BUON GIORNO!! APIZZA PIE!!! HEYNA IS LIVE FROM THE ITALIAN FESTIVAL BABY!! DOWNTOWN SCRANTON! WE ARE EATIN’ CALZONE. WE ARE EATIN’ PIZZA FRITTA. WE ARE EATIN’ BRAGIOLE. WE ARE MAKIN’ NIPPLES WITH CANNOLI. YOU KNOW? LIKE HOLDIN’ THE CANNOLI UP TO OUR CHEST, NIPPLE-HEIGHT, GOIN’: “OOOOH, LOOK AT MY NIPPLES. OOOOOOH ME.” YOU KNOW? BUT A LADY HAD TO RUIN THE FUN, COMIN’ UP TO US SAYIN’: “I HAD A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY. HOW DARE YOU.” AND WE SAID: “C’MON, JANICE! IT’S THE ITALIAN FESTIVAL!” I MEAN, NO OFFENSE TO HER... BUT, IF YOU CAN’T DO CANNOLI NIPPLES— WHAT’S THE POINT?! C’MON!