Transform Your Life With Steve and Pete

Help! I'm a People Pleaser


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Many people find themselves stuck in difficult situations because of their need to please everyone around them. People-pleasing can be exhausting and overwhelming. This episode will help you identify the causes and effects of this habit and teach you how to establish healthy boundaries for yourself. 


Transformation Tip:  “I can’t tell you the key to success but the key to failure is trying to please everyone” - Ed Sheeran


Symptoms of people-pleasing:

  • You find it really hard to say no  
  • You feel responsible for everyone’s happiness
  • You feel governed by guilt 
  • You feel a sense of over responsibility
  • You avoid relational conflict


Negative effects of people-pleasing: 

  • Every time you people please you lose a sense of your personal boundaries
  • People begin to assume that you can do and will do anything
  • You become spread too thin and then you cannot do things to the best of your ability which causes people to become upset with you 
  • Manipulative and abusive people will be drawn to and take advantage of you

Causes of people-pleasing:

  • The need for validation causes you to chase opportunities to please people
  • Fear of rejection
  • Fear of being incapable (needing to prove you can do something)


How to overcome people-pleasing:

  • Recognize your triggers
  • Start saying no
    • No is a complete sentence
    • You will face resistance 
    • Be ready to stand your ground 

Transformation Application: Say ‘no’ to something this week. 

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Transform Your Life With Steve and PeteBy Steve Chua and Pete Cafarchio