Horror Weekly

As we near the end of the year, we’re going to cover three more newer releases and still do a couple of oldies. Since it’s so close to Christmas, we’ll deal with “The Carpenter’s Son” first, then play a “Werewolf Game” because it’s “In Our Blood.” Then we’ll continue our seemingly eternal series of kaiju reviews with “Godzilla 2000: Millennium” and the classic 1972 film, “The Legend of Boggy Creek.”

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #51, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link:

https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 The Carpenter’s Son

* Directed by: Lotfy Nathan

* Written by: Lotfy Nathan

* Stars: Nicolas Cage, Noah Jupe, FKA Twigs

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 34 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Inspired by “The Infancy Gospel of Thomas,” where the idea is that Jesus was born with his full powers, in the body of a boy who didn’t know he was Jesus yet or what to do with it. It’s quite slow moving, mostly quiet, and low on action. The horror elements are there a little, some creepiness, and lots of religious elements. It’s well made but mostly we thought it was pretty dull.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on a woman giving birth. The father looks up and sees a bright light from the sky along with Heavenly whispering. The baby is born, and as they leave the cave, they pass a bunch of people screaming and sacrificing a baby. They want the couple’s newborn baby, but they hide it. As the sun rises, the man sees the devil in the desert. Credits roll.

The couple and the baby have been in hiding for years, and the baby is now a young man. The father narrates that the son has powers that can’t be explained, but it’s his responsibility to protect him.

The father is a carpenter, but the only work he can get is carving pagan idols. The boy watches as the new neighbor, Lilith, a mute girl, takes a shower. He also gets annoyed when his father insists that he pray for forgiveness. The boy has a recurring nightmare about being nailed to a cross with his mother crying at his feet.

The boy runs into a girl who wants to play games with him. They find a man with leprosy, and that goes badly. His father still wonders if he’s from the angels or from demons; he’s not really sure. That night, the leper returns and claims that the boy’s touch has healed him. Now all the lepers want to be touched. Later the girl gives the cured leper a peach, and the next day the carpenter and the boy see the leper dead.

The girl offers the boy a carved wooden snake and suggests that keeping secrets feels really good, not being subtle about tempting him.

Lilith collapses with black stuff coming out of her mouth and bites a chunk off her mother’s face who screams that it’s the boy’s fault. His father finds the toy snake and there’s a whole argument that comes from that. The father insists that the boy would be dead without his protection.

The boy sneaks off to meet with the girl, who is busy poisoning more peaches, and she takes him to see a site where prisoners are being tortured and executed for the crime of sorcery. The girl explains that the carpenter isn’t really the boy’s father at all. When he asks his mother, she’s evasive, and he knows she’s lying.

The boy is thrown out of school for talking about things he couldn’t possibly know. The boy then goes back to the place of torture and pulls the demon right out of Lilith, who is chained there. He releases her and sends her away. Others there see the whole thing, and they’re gonna talk.

The father and the mother argue about the boy’s conception and crimes. The father is bitten by a snake, and the boy heals the wound right away, clearing up any doubt the father had. He also tells the boy who his father really is. The villagers come for the family, and that goes badly for some of them.

As the strange girl tells the boy her origin story, the sky turns red. She admits that she’s The Adversary. She then opens up the gateway to Hell and gives him a peek. The father arrives and interrupts this until the boy stops her from killing him. After a brief argument, she stabs the father anyway.

This all leads to a serious fistfight between the boy and Satan. The boy wins, but the father tells him not to kill her and forgive her instead. The boy moves to heal Joseph, but Joseph tells him to let him go, and the red sky clears with a beam of sunlight shining down on him as he dies.

The boy goes over and forgives the strange girl, who tells him about his own end. The boy, Yeshua, and his mother, wander off into the mountains. We’ve probably not heard the last of these two…

Brian’s Commentary

So many flies. If you don’t like flies, then this is definitely a horror movie.

Nicolas Cage plays this one mostly straight, although he does get one yelling scene, which is something he’s always good at. The rest of the cast is good too, although the story is a bit weak. Yes, it’s based on one of the apocryphal gospels, but they could have spiced it up a bit more.

It was an interesting concept, but a little boring in my opinion.

Kevin’s Commentary

I thought this was slow moving almost to the point of boredom but at least it’s only a little over an hour and a half run time. Knowing how it was going to end took away much of the suspense they were trying to build.

The cast is good at what they were doing, but it seemed like a wasted opportunity that they could have done more with.

2025 Werewolf Game

* Directed by: Cara Claymore, Jackie Payne

* Written by: Jackie Payne

* Stars: Tony Todd, Robert Picardo, Bai Ling

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 36 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Twelve strangers with various issues are kidnapped and sent to an island for a deadly game of “werewolves” and “villagers.” Kept in line by security devices and guards, they have no choice but to play and gradually eliminate each other. It’s got the horror elements of kidnapping, human prey, and murder, but it’s really not a horror movie. Brian gives it a thumbs up, and Kevin gives it a thumbs down.

Spoilery Synopsis

As the credits roll, we get lots of action shots and text that explains “The Werewolf Game” a social game of survival where random people all over the world are kidnapped and divided into two groups: werewolves and villagers. It’s one side versus the other, and only one can survive.

We open on a dozen people gagged and tied to little student desks. A man in a mask comes out and welcomes them to the game. Three of them will be wolves and the rest villagers. He explains the rules. One man tries to fight back and loses a finger for his trouble.

The Judge in the mask introduces Chris, Monica, Demi, Natalie, Bill, Suzie, Zak, Seth, Pepper, Matthew, Emmitt, and two people whose information is not revealed.

Demi doesn’t want to play and tells the others that she’s a werewolf. The others all vote on who the werewolf is, which is really obvious since Demi just admitted it. Demi tells the others all about herself before the final vote; she wants to get it over with. One of the guards then blows her head off. That’s one of the three werewolves discovered.

All the other contestants are then released on the island and go their separate ways to cabins. Matt and Raymond, one of the players with no background, talk. Seth and Natalie do the same. Chris grabs everything he can use as weapons. Monica helps Bill with a gunshot he received accidentally.

There are three problems on the island. First is the sonic weapon that can kill them. The second is that they’re all going to kill each other. We don’t get to hear what the third one is.

Some of the others talk, and none of them remember how they got here. Monica wants to die but can’t make herself jump off the cliff.

Night falls, and after 3 a.m. the werewolves are allowed to come out and kill. Everyone is terrified as they wait. A person in a werewolf mask comes into Suzie‘s cabin and kills her.

The whole group gathers the next day, and Raymond talks about the company that runs the game. He used to work for them but hacked the system. They’re all skeptical about that. Chris talks big about the traps he’s set; he’s got military experience, but no shirt. He’s not very social, and the others want to “vote him out.”

Everyone is called to the great hall for the daily vote. Old Zack won’t answer his door, and he looks very ill inside; the guards violently force him to attend. Now, they all have to decide who to kill. They all vote for Zack, who has just been acting weird throughout.

Monica and Emmitt start getting close, which annoys Pepper. Chris finds a shirt and talks to Natalie about winning.

On the second night-hunt, Monica and Emmitt spend the first part of the night together, but he goes back to his cabin before the deadline. Emmitt is killed by a werewolf.

In the morning, Raymond explains more about the company. It’s all an experiment in mind control and social engineering. Seth gets all argumentative.

The group decides to vote equally for Monica and Raymond to die, forcing a tie. They don’t play fair and vote for Raymond to die.

Bill says he’s solved it; Matt and Monica are the werewolves. He used to be a detective, so his opinion matters, even though a lot of the others don’t agree with him. That night, the wolf kills him.

In the voting the next day, Chris kills two guards and is killed in return. This is the last round of voting, as there aren’t enough players left to keep the mystery up. The group decides to gang up on Seth this time, but he accuses Pepper.

Monica, Natalie, Pepper, and Matt are left. Maybe two of them are werewolves, but one certainly must be. Monica thinks Pepper is the werewolf, but she still denies it. Matt blames her as well. Matt and Pepper are the werewolves. Instead of killing Monica and Natlie, the group decides to kill the judge instead.

The Judge says the three girls have won the game. He takes off his mask and explains that the brass upstairs requires a big show. He shows them videos of previous winners. He says he’s been rooting for them all along, and the company wants them to join the management and guide humanity.

Natalie goes after the Judge with an axe and kills him. With the judge dead, the guards all fall down dead, as their mind control no longer works. The three girls take a boat and go home.

Brian’s Commentary

It’s like a feature-film length version of one of the games from “Alice in Borderland,” with lots of logic and violence. There are no real werewolves in the film, and they don’t pretend that there are.

Why hire someone as big as Tony Todd and then have his face obscured by a mask throughout the film? I know he wasn’t very healthy toward the end of his life, but he didn’t look bad.

Overall, it’s a sort of deadly whodunnit, more of a thriller than straight-up horror, but it certainly had plenty of paranoia and we had plenty of theories.

I didn’t know until the film was almost finished that it was all based on a party game.

There’s a lot here that I didn’t quite follow on the first viewing, and a lot of the “company” stuff never did make much sense.

The overall plot, pacing, and mystery were pretty decent however. Overall, I liked it.

Kevin’s Commentary

I didn’t like the choice of keeping Tony Todd under mask either.

I just found the paranoia and the accusations and bickering and debating to be tiresome yada yada. All they had for any of the roles, werewolf, oracle, village, bodyguard was the word of the person saying what role they were. There’s really no way to tell.

It’s well made with good acting and production values, but I thought the script was stupid. I didn’t like it.

* dy, E.J. Bonilla, Alanna Ubach

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 29 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A filmmaking couple travel to see her estranged mother, making a documentary along the way so that the entire thing is entirely found footage style. It’s very slow moving as we travel along with them trying to figure out what’s going on, then things escalate abruptly, so stick with it. All is explained, and it’s very good.

Spoilery Synopsis

Emily and Danny park on the side of the road to get some footage at a scenic place. She explains that she’s visiting her estranged mother, who is “clean” now. She’s been an addict forever, and the plan is to record their reunion for a reality film.

They arrive at the house in the desert and have a tearful reunion. They all sit down for dinner. Sam, the mother, wants to “make it right with you” after all these years. Emily turns out to not be as forgiving as she thought she’d be. Sam invites them to the clinic where she works in the morning, and then they go to a motel for the night.

In the morning, at the clinic, Sam isn’t there; she called off work. They interview Ana, the program director there at the rehab clinic. They talk to the homeless there, and they all talk about people going missing.

Afterward, they go back to Sam’s house, fearing a relapse since she won’t answer her phone. Emily finds a skeleton key in Sam’s bed. A photo is missing, and they look at it on yesterday’s footage– Sam burned it for some reason.

Emily spends all day waiting and looking for Sam, but she’s just gone. They start to track down some clues and end up talking to some people who saw her just last week.

When they get back to the motel, they find rats and a pig’s head in their bathtub. Ana suggests it’s a gang thing trying to intimidate them. Someone doesn’t want them here.

The next day, they interview Isaac and Beth, people who were in that burned photo. One of the people in the photo used to work for the coroner’s office but was fired when a body went missing. Of the people in that photo, one is dead and two are missing.

They go back to Isaac’s place and find another pig’s head. They get a letter from Sam, but it may have been forged. Emily goes to a bar where the gang hangs out, and that goes badly but the gang doesn’t have Sam.

Emily gets a call from Beth. Isaac has left her and left a probably-forged letter. In his office are hundreds of bags of blood, like in a blood bank. Isaac was selling it, but Beth isn’t sure that Sam was involved.

Emily and Danny go back to the rehab center, where they’ve been staying, and Red, one of the patients, goes crazy and attacks Emily. Ana explains that Red was always afraid of Sam. They track down where Red lives, and he’s got a whole “crazy wall” about the missing people. He’s got a photo with Sam and Isaac circled, so he knows about that.

Danny thinks Red is a serial killer and gets really upset. Emily talks him into staying with her and visiting Red in jail. Red’s being released, so they follow him to Ana’s house, where they find all the stuff from Red’s room.

Ana comes in with her pet pig and wants to show them something downstairs. She pulls a gun on them and tells Danny to keep filming, no matter what. She’s got a little pig farm down here, but past that, they find Isaac and Sam chained to the wall. “Sam is not your mother anymore,” Ana explains.

Ana cuts her hand and shows the blood to Sam, who sprouts fangs and hisses. So does Isaac. Sam and Isaac are vampires. She then cuts Sam’s throat, which heals up nearly instantly. They’ve been abducting homeless people and others who won’t be missed, and only Ana noticed. She then beheads Isaac and then hands Emily the ax to kill Sam. Sam admits that the world would be better without her. Emily does it.

Ana explains the skeleton keys, which represent the vampire’s lineage. She explains the whole thing.

Emily then kills Ana, drinks her blood and then finishes off Danny. She then does a final report to The Commission, the group of vampires behind the organized blood bank. They have a whole rulebook for this kind of compromised cover. She resigns, and The Commission sends someone after her…

Brian’s Commentary

It’s basically a mystery, and we don’t know what’s really going on through most of the film. We don’t know until more than an hour in. It was a little slow and tedious for that first hour, but it did pick up a lot after the reveal. There was a hint toward the end of much larger things going on, and that would have been interesting to explore more of, but it’s just a teaser. Do they have a series in mind? I don’t know, but I’d be interested in seeing more of that.

Kevin’s Commentary

It’s found footage with heaping scoops of trauma, angst, and guilt as we get to know the main duo and her mother. Then things get stranger and more interesting after mom disappears. A little more interesting. And then things make an abrupt leap. And suddenly it’s a vampire movie! Though I suspected that’s where it was heading. Though it was a surprise that Emily was infected and killed Ana and Danny. And cool that it turns out to be a vast and organized conspiracy.

I thought it was pretty great.

1999 Godzilla 2000: Millennium

* Directed by: Takao Oawara

* Written by: Hiroshi Kashiwabara, Wataru Mimura, Takao Okawara

* Stars: Takehiro Murata, Hiroshi Abe, Naomi Nishida

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 39 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This is a sequel to the 1954 original that ignores all the other movies in between. Godzilla is back to save us all by battling an alien kaiju, creating lots of collateral damage and mayhem in the process of course. The effects are much improved from earlier films, there’s lots of action, and the story is entertaining. It’s a fun one.

Spoilery Synopsis

The Shinoda family, Professor Yuji and his daughter Io, work to set up antennas and equipment outside one evening. They are checking out seismic disturbances that shouldn’t be there. Meanwhile, at the lighthouse, the man inside feels the ground shake and then spots a huge creature eating a ship. Credits roll.

We get various shots from around town as people first encounter earthquakes and then see Godzilla’s big feet pass by. The Shinodas come face to face with the giant lizard creature. They narrowly avoid getting squashed in their car. The professor notices that Godzilla seems to be especially attacking power stations and energy sources.

