In this episode of Filter Optional, Chico and Shannon West unpack what it really means to have healthy friendships—and why most people are asking the wrong question.

Instead of labeling people as “good” or “bad,” they challenge listeners to shift their mindset toward something more practical: Is this relationship healthy or unhealthy for me?

Through real-life examples—from girls trips and group texts to birthday expectations and social pressure—they explore how codependency, people-pleasing, and fear of judgment quietly shape adult friendships .

If you’ve ever felt anxious in a group dynamic, struggled to set boundaries, or questioned whether your friendships are truly supportive, this episode offers clarity and language to help you navigate it

Key Points

Why labeling people as “good or bad” creates judgment and disconnection

The shift to thinking in terms of healthy vs. unhealthy relationships

How codependency and people-pleasing show up in friendships

The importance of boundaries—and what happens when they aren’t respected

Understanding friends for a reason, season, or lifetime

Why group dynamics can create anxiety, pressure, and insecurity

How to recognize if a relationship allows you to be seen, heard, and respected

Takeaway

You can’t control other people—but you can control your boundaries. When you stop labeling relationships as good or bad and start asking what’s healthy for you, everything becomes clearer.