This conversation with Zoe Hollingsworth from Creative Geelong explores our connection to the swinging pendulum of social media. Her in depth wisdom and quick humour alights the conversation as explores her connections to herself, others & All That Is.

[2:09] Having Fun a Way to Connect

[3:05] My Learning Curve of Connecting to Emotions

[5:15] Connecting to Acceptance of My Vulnerability

[7:48] Video Coaching – Acceptance of Self

[10:51] Swinging pendulum of Social Media

[14:23] Social Media’s Impact on Mental Health

[17:36] A Connection in the Disconnection

[23:32] Social Media Detox and Connection

[29:12] Connecting to a Flow-State

Sean Purcell is one of luckiest man to be alive after 10 isolated but mini incidences all aligned up. During a run on a Torquay beach, his heart stopped and if it wasn’t for the care of 10 people who kept his heart beating we would not be here today to tell his story. It changed his life.

[0:43] Clinically Dead on Torquay Beach

[3:30] Such Gratefulness for Each Day since my Death

[4:29] Taking Life for Granted Before Dying

[6:17] Being More Connected to Myself

[8:47] Each Connection to Others is a Daily Blessing

[10:12] Second Shot at Life has improved my Connection to Others

[12:58] We Men Need to Park Our Egos

[14:30] Men’s Ego Blocks Our Connections

[16:13] Connecting to our Vulnerability

[16:39] My Deepest Connection to My Vulnerability - Dying

[18:32] Being Looked After by Entity Beyond

[21:09] My Ego Resistance blocks my Flow-State

Lee Stamps (Stampsy) is a drive announcer of the departure lounge on K rock. She is also the music director for the Grant Broadcasters network. This is her conversation on her journey in radio and connection to herself.

[1:50] My Connections to Sport

[3:40] Making a Difference to Just One Person

[8:21] My Journey of Becoming More Self Connected

[12:00] Being okay to Connect with my Vulnerability

[13:52] Growing in the Heart of Trust

[17:53] Connection through Deeply Listening

[23:21] Managing Our Bodies Energy Reserves

[25:26] My Flow-State Lets Go of Negativity

[26:09] Deep Love Connection to My Nephews

[28:35] No Words can describe my Nephew’s Love

[29:24] Deepening My Connections

[31:39] Connection to ‘All That Is’ ~ More Conscious Decisions

[32:33] Finding Connection to My True Self

Connecting to Our Wellness

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Jo Surkitt from Revitalize Lifestyle to the World Heart of Connection podcast. Jo is a wellness educator, keynote speaker, and practitioner who specializes in creating positive change and healthy choices in the lives of people from all walks of life. Jo has worked with many business organisations and individuals over the past two decades in the areas of professional personal development, health and well-being mindfulness, positive psychology, resilience, emotional intelligence, where she inspires, motivates, educates, and assist clients in improving their overall happiness and well-being at home and at work. Welcome, Jo.

Jo [0:38] Hi Mark, thanks for having me today.

Mark [0:40] Jo, just by way of introduction have I touch base with everything that I need to have touched base with?

Jo [0:50] Yes sounds great thank you.

Connection to Breath “Only This ~ In this Moment”

Mark [0:54] In terms of connection – the connection to Self, Other and ‘All That Is’ how does that work for you?

Jo [1:03] With self, I found over the years a good way to connect with me is just my breath.  The just coming back to that moment.  I often sort of say to myself, “only this ~ in this moment”, because we have such busy lives, and it’s lots of things to be done.  And sometimes when I’m feeling overwhelmed, I’ll just sort of repeat “only this ~ in this moment”, and it sort of brings me back to just concentrating on that present time or that present moment, rather than trying to do so many things and coming back to that breath.  So of just noticing that if we just come back to the breath it’ll bring us back.  You know calms our mind, calms our heart, calms our well-being.

Mark [1:41] It is a busy world, isn’t it? Sure is.  It’s gotten busier.  Thanks to the digital world.

Jo [1:47] Yes, it’s supposed to be making us more connected, but unfortunately, a lot of the time makes us more disconnected to others and ourselves.