Meanwhile, a submarine in a trench drops probes and explores underground caves. They’re looking for a meteorite that recently crashed down in the sea. They find it and manage to raise it to the surface.

Yuki, the photographer, goes to see the “Godzilla Prediction Network,” which is really just the Shinodas again. Young Io runs the business and tells her father, the professor, what’s going on.

Back at the meteorite raising, something goes wrong. The rock starts to rise on its own without balloons. It floats? They soon learn that it’s 70 million years old and has something metallic inside, perhaps even a living creature from outer space.

The professor learns that Godzilla is heading toward a nuclear plant next. They shut down all the reactors. Katagiri, the head of CCI, the Crisis Control Agency, comes to them for information about how to kill Godzilla. Shinoda doesn’t like the idea of killing such a rare animal.

The floating meteorite then continues floating up into the air, flying above the surface. It flies away from the scientists’ boat.

The army talks about plans to kill Godzilla; they’ve developed a new kind of missile that’s sure to hurt him. As he approaches the nuclear plant tanks and helicopters arrive, and the shooting begins. The new missiles do work, blasting out bloody chunks from Godzilla, who still doesn’t stop. He gets angry and his back starts to glow.

The flying rock heads straight toward Godzilla. It blasts him good and him sprawling. Godzilla shoots back with his atomic breath and exposes metal under the rock. The scientist, Professor Miyasaka, thinks that it crashed here millions of years ago and sank to the bottom of the ocean. Bringing it back up into the sunlight allowed it to recharge.

Shinoda, Miyasaka, and Katagiri get together and share information. Godzilla’s got an amazing recovery and healing speed. He’s regenerated from the attack already. They name this power “Regenerator G-1.”

The sun comes out and charges up the alien spaceship enough to free it from the rest of the rock. The scientists wonder if it’s actually alive as it shoots down the helicopters that have been following it. It lands on the roof of Yuki’s building and parks there for the night.

Something is hacking all the computers in the city. They soon figure out that it’s the spaceship. They bring huge bombs into the building to blow up the ship. Shinoda and Io run inside to help Yuki, but she’s found some important information from the hacked computer.

The blast bombs go off, but they don’t seem to have done anything to the ship. Messages start appearing on computer monitors. “Destruction. Dominate. Alteration. Prosperity. Revolution. Kingdom.” It’s all very dramatic but Shinoda gets out of the building in time.

And then Godzilla shows up, nearly forgotten for quite some time. He wants revenge on the flying saucer. It animates cables from the street to tie up and drag Godzilla around the city.

The ship takes some Regenerator G-1 from Godzilla’s wound and uses it to grow legs and a face. It was alive the whole time! Suddenly, the body and ship separate. It cannot adopt the Godzilla cells for its own use. Godzilla gets back up and blows the ship apart with his atomic breath.

Now there’s a regular old kaiju (named Orga) that came out of the ship, and it gets into a punching match with Godzilla. Orga can regenerate even faster than Godzilla, so that’s a problem. It’s also continuing to mutate and grows a mouth bug enough to swallow Godzilla whole. Godzilla’s atomic recharge goes into overtime, and the whole thing just explodes dramatically.

Godzilla roars in victory. Then it comes and kills Katagiri, who is OK with that for some reason. Godzilla then destroys the other half of the city on the way out…

Brian’s Commentary

So many iMacs and Netbooks.

The special effects have definitely improved, but the CGI on the ship itself hasn’t dated terribly well. The Orga creature is very neat and works well.

I like it. It doesn’t rely on the tons of lore from the previous films, but it’s implied that the characters already knew who Godzilla was, so he’s been there before.

Kevin’s Commentary

It was an interesting choice doing this as a sort of modern reboot. The models and effects have certainly improved since the early days. There is a little CGI, but it’s still mostly practical effects. I especially enjoyed this one.

1972 The Legend of Boggy Creek

* Directed by: Charles B. Pierce

* Written by: Earl E. Smith

* Stars: Willie E. Smith, John P. Hixon, Vern Stierman

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 27 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This is a documentary of encounters with a Bigfoot sort of creature in the area around Fouke Arkansas, presented as entirely real and true. Unfortunately like so many cryptid studies, any solid evidence is scarce. There are multiple recountings from real people, and many of the cast play themselves. It’s kind of interesting, a snapshot of life in the area in the early 1970s. They try to play it up for tension and scares, but it’s rated G so it’s pretty tame. Don’t expect much horror, but it was an interesting watch that we enjoyed.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re told that this is a true story, and some of the people on-screen are the original people who participated in the real drama.

We watch various scenes of a swampy area and hear lots of wildlife animal noises, to the point of it all getting a little creepy. Suddenly, there’s a roar, and all the little animals go scurrying.

A little boy runs to town and tells the old man about a “wild man” who’s hanging around his mother’s house. The old men laugh and send him home. On the way back, he hears the thing roaring in the woods; Jim tells us about it– he’s the little boy, all grown up now. Credits roll.

We’re told about Fouke, a tiny town near Texarkana. We hear about Smokey and Travis Crabtree, a couple of locals. It’s a pleasant place to live– until the sun goes down… We cut to a few locals describing their encounter with the thing in the woods. Some of them have lost livestock to it. The creature has terrorized the area for the past fifteen years.

As the people tell their stories, we see a dark hairy creature lumbering through the woods. It’s a Bigfoot, but they don’t call it that.

We watch a scene with three women alone in a cabin one night as the creature skulked around outside. We next watch a little boy hunting deer shoot the creature.

The Fouke community set up a big organized hunt for the monster. The dogs refused to trail the creature, but some of the hunters tried anyway. Injured, the creature disappeared for the next eight years. They assume he went deeper into the woods to hide.

We then get a nature montage along with a song about the Sulfur River and the Creature who lives inside the forest. It’s really something. We then cut to Travis Crabtree, a local boy, and get a song about him. Travis is out camping and visits Herb Jones, a recluse who lives out in a cabin. Herb tells us about living out there, but he’s never seen nor heard any monsters.

Somehow, the Fouke Monster returned, drawn to civilization. The word “Sasquatch” finally gets brought up and explained. A farmer and a group of children see the monster and his footprints. We see several more late night encounters with terrified women alone at night.

The creature returns the next night and reaches into the window. The men go outside looking for it, and they shoot at it. The sheriff thinks it’s a panther. It returns again, and they shoot at it again. It jumps out and grabs one of the men and he’s so freaked out he runs through the door without opening it.

The narrator warns us to keep an eye out if we ever come to that region. He’s still out there somewhere…

Brian’s Commentary

It’s rated “G,” which puts this almost in a class by itself right there. We watch the creature kill a dog and are told how he ripped its skin off.

From IMDB: “The film is based on actual reported encounters with a Bigfoot creature in the Fouke-Boggy Creek area of Arkansas throughout the 1960s and early 1970s. Most of the actors in the film were the actual people from the encounters.”

We heard and saw a lot about Travis Crabtree, but he never had anything to do with the monster, so why was he included? He even got a song about himself included.

The documentary-style narration and interviews make this all seem very real. I don’t doubt that many people, when this came out, did believe it. Bigfoot was huge in the 70s, and this was most likely a big part of that. I think the realistic way it’s done and the earnestness of everyone interviewed really make this one stand out.

It’s very dated and cheesy to a modern eye, but in the 70s, this would have been amazing. I still like it.

Kevin’s Commentary

I wouldn’t be surprised if I hadn’t seen this before, but I really don’t remember it. It’s said that it was very popular as a drive-in movie and was the tenth grossing movie of 1972.

It was one of the first feature length documentaries, and was very influential in boosting the popularity of Bigfoot and cryptozoology studies.

I found this mostly relaxing and enjoyable with all the nature scenes, rural people, and the soothing voice of the narrator. Plus a music soundtrack that includes a ballad for the creature that was pretty amusing.

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We have a fun mix of old and new this week. We’ll start off with two new releases, “The Death of Snow White” and “For God’s Sake Wake Her Up,” both new-ish. We’ll go overseas for a bit and visit “Thelma” from 2017. Then we’ll watch the American remake of Godzilla, “Godzilla” (1998). Finally, we’ll watch a true-crime-sorta film, “The Town That Dreaded Sundown” from way back in 1976. [Except we ended up reading them all out of order on the podcast, sorry!]

This, as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #51, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link:

https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 The Death of Snow White

* Directed by: Jason Brooks

* Written by: Jason Brooks, Naomi Mechem-Miller

* Stars: Sanae Loutsis, Chelsea Edmundson, Tristan Nokes

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 50 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a dark telling of the classic fairy tale. This is a good one to watch if you really enjoy Renaissance Festivals - it appears to have been filmed at one with that level of realism throughout in all the aspects. The story has the logic of a fairy tale, and it has some entertaining moments and ideas. But we both thought it was a bit long and drawn out, and not an overall winner.

Spoilery Synopsis

An old woman chases a young woman up the stairs in the castle. The old woman whispers some magic words, and the other starts to puke up maggots. She makes the guard kill himself. She then goes to the bedroom of a very pregnant woman and stabs her with a poisoned dagger. All the king’s doctors get to work trying to save the baby. The dying queen looks out the window and talks about how beautiful the snow is.

On the way out, the witch takes out more guards and encounters a buff dwarf with an axe, and she knows him. They fight epically, and she runs him through and makes her wounded escape. Credits roll.

Years later, at what appears to be a still-medieval Renfest, Princess Snow White likes the looks of The Prince. There’s some awkward flirting between the two. Meanwhile, the Queen looks at the results of an experiment of arsenic skin care on a subject. She’ll try mercury next. She looks out the window at Snow and hates her. The magic mirror knows all about her plans.

The Queen has lost some blood and wants the huntsman to kidnap one of Snow’s friends to replace it. His group of hunters arrive at the festival and search for a victim. Meanwhile, Snow and the Prince look at sparkly lights in the forest. Huntsman Kaiser kills the girl and attacks Snow and the Prince. Huntsman Gunnar, however, is loyal to Snow and helps her escape into the Dark Forest.

Snow and Sophie run into monsters in the woods, and they tear Sophie in half. The Prince and his search party look for Snow White who is wandering through the forest bloody and dazed. Back at the castle, the mirror gives the queen some advice on how to “have it all.”

Snow is captured by the huntsmen, who put her to sleep and carry her back. No– they’re interrupted by a pack of dwarves who have come to rescue Snow. None of them like the queen, either, so they all become allies. Many of them worked for her father, the king, and even helped in her childbirth.

When the only surviving guard from the dwarf ambush returns to the queen, she orders that his hand be cut off with a very small knife. But he’s still grateful and loyal. Out in the woods, the search party meets up with the dwarves and fights the tree-monsters.

Meanwhile the queen casts a spell to transform herself into an old decrepit woman, the powerful killing witch we saw at the beginning. Who goes out into the woods with a basket of apples, encounters the boy from the search party, and kills him after getting information from his mind.

The old woman runs into Snow and offers her an apple. This goes badly since the apple is poisoned; Snow goes into a coma. The dwarves and the Prince rush in, and we get a flashback to Snow’s birth. The only way to beat the magic poison is to sacrifice a life. That’s how Snow’s mother really died, she sacrificed herself.

Meanwhile, the Queen is young again but still obsessed with Snow White. She has her toes cut off to fit into Snow’s shoes.

The Prince’s group manages to break into the castle and confront the Huntsman and the Queen. In the ensuing battle, a few of the dwarves are lost. The battle goes badly for everyone, but the Prince finally manages to carry Snow back out to the woods. He kisses her and takes the poison from her. He dies, and she wakes up.

Snow is awake, and now she gets the “epic badass music” as she walks through the continuing battle. She walks into the throne room, where the queen is making the dwarves suffer. The queen orders Huntsman Gunnar to kill Snow; he hands the queen Snow’s heart. No wait– it’s a maggoty mass of decay - the queen was tricked into eating her own poison.

The dwarves use the magic mirror to bounce the Queen’s evil magic right back at her. Then the dwarves get all medieval on her. The queen melts as the figures in the magic mirror laugh at her.

Snow is now the queen, and everyone is happy. She goes out to the Dark Forest and dances with the ghost of the Prince.

Brian’s Commentary

The story is fine, but the execution leaves a bit to be desired. The dialogue and sets seem to come straight from Renaissance Festivals. Most of the scenes with the queen involve some body horror, and there are some pretty cool monsters in the Dark Forest. The dwarves are fun and well done. Some of the “actors” seem to have never spoken on-screen before.

Wilhelm and Jacob are really just Timon and Pumbaa turned human, right?

The pacing is very slow, however, and it gets a little boring at points. It does pick up a lot in the final half hour, when we finally get some action. It’s… decent once you get through the opening scenes.

Kevin’s Commentary

It’s like a Renaissance Festival. The accents, the costumes, the sets, even the dialogue, all seem put on like a Ren Fest. Where on the surface everything looks and sounds generically medieval, but if you really look and listen you can easily tell it’s a veneer.

It’s a fairy tale, not a historically accurate film, I kept telling myself. It’s silly and exaggerated for a reason. There are some entertaining moments and some scenes of real horror and gore. The mirror was cool. The dwarves were badass. So I’m not going to say that I hated it, but it was a bit too long and didn’t do much for me.

2024 For God’s Sake Wake Her Up

* Directed by: Wayne Moreheart

* Written by: James Justin Howells

* Stars: Sarah Crawford, Mamie Kakimoto, Queen Legend

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 27 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Two young women wandering the city after avoiding one of their mother’s funeral stumble on another woman who is suffering from a severe case of recurring sleep paralysis. They slowly learn it’s not just a simple medical condition. We both agree, it’s a slow moving one but it was very good.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on a videotape of April talking about her sleep paralysis; she’s afraid it’s going to kill her. We then watch it happen as credits roll.

We watch as Rizz and Myles walk along the train track past the landfill. They admire the graffiti and then stop to steal some beer. They don’t really like beer, but it’s fun to steal it. They argue about not going to the funeral; Rizz’s mother has recently died, and she has regrets. Myles cheers her up.

The two soon wind up in the bad part of town and bump into April. Who is walking around like a sleep-deprived zombie.

April goes home to her neglected-looking house. She watches another videotape; she says she hasn’t slept more than an hour in weeks. She’s recording all this before “he takes me.” “This is my final tape,” she explains, “I am the end of the line.”

Rizz and Myles wander around through the bad neighborhood, and Rizz decides to go into one of the houses there. Why? Because!

Inside, Rizz starts digging through the stuff and finds April’s video camera and TV. She plays the tape and watches as April explains her problem. There are a lot of tapes. They go upstairs and find April in bed, apparently in some kind of seizure. Rizz wants to help the old woman, but Myles just wants to get out of there before the police get them for breaking in.

Myles tries to leave but something keeps her from opening the door. Rizz has a feeling that the answer lies in that stack of videotapes. “The entity” took April’s grandmother and her mother as well; now it’s her turn. April has no children, so she expects this will all end with her.

