Sometimes in this process there's the spouse or partner that has the initial idea to look into foster/adoption and if that person is really lucky their partner/spouse is supportive and on board. What's it like to be that supportive partner? What are some of the concerns and thoughts that Dad has had on this journey? Also this week we talk about why we think you should not try to do this alone. Having an advocate and an agency in your corner can be vital!

Christmas can be tough for everyone as we try to get through the season with love ones who are absent from our lives, but there is the potential for the added elements of complication and trauma in the foster and adoptive world. We share YOUR stories, current issues and solutions as we discuss this topic with Grammy!

How do Grandparents factor in to all of this and how do they feel? Especially since we as foster/adoptive parents are asking them to take on something that was our choice and not theirs... Grammy is here this week and we couldn't pass up the opportunity to have her on the show to share her perspective. We also need your foster/adopt Christmas stories, good/bad/hard/beautiful... for our Christmas episode next week!

We are tackling an unfortunate and dark topic today... what do WE as the larger foster/adoption community do about toxic foster families. They ARE out there, and in a system that is underfunded and overworked, they are largely ignored. We talk about our own growing awareness of this issue, and are asking for solutions from YOU dear listener! How we manage to discuss deep things with so many goofy asides is beyond me but we certainly managed to to it this week. What are your thoughts?

We had a tough week this week. We discuss our take-aways and talk about something that's being discussed a lot right now: kiddos that think they would be better off somewhere else because their parents are >gasp< ACTIVELY PARENTING. This is a tough one.... how do we assure them they're in the right place, that it IS hard, that we love them unconditionally, and that the grass is NOT always greener in another family. I need a nap just thinking about it......

In this episode brainstormed by HK, we talk about "Dangerous Decisions" with finances, in school, and on-line. We also answer a listener question.

This week a listener question sparked this topic. We should EXPECT foster kids to come into our homes with gaps in their learning/habits/behavior, yet it can still be super-frustrating for parents and kiddos to fill in those gaps. We talk about gaps that we have struggled to fill this first year and talk about how important it is to take the time to stop and celebrate progress because it's always somehow easier to focus on what you still need to accomplish instead of celebrating how far you've come.

Why do older kiddos in the system sometimes feel that they need to lie and leave a smokescreen of their activities even when things are all above board? Today we brainstorm this challenge and our thoughts about why this happens and what parents can do about it. Plus... listener questions!

Today we discuss a book that I read a long time ago that I had HK take a look at this week. The book is called "A framework for Understanding Poverty" by Ruby K. Payne, Ph.D. The book talks about the very different rules that belong to different classes and the blind-sides that might occur when people shift from one setting to another. The book has helped me as a teacher and has definitely given me insight into some unexpected things that have happened in our first year with HK.

In this special 3 part series that HK came up with, he talks about what it's like to be an young teen the system... ages 11-14 We talk about what has gone down for him in the last 3 years, how that has felt, and what foster and adoptive parents can do to help.