Noticing the impacts of my Disconnection

Mark [1:57] What do you notice when you disconnected from yourself?

Jo [2:00] I find my mind gets quite erratic and there are so many thoughts and I just feel like I’m being pulled.  You know, pillar to post, whether it is family work, even my own mind, and my thoughts.  So I just start feeling a little bit edgy and often what I’ll do is go down to the beach, take a walk along the beach. Just sort of take my shoes off and just really connect back to nature and just bring myself back to me.  And it just – anyone that walks along the beach or in the ocean can feel it their mind calms so much.  Which now they actually say there’s scientific research saying that the being near the positive and also the negative ions coming off the ocean, they actually reduce your cortisol by 50% for the next 24 to 48 hours.  So scientifically research saying go, they need the water.

Connecting to the Ocean

Mark [2:48] And being near the water is important and also being in nature?

Jo [2:51] Being in nature whether it’s going to hug a tree or you’re going for a swim in the river or anything in the ocean.

Mark [2:58] They say that nature somehow triggers our serotonin a stomach. It’s quite fascinating.

Jo [3:03] Yes, that whole mind and gut thing – it’s amazing the access now of how it’s related so closely.

Noticing my Connection to My Body

Mark [3:10] When you are getting stressed, you notice whereabouts – do you have a certain point in your body as you’re checking in with your body – your connection to your body.  Do you notice is there a holding pattern within your body?  Are there certain points in your body where you know ‘aha’ – there is again?

Jo [3:26] Yeah, I feel it sort of in my chest area.  Years ago I used to feel it more in my gut area.  But I’m very conscious

Geelong Business Connect with its Community

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Ben Flynn to the Heart of Connection Podcast.  Ben is the CEO of the Geelong Chamber of Commerce and has a background in marketing, accounting, and finance and has worked in many places across the world.  And most recently here at Gen U in Geelong.  He lives in Ocean Grove, with his wife and two kids. Ben and I have a bit of a connection together being old Hamiltonians from that wonderful little place in the southwest.  Is that right? We call it southwest of Victoria or Western District?

Connection to Hamilton

Ben [0:34] Yeah, the Merino Capital of the World – Wool Capital of the world we had on the sign as you drove in.

Mark [0:40] That’s right and one of the Prime Minister’s was not far from Hamilton?

Ben [0:47] Malcolm Fraser was from Merino.  Steve, not Steve Brack’s was it Steve Brack’s – one of the Premier was from Coleraine as well – John Brumby.

Growing up in the Western District

Mark [1:01] Okay I didn’t know that.  The old Western District – we’ve got some good football is too.  We got the boy Jeremy Cameron up in Sydney with Greater Sydney he’s from Dartmoor or Coleraine somewhere like that.  Also Phillip Walsh former coach of Adelaide.  He was St. Mary’s boys.

Ben [1:22] We knew Phil Walsh really well in the family. There are other names Billy Picken came out of there.  He’s one of the notables.  So it’s got a pretty good sporting history down.

Mark [1:36] It has.

Ben [1:37] There’s not much to do in town actually.

Country Towns strong Sporting Communities

Mark [1:39] Play football.  If you weren’t an ‘A’ grade footballer or ‘A’ grade cricketer.  If you played another sport, it wasn’t the ideal thing to do.

Ben [1:46] Yeah, I think there might have been a marching band or something for those people (Laughter).

Mark [1:51] March you out of town.  So thank you, Ben, for being a guest on the podcast.  This podcast is about a conversation for about 30 minutes roughly.  It is on connection to Self, Others and ‘All That Is’ and whatever that all that is is to you.  It could be a God, it could be the trees, the ocean could be the universe, it doesn’t matter – it is what it is.  In terms of connection, how did you get connected to marketing and accounting?  What led you to that connection?