Meanwhile, Myles tries to break a window with a stool, but the entity rips the stool right out of her hands. Rizz insists on helping April, who told her the answers are all in the tapes. The tapes are very repetitive and not especially interesting. Finally, Myles cuts the power cord. Now, Rizz reads through April’s “crazy book” and reads it. It’s all about sleep-demons, and people have died from it before.

Rizz and Myles argue, again. Meanwhile, April is terrorized by the entity. The entity opens the door and lets Myles out, but then it won’t open again. She runs off to charge her phone and call for help. No– the entity breaks her neck and kills her, then drags the body away. Rizz freaks out until the entity drags her away as well.

Rizz watches the rest of the tapes. April explains that the entity is an ancient, primeval thing that kills people in their sleep, an incubus. The voice from the TV helps Rizz translate the words from the book. The entity finally shows up in the real world and attacks Rizz, who reads the words out loud just in time.

The sun rises outside, and April wakes up. Everyone is happy now, except for Myles, who is still dead. “We carry the bad things until they eat us up,” April narrates. We look out the window and see Rizz walking away holding the demon’s hand…

Brian’s Commentary

It’s got a tiny cast and obviously a tiny budget as well. Still, it’s well-shot and looks really good. April’s accent makes it hard to follow at times, and this is a problem because she’s the one who does most of the talking and explaining here.

It’s a story about guilt and personal trauma, and a sleep demon as well. It’s awfully slow-paced but good otherwise.

Kevin’s Commentary

This was really low budget with a cast of five, and they made the most of it. It’s just gripping enough to pull you along with the script, cast, and direction all working well together. It’s really slow moving, and low on action, but I was never bored watching it. I’d give it a thumbs up overall.

2017 Thelma

* Directed by: Joachim Trier

* Written by: Eskil Vogt, Joachim Trier

* Stars: Eili Harboe, Kaya Wilkins, Henrik Rafaelsen

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 56 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s beautifully filmed, very well acted, and super slow moving. But it does build and holds your attention as it does. When Thelma goes away to college, things start getting strange. Then frightening. And we gradually find out just how weird things really are. We both thought it was really good.

Spoilery Synopsis

A little girl and her father walk on the frozen lake in Norway, and she can see the fish through the ice. She watches as he loads his hunting rifle. He points the gun at a deer and then swivels to point it at the child. He considers shooting her for a long time and then puts the gun away. Credits roll.

We cut to a university, where the now-grown Thelma has her first day. She gets a call from her mother, who’s been tracking her location; the parents are very watchful and overprotective.

At the library, Thelma starts getting a seizure, and a bunch of birds fly into the windows. The doctor is called, and she wants to get the family history, looking for epilepsy, but Thelma is evasive– she doesn’t want her parents to know.

That night, in her dorm, a snake crawls in through the window and gets into her bed.

The next day, Thelma talks to Anja, another student, about the seizure yesterday. Thelma’s parents come to visit, and they talk about religious topics, and they don’t like her new attitude. They put her down for not believing in Creationism (she’s a biology student). They talk about her lack of humility.

She sees on Instagram that Anja is at a restaurant, so Thelma gets herself cleaned up and goes there. She sits with the group, and they all wonder why she doesn’t drink. Some of the boys make fun of religion. Afterwards, Thelma goes dancing with Anja. It’s fun– until her very unhappy parents call.

Much later that night, Thelma wakes up to find Anja standing outside in the park, apparently in a trance. Thelma gets another seizure and Anja helps her back into her room and spends the rest of the night there. In the morning, Anja can’t explain what she was doing outside the apartment last night or why she came.

Thelma and Anja start spending a lot of time together, and they both have very different family situations. They go to the ballet, and Anja’s hands sneak over to Thelma’s lap, which she did not expect. Thelma starts getting the shakes, and the lights in the theater start to sway. This all stops when the two girls start to kiss. This goes against Thelma’s strong religious beliefs, which is very conflicting for her. She calls her father and tells him about drinking alcohol.

Thelma goes to a party with a boy, Kristoff, and drinks a lot more than she’s used to. He gets her really high, and Anja doesn’t approve. She looks at Kristoff, and parts of him start to glow red. Anja does as well, which results in another kiss. Soon, there’s a snake in bed with the two of them. The snake goes into Thelma’s mouth– maybe all that was just a fantasy.

Thelma has an MRI to check for signs of a tumor, but they can’t rule out epilepsy. The medical records show she had seizures when she was six years old, but she doesn’t remember any of that.

We get a flashback to young Thelma, her mother, and the new baby. Thelma gets jealous and upset, and then, when Thelma has a little seizure, the baby simply vanishes. When her mother gets upset, Thelma makes the baby reappear under the couch. The parents know that Thelma did it, somehow.

In the MRI and exam, Thelma goes into an induced seizure, and across town, Anja sees some effects of it– she vanishes. Turns out, it’s not epilepsy; the doctor thinks it all psychological, a symptom of something else. The doctor says that Thelma’s grandmother had lots of similar problems, but Thelma was always told she was dead. She’s not dead, so Thelma is intrigued and visits her grandmother’s hospital.

The old woman isn’t very responsive, but she’s been on drugs for too many years. She’s had delusions ever since her husband disappeared; she blamed herself. “She believed that she made things happen with her mind.”

Returning to school, Thelma wonders where Anja has been. Anja’s mother doesn’t know where she went either. Thelma goes to the school pool and has another seizure while swimming. That goes badly. Afterward, she decides it’s time to go home to her parents.

The parents drug Thelma’s tea. Father tells her the whole story about the past. Once again, the baby disappeared, and this time, Thelma was asleep in bed. She didn’t do it on purpose this time and couldn’t bring him back like she did the other time. She then wanders out to the frozen river nearby and points under the ice. Not long after the mother jumped off a bridge, which paralyzed her instead of killing her.

Thelma talks to her father about Anja, and he suggests that maybe Thelma made Anja fall in love with her. He might be right. That night, the parents talk about what they have to do to keep Thelma from killing anyone else.

Thelma’s father, a doctor, prepares a syringe full of poison, but sets it aside since she’s all drugged up anyway. She understands that they did the same thing to her grandmother. She asks her father to let her go, but he says no. In the morning, she has another seizure in her sleep and, outside on the lake, her father bursts into flame.

Thelma wakes up, knows what she’s done, and swims down to the bottom of the lake. Then she comes up in the pool where she first talked to Anja. Nope, just a vision as she climbs out of the lake and coughs up a dead bird. Elsewhere, her phone rings; Anja is calling, no longer gone. And the dead bird flies away.

She goes back to the house, where her mother is clearly terrified of her. Thelma puts her hands on her mother, and she can suddenly walk again.

Thelma goes back to school and smiles at the birds as she gets back with Anja, who is fine again today. Happy ending?

Brian’s Commentary

It’s slow moving, and much higher on the drama than the horror. We swap back and forth between the parents being terrible people and being innocent victims.

It’s basically an allegory about how university changes a person, but maybe this is taken a little to extremes. I was expecting the end to be a lot like “Carrie,” but that’s not the way it went.

It’s good. Extremely slow-moving, but I never got bored.

Kevin’s Commentary

It’s beautifully filmed and well acted with a cast that seems perfectly natural in their roles. It’s extremely slow moving, but still managed to fascinate me as it went along as it builds.

The scenario is interesting. Almost more of a mutant powers, coming of age, suppressing abilities kind of story than horror. The parents seem like decent people stuck in an impossible situation. Sort of a happy ending, except for Dad - apparently she didn’t forgive him for the things he did.

Overall, I thought it was really good.

1998 Godzilla

* Directed by: Roland Emmerich

* Written by: Dean Devlin, Roland Emmerich, Ted Elliott

* Stars: Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo

* Run Time: 2 Hours, 19 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s an Americanized version of Godzilla who makes his way to New York. It’s heavy on the action, with enough humor to thoroughly take the edge off the massive destruction and body count that is played down. The creature look, and the whole feel of the movie, are quite different from the original series of films. It’s quite entertaining, but not a good fit in the series.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on old footage of nuclear bomb testing in the Pacific and the native egg-laying lizards of the area as credits roll.

A fishing boat in a storm sees something weird on the radar. Suddenly, a giant claw rips through the side of the hull and it goes badly from there.

Dr. Niko Tatopoulous drives to Chernobyl. He electrifies the soil and takes worm samples. At least until a helicopter lands from the US State Department. They have something bigger for him to work on.

In Tahiti, Philippe Roache, a doctor, talks to the lone survivor from the fishing boat; he’s radioactive now. When asked what he saw, the old man says, “Gojira.”

In New York City, Audrey and Charles talk about the promotion she wants. He just wants to cheat on his wife with her.

Niko is taken to study a gigantic footprint. Lots of footprints and destruction. His new boss, Elsie, explains what they know. They follow the footprints to a huge shipwreck. Philippe is there, and he’s with the news crew. Niko starts collecting samples.

That night, more fishing boats run into trouble. Colonel Hicks, the guy in charge of the investigation, hears about this. The creature seems to be heading toward New York City. Niko thinks it’s a new species created by radioactivity from the ocean.

Audrey gets advice about the news business from Lucy and Victor. She spots Nick on TV and likes what she sees. Meanwhile, an old man on the pier catches a really, really, really big fish, but it gets away. Godzilla meets the Big Apple, and it’s messy, right in the middle of Mayor Ebert’s speech.

Audrey sees Godzilla and decides that’s gonna be her big break. Victor grabs his camera and gets to work taping the monster; he almost gets squashed.

Nick and the others discuss how Godzilla has managed to hide somewhere in the city. The city, meanwhile, is in the process of being evacuated. Philippe talks to the mayor and plants a bug on him; he’s some kind of spy who doesn’t like American donuts and coffee.

Turns out, the monster may be hiding in the subways. Everyone does things to help with the search. Nick suggests leaving a pile of fish to draw in the creature. This works really well, much to his surprise, as they come face to face.

In the ensuing battle, the Chrysler Building gets blown up, as do many other landmarks.

Nick and Audrey meet up by accident, and it’s awkward for both of them. She gets lots of information about the new monster, and he’s more than happy to talk all about what he’s learned, including that the monster is pregnant by way of asexual reproduction. He’s… nesting. A lizard can lay up to twelve eggs at a time! Audrey then does a full news report on the story.

Nick tells the mayor and the colonel his fears about the eggs. Audrey’s boss steals her story and uses it as his own. Nick gets fired but then is immediately kidnapped by Philippe. He’s with the French intelligence, and he’s got a whole mini-military setup of his own. Victor, the cameraman, follows them and spies on the spies. Philippe convinces Nick to work with them.

All the characters head down into the subway to look for the nest and narrowly avoid getting trampled by the big guy. The monster dives into the river, where a submarine awaits him with torpedoes. One sub ends up sinking themselves, but another hits the creature and they assume it’s dead.

Nick, Philippe, and Victor head to Madison Square Garden, where the eggs are. They find three eggs. Then they find more. Many more. The group starts planting bombs on the eggs, but they didn’t bring enough. All the eggs suddenly start to hatch all at once. There is much running and screaming as the babies pursue them all through the subways.

Audrey and Victor go to the broadcast booth and start reporting. As her boss reports about people wanting to return to the city, she comes up with footage of the nest and hundreds of babies. Nick tells the military what to do to keep the lizards from spreading.

We go back to running and screaming as the babies pursue them. Meanwhile, the military is going to blow up Madison Square Garden within a few minutes. The wacky Frenchman leads them outside just as the missiles hit.

As the movie ends– no, the big Godzilla gets back up, clearly not dead. He looks at all the dead babies on the ground and there’s more running. And driving. Godzilla is fast. Godzilla ends up grabbing their car and chewing on it. Godzilla gets tangled up in the Brooklyn Bridge’s suspension cables, which allows the fighters to hit it with their missiles.

The monster collapses from its injuries and dies. Everyone celebrates except Siskel and Ebert, who argue. Audrey gets back with Nick and quits her job. Philippe steals Victor’s videotape and sneaks away mysteriously. As the main characters all walk away and make jokes, we zoom back in on the Square Garden and see that at least one of the eggs has survived…

Brian’s Commentary

Why do all the helicopters fly between the narrow buildings when they could simply fly over them and look down? This isn’t the Star Wars trench, these are buildings.

There’s a lot of silliness and humor here, and that may be the biggest weakness of the film (Siskel and Ebert jokes, really?). This is a summer blockbuster action movie, not a horror film. Matthew Broderick plays the same character he always plays, which is just too silly to take even remotely seriously.

The fully CGI monster, although very well done, is hardly recognizable as Godzilla; they were going more of a “Jurassic Park” looking lizard creature. It’s different from what we’ve seen in the past, but at least it’s well done. He’s got fire-breath, but it seems like something they threw in because they felt like they had to– it only shows up twice.

It’s a fun movie, really well made, but it’s a lousy Godzilla movie.

Kevin’s Commentary

There were two sequels in mind, but it wasn’t well received enough domestically for them to go through with it. It did much better internationally.

This version feels like it left all the horror elements behind and embraced the action. And embraced humor and silliness. It was noticeable how the creature design was different, more of a four-legged lizard who could stand on his hind legs. And he swims really well.

I thought it was too different from the originals. In fact, I read online that at the time there was a nickname circulating “G.I.N.O.” Godzilla In Name Only, and I don’t disagree. I’d say that I enjoyed it quite a bit for an entertaining movie, but it didn’t seem like much of a Godzilla movie.

1976 The Town That Dreaded Sundown

* Directed by: Charles B. Pierce

* Written by: Earl E. Smith

* Stars: Ben Johnson, Andrew Prine, Dawn Wells

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 30 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This is based on a true crime story of random attacks in Texarkana in early 1946 that killed at least five and wounded at least eight, all thought to be done by the same man. And “The Phantom” case was never solved. It’s well put together, and everything seems accurate for 1946 cars, clothes, props, etc. We both thought it was pretty good.

Spoilery Synopsis

We hear that it’s 1946 in Texarkana; the war is over and the soldiers are all returning home. At the Red River Army Depot, everything is normal, as is the economic outlook. We’re told that a reign of terror was about to begin that people still talk about thirty years later…

A couple park the car to make out. We see someone approaching outside with a sack over their face. The man breaks the window and pulls the young man outside. The girl soon follows. Credits roll.

In the morning, the girl is crawling along the side of the road, terribly injured, when a man finds her and calls for help. The deputy reports that the couple both survived, but they’re pretty messed up and in comas. The girl wasn’t raped, but she had been chewed on repeatedly.

The police chief wants to warn all the college kids to stay away from lover’s lane in the future. No suspects are found, and most people get over it.

Three weeks later, deputy Ramsey wants more patrol cars out at lover’s lane, but there aren’t enough men available. He hears shots fired and then finds a car. It’s empty but then there are more shots in the woods. He finds a man’s body and then a woman tied to a tree. The woman has bite marks on her back.

