Life is generally a place where unusual things happen to anyone and one of those tendencies is for a lady who was engaged to her man and after a while changed his mind over the eventual marriage with her. This could happen to anybody and we must understand what to do in such a situation.

I have heard stories of many ladies in this situation and they consider it a spiritual problem and many say it is the worst kind of heartbreak after you have had the ring on for a while and having your mind prepared for a wedding. What are the reasons for such to happen?

1. He probably got new information about you that he could not go ahead with. 

2. He realized he was not ready for marriage and his friends forced him to do it.

3. You probably pressured him to do a proposal. 

4. He realized a new behaviour about you that he is not ready to accept. 

5. You stop pretending and showing what you are. 

6. His mother or family does not want you because of where you are coming from.
7. Your genotype does not work together. 

8. And many more.

Whatever reason this may happen, as a lady, you must first see the good side of the situation and begin an inner dialogue to recreate yourself before the situation defines your self worth. This is a general rule I believe one must deploy whenever they get disappointed. Going forward, accept this has happened and take out some time to grief, shed the emotions, the pain, the feelings, don’t hold back the natural reactions of your hearts toward such a situation. Listen to your pain, don’t blame them because that will take your eyes from the source. The source of your pain may not be the object of your disappointment but coming from the frustrations of what people may say, your reputations or your image before the eyes of the world.

Your pain is amplified when you have a wrong reason to feel pain. Pain with a wrong purpose will elongate the pain. Listen to your pain, identify the source and maintain your self worth.

After you are able to get yourself back, kindly pick the lessons from the situation. While you pick the lessons, here are some things you should know.

1. You could have married him and regret all your life. 

2. He loved you so much to leave you to someone who will love you better. 

3. Pay attention to growing beyond the opinion of people.

4. Share your lessons with friends who will strengthen you. 

5. Don't feel guilty about yourself. 

6. Stop the comparison. You are different and you have a unique story. 

Lastly, when you decide to date a guy, you have opened yourself to a level of love and pain, when you decide to go into courtship with this person, you have further opened yourself to a level of love and pain, when you decide to say yes to a proposal of marriage, you have decided to further increase the level of love and pain. We must learn to accept pain when it comes because we made the choices earlier. The fact he did not get married to you after the proposal is painful but it is a strategic pain you should always anticipate. You don't put your money in the bank and believe nothing can happen to it.