Healthy At Any Size

Many of us fall victim to the “all or nothing” mentality when it comes to our efforts to lose weight, or get healthy. As someone in recovery from perfectionism, from multiple back surgeries, from an eating disorder, and from subscribing to other people’s standards for my body, this is something I’ve had a great deal of personal experience with.

If you had asked me 10 years ago if I was a perfectionist, I probably would have said, “fuck no.” I didn’t see myself as a perfectionist because I thought that being a perfectionist means that you are perfect. But I began to slowly recognize the ways that I was sabotaging my own success by holding myself to incredibly high standards.

In this episode I share my own personal journey to acknowledge, and overcome, my own perfectionism. I’ve learned how to harness my tendency to set really aggressive goals, and hold myself to a very high standard. Now, it’s your turn!

Key takeaways:

* Episode 002, with Robyn Downs, brought up this topic and is an excellent primer for this topic!
* Trying too hard to do things perfectly means you sometimes don’t do them at all
* Perfectionists aren’t necessarily people that are “perfect”
* Unrealistic standards of body “perfection” are perfectionist kryptonite
* The hard fall from “badass” female athlete to a gimp recovering from back surgery
* The start / stop, perfectionist method to recovering from multiple back surgeries (not recommended)
* The nasty things we tell ourselves when we don’t attain perfection
* Internalizing “failure” to achieve perfect standards robs you of the chance to make gradual improvement
* Experimentation and failing forward are key to creating a life, a routine, and an experience that feels good to you
* Perfection doesn’t enable your success, it can actually hinder it!
* How I’ve managed to harness my perfectionist tendencies to create positive change

Mentioned in this episode:

Healthy at Any Size podcast Episode 002

Robyn Downs, of Real Food Whole Life and The Feel Good Effect

My history with eating disorders

My recovery from multiple back surgeries

Gouveia International Talent Management

Share the Body Love!

Share what you learned here via Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or Twitter

Subscribe on iTunes and leave a review. I love hearing what you have to say!

Post your own experiences, thoughts, and feedback to social media using the hashtag #healthyatanysize!

Subscribe on iTunes and leave a review. I love hearing what you have to say!

Post your own experiences, thoughts, and feedback to social media using the hashtag #healthyatanysize!

Robyn Downs is the researcher, educator, storyteller and mama behind her blog, Real Food Whole Life and The Feel Good Effect podcast!

She is a working mom and a woman in the real world who is trying to balance the demands of her life with creating a healthy lifestyle for herself and her family.

In this episode, Robyn shares her own personal journey to creating this healthy balance. She encourages us all to examine our goals in a different way, to let go of perfectionism, and to infuse all of our self-improvement efforts with an oft-overlooked success factor: self-compassion!

Key takeaways:

• Robyn’s journey to a healthy pregnancy, and getting healthy during early mom life
• By walking away from something, you give yourself the space to say yes to something else
• Taking those small steps builds momentum to be able to say, “this isn’t serving me anymore”
• The two main challenges for women trying to live a healthy lifestyle
• Moving away from someone else’s prescriptive plan of perfection
• Setting incremental goals as opposed to always aiming for perfection
• Living with that shame spiral and guilt of not being able to achieve “perfection” 
• Self-compassion as jet fuel for your transformation
• Changing your mindset so that you can actually be happy right now!
• Modeling the behavior we want our children to exhibit when it comes to how we talk about our bodies
• Cutting ourselves off from any influences (magazines, social media, etc.) that feed our negative self-perception

Mentioned in this episode:

Real Food Whole Life

The Feel Good Effect

How to Create a Wellness Routine (with Goal Setting Activity)

Share the Body Love!

Share what you learned here via Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or Twitter

Subscribe on iTunes and leave a review. I love hearing what you have to say!

Post your own experiences, thoughts, and feedback to social media using the hashtag #healthyatanysize!

Most of my life I’ve been a “serial dieter.” I went on my first diet when I was 7 years old. From that time, I was concerned about food, my body and my weight. I’ve spent thousand of dollars on dieting and, most tragically, I’ve deprived myself of life experiences.

Two nights before my wedding I had, what I call, my “bathtub moment.” This was an epiphany that transformed the way I viewed my body, and it changed my world.

As I was taking a bath that night, I had this overwhelming feeling of worthlessness. I imagined being in my wedding gown, overweight, ugly and standing in front of all my closest friends and family.

After a flood of negative self-talk, I had a moment of clarity. I realized all the hype about dieting, toning, losing weight and having perfection was not real. Fixating on having a perfect body was robbing me of so much joy. Why was I letting this obsession get in the way of living a full, purposeful life?

Three months after my “bathtub moment,” I signed my New York modeling contract. I decided to accept, embrace and love my body. That decision changed my life. It was finally okay to be happy, ambitious and excel in my life.

In recent years, Dove has conducted studies revealing 85% of women and 79% of girls are opting out of life experiences because they are self-conscious about their bodies. I believe this is a crisis. It’s been proven through many studies that when women are contributing to society, everything improves. I can’t be idle when the world needs confident women.

I don’t think we need to stop improving our bodies, and I am not saying losing weight is bad. All I am saying is it is time to transform the way we think and feel about our bodies. If we change the way we feel about our bodies, we are capable of transforming any aspect of our life.

I am passionate about sharing the truth I’ve discovered; the truth that we don’t have to change our bodies to be happy. Today is the first episode of Healthy at any Size. It will be the first of many, and together we can start a body revolution by choosing to embrace the beautiful, organic bodies we have.

I am excited  to be able to share this podcast with you, I hope you will embark on the journey of finding happiness in the body you have now. You can also join the conversation on Twitter, @melparrishplus, find us on Body Love TV and, of course, join us here at melparrish.com next week.

Key takeaways:

[:11] You deserve to live a happy healthy life.

[2:32] The secret to loving your body is changing how you feel about your body.

[3:05] Melinda Parrish introduction.

[4:25] It is time for a revolution. It is time to stop letting the way we feel about our body hold us back.

[6:14] Stop fixating on having a perfect body.

[7:23] Healthy at any Size was born from Body Love TV, it was built from the desire to dig deeper into some of the conversations we were having.

[8:20] How many of you have put something off “until you lose the weight”?

[10:19] Being happy with your body does not mean not taking care of your body. The changes you want to make must start with you loving your body.

[13:14] You can live a healthy lifestyle without focusing on weight loss.

[13:35] Any kind of transformation (including weight loss) must start with self-love.

[15:04] Review of the cycle of deprivation, dieting, binging, weight gain, and spending money on dieting.

[17:39] The transformation in how I viewed my body happend two nights before my wedding.

[20:29] The decision to accept, embrace, and love my body.

[22:42] Shift your focus to helping others and fulfill your purpose in life.

[24:58] We deserve to be in love with our bodies!

[27:19] You get the choice to contribute to the crisis or contribute to the solution.

Mentioned in this episode:

Melinda Parrish

@melparrishplus

Body Love TV

Dove

Dove Body Image Research

National Eating Disorders Association

Confessions of a Recovering Fat Kid