Locksmiths and gun shops in town all get very busy as people fear the serial killer. The sheriff asks for more help, and they assign Captain Morales of the Texas Rangers to investigate.

Morales is in charge now, and he seems to know what he’s doing. Patrolman Benson, his driver, is a lot less capable. Fear strikes the small town as no clues are forthcoming.

It’s been three weeks since the previous attack, and the police expect another attempt tonight. Policemen in drag go out as decoys to park in the lover’s lanes. Nothing comes of it.

There’s a big dance in town, and some women sneak some booze into their punch. It’s the prom, and all the young people attend. The dance ends and everyone leaves in pairs. One couple decides to park and make out, but it’ll be OK since they’ll still be in town.

We watch as the killer stalks their car as they get ready to go home. As they drive off, the killer grabs the can door and hangs on. He pulls the driver right out of the moving car and beats him severely. The killer ties the girl to a tree, tapes his knife to her trombone, and then plays a bloody tune on her back with it.

With this third major attack, the national press gets involved, and it starts to become a big deal. The prison psychologist profiles the killer, and the outlook isn’t good.

There’s a crime and high-speed chase. They catch the guy, and he’s suspiciously driving a stolen car. He then confesses to the murders, but Morales is skeptical.

Three more weeks pass. We watch as Helen drives home from the grocery store alone. She hears someone outside the house, but her husband Floyd doesn’t. Then someone shoots Floyd through the window. The killer breaks in and shoots her as well. She crawls out of the house and makes it to a neighbor’s house. The killer turns around and goes back to the cornfield.

Three weeks pass, and nothing happens. The police presence intensifies. Morales says that if they catch the guy, it’s going to be a miracle.

They find the killer’s car deserted in the woods. Morales and Ramsey soon spot the masked killer not far away. The killer runs to a passing train but Morales shoots him in the leg.

The cops bring in bloodhounds to follow the killer’s scent. They all chase the wounded killer out into the swamp. What happened to him, no one knows, but they never caught him or identified the killer. He may still be walking free today…

Brian’s Commentary

Slasher films in general were still pretty new at this point. The voiceover narration makes it all seem very much like a documentary about the “true crimes” the film is based on. It has local police, state police, and Texas rangers, and each group has different responsibilities, which make it all seem more realistic. This is, in fact, based on a series of actual murders, so they had a lot to work with.

There’s a bit of slapstick with “Spark Plug Benson” and his driving, but it hits a little too silly for this kind of film.

Kevin’s Commentary

I remember seeing this when it came out and finding it pretty creepy at the time as a ten-year-old.

The poster says “In 1946 this man killed five people… Today he still lurks the streets of Texarkana, Ark.” I think by this time, he’s probably not.

The movie is based on what’s known as the Texarkana Moonlight Murders, an unsolved string of at least five murders and eight woundings attributed to the same attacker in early 1946, there’s an informative Wikipedia page about it.

It’s well put together, and I thought it still holds up as an interesting movie. They play up the fear and suspense of course to spice it up and add some humor here and there - maybe a little too much humor. I can’t say it had the same effect on me as it did when I was ten, but it was entertaining.

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This time, we’ve got some fun ones. We’ll start of with some time-loop terror in “Manor of Darkness,” then watch some completely unnecessary, but still fairly entertaining rip-offs of old cartoons: “Mouse of Horrors,” “Shiver Me Timbers,” and “Bambi: The Reckoning” are all up this week. Lastly, we’ll squeeze in a classic sci-fi horror film with “Planet of the Vampires” from 1965.

Which one is our favorite? Tune in and find out– it may not be what you expect!

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #51, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link:

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Mainstream Films:

2025 Manor of Darkness

* Directed by: Blake Ridder

* Written by: Blake Ridder

* Stars: Kim Spearman, Louis James, Sarah Alexandra Marks

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 22 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Petty thieves meet evil forces when they pretend to be filmmakers and go to a giant manor to rob the place. It went in a direction we didn’t expect and built nicely as they tried to figure a way out. We both really enjoyed it.

Spoilery Synopsis

A man works in the basement until he hears a strange sound. What he hears finds him. Credits roll.

Laura talks to her mother, who needs surgery. Her brother, Chris calls, and he says he’s got something to make everything all right. Laura works at a coffee shop, and she experiences something strange one night. The same night, Chris also experiences some weirdness with Lisa, his girlfriend.

Lisa, for some reason, decides to tell Chris about her abusive family and how she ran away from home. Chris tells about what happened with Laura, eleven months ago.

Flashback time! Chris and Laura broke into a house. It’s not exactly what Chris told her, so Laura wants to leave. This is the house of Mrs. Wong, one of Chris’s old teachers who gave him a hard time– and she’s still home. When the woman gets up, she finds Laura and grabs a knife. As she recognizes Laura, Chris shoots her.

Back in the present, Laura gets a call; she’s lost her job. Chris and Lisa talk about his plan, and how Laura won’t cooperate with him. She goes to the restroom and sees something scary. When she comes out, Chris is talking to Andy, another criminal-type.

Some rich man is looking for a film crew to come into his house and film a documentary, and Chris wants to use the job as an excuse to break in and steal a fortune. We then get Andy’s backstory; he’s divorced but wants to be a good father. Later, he gets a scare in the shower. Laura decides at the last minute that she needs the money and will help in the caper.

Chris, Andy, Laura, and Lisa arrive at the old manor house and let themselves in, as arranged. They have no cell service there, which even Chris admits is a cliche. They all split up and explore the place.

Andy says he feels like he’s been here before. Laura and Lisa check out the basement while Andy and Chris check out the attic. The girls find a tied-up box in the basement that looks too tempting to pass up. They open the box and let out what appears to be the Smoke Monster from “Lost.”

In the attic, the guys find a dead body. Suddenly, Lukas, the owner of the house, and the man from the pre-credit sequence, returns home. He talks about “life after death” and his dead wife. He wants the “documentary filmmakers” to capture her spirit on film.

When they mention the dead body upstairs, Lukas picks up a knife and kills Chris and Laura. Andy goes next, leaving only Lisa, who is killed as well. There are flashes of another woman being forced to scrub and clean in the past, with religious imagery. No, they’re all fine, and we seem to have jumped back in time a few minutes. They all sense that something weird happened, but they’ve only just arrived at the house. Laura especially seems to feel some deja vu. Chris announces that there’s no cell service here at the old house. They all split up to explore the house (again).

The girls find the box in the basement, but it’s already untied and empty. The dead body in the attic is still there. Then Lukas arrives. He asks them if this is “the first time.” He stabs them all again.

We again cut to scenes of a man abusing his religious wife, who prays a lot.

At the door of the house, Laura knows they’ve all been here before, but the others don’t sense it. “We’re all gonna die… again.” Laura tries to leave, but it’s not that easy. All roads lead back to the manor.

She goes into the house and finds that Lukas has killed the other three. She tells him about it, and he knows that she opened the chest. He explains about “The Reset” and that he killed them so that they’d understand the problem. We get a flashback to Lukas and his wife moving into the house. He explains what it is that she released from that box. He has to kill her again to reset the time loop. He does and we see the abusive man and religious woman from the past again. This time, he kills her.

Laura, now reset, tells the others not to go into the basement and then hides the knives in a kitchen. She demonstrates her knowledge of the time loop to them. When Lukas comes in, Andy beats him to death. This results in Laura stabbing herself for another reset.

She explains the situation, and they mostly believe her, but they still want to remain here to find the money. Lukas arrives, as always, and Laura quickly fills him in. He finally explains what they’re up against, and it’s not good.

They all prepare themselves for battle in their own unique ways. Suddenly, the lights go out. Lisa finds herself outside, running from something nasty. Chris is locked in the attic with the body, which gets up and turns into Mrs. Wong, the dead teacher. Andy runs into a sex-crazed version of Laura, who kills him. Laura runs into her mother in the basement, but she knows that’s not real and stabs the woman. Laura dies again, this time at Lisa’s hand, and it all resets again.

This time, they all tie up Lukas as night falls outside. Laura goes to stab Lukas, but since her eyes are shut, she somehow stabs Chris instead. The smoke goes back in the box in the basement. We then get a flashback to what happened with Lukas and his wife when they moved in and kept having to stab each other.

Laura holds a diamond in her hand, she found the treasure and paid for her mother’s surgery. Andy gets his family back. Lisa is sad.

Six months later, a different couple gets invited to the manor and are told to go right on in. They soon find a tied-up box in the basement. Then Chris walks in, he welcomes them to the manor…

Brian’s Commentary

Why were all the characters experiencing bloody scenes of terror before they came to the house? There’s no indication from the trailer that this is a time-loop movie. Still, it’s well done and is paced nicely, which is hard for a time-travel film. The things that happen aren’t really explained at all; we know what happened, we just don’t really know why. It’s pretty good!

Kevin’s Commentary

The manor was a great setting. Cool big place. It seemed low budget with a bit of an indie vibe, but I thought they made the most of it, and it was very effectively done. Their growing frustration with the time loop built nicely.

The cast is good, the camera work and music is effective (kept making me think of John Carpenter’s music from the original “Halloween” at times), and the script is clever. I liked it and would recommend it.

2025 Mouse of Horrors

* Directed by: Brendan Petrizzo

* Written by: Harry Boxley, Mac Gottlieb

* Stars: Lewis Santer, Stephen Staley, Chris Lines

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 24 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

An inhuman mouse hybrid is on the prowl for body parts and victims, with much of the action taking place at a carnival - an excellent setting. The pacing is a bit off and so is the sound, but it’s watchable and gory. We thought it was very mid overall, with both of us giving it a dislike.

Spoilery Synopsis

Two girls are out at the docks. They’ve gone to the wrong place and gotten lost. They’re here to meet a rich doctor with a boat, and what they find isn’t what they expected. They find the boat, but there’s no one there. Out of nowhere, a giant rat stabs Molly and chases Dana through the shipyards and into a closed-down amusement park. As he kills her and laughs, the credits roll.

A man tells his daughter, Chloe, a story about being attacked by flies at the beach. We see the killer is watching them from afar. He’s written a book about “The Mouseboat Massacre” but he doesn’t have an ending for it yet. She goes off with her friend to a bar to meet her other friends, a group of obnoxious teens that the killer can pick off one by one later. They call Dana and Molly, but they don’t answer their phones.

Chloe tells the story about the Mouse thing as we see the Mouse killing a jogger with a chain. A mad doctor created a giant mutated mouse that was crossed with a murderous prisoner. His goal was to collect body parts of women for another experiment. The group decides to sneak into the closed-down amusement park for some fun.

Meanwhile, at the amusement park, Pooh bear has women in a cage, and it looks like a scene from “Pooh: Blood and Honey” Apparently, Pooh and the Mouse are working together to gather body parts for Dr. Rupert. It’s the crossover nobody expected! The doctor whines about the Mouse bringing him male body parts. How is he supposed to make the perfect bride with the wrong kind of body parts?

The Mouse kills a bar owner at about the same time the kids get started at the amusement park. The Mouse shows up and kills the first pair of teens, electrifying one of them with the bumpercars (I don’t think they work like that). He catches and dismembers another girl on the teacup ride. He stabs another on the sidewalk. Another guy falls into a swimming pool full of carnivorous jellyfish (what?).

Several of the girls run from the Mouse straight into the workshop of Dr. Rupert, the creator of the Mouse and the Bear. He explains the whole thing with the Mouse’s creation.

Chloe’s father goes to her mother’s house to look for her since there’s a killer on the loose. For some reason, the Mouse shows up at their house right there and then. The Mouse and the mother play darts, and that goes badly for only one of them. Dad runs away to the fair while the Mouse drags Kim away. Dad and Chloe meet up.

Suddenly, Dr. Rupert shows up, calling for Chloe. His boys really want her, and he threatens to kill her friends if she doesn’t come after them. Chloe insists they go after Kim.

Kim is actually still alive in the doctor’s workshop being tormented by Pooh. Everyone plays hide and seek in the lab. Rupert scolds the boys for their incompetence and then sets them against each other, with the bride as a prize. Chloe’s father knocks out Rupert and lets Chloe run off.

The Mouse and Pooh fight each other for a very long time, but in the end, the Mouse always wins.

Next we see the Mouse eating cheese and dancing on the deck of a steamboat. Pooh shows up, and the battle continues. Suddenly, Pooh is eaten by the worst CGI shark either of us have ever seen.

Suddenly, it’s daytime, and the Mouse is chasing Chloe around the amusement park. She stabs him in the mouth and runs to find Kim and Rupert. Chloe shoots Rupert without delay.

Chloe and Kim smash the tank holding the rest of “The Bride” ending that threat.

Brian’s Commentary

Why they didn’t call this “Steamboat Willie vs Pooh” I’ll never understand.

This one wastes no time; I was bored even before the opening credits.

The sound is awful. Some people, I could hear just fine, and others seemed to mumble everything they said. The actress who plays Chloe was so mushmouthed that we needed to turn the subtitles on.

There are some very similar plot points to 2024’s “The Mouse Trap,” even beyond just the Steamboat Willie connections. Actually, other than the killer being a well-dressed mouse, there’s no real Disney connection (not that the original Steamboat Willie had any kind of real story either). This Mouse is clearly an Art the Clown wannabe, doing all the mime-y things. I was also reminded of “The Jester” by his character’s mannerisms.

It’s got no real plot other than teens being killed one by one. The CGI is some of the worst I’ve ever seen attempted in a released film.

It’s pretty bad.

Kevin’s Commentary

The crossover with Pooh and the Frankenstein elements were unexpected.

I wasn’t impressed with the pacing or the sound quality, but there were some entertaining moments. The Mouse and his pantomime are great, he reminded me a bit of The Joker with a dash of Art The Clown. That was a bright spot.

You know the gore is good when the subtitles have things like “Flesh squelching.”

The lack of enough story made it seem long and tedious after a while.

Pooh’s death was the most rushed, unexpected awful CGI effect ever - it vaguely looked like a shark attack out of the blue. And then the final CGI scene of smashing the bride’s tank. Ugh.

I was going to say I liked it more than disliked it, but by the end I had changed my mind.

2025 Shiver Me Timbers

* Directed by: Paul Stephen Mann

* Written by: Paul Stephen Mann, E.C. Segar

* Stars: Amy Mackie, Miami Parrington, Brendan Nelson, Ross Dillon

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 13 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s 1986 and Halley’s Comet has brought meteors with it, one of which turns Popeye into a big killer. A group of friends camping, along with a few other folks, have a terrible night because of it. We didn’t think it was very funny or particularly scary. It tries, but neither of us thought it was very good.

Spoilery Synopsis

In April 1986, a girl finds a severed hand, which leads to a whole crime scene. Credits roll.

