The word “narcissist” gets thrown around so casually that it can blur the line between a difficult partner and a truly high-control relationship. That confusion can be costly when you’re trying to decide whether to stay, how to protect your kids, or how to prepare for divorce without getting pulled back in by guilt, fear, or someone else’s shiny reputation.

We sit down with Jamie Davis, a narcissistic coach and the voice behind The Spin Cycle, to name the patterns that so many people feel but can’t quite explain. We talk about narcissism on a spectrum, what clinicians mean by narcissistic personality disorder and Cluster B, and the cycle that keeps partners hooked: idealization and love bombing, then devaluation, intimidation, and discarding, then the charm that shows up just long enough to keep you doubting yourself. Jamie breaks down how gaslighting connects to black and white thinking, why feedback is treated like an attack, and how control can creep in through finances, social perception, and “help” that isn’t really help.

We also dig into the different faces of narcissism: covert, overt, and communal narcissists who look heroic in public while you feel silenced at home. If you’re thinking, “No one will believe me,” you’re not alone. You’ll leave with practical tools for emotional regulation, nervous system support, and safer communication choices, plus a clear warning about why marriage counseling can backfire when psychological abuse is present.

If this resonates, subscribe, share this with someone who needs language for what they’re living through, and leave a review so more people can find these resources. What’s one red flag you wish you’d trusted sooner?

To connect with Jamie Davis at Spin Cycle Coaching:

https://www.stopthespincycle.com/coaching

Hi and welcome to Thrive and Decide. I’m your host Sarah Thress. This podcast is intended to help women who are going through a divorce, continplating divorce or have lost a spouse feel seen, heard, understood and not alone. All the beautiful souls who share on here are coming from a place of vulnerability and a common belief that sharing your story will help others. You will also hear from industry experts on what to do and not do while going through a divorce.

Sarah Thress
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