preview

01:26 Welcome to Ollie Harris

03:42 What season of life is Ollie in?

11:57 When fatherhood became real

12:19 Becoming a dad during Covid

18:09 How fatherhood changed him as a man

18:51 Boundaries and learning to say no

20:40 Emotional capacity and protecting peace

24:21 Being a single dad

24:49 Growing up around abuse, alcohol and drugs

26:46 Being relied on too young

27:34 Peace and guilt after detaching from family

30:46 Choosing himself and his son

33:49 Finding out who his father was

37:32 Being told the truth through a DNA test

41:52 Protecting himself through distance

43:43 How childhood shaped his fatherhood

44:57 Not becoming what hurt you

46:48 Understanding pain without excusing harm

51:43 Why he apologises so much

55:20 Raising a child with autism

58:03 Hearing his son speak for the first time

01:02:44 Asking himself who he really is

01:05:00 Labels, ADHD and seeing children differently

01:08:28 The beauty of an organic personality

01:14:56 Advice for parents navigating autism

01:17:04 Finding community and trusting the process

01:22:37 What this season requires from him

01:23:15 Growth disguised as failure

01:26:17 Final thoughts

If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.

#TheModernJourney #Fatherhood #TraumaHealing #AutismAwareness #BreakingCycles

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Success can look like having many gifts, many titles and many open doors.

But what does it look like when God asks you to move before you fully understand the plan?

In Episode 2 of Season 2, I sit down with Patricia Olufemi, also known as NC, for a deeply honest conversation about faith, creativity, obedience, grief, community and what it means to live as a multi-hyphenated child of God.

We talk about music, voice acting, working in tech, moving seasons, starting small, losing her mum, building community, and learning how to keep trusting God when life does not unfold the way you prayed it would.

Patricia opens up about:

• Moving from Ireland to the UK in obedience

• Building a creative life without losing herself

• Starting voice acting under a duvet and in an IKEA cupboard

• Why creatives need to understand the business side

• The cost of being multi-hyphenated

• Grieving her mum while still carrying responsibility

• The power of community, church and honest prayer

• Why this season requires prophetic precision

This episode is for anyone who feels called to more than one thing, anyone navigating grief, and anyone trying to trust God in a season they did not plan.

Follow Patricia Olufemi:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/patriciaolufemi

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ncgrey

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ncgrey

Website: https://stan.store/vocalgoldmine

Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter & Updates: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Follow Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris

Chapters:

00:00 Intro

00:43 Welcome to Patricia Olufemi

01:21 Coming back from America and the meaning of home

02:04 Building community as adults

03:08 Being a multi-hyphenated child of God

04:33 Moving with God in different seasons

06:02 Mourning the life you thought you would have

06:48 Leaving Google and moving in obedience

09:06 The cost of doing many things well

10:31 What could life look like with fewer talents?

12:16 The personal sacrifices behind creativity

14:43 How music first began

16:05 Discovering voice acting during lockdown

18:36 Opening your mind to how God can use your gift

19:23 When one door closes, look around

20:20 Unlearning the need to control the plan

22:17 Starting small in voice acting

23:13 Recording under a duvet

25:04 Voice acting with a stutter

26:25 Resourcefulness and humble beginnings

27:48 Charging less to learn and build experience

30:01 What voice acting gave her that music could not

30:54 Why music can be heartbreaking

32:43 The financial cost of making music

34:38 Being a multi-hyphenated woman

36:50 Staying grounded when life pulls you in many directions

37:32 Losing her mum and moving through grief

38:04 How grief reshaped her understanding of community

40:59 You cannot build community only when you need it

42:10 Learning she cannot do everything alone

44:21 Being honest about grief instead of burying it

47:09 Processing loss as a Christian

48:27 Why stepping away from God was not an option

49:26 What God actually promised

50:51 Holding grief and hope together

55:20 Grieving while still carrying responsibility

56:12 Why workplace grief policies need to change

59:24 Protecting herself in this next chapter

01:01:48 What this season of her journey requires

01:02:01 Prophetic precision

If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.