We heard about the return of Halley’s Comet after 76 years. Earlier that day, Olive Oyl and her family are going on a trip and almost run over a weird-looking man with a pipe. “Well blow me down,” he says. He’s weird and talks about the meteor shower tonight.

Castor Oyl, his girlfriend, and sister arrive at the campground, and Olive immediately catches a couple of punks beating up a homeless man who is ranting about “killer meteors” and “the comet is evil!”

Castor talks to his friend about how smart Olive is; she’s been admitted to MIT but doesn’t seem too interested in that. There’s a lot of boring talk between the two. Some more of Castor’s friends show up, and they brought the drugs.

We cut to the old man with the pipe fishing on the water as the meteors start to pass overhead. A tiny one lands right in his pipe, and he just goes on smoking; it’s full of radiation. The old man falls over and starts to mutate.

Popeye has gotten a lot bigger and meaner. He punches a punk in the face and his head explodes.

Over at the campfire, Stevie tells a story from another life, which turns out to be a scare prank. The surviving punk shows up raving about a giant sailor but they laugh him off. Trent and Lizzie retire to their tent. Stevie goes off to the outhouse to take a dump as Popeye approaches, now using the punk’s legbone as his new pipe. He crushes Stevie’s head and then literally poops down his neck.

The campers talk about movies. “Critters” has just come out, and they’re talking about a potential sequel to “The Terminator” and “Video Nasties.” While Trent and Lizzie have sex in their tent– with Popeye bloodily joining in.

Olive and Monique go for a walk and watch the meteors. They soon find one on the ground. Monique gets shot through the head by an evil meteorite. Meanwhile Castor and his girlfriend find what’s left of Stevie. The surviving trio finds Popeye sitting by their campfire. One of them has to go for the car keys in their camp, so Olive creeps on hands and knees hoping Popeye doesn’t notice. It’s suspenseful as she gets into a tent and tries not to make noise. He hears, and yanks her out, but Castor distracts him. Then the chase is on.

The girls run to the car, but they find it in flames from an apparent meteor strike. They remember hearing about an abandoned factory nearby and run toward that. Castor is there, but so is Popeye, and soon, she’s the only one left alive. Popeye dunks Castor into a canister of glowing radioactive ooze.

Olive makes it to the factory, where she runs into a man with a wheelchair and shotgun. The old man decides it’s time to share an old war story. He goes outside and Popeye gets him.

Out of nowhere, the other punk from earlier reappears, grabs the meteorite from Popeye’s pipe, and beats him with it. He doesn’t live long, but it gives Olive time to grab the meteorite from the ground and run off.

Unfortunately, it’s really hot and melts her hand completely off. That’s OK, because the crazy old man had built the largest buzz-saw in history and it’s got a handy arm-plug for her to use. She comes out of the barn and buzzes Popeye into a juicy mess. Still, Popeye puts up a big fight before dying.

Olive and Castor’s girlfriend survive their order. Soon, the police are there examining everything.

A few weeks later, the whole story is on the radio that a cleaned-up Olive is listening to while she works on a prosthetic. We hear that Popeye’s body has gone missing and there are more murders just like his up in New York. We see that Olive is preparing for a rematch with her new turbo hand…

Brian’s Commentary

The film couldn’t quite decide which scenes were happening during the day and which were at night. Sometimes, they alternated between the two in the same scene.

This is the lowest-budget and clearly the worst of the three “Popeye” movies that came out this year. “Popeye’s Revenge” and “Popeye The Slayer Man” were both better, although “better” might be a marginally relative term.

It’s listed as a horror comedy, but it’s really not very funny at all; it’s just kinda lame throughout. Watch it if you feel you must, but it’s not great.

Kevin’s Commentary

Haley’s Comet means meteors too in this universe, and who knew that a meteor shower literally meant meteors showering down to the ground?

I yam disappointed by this effort. Like Brian says, it was the weakest of the Popeye trifecta that have recently been spewed from the bowels of public domain. I’m going to go with almost painfully bad on this one.

2025 Bambi: The Reckoning

* Directed by: Dan Allen

* Written by: Felix Salten, Rhys Warrington

* Stars: Roxanne McKee, Russell Geoffrey Banks, Samira Mighty

* Run Time: 1 Hour 20 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Bambi is all grown up and mutated, and he’s had enough of the humans. The focus here is on a mother and son who become targets after a vehicle crash, but there are also some other subjects of his rage along the way. It’s short and it moves well. We didn’t expect to be as entertained as we were.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open a fairy tale book and get some voiceover narration. We watch an animation of Bambi’s mother getting shot. We get an overview of a very hard life for the local deer population. The factory polluted the waters, and Bambi gets mutated. Credits roll.

We open on a trio of hunters in the dark woods. We cut to Xana and her son Benji on a drive to Benji’s dad’s family. The driver is really chatty, and Benji gets carsick. Suddenly, a giant deer charges their car, knocking it off the road and flipping it entirely. The deer then jumps up and down on the car, causing it to crush the driver. Xana and Benji get out and run for safety.

Mary stands in the backyard chanting “Bambi” repeatedly. Her family is inside talking about the old woman’s dementia. Xana and Benji come to the door; this is grandma’s house. Harriet and Andrew argue about whether they should go try to help the driver or not, and Joshua decides to go out looking. Meanwhile, the hunters, who work for the evil factory, find the taxi, but the driver is nowhere to be found.

As Mary sketches pictures of an angry deer, the three hunters hear something in the woods and pull out their guns. They shoot Joshua by mistake.

Back at the house, Bambi smashes in through the window and terrorizes the people inside. Everyone runs out to Andrew’s camper, but Harriet can’t outrun the massive deer, who gores her with his antlers. As they drive away, the deer pursues them. Finally, they break away.

The hunters arrive at Grandma’s house and look at the damage. They find Harriet, more or less still alive, ripped in half, and finish her off.

The camper comes to a log in the road, and moving it turns out to be a disaster. They end up driving several miles at high speed with Andrew tied to the back of the bumper, bouncing all the way. Harrison hides, but Bambi soon finds him, and he gets what he deserves when he learns that Bambi has friends...

Grandma wanders off, and Xana and Benji go after her. The old woman repeats “Death. Death.” and we see just how stupid Benji really is as he lights up a torch. This shows them all the bones of Bambi’s victims. They’re in his nest! The deer reappears, and the three run straight to the hunters and tell them the story. They all drive to the hunters’ place, where they run into Simon, Benji’s father.

As Xana and Simon argue, he admits he knows all about the company dumping chemicals. Michael, the leader of the hunters, points his gun at Xana; he has no intention of helping them. Xana finds Joshua and the driver’s bodies, so she knows it as well.

Benji watches as the other two hunters carry out a baby deer in a cage to use as bait. Benji releases the baby, and Bambi takes care of the two hunters.

Bambi comes face to face with Mary, but suddenly, the whole base explodes when she shoots a pressurized gas canister. Xana, Benji, and Simon come face to face with Michael. Bambi shows up, still burning from the explosion, and takes care of Michael for them.

Simon and Xana fight over the satellite phone. She wants to call the police, but he knows he’s going to jail for the illegal dumping if she does. He runs off, leaving his ex-wife and child alone with the monster. They grab the fawn and hand it over to the big deer.

Michael returns from somewhere and shoots Bambi repeatedly. Mary comes out of nowhere and shoots him in the back.

Simon, making his getaway, sees something moving in the backseat. It’s one of Bambi’s little rabbit friends. This one has seen too much Monty Python and does “the thing.” Simon dies.

As Bambi lay dying, the little fawn is sad. Time for a sequel?

Brian’s Commentary

This is based on the 1923 book “Bambi, A Life In The Woods,” not the much more well-known 1942 Disney cartoon.

The creature effects are less than stellar, but the overall story moves along nicely and doesn’t slow down or get boring. I haven’t seen a horror movie with a stupid kid putting everyone else in extreme danger in quite a while; I thought it was a trope that had been forgotten.

Overall, this was way better than I expected. Not great, but better than expectations.

Kevin’s Commentary

This wasn’t just an angry deer, it was an angry monstrous deer - gigantic, fast, strong, and fanged. Thanks to a chemical being dumped in the woods that mutated him. It was impressive how some of the people managed to damage each other in the process dealing with Bambi.

The carnivorous, crafty bunnies were a nice touch too. It wasn’t just Bambi who mutated, it was all the little forest creatures.

I was dreading going into it, but I was pleasantly surprised with how entertaining it was. Dumb, but entertaining.

1965 Planet of the Vampires

* Directed by: Mario Bava

* Written by: Renato Pestriniero, Ib Melchior, Alberto Bevilacqua

* Stars: Barry Sullivan, Norma Bengell, Angel Aranda

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

After a crash landing on an alien planet, fixing their ship and taking off again is only one of the problems a crew has to deal with. It’s not quite vampirism despite the title, but the dead rise and there are alien issues. There are some horror elements for sure, but it’s mostly science fiction. The retro-futurism is dialed up to 11 and it’s got a decent story. All in all, we’d call it entertaining fun.

Spoilery Synopsis

We zoom in on a spaceship and then see what’s inside. The bridge crew is all decked out in high-necked black leather uniforms that are a cross between the X-Men and Leather Daddies. They’re picking up strange signals from a point on a nearby planet. Captain Mark Markary calls the other ship, and Mark’s brother starts to say something when the ship loses contact.

Suddenly the gravity goes crazy and everyone experiences 20g as they approach the nearby planet. Somehow, they regain control enough to land on the desolate planet. When they recover, Mark’s crew wakes up and attacks each other.

The ship’s doctor staggers outside, and the atmosphere clears his mind. He doesn’t know why he behaved that way. Mark and Wess inspect their ship outside, and everything looks normal; it was an excellent landing, even if they can’t remember doing it. They find the other ship on their sensors, but can’t tell how badly it’s damaged.

Mark and several of the men go outside and explore the alien, rocky terrain. They get to the other ship, the Galliott, and immediately find a couple of corpses outside; they fought and killed each other. Mark comes to the conclusion that this was all planned… by someone. When they look in through the windows, it appears that they’re all dead inside.

Mark and the others go back to their own ship, the Argos, for tools, and leave Eldon at the other ship to guard the bodies. As soon as they leave he starts hearing voices.

When Mark and the others return, all the bodies are gone, as is Eldon. Also, whatever happened to the signal the ship had been receiving for the past two years? The signal is gone now. The Argos’s solar batteries are drained, so they may not even be able to take off again when the time comes.

Outside, the dead crawl out of their graves and rip off their plastic shrouds. Mark dictates a “captain’s log” but stops when he sees Wess stagger into the ship. Wess tries to disconnect the meteor rejector, but he doesn’t know why when he comes to his senses again. The meteor rejector on the other ship was destroyed– why?

One of their own men, Bert, is killed, and with his dying breath, he accuses Captain Sallis, one of the dead men from the other ship. As everyone discusses the situation, dead Bert opens his eyes and starts to listen. Tiona sees him moving and faints; then the crew buries Bert.

The crew finds the wreckage of another ship, and this one’s been here a long time. They find the skeletal remains of some kind of huge alien. Mark and Sanya go inside, and some of the machinery is still active. They start randomly pushing buttons and hear a recording of what the aliens sounded like. Then the doors close, and they’re trapped inside. They eventually figure out how to open the door again, but when they do, the guard outside, Carter, is gone.

On their return, Tiona reports seeing more of the dead up and walking around. Mark sees Sallis and Keir, two of the men assumed to be dead from the Galliott. Captain Sallis tells his story, and it’s all believable.

Tiona, on the other hand, insists that they are really dead. She insists they open up the graves and check, and they are, in fact, empty.

Meanwhile, Sallis and Keir head straight to the meteor rejector and disable it. When Mark and the others catch Sallis, he admits that he’s not Sallis. Sallis is possessed by another being just using the body. They’re the ones who forced the crew to fight and kill each other so they would have bodies to inhabit. They also sent the signal that brought the humans here. Mark calls them a “breed of parasites,” and Sallis doesn’t like that comparison. They want to go to a more inhabited planet, and they’re holding the meteor rejector hostage. The alien inside Sallis says they can willingly let them in while they are still alive, and it would be a symbiotic relationship, but the humans don’t like that idea.

Mark decides to blow up the Galliott and take off anyway. He and Sonya go over there and find all the dead working on the ship, getting it ready to blast off. With the meteor rejector, they just might be able to do it. They run into Toby, Marks’s brother, and he’s one of the aliens as well now. Mark shoots him dead again.

The living and the possessed have a battle over the Galliot and snatch their meteor rejector while Wess is finishing up repairs on the Argos.

Mark and Sonya run back to their ship and take off immediately. They reinstall the meteor rejector. Wess points out that out of eighteen people, only three are left. Not long afterward, Wess notices that Mark is acting strangely and comes to the conclusion that the captain is possessed as well. He tells Sonya, who picks up a gun on the way to confront Mark. Turns out, both Mark and Sonya are possessed. They intend to go back home and infect the whole planet.

Wess runs to the control room and smashes the meteor rejector, dying in the process. Mark says they’ll never be able to reach home now, but they can make it to this primitive planet the inhabitants call Earth…

The final twist being that the heroes we were rooting for were aliens too.

Brian’s Commentary

It’s no “Forbidden Planet,” but the sets and costumes are on the same par. It’s said to be one of the original influences for “Alien” as well, and several shots and ideas are very similar.

The spaceships are miniatures filmed way too close up, and they don’t look good at all. The planet, while colorfully lit like an episode of “Star Trek,” is hazy, smoky, and effectively creepy and alien. The creatures are more possessed-zombies than actual vampires, but they’re still “undead.”

It’s dated in a 1960’s sci-fi way, being too colorful and sharp, but otherwise, it’s really very good.

Kevin’s Commentary

The space effects aren’t great, but the retro-futurism of the sets, props, and costumes is awesome. I’d barely call it horror, heavily science fiction. Science fiction done the way it was in the 1960s. The story is decent, the cast does a convincing job, and I can see where it might have planted the seeds of “Alien” and some other films that came after this one.

I’m surprised I’ve never seen it before, and I’m glad that I did. I was entertained.

Contact Info:

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Websites:

* https://www.horrorguys.com

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We’ve got an odd assortment for you this week. We’ll watch the new football-horror, “Him” recently released, as well as “Things Will be Different” from just last year. Then we’ll go way back to 1960 and the “Circus of Horrors.” In honor of Udo Keir’s recent death, we’ll watch his two early breakout hits, “Flesh for Frankenstein” and “Blood for Dracula” from the early 70s.

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #51, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 Him

* Directed by: Justin Tipping

* Written by: Skip Bronkie, Zack Akers, Justin Tipping

* Stars: Marlon Wayans, Tyriq Withers, Julia Fox

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 36 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Set in an alternate reality where the NFL is the USFF, we start out with little Cam who has the perfect combination of football obsession at a young age combined with an athletic physique capable of being a world class athlete. As he is groomed to possibly replace a retiring megastar, things get strange and ominous - or maybe he’s just seeing things from stress and head injuries. We both struggled with this because we give no weight or value to football. They take the obsession, the extremes required to stay at the top, idolatry, and cult level fandom to the extreme. Neither of us fault the acting or production values, but we didn’t enjoy it that much.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on Cam, a little boy, watching football on TV. The whole family gets very excited when their team wins. His hero, Isaiah White, gets injured badly. Credits roll.