Respected Teacher-led me to Accounting

Ben [2:24] Wow.  Accounting was my Year 12 school teacher. He was my accounting teacher who had a lot of respect for.  I went into University here at Deakin and actually from Hamilton.  I did commerce arts and always lead to accounting.  I was lucky enough after university to be one of the few graduates that’s able to go into one of the big four firms.  I and went into KPMG.  Like a lot of people around the age of 24 & 25 years after a few years working.  The urge to go overseas was too strong.  Or more the point that I was getting emails every morning from mates overseas having a very good time.  So I packed up my backpack and started on sort of six years overseas and as part of that journey, I was in London.  In London, I fell into marketing and for me, that was a breath of fresh air it – I suppose suited my personality better and really enjoyed that.  This took me around the world and also took me – brought me back to Geelong and probably was largely responsible for me being here sitting next year speaking today.

My Connection to Marketing 101

Mark [3:38] The connection to marketing.  What is it in marketing that drew you to it?  What’s the connection there? What do you like about it?

Ben [3:49] I think connections the big key.  I’ve always enjoyed meeting people.  As

Connecting to & Embracing Adoption 

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Anne Janev to the World Heart of Connection today.  Annie’s a long term Geelong (ite).  She lived in and was born and raised in Geelong.  Moved away for about 12 months but loved Geelong so much it was home and she came back.  Today I’d like to welcome you to the World Heart of Connection podcast. I look forward to having a conversation with you about the connection to Self, Others and ‘All That Is.’  Where do we start Annie – how do you – the connection to Geelong sounds like – you to move away for 12 months and then come back. That to me sounds like there’s some connection to home.

Connecting to Geelong My Home

Anne [0:43] Yeah, there is absolutely.  We moved to Queensland when Chloe was five weeks old, my oldest. My father passed away while we were up there.  I came back to see Mum and obviously for the funeral and so forth.  I bought Chloe with me and decided I wanted to stay here.  So said to the hubby who was still up there come back you know. So yeah I wanted to be with family,  miss my friends and there are areas in Geelong that I drive through and I just love being in.  So I missed all that.

Mark [1:22] What are some of those areas can you?

Anne [1:24] Newtown.  I was brought up in Newtown.  So it still gives me a sense of – just a lovely feeling when I drive through there.  Yeah.  Going through and past kids’ houses that I played in when I was a kid.  Obviously Mum and Dad’s house, I take the grandchildren to pass there often.  Different walks.  There are lots of areas that are like in Geelong.  I like East Geelong.  There are some areas that I feel a little bit oppressed in and I don’t know why but these areas I stay away from.

Connecting to the Nostalgic Nature of Geelong

Mark [2:04] So that’s the connection for you.  Their long term connections.  When you have those memories as you’re walking down past the old home – can you describe what the connections like in your body and in your being?

Anne [2:23] Yeah, it’s fuzzy. In my body, it would be just a warm feeling nostalgic.  Yeah, it’s a really nice feeling because I was secure, I think.

Mark [2:43] When we talk about connection, that’s a part of the connection, isn’t it?  What you’ve just shared?

Anne [2:50] Yes.

Connecting to My Family of 5 Children

Mark [2:52] You’ve got five children – connection to children pretty powerful?

Anne [3:00] Exactly yeah.

Anne [3:06] As an adopted child myself, I think I’ve realized that love isn’t everything for me.  A lot of it has been trusted. So my big thing with my kids was for them to trust me and for them to feel secure.

Anne [3:11] Because I guess I just sort of felt at times that I’ve missed out on that – right in the very beginning.  So, yeah.  So I try to connect with that – as when I was small, my big thing was making them feel secure.  Even if things weren’t good at home, I’d try and smile all the time.   Because I didn’t want them to think anything was wrong.  So that’s been a big thing with me making them feel secure.

Making My Children Safe & Secure

Mark [4:05] Making them feel secure – did that help you in your connections?

Anne [4:14] Yes. Sometimes I think – feelings are really funny because we think we’ve got through things and then, of course, something rears its head again.  Yeah, it’s tricky, it’s very confusing.

Mark [4:37] It’s really interesting when you just said that something rears its head again.  It’s like – that’s the hard part of being sort of human sometimes, do know what I mean? Oh, here it is again and I wonder

Connecting to My True Self

Mark [0:00] Welcome Roxie Bennett to the Heart of Connection Podcast.  I’ve known Roxy for many years we go way back to the Warrnambool Institute days before it was called Deakin.