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Success looks incredible from the outside.

But what does it actually cost?

In this episode, entrepreneur, investor and former Pareto FM founder Andrew Hulbert opens up about the reality of entrepreneurship, leadership, burnout, business growth and balancing success with family life.

We talk about building a £50M business, the pressure of ambition, reconnecting with relationships after years of hustle, and what happens when the thing you spent years chasing finally arrives.

This is one of the most honest conversations I’ve had on The Modern Journey.

Andrew opens up about:

• Sacrificing time with family while building his company  

• Reconnecting with friendships after years of hustle  

• Why being present matters more than status  

• Leadership, vulnerability and building high performing teams  

• Fatherhood, success and raising grounded children  

• The future of Facilities Management and modern leadership  

• Why volunteering and relationships matter more than networking tactics  

This episode is for anyone chasing something big while trying not to lose themselves in the process.

⸻

Follow Andrew Hulbert:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrewhulbert

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_andrewhulbert

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hulbertandrew

Tomorrow Meets Today: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tomorrow-meets-today/

Follow The Modern Journey:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/modernjourneyhq

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@modernjourneyhq

Newsletter & Updates: https://modernjourneyhq.com

Follow Hamza Idris on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/hamzaidris

⸻

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro  

01:09 Buying a nature reserve for his children  

05:02 Building a £50M business  

06:03 Why success stopped mattering  

09:35 The season of life Andrew is in now  

12:09 Learning to be present again  

14:34 What ambition gave him  

17:34 What ambition took away  

20:34 The real cost of success  

23:33 Rebuilding friendships after business success  

27:36 Why men need to talk more  

28:22 When a business becomes bigger than you  

30:24 Did he actually enjoy the lifestyle?  

33:18 Fatherhood and raising grounded children  

40:27 The danger of instant gratification  

41:44 What people misunderstand about leadership  

47:20 Why volunteering changed his career  

52:34 What Facilities Management actually is  

54:40 The future of the FM industry  

59:54 Why young people should consider FM  

01:02:17 Building teams with 100% retention  

01:08:23 Why diversity in leadership matters  

01:12:35 Succession planning and leadership ego  

01:17:19 Advice for ambitious young people  

01:23:50 What this season of life requires from him  

01:24:48 Final reflections  

Let us know your biggest takeaway in the comments.

If this conversation resonates with you, follow The Modern Journey and share the episode with someone who needs to hear it.

#TheModernJourney #Leadership #Entrepreneurship #Fatherhood #Success

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You do not always get to feel ready before it is time to begin.

In this Monday Diary, Hamza reflects on what it means to move while still feeling pressure, nerves, and uncertainty. With the live event this week, the podcast launch next week, and a recent career transition of his own, he explores the truth that readiness is often a moving target.

This episode is about courage, perfectionism, overthinking, and learning to move before you feel fully impressive.

Weekly question:

What are you delaying because you think you need to feel more ready first?

For deeper reflections and behind the scenes updates, sign up at modernjourneyhq.com.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, Hamza reflects on a hard truth he had to learn about himself: sometimes the desire for love, closeness, and connection can make discernment blurry.

Not just in romance, but in friendship, community, and life, emotional hunger can make almost anything that looks like comfort feel convincing.

In this Monday Diary, he explores what it means to give people access before trust has been built, how survival mode can distort your choices, and why healthy love changes your definition of connection.

Weekly question: Where in your life have you been giving access before trust has actually been built?

For deeper reflections and behind the scenes updates, sign up at modernjourneyhq.com.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Starting over reveals more than it changes. It shows you who you are when the familiar disappears.

In this Monday Diary, I reflect on moving from Nigeria to the UK at 17 and what that transition taught me about identity, courage, community, coping, and growth.