Fourteen years later, Isaiah is still playing, better than ever, but everyone is talking about when he’ll finally retire - maybe another year at best. Now-adult Cameron Cade is said to be the next star of the game. During an interview with Cam, he says he wants to be the GOAT. One night while practicing, something very strange happens to Cam.

We cut to Cam’s brain scans, and something’s not right. He’s had a traumatic brain injury and a stapled wound on his head. On his return to the game, everyone talks about him surviving the attack. Half the family thinks he isn’t ready, and the other half insists there’s nothing wrong with him. He’s not fine.

Cam wants to be alone and sullen, so he goes to a big party and ignores everyone. Tom, Cam’s manager, calls and says that Isaiah White himself wants to train Cam for a week. On the way there, we see how cult-like some sports fans are.

Cam goes to see Isaiah, who lives in a really cool place. He’s going to put Cam through a special “Boot camp” for football. We then get a training montage. Cam gets a physical exam, and someone steals his underwear. Cam then meets Elise, Isaiah’s wife, who is a power blonde influencer selling jade vaginal eggs and offers Cam one of their anal jades for men before she heads off for travel. Cam talks to Marco, the doctor, about blood transfusions and injections.

On the second day, Isaiah and Cam go for a run in the desert, Cam passes out, and he sees something else that’s weird. Now it’s clear that he’s been hallucinating some of the weirdness we’ve seen. Marco gives him another special shot, and he’s suddenly feeling much better. Then things get weird and they torture a man to motivate Cam to play harder. Afterward, he sits in a hyperbaric chamber for several hours, where he hallucinates some more.

On the third day, they actually play some football, and one of the players gets hurt pretty badly, which seems to be what Isaiah had in mind. More hallucinations ensue– maybe? Did Isaiah really just kill an overzealous fan? That one seemed more real, as well as the aftermath.

The next day, Isaiah and Cam go out to the desert to shoot guns. Cam talks about his father and why he plays the game.

Elsie takes Cam to a party in the city. Marco is there, and he says, “Run!” He meets the owners of the team, and they like him. Meanwhile, Isaiah stays home and works out. There’s more hallucinations, and maybe a ritual of some sort. Maybe Marco loses his head. Stuff happens, and maybe some of it’s real.

On the next day, Cam starts injecting himself. He confronts Isaiah, who talks about generations of blood, a gift from the gods. The blood of their mentors give them the powers of the chosen one. The trick is, there can be only one, and Isaiah’s contract is nearly up. “You’re gonna have to take it from me.” The two men fight to see who really has the killer spirit. Cam has it and uses it.

In a surreal, impossible ceremony, where all the characters gang up on Cam and explain how he’s been groomed all his life for this. Cam instead beats the mascot to death with an ax before killing everyone else with a sword.

And then what?

Brian’s Commentary

What in the hell was that climax???

This is one of those is-it-real-or-a-hallucination stories that we’re so sick of. Cam had a head injury, so all the crazy stuff he sees later on is suspect.

I suspect the filmmaker is trying to show us everything that’s wrong with the mindset around sports obsession, but maybe I’m being charitable with that.

I suppose my problem here is that I have no understanding at all of the screaming, raw, passion and obsession with what is ultimately a pointless game.

The ending was cool and over the top, but it made no real sense at all.

It’s well made, looks great, and the acting is fine. On the other hand, I couldn’t wait until it was over and was bored half to death with it.

Kevin’s Commentary

Well into the movie, I thought there was too much of wondering if things happening are really that strange or if Cam is hallucinating from some combination of stress, obsession, and head injury. Though the effects and visuals are very cool.

As a not-at-all football fan who enjoys watching the spectacle of the Superbowl and really nothing else about the sport, it was hard relating to the passion for the game that so much of the movie revolves around.

Past the halfway point, I started to suspect that the whole thing, or most of it, was real, staged and arranged by Isaiah who is crazy with a God complex. Right from the beginning with the clonk on the head that Cam got. Isaiah thinks he can do or get away with anything, so he does. And with all the “supplements” and substances being administered to Cam, there could easily be hallucinogens in the mix - augmented by a head injury.

I guess in the end, it’s up to the viewer to decide how much of it was real and how much was not. I wouldn’t say I hated the film, but I’d only give it a five or six overall.

2024 Things Will Be Different

* Directed by: Michael Felker

* Written by: Michael Felker

* Stars: Adam David Thompson, Riley Dandy, Chloe Skoczen

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 42 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A pair of siblings go into hiding after a robbery, in a farmhouse that has a time travel feature, which they know about going into. Things get complicated as what they expect to be a short wait turns into a quagmire of overlaps and loops. It’s well made, but too stretched out, and we both thought it would have benefitted from being compacted down. It’s a mystery that unfolds, but neither of us were very satisfied or comprehending of the ending.

Spoilery Synopsis

As the credits roll, we hear a phone call between two people planning a hideaway out of town after some kind of robbery; they’re brother and sister, and there are big bags of money involved.

We cut to Joseph and Sidney meeting in a diner. When they hear a siren passing by, they clear out quickly. They go to the woods, where Joseph knows of a house they can hide in.

They arrive at the house and run off some locals who are there target shooting. The house is trashed inside. They go inside and hear the police approaching. They both know a strange combination trick with the grandfather clocks in the house that unlock a special door. They’ve got a book with instructions along with a phone and some magic-sounding words.

When they come out of the closet, it’s winter outside, and the house is all clean and restored. “Now we wait for time to pass in our present, and when we head back, we’ll be clear. Two weeks and counting.”

The two talk about their lives and about the bar patron who told Joseph about the magical, time-traveling clocks in this house. It’s noticed that there are no cars, no planes, no signs of other people. When it’s time to go back where they came from, they find “Go to the mill” scratched on a wooden sign.

Inside the mill, they find a badly burned corpse. They find another cryptic message that demands their compliance. Sid freaks and runs outside to vomit blood when she crosses the perimeter. The body in the barn was the woman who gave Joseph the book with instructions.

They come into a possession of a tape recorder that allows them to have a conversation with… whoever’s behind all this. The man on the tape wants to “wipe” them, painlessly and instantaneously. The man says there’s someone coming to use the time doorway that they can’t see, and he wants Joe and Sid to kill that person. He sends them pistols.

They set up outside to watch the perimeter, and nothing happens for a long time. On day 352, Sid has researched that the place has been deserted since around 1955. The “Vice Grip” has since used the place as a sort of time-travelling safehouse. She’s had many theories about all this since they’ve been trapped here.

Finally, someone walks across the field toward the house. They get down, loaded with a sniper rifle and aim at Sid. Joe yells, and they both run inside. Joe and the intruder shoot at each other. Sid gets shot in the shoulder as the intruder plays disco music.

As Sid talks to the tape recorder, Joe is elsewhere being tied up and tormented. He tells the tape recorder that the intruder is dead– as the intruder controls the recorder for him.

The intruder makes a run for the house and gets into a fight with Sid. The intruder is finally unmasked, and it’s Steph (her own daughter, grown up). Joe runs in and shoots Sid by mistake as the intruder runs upstairs to the time closet.

Joe goes upstairs to find the time closet has been destroyed. Later, he buries Sid outside. He then meets “The Vice Grips” who want to know about the visitor. Since he failed, they are going to wipe him. They explain that Joe is just a small part in a much bigger project. Joe asks to go back and try again, he can fix the mistakes and get the results they need. “Things will be different.”

The Vice opens a door, and Joe sees that it’s the morning they arrived at the house. And there’s a plane flying overhead. He freely crosses the perimeter. He finds his old self, kills him, and takes his place. He grabs the money and heads off to the diner to meet Sid.

The Vice discusses whether or not he’ll be the first to break the cycle.

Sid arrives at the diner, but it’s not like before. He tells her about how many times he’s tried to fix things (how does she know?). He points her rifle at his head and tells her to end it. We see how old Joe has gotten, his beard is gray.

Brian’s Commentary

The basic plot is interesting with the odd time travel portrayal, but there’s so much waiting and angst that I nodded off at a couple of points. There’s only a cast of two, and they do a fine job; the setting also works well. Still, this feels like a fifteen minute short film with a ton of padding.

It’s very strange, and it’s NOT all clear at the end.

Kevin’s Commentary

It was an interesting take, I thought, having them know about the time traveling aspect of the property before they went to it. It was interesting how the time travel seemed to be a mix of retro tech and magic incantations.

It’s a beautiful location, perfect setting, and good cast. But it’s way too stretched out, with long periods of not much happening. It could have been improved by cutting the length down.

It’s a mystery that only sort of came together at the end. And there were things unexplained. Watching it again would probably make things clearer, but should I really have to do that? I wouldn’t say I disliked it, but I wasn’t very pleased either.

1960 Circus of Horrors

* Directed by: Sidney Hayers

* Written by: George Baxt

* Stars: Anton Diffring, Erika Remberg, Yvonne Monlaur

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A plastic surgeon on the run after a surgery gone bad changes his own face and goes on the run with a couple sidekicks. When they take over a circus as a hiding place with new identities, we continue to see what a bad guy the surgeon is. The horror elements are low-key, it’s much more of a crime drama thriller, but it’s well made. And we thought it was entertaining.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re in England, 1947, and a woman screams as she smashes the mirrors in her room. Two men in a car talk about one of their fiances has gone missing, probably to the cottage after plastic surgery, which is where they are headed. Dr. Rossiter may have experimented on Evelyn. The men break inside as the woman yells “Rossiter” and giggles insanely over her badly mangled face.

Next, we see Dr. Rossiter run down some men on the road who have set up a police blockade and then goes over a cliff. At another cottage, Martin opens the door and badly wounded Rossiter staggers in. He says the operation on Evelyn wasn’t botched, there should have been a sequence of operations, but she panicked and took off her bandages too soon. Still, the law is after him now. He recovers and says he wants to move to France to escape the law. He’s built himself a new face with Martin’s help, and he now calls himself Dr. Bernard Schuler.

“Bernard,” along with Angela and Martin (who are brother and sister), move to France and look for a place to hide out. They stop to ask directions at a circus. The little girl he talks to is all scarred up from a bomb. Bernard talks to Vanet, the owner of the circus, and offers to fix the man’s daughter’s face.

The operation on Vanet’s daughter Nicole proceeds quickly. Bernard removes the bandages, and she looks great. For his next trick, he wants to buy the circus from Vanet; the circus is worthless, and Bernard just wants to use it as a front. Very drunk Vanet signs the contract and then goes outside to abuse the dancing bear who promptly mauls him to death. Bernard didn’t cause it, but he didn’t help rescue him either.

Bernard goes to town and watches as a prostitute stabs and robs a man. She’s got a big scar on her face, and he offers to help her look good again. She’s Elissa, and Angela does not approve of fixing her up. Bernard wants to change criminals’ faces and employ them at the circus. “A circus of criminals? No, a circus of beauty!” he exclaims.

Ten years later, the circus has become very successful. Angela and Martin are still Bernard’s tagalong minions helping run things. Little Nicole has grown up to be one of the star performers, as has Elissa. Elissa complains that she deserves top billing, more so than Magda. Magda, on the other hand, plans to leave at the end of the week and let Nicole replace her. Bernard doesn’t want Magda to leave, since he “made” her.

Tonight is going to be Magda’s “farewell performance,” and Angela warns Bernard that he has to let her go. She gets involved in a knife-throwing, spinning-wheel act. The knives start flying, and at one point, Martin pulls the plug on the spinning wheel, which messes up the speed at just the wrong place so the knife-thrower’s timing is off; she dies.

The police inspector says this place is known as “The Jinx Circus” since there have been so many deaths among the performers. A new woman comes to see the doctor; her face has been burned up with acid. He says she’s going to be his masterpiece.

The whole circus packs up and goes back to England. Crime reporter Desmond immediately takes a liking to Nicole. He wants to write a big expose story about the circus and seems surprised that Bernard and his sidekicks aren’t on board with it. He’s done a lot of research on the many deaths, and he’s starting to catch on. He starts making out with Elissa, and she might tell him what he wants to know.

Desmond learns that all the dead performers had had plastic surgery at some point. He remembers Rossiter, the criminal plastic surgeon from ten years ago. He then talks to Scotland Yard.

Elissa is angry when she sees that Melina, the new girl, has gotten top billing for the show. She threatens to leave if she’s not the star and then she learns about “Rossiter” by eavesdropping on Desmond and Nicole. She threatens Bernard with exposing the secret, which seems like a bad idea when she knows how many “accidents” there have been.

Soon after, someone sneaks a snake into Elissa’s room. She screams, but she’s all right. She knows who did it and threatens to talk to Desmond after the show tonight. Bernard tells Martin to take care of it. During Elissa’s act, Martin messes with the rope, and she falls to her death.

Desmond and the chief know that Bernard is Rossiter, but they can’t prove it. Desmond suggests bringing in Evelyn from the opening scene.

That night, Bernard himself is attacked by a gorilla and gets some deep scratches on his face. He wants Martin and Angela to repair his face like before. He also announces that he’s marrying Melina, which really angers Angela.

Evelyn comes to the circus and looks at Bernard, whose face is half covered in a bandage. She recognizes his ring, which we hadn’t seen before. He knows who she is as well, and he knows that she knows. Martin and Angela want out, but he won’t allow that.

Tonight is Melina’s big act; she’s his masterpiece, and she’ll be in the lion’s cage. The lions, of course, will be sedated by Martin, who very well might double-cross his boss. As Melina goes into the cage for the act, Martin pulls Angela aside; they’re leaving. The lions are frisky because Martin didn’t sedate them properly, and she quickly figures that out. When she falls down, the lions are all over her.

Bernard/Rossiter catches Martin and Angela leaving and fights with them. He stabs Angela, but Martin releases the angry gorilla who hates Bernard. The police nab Martin, and the gorilla nabs Rossiter.

Meanwhile, crazy Evelyn steals a car and goes back to the circus. Injured Rossiter attacks Desmond as Nicole watches. As he makes his escape, Evelyn runs over him with her car. He dies.

Brian’s Commentary

Apparently, plastic surgery could be done on a coffee table in the 60s. The special effects for the various characters’ scars are very good. A lot of the plot itself doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but it’s entertaining throughout.

It’s… alright. Not great.

Kevin’s Commentary

I thought the Elissa and Nicole actresses look too much alike. Then they brought in Melina for further confusion.

It’s really a suspenseful crime drama and barely horror. The doctor is a bad guy with a giant sized ego that lets him think he can get away with anything, which is his downfall.