Roxie [0:09] I know. It’s such a long time ago.

Mark [0:12] It is – isn’t it, how time flies.

Old Connections

Roxie [0:15] Well, it’s really weird Mark because I sort of think about that time  – it feels like just like a split second in my life now when I think back to it.  But it was pretty amazing, I was only there with you for a year. There was a pretty amazing year.

Mark [0:33] It was the last of the free education.

Roxie [0:35] It was indeed.

Mark [0:39] So since then Roxie has gone on to become self-employed with Roxy Bennett’s Life Changer. She also works as many people probably know with Bay FM as a radio announcer.  She’s here today to have a conversation with me about her Heart of Connection to Self, Others and ‘All That Is.’

Roxie [0:58] It is so lovely to be here Mark it really is, I’m loving it.

Connecting to my Transformation Year

Mark [1:02] Great.  In terms of connecting to Self – how do – what’s your process?  How do you connect to Roxie?

Roxie [1:12] Look I think up until probably this year I didn’t do it terribly well, to be honest.  I’ve gone through a bit of a transformation this year.  This has seen me lose a lot of weight become a lot healthier, get a lot more active and various other things.  But probably more important than all of that – it probably has seen me really connect to myself and to who I am.  Interestingly enough, in doing that it’s actually opened up – it’s like a door has been opened.  I don’t know about the universe but a doors been open that all these amazing people are walking through you being one.  I hadn’t seen you for ages, like years.  And various other people though, it’s almost like, by me connecting to who I am and my true self – actually opened me up for others to connect with me, if that makes sense.

Mark [2:19] Makes sense.

Roxie [2:20] So I don’t know why – I don’t know how that works.  But I suppose that that’s what happens.  I guess that me really connecting to me has – it’s not an easy process and it hasn’t been necessarily a pretty process at times.  I think a lot of it be worked around acceptance of who I am and learning to love myself, which I am not sure I ever really did.   Some people would be surprised that because I think somebody like me, would have a pretty healthy robust ego and would have quite a bit of self-love.  Not that those two necessarily go together.  But I don’t think I did and I don’t think I have for pretty much my whole life, until now.

Connecting to all Our Personality Traits

Mark [3:12] Connecting to our full self not easy because there are positive personality traits and there’s also l not so positive personality traits that are all I think designed to self-preserve that fragile sense of self.  Connecting to the hard parts of us, we always want to disconnect from them.  What have you noticed that you have been connecting some of the bits that you’ve wanted to avoid in the past?

Roxie [3:44] Yeah, I think that’s absolutely right.  Part of connecting to me, I had to accept some of the attitudes, behaviors, thoughts, beliefs that I had – that weren’t very nice.   It was about acknowledging that at times that I could actually be not a very nice person.   I think we all have that – we all do.  Look I’m not Mother Teresa trust me, I’m not.  What I realized in acknowledging that side of myself was that I had to choose the way that I was to live moving forward. 

Connecting to our Community

Mark [0:00] I’d like to introduce Martin Duke to the Heart of Connection podcast.  Martin is a councillor with the Surf Coast Shire.  He has been councilor for now for nearly three years and enjoys every moment of it.  He’s been with the CFA, the Country Fire Association for the past 20 years in his 29 years, I mean.  He is actively engaged and connected to our community.  He teaches at Deakin University and is interested in the mental health of our community.   I’d like to welcome you and thank you for taking the time to come in and have a conversation about Heart of Connection to Self, Others and ‘All That Is.’

Martin [0:33] Thanks, Mark.  Thank you for inviting me along.  It’s a pleasure to come along and talk about what I do and I don’t mind talking a bit.  I like to get out there and talk to people and hopefully help people along the way.

Enjoying Connections with People

Mark [0:49] Can you talk about what do you enjoy about connections to people?