What looked like independence on the outside was, in many ways, survival in real time. A new country. A new system. A new rhythm. And in the middle of it, lessons I did not fully understand until much later.

In this episode, I share five honest things starting over taught me about myself:

• I’m more adaptable than I thought

• Community is not a luxury, it’s a need

• Capability is not enough without wisdom

• I was braver than I gave myself credit for

• If I don’t choose healthy ways to cope, I will drift toward whatever is available

This is a personal reflection on what change exposes, what survival can hide, and why telling yourself the truth matters when life shifts.

Weekly question: What has starting over taught you about yourself?

For deeper reflection and behind the scenes updates, sign up to the newsletter at modernjourneyhq.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the first Monday Diary of the new season.

In this episode, I’m opening a new chapter of The Modern Journey and sharing why I wanted to create space for these diary style reflections alongside the main conversations.

This season is not just about polished answers or big ideas. It is about honesty, growth, faith, identity, discipline, healing, and what it means to become more whole in real life.

These Monday Diaries are a place for real time reflection. The lessons I’m learning, the questions I’m sitting with, and the kind of inner work that often happens quietly before anything changes publicly.

If you’ve been navigating change, trying to stay grounded, or figuring out who you are becoming in this season, this one is for you.

The Modern Journey is a podcast about the human experience, with honest conversations on growth, identity, and modern life.

Follow the podcast and join the journey at modernjourneyhq.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

“This season wasn’t about having answers. It was about asking better questions.”

Every season deserves reflection.

In this final episode of Season One, Hamza Idris is interviewed by his wife, Davina Oriakhi‑Idris, in an honest, unfiltered wrap-up of the journey so far.

Together, they reflect on the conversations, the lessons, the growth, and the tension behind the scenes of building The Modern Man Podcast while navigating work, faith, marriage, leadership, and personal responsibility.

This is not a highlight reel.

It’s a debrief.

A mirror.

And a moment of gratitude and grounding before what comes next.

This episode is for anyone who has followed the season, supported quietly, or is curious about the heart behind the platform.

🔑 What you’ll take from this episode:

• Why Season One needed to exist

• The unexpected lessons from the guests

• What challenged Hamza the most personally

• Balancing ambition, faith, marriage, and rest

• Where ego showed up and where humility was required

• What Season Two will build on, not repeat

⏱️ Episode Chapters

00:00 Why a Season One wrap-up mattered

02:10 Introducing Davina and switching roles

05:40 How The Modern Man Podcast was conceived

11:30 The original vision and early resistance

17:20 Lessons that emerged across the season

23:40 Conversations that challenged Hamza the most

30:10 Masculinity, responsibility, and emotional honesty

37:50 Faith, grounding, and staying aligned under pressure

46:30 Marriage, support, and building alongside your spouse

55:10 Burnout, capacity, and learning to slow down

1:04:20 Creative doubt, discipline, and consistency

1:13:00 How Season One changed Hamza personally

1:22:40 Gratitude for guests, listeners, and community

1:30:30 What Season Two will build on

1:38:50 Advice to men walking a similar path

1:46:10 Final reflections and closing the season

📌 Mentioned in this Episode

🎶 Check out Preyé’s music:

⁠Preyé’s Live Show⁠: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQG4A9qb4nA&ab_channel=Prey%C3%A9

⁠Preyé on Spotify⁠: https://open.spotify.com/artist/6dbTmlL5brq9B2fkUj2MQD?si=ahRPMnYVRkeBCZPCF7-7gQ

🎧 Listen & Subscribe

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-modern-man-podcast/id1784333559

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4v7TSM63Rhmdd4GxpUlIEa

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@modernjourneyhq?sub_confirmation=1

Website: http://www.tmmpodcast.com

🎙️ About The Modern Man Podcast

Honest conversations about masculinity, mental health, work, faith, and the human experience.

Less noise. More truth.

#modernmanpodcast #seasonfinale #reflection #modernmasculinity #faithandlife #growthjourney #marriageandpurpose #menswork

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