All that aside, I thought the movie was well put together and entertaining.

1973 Flesh For Frankenstein

* AKA “Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein” and “Frankenstein 3D”

* Directed by: Antonio Margheriti, Paul Morrissey

* Written by: Paul Morrisey, Tonino Guerra, Pat Hackett

* Stars: Joe Dallesandro, Udo Kier, Dalila De Lazzaro

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a strange and raunchy version of the Frankenstein story with lots of dark humor. The doctor creates a male and female at the same time with the intention of breeding a personal race of beings that will obey only him. The visuals, script, and direction are interesting and the cast is a collection of strange characters. We both thought it was offbeat, weird, and entertaining.

Spoilery Synopsis

As the credits roll, we watch a little boy and girl, Erik and Monica, “operate” on a doll and put it in a guillotine. Later, we see the two children in a carriage with their mother, Baroness Katrin Frankenstein. Up at the castle, Baron Frankenstein yells at Otto about not keeping the lab clean.

We cut to the lab, where Frankenstein has created a perfect woman to accompany his perfect man. No– the men he’s been working on are all just bits and pieces. He talks to his wife/sister about sending the children away to school, but she doesn’t approve.

Two young farmhands talk about Sascha wanting to become a monk. One of them is Nicholas, and Katrin calls him out for messing with all the women. She tells him to report to her at the castle tomorrow morning.

Meanwhile, Frankenstein tells Otto that he needs to find the head of a male who loves women a whole bunch. He needs to be the start of a whole new race. He tells a story about his visit to a whorehouse when he was young. What he really needs is… a Serbian!

Meanwhile, at the whorehouse in town Sascha and Nicholas arrive and want to play. Sascha’s not really interested in the girls; he only has eyes for Nicholas. The baron and Otto stand outside to see who comes out. They take one look at Sascha and decide that his head is the one they want. They soon take him by surprise and take his head with a big, curved hedge-trimmer.

The two villains head back to their lab and connect the head to the already-assembled man’s body they’ve been building.

Nicholas reports to the baroness as ordered. She has a job for him… in the bedroom.

The scientists work on the woman, and she wakes up– until Frankenstein pulls out her organs and apparently orgasms. He puts her organs back inside and then just has regular sex with her. “Why are you looking at me, you filthy thing? Turn around!” he commands. “To know death is to f**k life– right in the gallbladder!”

Frankenstein and Otto turn on the electricity, and both his creatures wake up. The next project will be to reduce the gestation period so their offspring will grow more quickly.

We cut to the dining room, where Frankenstein, his wife, and children are served by Nicholas. Otto brings in the two creatures to sit at the table for dinner with the family. It’s awkward and ridiculous.

The monster, with Sascha’s head and brain, still has eyes for Nicholas, who clearly recognizes him. Katrin explains that she doesn’t know much about what her husband does, and he wants to check out the laboratory himself.

Meanwhile, in the lab, Erik and Monica play with a disembodied hand and watch a beating heart. When their father shows up, they clear right out.

The servant, Olga, comes into the lab, looking for the children, and finds the man and woman. Before she can do anything, Otto catches her and chases her into the torture chamber, where he has his way with her. He rips her open and pulls her guts out.

It’s finally time to make the two creatures mate. She kisses him, but he doesn’t respond. She looks good, but since he’s playing for the wrong team, he isn’t aroused. Frankenstein takes the failure badly. He blames his wife.

Nicholas breaks into the lab and talks to Sascha’s head, which is on a much taller body now. Sascha speaks; he doesn’t really care about his life, he just wants to be dead. Nicholas starts to lead them outside, but Frankenstein and Otto intervene. They knock out Nicholas and plan to use his head on the monster next. Katrin shows up, and she’s fine with all of it.

Katrin decides she wants to have sex with the monster, and Frankenstein is willing to let her try. The two go off to her bedroom and get to work. They start making out, but then she tells him to squeeze her tight, and he does– until she can’t breathe and dies.

Downstairs, Otto tears open the woman creature as restrained Nicholas is forced to watch. Frankenstein comes in, sees what happened, and kills Otto. The male creature carries Katrin in at this point. The monster then turns on Frankenstein, who loses his hand before getting impaled. He still manages to give a speech before dying.

Sascha/The Monster says he’d rather be dead than go on like this. He tears himself open, and all his innards fall out on the floor.

The two children come in and find Nicholas still tied up as they look at the pile of dead bodies. They each pick up a scalpel and move in toward Nicholas…

Brian’s Commentary

Although it’s called “Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein,” Andy Warhol really had nothing to do with any of it other than a few visits to the set. They only used his name for advertising purposes, although there is a great deal of gaudy, tacky artworks on the walls.

There are some interesting gore effects, although the color and consistency of the “blood” doesn’t hold up. It took us a long while to put two and two together to see that Frankenstein and Katrin were brother and sister as well as husband and wife; it’s no wonder the kids can’t speak. It was filmed in 3D, and there are some really obvious shots designed to take advantage of that.

This one is gory, sexy, funny, and just plain weird. All kinds of weird. It’s not exactly what I’d call good, but it’s definitely unusual.

Kevin’s Commentary

I’d seen this before and enjoyed it just as much this time around. Everything about it is just weird and slightly off, with a 70s vibe running through it, and that’s what makes it good. It’s weird, gross, creepy, and funny all at once.

1974 Blood for Dracula

* AKA “Andy Warhol’s Dracula”

* Directed by: Paul Morrissey

* Written by: Paul Morrissey, Pat Hackett, Bram Stoker

* Stars: Joe Dallesandro, Udo Kier, Vittorio De Sica

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 46 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Sickly Dracula must have virgin blood to survive, and Italy is the only place he can find one in these modern times. So he and his faithful servant set off on a road trip to find one. It’s another strange take on a classic horror tale, with plenty of dark humor. It’s a little on the long and slow side, but we still both enjoyed it.

Spoilery Synopsis

We watch as Count Dracula puts on his makeup and paints his blonde hair black. Anton, Dracula’s servant, says there’s not much time, and Dracula will need to relocate to Italy, where they have lots of virgins. If he doesn’t get the blood of a virgin within two weeks, both he and his sister will die. Dracula doesn’t want to leave the castle, but he doesn’t have much choice. They put his sickly sister into her coffin; she can’t go along with them.

In Italy, a bunch of girls work in their garden, and since it’s hot, Rubunia and Saphiria decide to go topless. Mario, the Italian servant, has a very New York accent.

Dracula and Anton stop at a place to rent a room for the night. The landlady remarks on how thin and sickly Dracula looks, and they don’t have any food that Dracula can eat. They talk about one of the Di Fiore family who have four daughters that might be virgins, and this interests Anton a lot.

The Marquis Di Fiore and his wife discuss the rich new count who has arrived in town. The family needs money, so maybe they could marry off one of their useless daughters. Anton shows up at the door with a deal. The family offers them rooms at their huge house. The Marquis really liked the name “Dracula” and can barely stop saying it.

On the way out, Anton stops at a restaurant and likes a girl he sees there. She gets hit by a car, and Anton soaks up a bunch of her blood in a piece of bread. It’s tasty!

At the big house, Saphiria and Rubinia make love to Mario, as a group, so they clearly aren’t virgins. He points out that the family is broke and they’re about to lose everything. He prefers their 14-year-old sister, Esmerelda.

Dracula arrives at the house and makes introductions with all the girls. The girls wonder about the count. Anton and Mario clearly hate each other.

Saphiria brings Dracula some vegetables to eat in his room, and he talks to her about marriage. And tries to confirm if she’s a virgin or not. When she says that she is, he bites her. And quickly regrets it as he turns green and violently vomits it back up. Meanwhile, Mario makes love to another of the sisters as they discuss aristocracy and the lower classes.

Dracula rejects Saphiria for not being a virgin. Mario and Dracula argue over Communism, revolutions, and the aristocracy. Rubinia and Perla talk about Mario, Sex, and married life. Not long after, Dracula tests (and tastes) Rubinia, who also lies about her virginity. Again, he gets sick and it all comes back up.

Since neither of the middle daughters are actually virgins, Anton says they’re going back to Romania. He hints that the youngest daughter might be suitable and leaves it hanging at that. A bit later, Dracula comments on how run down and shabby everything is, pointing out the family’s poverty to Esmerelda. They talk and she mentions a long engagement that didn’t work out, so Dracula just assumes she isn’t a virgin.

Mario gets nosy and checks out the coffin, which he finds empty. He suddenly knows all about vampires. Rubinia and Saphirira check Perla and decide that she is a virgin; they try to take her to the count. She runs away into Mario, who tells her about vampires. He says she needs to lose her virginity before Dracula gets her, and then he makes it happen. The Marquesa soon learns about the vampire, as does everyone else. Esmerelda comes in, and she’s not feeling well. No one notices the scarf around her neck. Or the smile she gives the Count. Apparently she was a virgin after all.

Meanwhile, Dracula and Anton carry the coffin back out to the car, at least until Mario smashes it with an ax. Anton stabs the Marquesa, who shoots him in the back. Mario cuts off both Dracula’s arms and chases him around the house. Then he cuts his legs off. Finally, as he’s about to stake Dracula through the heart, Esmerelda runs out screaming. “No! He belongs to me!” She jumps on the stake as well.

Mario and Perla go back inside.

Brian’s Commentary

They don’t have a single virgin in Romania?

Just as with the Frankenstein film, Andy Warhol had nothing to do with this other than letting the producers use his name.

Dracula here goes out in the daytime and touches the cross, although he’s not happy to do either. He refuses to eat garlic.

It’s got plenty of funny bits, but it’s nowhere near as over-the-top as “Flesh for Frankenstein” which shared much of the same cast and crew. The four sisters all look too similar, so it’s a little hard to tell them apart, and the acting, all around, is exaggerated and more than a little hammy.

Kevin’s Commentary

I wonder why Dracula bothered using a mirror while putting on makeup in the opening credits. Though it was a good way to let us know right off the bat he’s a vampire. And speaking of bats, this version doesn’t seem to be able to shape shift. Though he’s also not too bothered by crosses or sunlight. And he does seem to have hypnotic power over women he’s bitten.

This has a lot of the vibe, and same cast, as “Flesh For Frankenstein,” but it’s more slow moving and not quite the same level of weirdness. It is still strange and pretty funny though.

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Mostly all new films this time around, and they’re all pretty good!

We will start off with “Shelby Oaks,” then have no choice but to take a look at “Compulsion.” “Alma and the Wolf” will be stopping by before “Operation Undead” occurs. All of these are new-ish 2025 films. Lastly, we’ll watch the final film of the second Godzilla era, “Godzilla Vs Destoroyah” from 1995.

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #50, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 Shelby Oaks

* Directed by: Chris Stuckman

* Written by: Sam Liz, Chris Stuckman

* Stars: Camille Sullivan, Sarah Durn

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 31 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a mix of documentary, found footage, and standard movie format that mixes the three smoothly together. After a quartet of paranormal investigators vanish, the sister of one of them starts an obsessive investigation of her own looking for answers. She finds some, and it’s thoroughly creepy. We both thought the movie improved as it went along, with a stronger second half, and we give it a thumbs up.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re told that Riley, the host of “Paranormal Paranoids,” went missing in 2008. We watch an old video of her talking about being scared. That was the last time anyone saw her alive. In Darke County Ohio, we hear news reports about Riley and her whole team going missing. Could it have been a hoax?

Mia, Riley’s sister, has been searching for her for the past twelve years. We cut to people talking about this new thing called YouTube, and how it created a whole new type of paranormal researcher. We watch one old clip that took place in an abandoned prison, and Riley was never the same afterward. They never really got famous until their disappearance.

The last evidence of the group was at a place called Shelby Oaks, a modern ghost town. Eventually three of the team were found, dead and mutilated, but Riley’s body was not found. We see that clip again, and this time, we see a creepy figure standing outside the window behind Riley. “Mia, he’s back,” she said. Mia talks about Riley’s visions from when she was little.

As the interviewer and Mia finish up, a man comes to the door. “She finally let me go,” he says before shooting himself in the head. Credits roll. In his hand is a tape labelled “Shelby Oaks,” and Mia steals it.

Mia watches the tape, which contains missing footage from Riley’s camera. Riley introduces the town of Shelby Oaks, but then gets all serious and wants to leave. She mentions having a dream about the place. They explore the place, but that night, there are weird sounds outside the buildings; howling and whining, like animals. We then see the man who killed himself on their doorstep come into the building and kill some of the crew.

Mia sees someone standing outside looking in her window– on the second floor. Riley used to talk about the same thing happening.

Detective Burke tells Mia about Wilson Miles, the man who did the killings. Mia still doesn’t tell the police about the tape. She wants to investigate on her own. Miles had been incarcerated in that old haunted prison as well, so that’s all connected. She interviews the former warden of the prison, who talks about how oddly quickly the prison deteriorated after Wilson Miles arrived there. The place literally rotted.

Mia tells her husband Robert more of her suspicions, and yes, she’s seen the thing at the window a few times. The thing out there wanted something from Riley, and it’d been stalking her all her life, minus the few years when Miles was in prison. Robert thinks Mia needs psychiatric help.

Mia reads about Incubuses and other demons. The pictures look familiar. Later, she sees a demon dog outside on the street. She decides, in the middle of the night, to drive right over to the abandoned CGI prison and break in, alone. Without telling anyone where she’s gone. She tracks down Wilson Miles’s prison cell and it abruptly gets very cold. Suddenly, her flashlight goes out and she sees some surprising things. She wastes no time in leaving the prison.

She then drives to the old amusement park and encounters the demon dog again. This time, it leads her into the woods to a house where an old woman lives. She’s Norma. Mia notices that the house is covered in mold and rot, just like the prison. Norma says she lives with her son, who turns out to be Wilson Miles. Mia’s creeped out and sends Robert a text to call the police to her location.

She finds photos of Wilson and Riley together, and she doesn’t look happy about it. Oh, and she’s pregnant in the photos. Norma comes out and opens a trap door on the floor and leads the way in. In a cell down there, Mia sees Riley, alive. It also becomes clear that old Norma isn’t human at all, or perhaps is just a human shell.

Riley runs upstairs and Mia chases after her. They hear a baby crying and go into the room. Norma is there praying to Tarion, the Incubus of the North. She blesses the baby in his name. There are photos on the wall of Riley, Robert, Mia, and they’re all covered in blood. When the ritual is over, Norma falls to the floor, apparently dead. The baby, on the other hand, looks just fine.

Mia takes Riley to the hospital. After twelve years, the news is all over the story. Eventually, they take Riley home, but she’s not adjusting well and is very quiet. “It has to die,” she says about the baby. The two sisters struggle, and Riley gets knocked out a window, where she’s torn apart by devil dogs. We get a good glimpse of Tarion standing behind Mia. Then it puts a hand on her shoulder.

