Sign up to save your podcasts
Or
Share Hidden Ways You’re Self-Sabotaging—And How to Change It | Ep. 34
Share to email
Share to Facebook
Share to X
Share to email
Share to Facebook
Share to X
Or
Hidden Ways You’re Self-Sabotaging—And How to Change It | Ep. 34
Why do we keep getting in our own way — even when we want something badly?
In this episode, Ted and Patrick dig into the deeper psychology of self-sabotage: what it really is, why it happens, and how to break the cycle for good.
We’ll unpack:
- Why “self-sabotage” isn’t a diagnosis — and what it’s really a symptom of
- How fragile self-worth and old beliefs quietly shape destructive patterns
- The many ways self-sabotage shows up in your career, creative work, and relationships
- Why some of these behaviours feel protective — even when they hurt you
- The traps that keep you stuck on repeat (and how to see them before they happen)
- Practical ways to break the cycle and move forward with confidence
Follow us on our Socials:
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw
X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome Intro
00:07 Episode Intro
00:49 Ted’s Trip to Santa Barbara
02:29 When It’s Time to Stop Wallowing
02:49 Holding Space Without Holding On
03:13 How We Torture Ourselves With Old Pain
03:55 The Power of Putting It Away
04:14 Patrick’s Life Updates & Milestones
05:19 The Third Child Nightmare
06:47 When Your Partner’s Dream Turns Into Your Problem
08:24 Seeing Self-Sabotage Across Life
09:39 Understanding Self-Sabotage
10:21 Patterns of Behaviour and Fear of Failure
10:55 Self-Sabotage as a Symptom
12:35 The Inertia Behind Self-Sabotage
16:03 Embracing Failure and Taking Risks
20:01 The Fragile Sense of Self and External Validation
22:47 Embracing Failure in the Creative Process
23:42 The Cycle Of Learning and Self-Improvement
26:57 Understanding Procrastination and its Roots
27:51 Finding Limits and Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
30:16 Creating for Yourself vs. Seeking External Validation
33:06 The Impact of Procrastination on Life Choices
37:31 Self-Sabotage in Relationships
48:34 Avoidant Behaviour and its Consequences
53:11 Summary & Final Thoughts on Self-Sabotage
54:29 The Value of Vulnerability and Effort
57:49 Outro
View all episodes
By Ted KnutsonWhy do we keep getting in our own way — even when we want something badly?
In this episode, Ted and Patrick dig into the deeper psychology of self-sabotage: what it really is, why it happens, and how to break the cycle for good.
We’ll unpack:
- Why “self-sabotage” isn’t a diagnosis — and what it’s really a symptom of
- How fragile self-worth and old beliefs quietly shape destructive patterns
- The many ways self-sabotage shows up in your career, creative work, and relationships
- Why some of these behaviours feel protective — even when they hurt you
- The traps that keep you stuck on repeat (and how to see them before they happen)
- Practical ways to break the cycle and move forward with confidence
Follow us on our Socials:
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw
X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome Intro
00:07 Episode Intro
00:49 Ted’s Trip to Santa Barbara
02:29 When It’s Time to Stop Wallowing
02:49 Holding Space Without Holding On
03:13 How We Torture Ourselves With Old Pain
03:55 The Power of Putting It Away
04:14 Patrick’s Life Updates & Milestones
05:19 The Third Child Nightmare
06:47 When Your Partner’s Dream Turns Into Your Problem
08:24 Seeing Self-Sabotage Across Life
09:39 Understanding Self-Sabotage
10:21 Patterns of Behaviour and Fear of Failure
10:55 Self-Sabotage as a Symptom
12:35 The Inertia Behind Self-Sabotage
16:03 Embracing Failure and Taking Risks
20:01 The Fragile Sense of Self and External Validation
22:47 Embracing Failure in the Creative Process
23:42 The Cycle Of Learning and Self-Improvement
26:57 Understanding Procrastination and its Roots
27:51 Finding Limits and Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
30:16 Creating for Yourself vs. Seeking External Validation
33:06 The Impact of Procrastination on Life Choices
37:31 Self-Sabotage in Relationships
48:34 Avoidant Behaviour and its Consequences
53:11 Summary & Final Thoughts on Self-Sabotage
54:29 The Value of Vulnerability and Effort
57:49 Outro