Martin [0:55] I think it’s one of my big things is, I’m quite a social person.  I do connect to a lot of people as I go around.  I enjoy the company of other people.  I enjoy the company of men, but I enjoy the company of it in social and also just small quieter times with people.  We can have situations where we’re talking about – a few cars and car club we meet once a month then at either a restaurant in Torquay or coffee shop.  It is a Sunday morning drive for us as we get out because a lot of us got classic cars or just old cars want to talk about.  It’s a good way for men to stop, sit and talk. They have a bit of breakfast, coffee, might go for a cruise together afterward or head on back their families do what they’re going to do.  At least for that little breakaway.

Mark [1:46] Men and connection – that’s an interesting subject that men, not that engaged sometimes. They’re not that connected to themselves?

Men and Connection are they connected to themselves?

Martin [1:59] Well, the numbers tell us what is happening out there with the men.  More men having – are committing suicide, or will actually successful suicide.  More women are committing it, but they’re not as successful because they’ve actually been talking to somebody before.  The men are a lot more violent with it and they do it.  They’re not talking and nobody’s aware of what’s going on inside them.  We need to have that conversation.  We need to talk to our friends out there.  I was talking to a mental health thing on Saturday, which was Arts and Mines down at Surf Coast, and I spoke in front of a crowd of 120 people.  I had quite a number of the men’s coming up to me afterward yeah, let’s have that conversation and we’ll talk about it.  I said it’s about that conversation, it’s about living the time.  Even if it’s just for a walk along the beach, chatting about it.  Stop for coffee at one of the little places there or just even just to drink the water and just the chat.  Just break up their day and take away from maybe the dark thoughts or thoughts that are actually encouraged him to go along with the direction of what to do.   I may be having really great things and we just maybe we need to encourage as well.  It’s not only the negatives people we need to look at, but we also need to look at the positives and encourage those positives.  So hey, that’s great.  What are you doing? This is great that you’re doing that and I look forward to those moments.

Men’s Social Conditioning Is Very Questionable

Mark [3:21] What do you think has prevented men over the years from establishing that connection to themselves and being able to ta

Connecting to All of Me

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Nicole Scott to the Heart of Connection Podcast.  Nicole is a mental health advocate with Headspace and has found that the best way to connect to herself is by giving to others.  Nicole has found a deep connection to this and it lights her world up.  Nicole is studying life coaching with the Life Coaching Institute in Melbourne and is soon to be moving into a Social Work degree studying at Deakin. So welcome Nicole.  Welcome to the Heart of Connection podcast to Self, Others & ‘All That Is’.  Just by way of introduction have I covered the introductory – your introduction well enough?  Is there bits I’ve missed?

Nicole [0:43] No you’ve pretty much summed it up really well.

Mark [0:46] Great, well done.  Now Nicole the connection to self.   How does Nicole connect to herself?  What’s it like connecting to Nicole?

Connecting to Myself by Sitting with & letting be

Nicole [0:58] I guess connecting to Nicole is making the time to sit down with myself and any thoughts or feelings that come up, just let them be and let them pass through.  Yeah and just allowing myself to really connect with what’s going on with me.

Mark [1:21] There are some lovely thoughts and feelings inside ourselves that we all want to connect to.  That’s the feel-good side.  But then also there’s the unfortunate part of our humankind is the connection to parts of ourselves that aren’t so great.  The sadness, the pain, disappointment, loss, and grief there’s a whole range of emotions in there and feeling states.

Connecting to my positive & negative

Nicole [1:47] Yeah, there’s a lot there as well.

Mark [1:49] Yeah and I think connecting to ourselves is – how do we learn to traverse the landscape, that emotional landscape?

Nicole [1:58] Yeah, definitely. Absolutely.

Mark [2:00] As you’ve journeyed through what’s it like now for your journey to be able to connect to some of those emotional states or feeling states or thinking states that aren’t so great?

Connecting to the ‘Comfort within my Discomfort’

Nicole [2:15] I guess when they first come up, I have the old pattern of trying to push them away or reject them.  I just remind myself that it’s really important for me to accept all of me.  Even the parts that feel uncomfortable or I have a little bit of shame around and just let them come and let myself sit in them and think about what I need.  Like do I need to connect some more with other people?  Do I just need to give myself a hug?  Like just really listened to sort of what my inner child is telling me what she needs and being able to give that to her is amazing.

