horror Archives -

RESIDENT EVIL MOVIE REVIEW There have been seven Resident Evil live action film adaptations. SEVEN. That’s not even counting a whole slew of animated film ones to boot. So why can’t anyone translate the terrifying and legendary game series into a film that works on a level past ‘campy’ or ‘the director just wants to […]

NECROMANCER EP.148 – NORWAY TO LIVE: THE UGLY STEPSISTER The necromancers don’t care who you are, where you’re from, what you did, Oslo, as you love us. Bret and Shira do indeed love the capital and rest of Norway too, despite the chilly reception upon their arrival at the crumbling fairytale castle of Bret’s horror […]

ONSLAUGHT MOVIE REVIEW The director of You’re Next and The Guest goes back to the action/horror style of his earlier works with Onslaught. The film follows Celeste (Adria Arjona) a super pissed-off single mom and ex-marine now managing a rundown trailer park in the middle of nowhere. Who should interrupt this existence of creeping despair […]

THE LAST HOUSE MOVIE REVIEW Home is where the heart is. Unfortunately, it’s also where the doors won’t open, the windows won’t break, and something deeply unpleasant is wandering around outside in the rain. Netflix’s The Last House traps Jason (Wagner Moura), Ann (Greta Lee), and their two children inside their family home with absolutely […]

HELLCAT MOVIE REVIEW How’s this for a horror movie setup? Lena (Dakota Gorman) wakes up injured, confused, and locked inside a camper trailer hurtling down the highway. The mysterious Clive (Todd Terry), communicating from the truck ahead, insists she’s been infected with something nasty and they have only an hour to reach a doctor. Lena […]

INSIDIOUS: OUT OF THE FURTHER MOVIE REVIEW Coming in at entry number six is Insidious: Out of the Further, facing the ultimate horror franchise hurdle: how do you keep malevolent spirits scary after six movies? Quick recap: Generally, ghosts suck, mainly in their attempts to mess with humans and gain entry to our world. Previous […]

TEENAGE SEX AND DEATH AT CAMP MIASMA MOVIE REVIEW What happens to an IP (intellectual property) that nobody watches anymore? Sometimes they devolve into so many gradually deteriorating sequels that the characters find themselves in space. Usually the series get bought by some lesser streaming service so scared little children at a sleepover can watch […]

NECROMANCER EP.146 – ONES THAT OBSERVE: SMILE 2 (2024) The necromancers honor their pop star film tour obligations with Bret’s horror pick, Smile 2. Being a pop star and a scream queen is not for the faint of heart but doing both at the same time, backwards, and in heels is something only Naomi Scott […]

THE DEVIL’S MOUTH MOVIE REVIEW A wise Pixar fish once sang, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.” It’s a clever mantra reminding us all that when the storm hits, you’ve gotta hold onto hope and never give up. Amazon Prime presents The Devil’s Mouth, a survival-horror shark attack film set in the beautiful country of […]

NECROMANCER EP.145 – ONES THAT ENTERTAIN: MUSIC & LYRICS The necromancers are going on tour and saved you a seat on the bus, baby. Bret and Shira explore depictions of pop stars on film starting with Shira’s pick, Music & Lyrics (2007). Will Bret pull a Mariah Carey and claim “I don’t know him” when […]