"My dear Listener,

How very kind of you to descend this far.

You now find yourself seated within the Holiday Crawlspace Theatre, a most intimate venue buried beneath floorboards, frost, and works of great fiction. Tonight's performance is a seasonal selection of unease--carefully unwrapped tales featuring familiar faces in unsettling scenes.

I shall be your host, Alistair Crowe, guiding you between the acts, minding the lights, and ensuring no one leaves before the curtain falls. Now, please, do make yourself comfortable--there is no intermission, and the exits have a habit of moving...

Warmest regards,

Alistair Crowe

Host, Holiday Crawlspace Theatre"