Mark [2:52] Can I ask what’s it like for your inner-child for the adult Nicole to now connect to the inner child?

Connecting to my Inner Child

Nicole  [2:59] She is so happy.  She’s very happy. She’s getting the love that she always wanted and she always deserved and she feels so much more at peace.

Mark [3:11] Great.  That’s a beautiful connection when she can be at peace.

Nicole [3:15] Yeah, definitely.

Connecting to the energetic needs of our Inner Child

Mark [3:18] That old inner child.  Its like a bit of a bottomless pit of connection really sometimes. It’s always needing something.

Nicole [3:28] Yes, definitely.

Mark [3:31] I’m wondering whether our society or our social conditioning has conditioned us to sort of push that away to repress that.  It’s not okay.  Stop being selfish and all those old messages given by society.

Societal Suppression of our Divine Inner Child

Nicole [3:47] Absolutely.  I feel like growing up my family didn’t realize what they were doing.   There were certain emotions that they preferred and certain

Connecting to Social Connections 

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Tony McManus to the Heart of Connection podcast.  Tony is a sought after speaker on many levels in the community for Beyondblue and RUOK across Southeast Australia. He was the first independent chairman of the headspace local consortium across 100 headspace centres across Australia. He then established the headspace Geelong fund.  He focuses on identifying strategic mutual benefits and win-win outcomes.  He’s also an active supporter of the establishment of the Lara and Community district bank. He operates a consulting service McManus Consulting Services.

www.mcmanusconsultingservices.com.au

https://www.linkedin.com/in/tony-mcmanus-48a19010/

A Passion to Social Connections

Mark [0:35] After selling his Lara based real estate business, Tony has been passionately being promoting Mental Health Solutions on Social Connections through mentoring and volunteering via his Facebook page – Grow 2 Connect after his brother Mick took his life.  A passion for helping others deal with mental health issues began and resulted in, among other things, successful lobbying of the Geelong and Hawthorn football clubs to play annually for the AFL Beyond Blue Cup.  As a vehicle to promote awareness and reduce stigma in the community about depression.  Welcome, Tony.

Tony [1:14] Thanks, Mark.  We’ve been threatening to catch up with each other for a while so nice to finally put positive thoughts into action.

Making time for Connection in our Busyness

Mark [1:23] Yeah, it takes a bit of time in the busyness of the world to have a connection.

Mark [1:28] So Tony, just by way of introduction is there anything I missed in your biographical that you could add to?

Tony [1:34] Maybe I might add that I’m working three days a week with the Geelong Community Foundation.   That nicely ties in with the work that I do in the space of social connection.  As a mental health solution because a lot of the organisations that we fund are the types of organizations that I could also point people in the direction of to do some volunteering.  So it’s quite a good synergy between what I do there for a job and also what I have is an interest on the side in terms of helping others through social connection.

Men’s Connections lost in the busyness

Mark [2:10] Men and connection.  Where do we start with men and the connections to Self, Others and ‘All That Is’ – how do you connect yourself?  What’s your process to connect to you and to connect to others?

Tony [2:26] I suppose in answering that I was probably initially part of the problem in this space of not having much awareness of self.  I was just too busy head down – bottom up at work, providing what’s the expression? ‘Bringing home the bacon’ and running a business.  There wasn’t too much awareness about me I think. Probably over a period of time, that led to the classic midlife crisis burning out.  All those kinds of things and getting through being in a pretty bad place you kind of do a lot of reflecting and is a lot more self-awareness now.

Connecting to more Balance in my Life

If I had my time over, I would have had a bit more balance.   So I’ve actually created a six-point template where I highlight the importance of self and my own journey has been to find a lot of stimulation, rebuilding self-esteem, motivation whatever you want to call it.  I did this by helping others.  So the best way to kind of extend or elaborate on that basic way of looking at things is to maybe try and do it in a social situation.  The old Rotary Club is as good an example as any in terms of a safe place. When I went through that period of time, I had a marriage breakup, I was essentially out of work.  All of my equity was tied up in a lawyer’s trust ac