Mia then explains that Tarion had been following Riley for decades; this is what it’s always wanted. She screams, and we see that her eyes are glowing now.

Brian’s Commentary

A lot of the beginning is found footage, but it moves away from that as Mia starts investigating. After that point, it starts picking up and gets good. I liked the last half quite a bit. The sets, music, lighting, and pacing all lend themselves to a very suspenseful mystery. You see just enough to know what’s going on, but they don’t beat you over the head with monsters and gore.

It’s very good!

Kevin’s Commentary

Hmmm. A found footage documentary movie where a quartet of supernatural investigators have vanished. Will it be good or show us something new? Yes, it was quite good and unique enough to entertain me. I was pleased.

The CGI when it’s used is pretty obvious, but the real abandoned locations, the interior of the prison, the town, the amusement park, were perfect.

An interesting bit of trivia on IMDB.com says “In one of the posters promoting the movie, there are the names of all people contributing to the movie hidden in the poster. There were over 14,000 people included in (sic) making of the movie (including crowdfunding).”

Oof. Sometimes the dragon wins as the saying goes.

2025 Compulsion

* Directed by: Neil Marshall

* Written by: Charlotte Kirk, Neil Marshall

* Stars: Charlotte Kirk, Matthew Camilleri, Zach McGowan

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 41 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

There’s a masked and disguised killer on the loose in Malta who does brutal work. It has a hint of the horror elements, but really it’s a sexy and violent murder mystery. The deaths are very bloody, a contrast to the beautiful people and settings. And the script is clever but flawed. We both thought it was entertaining, but had some issues.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on various shots in and around Malta. Someone in a black outfit climbs the ladder on the side of a building at night. They break in through a balcony and skulk around. The person in black watches as the man who lives in the house gets ready for a shower. Then the intruder slashes the man to death excessively. We pull back and see that the killer is a woman in a full-body BDSM suit.

Detective Claudia arrives on the scene. The chief explains the case to her; she’s never done a case like this before, so he assigns her to Detective Crawford as a partner. Also, the chief is her father.

Evie is on vacation in Malta, just arrived, and she gets an annoying taxi driver. She’s got a rich father, whose isolated country home she’s going to stay at, and an attitude. She listens to neighbor Diane and her boyfriend, Reese, arguing from quite a ways away.

Evie runs into Diane at the local store, and they talk. Meanwhile, the two detectives look at security footage of the bondage-killer; the killer is probably not one of the locals. Diane tells Evie about the murderer on the ride back home. Evie mentions that she just broke up with her girlfriend.

Back at the house, neighbor Reese invites Evie out for dinner tomorrow night. Evie notices that she can see through to their windows from her room and really likes what she sees.

Later, Diane and Reese talk about Evie’s rich father and how to get his money. Reese planned to seduce Evie, but she’s a lesbian, so that’s not gonna fly. They need to devise a new plan, so the next day, Diane goes to see Evie at her house. We get a flashback to Diane watching Evie’s stepfather, Mason, getting into the safe. She scopes out the lock on the safe as Evie gets dressed. Then Diane works on seducing Evie, which isn’t especially hard.

Reese goes to see some baddies about the money he owes, and the boss, Fabio, isn’t nice about it. Final warning. He’s got a week before the boss lets a henchman skin him alive.

The two detectives show up to question Evie, since she’s a recent arrival to Malta who fits the demographic of the killer. They tell her not to leave the island. They go to Diana’s house right afterward. The police have found several similar murders in neighboring countries over the past few months.

Diane and Evie go out for dinner, and run into the annoying cab driver. The outing does not go well for any of them. When they get home, Diane learns the security code for Evie’s house entrance.

We cut to the killer’s point of view as she walks through a house with a big knife. It’s the annoying cab driver’s house, and she stabs him to death with one of Evie’s swords.

Diane and Reese argue about who’s seducing whom. Evie overhears Reese talking about needing money badly. When he threatens to mess up everything, she stabs him. That doesn’t do much, but then Evie shows up and they tag team stab him repeatedly in a messy fight. He dies hard.

Diane says they could just make Reese disappear and not mention any of this to the police. They wrap up the body and dump it in the ocean. We see someone is watching them from a distance. Then they make out in the hot tub as they wash the blood off each other.

In the morning, someone sends a video of them loading the corpse into their car last night. It’s blackmail for $100,000 worth.

The two cops get called to Madam Karmelina’s annual masquerade, as there was a report of someone dressed like the murderer showing up there. The two girls are there as well to meet the blackmailer. Everyone there is dressed sexy, so the murderer’s bondage suit doesn’t really stand out. The girls spot their pool boy, who must be the blackmailer.

Someone then follows the pool boy into the bathroom, kills him, smashes his phone with the blackmail video on it, and throws it in the toilet before leaving. The police jump into action, and the two girls rush to get away. There are too many deaths connected to Evie and Diana to be a coincidence.

The police return with a search warrant and soon find one of Evie’s father’s swords missing - clearly the murder weapon used on the driver. Diana calls Mason, Evie’s stepfather, about the trouble; he needs to come to Malta, which is exactly what Diana needs to get into the biometric locked safe. She also texts Claire, Evie’s former girlfriend and hears Claire’s phone pinging upstairs. Upon investigating further, Diana finds Claire’s head in a suitcase. Diana then decides to leave town– no, on second thought, Mason is arriving, and she can use him to open the safe.

Evie gets released under house arrest and goes home, where Diana is waiting for her. When Diana tells Evie that Mason is on the way, she is not happy.

After thinking it over, Detective Claudia decides that Diana is the serial killer and heads over there. She soon learns the truth of the matter– Evie is the killer. Diana and Evie play cat and mouse throughout the big house for a while until it all comes down to a– sword fight. Suddenly, Mason and Evie’s mother show up.

Evie confronts her parents about her motivations. Then she shoots them both. Evie runs away, leaving Diana alone with the bodies. Diana cuts out Mason’s eye, which allows her to open and rob the safe, full of lots of goodies and cash.

Detective Crawford arrives outside the house and finds what’s left. He has his people arrest Evie on the way to the docks. When the chief finds out that Evie killed his daughter, he rushes right over to the hospital where she is, with Crawford not far behind. The chief ends up getting shot, which makes Evie smile.

We cut to Diana, now with a new hair color and on an expensive-looking boat, as she leaves Malta for good.

Brian’s Commentary

There are numerous bloody murders, a head in a suitcase, and some extreme fights, but calling this one horror may be a stretch. It’s a sort of whodunnit, but we really don’t get many clues as to the murderer’s identity. In the end, it somewhat makes sense, but there are several plot holes that we both picked up on right away.

Still, it was interesting all the way through and was well shot and looked good throughout. Some of the actors’ accents were pretty bad, but that’s just the way some international films are.

It’s pretty decent, but not really horror.

Kevin’s Commentary

Definitely low on horror and high on the murder mystery drama. And sex. This one had me guessing right up to the reveal what was really going on.

So, they dressed up sexy and revealing and went to a costume party. Upstairs in the bathroom, the fully gimped killer takes out the blackmailing pool boy and destroys his phone with the video of them hauling out Reese’s body. Which only the two main characters knew about, so it had to be one of them? But no, because very soon, they are still dressed revealingly and leaving. Point one, that was way too little time to get in and out of that gimp rubber outfit. And point two, where did Evie have it stashed? Up her butt? I thought it was well made overall, but this and a few other points troubles me.

So, I’m going to say it’s very well made, well acted, and well directed. But I had some issues with the script.

2025 Alma and the Wolf

* Directed by: Michael Patrick Jann

* Written by: Abby Miller

* Stars: Ethan Embry, Li Jun Li, Jeremie Harris

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 29 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A police officer with personal issues responds to a wolf attack. And things get more complicated from there when he, and us, start having a hard time telling what’s real and what’s going on. The acting is good, the effects are very cool, it’s short and moves well. Things are strange, but mostly explained in the end. We both liked it very much.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re in the Pacific Northwest for this one. The sheriff’s deputy, Ren, stands on the seashore carrying a red balloon. He gets a call and goes to investigate. On the way, he passes a girl walking on the side of the road, and she’s not looking so well. He recognizes Alma and takes her in for questioning. Ren assumes she was raped, but she calls him a dummy and says her dog was killed. A wolf and a bunch of goats did it, but she was drunk, so who knows. Eventually, he gets the full story out of her, and it’s weird. Ren explains that wolves are protected, and killing one is a felony.

Alma and Ren used to be a thing back in high school; neither is looking too successful at the moment. He promises to kill the wolf for her. Ren goes to his son Jack’s game, and it’s clear that none of the townspeople much like him. Jack’s mother Connie is there too, and she hates Ren as well. There’s a whole custody argument.

That night, Ren goes off looking for the wolf that killed Alma’s dog. He finds the goats she described, but they aren’t normal goats. He also finds Alma’s dog’s leash. When he sees the wolf, he fires his gun. Then he sees it turn into a wolf-man. “I am the wolf and you are the weasel,” it says before it charges at him. Still, he’s pretty drunk, so who knows?

In the morning, the sheriff mentions that the lieutenant position is up between Ren and Murph. Murph brings in banana bread for the boss. Alma comes in, looking much cleaner, and wants to hear about the wolf last night. She guilt-trips him into a date. Jack comes over and talks about a talent scout that saw him at the big game.

The date with Alma goes really well. Elsewhere, the wolf-man attacks Jack.

In the morning, Ren gets the call about Jack going missing. He didn’t show up to school this morning and his dog was found dead. His meeting with the sheriff and Murph doesn’t go well because Connie keeps attacking Ren. As they all leave, Ashley, the town drunk, pukes all over Ren’s shoes.

Ren and Murph go for a drive, and they’re attacked by goats. Ren thinks the goats will lead him to Jack, but Murph isn’t too supportive. Night falls, and they get lost. Murph explains that he’s a pacifist and doesn’t even load his gun. Jack dreams about the wolfman and goatmen, now giant-sized. He sees Alma, “Search the trees.” Then he gets a vision of Jack in the lake.

In the morning, Ren gets divers to search the lake, but there’s no one there. The sheriff thinks Ren is losing his mind.

When Ren gets home, he finds Alma making scary meatloaf. She believes him about the wolf, which leads to sex. Ren tells her all about his life and feelings about Jack. Then he gets a call from Alma; she wasn’t with him at all last night– it was a flaming goat!

Ren runs over to Alma’s house and finds the nasty neighbor, Betty, outside the house. He shoots her. He then runs to the police station, and they say they found old Ashley in the woods with his head bashed in. Jack’s blood was on him. Everyone in town is starting to get sick, including the sheriff’s daughter.

Murph and the sheriff arrest Ren for murdering Ashley and Jack. Ren denies it. They have fingerprints, and they aren’t taking his explanation seriously. “He’s coming for all of you,” Pam screams before splitting open and releasing a goatman which attacks Murph.

Ren and the sheriff barricade themselves in an interrogation room as the goatmen try to break in. Then, the sheriff changes as well. Ren slips out the air duct while the sheriff holds the baddies off.

Ren drives out to the woods and confronts the wolf about Jack. We then get a flashback to what happened to Jack. He ran into Ren on his walk and they argued about Ren’s drinking. Ren wanted to go swimming at the lake, and Jack couldn’t say no. It’s really cold, and Ren wants to play “Wolf and Weasel.” This goes badly, as Ren ends up drowning Jack. Ashley came upon them and Ren ended up killing him too. “You are the wolf,” says the wolf.

Ren wakes up in the morning with a terrible hangover, but he now remembers what happened. He finds Jack’s corpse in his back room just as the whole police force comes to the door.

Alma, as it turns out, is one of the deputies, and she asks him what happened. We see the opening scenes again how it actually was, with her as the cop finding him walking down the road. Back in the now, he sees the wolf with the cops, and it goads him into grabbing for a gun, which ends the movie. Alma shoots Ren.

Brian’s Commentary

It’s a weird “What’s going on here?” kind of story. Is this all real, or is Ren losing his mind? Or is it something else entirely? It’s a mystery that doesn’t seem at all real, but then again, maybe it is. Ren is damaged goods, and Ethan Embry does really well with the tormented character.

The bits with the wolf, wolfman, and goats are really cool-looking. It could probably be debated that this isn’t a horror movie, but I liked it quite a bit.

Kevin’s Commentary

Despite the title, there wasn’t all that much Alma. It’s more like Ren and his Angst and the Wolf.

I was expecting something like a standard werewolf fare, but this was more strange and complicated than that. The animal/human hybrid prosthetics and effects were very cool. And I thought the cast, led by Ethan Embry, does a nice job.

The tragic explanation of things at the end was not what I expected.

Overall, I’d give it a thumbs up.

2025 Operation Undead

* Directed by: Khom Kongkiat Khomsiri

* Written by: Khom Kongkiat Khomsiri

* Stars: Thawatchanin Darayon, Akkarat Nimitchai, Seigi Ozeki

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 50 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Early in WWII, the Japanese bring an experimental biological weapon to their frenemy Thailand. We can’t fault how it’s made, the acting and effects are all great. And there is a complete and kind of poignant story. But it was too long and drawn out, we both thought, and we found ourselves bored for some of it.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open in Thailand during World War II. The Junior soldiers all get their photos taken and introduce themselves. They sneak up on a tent where another junior soldier is having sex with a prostitute they pay their fee and go in as well. The captain shows up and catches them all in the act. They all run away, but he catches them and they all have fun at the beach.

Mek, one of the soldiers, hears from his girlfriend, Pen, that he’s going to be a father. He asks her to marry him; he’s already got a ring and everything. Suddenly, a man runs up and says he’s seen a bunch of iron ships with guns just over the horizon. The enemy is about to attack.

The leadership discusses war strategy and talks about a special weapon they’ve been developing. We see grainy footage of what appears to be a man becoming a zombie. They will use it as a last resort.

Mek and his brother Mok are called to duty; their father has already been killed. Mok wants to run away to a friend’s house, but Mek wants to serve his country as a patriot.

There’s a pretty major battle. Afterward, we see a crate on the shore with a zombie inside. Mok did go to fight, and now he’s regretting it. After avoiding the zombies, he dies in quicksand– Nope– he’s rescued by the zombies, who eat him.

The Japanese soldiers come ashore and survey the area. There sure are a lot of bones in camp. They soon spot some zombies, shoot some, and pursue the rest into the jungle. These are fast zombies, and it doesn’t take long for them to turn the tables.

Mek is on patrol and comes into the now-deserted camp. He finds another soldier down in a pit and descends to help. He soon finds that the man’s got no face; it’s been eaten off. He burns up the man and then reports what he saw.

Mok wakes up with the other zombies, and we see things from his point of view. At the hospital, another soldier tells Mek that Mok was with his unit. Elsewhere, the scientists involved with the experiment kill themselves for honor. The soldiers are told about the infected man who escaped, but that’s not who Mok saw in the woods, so it must be spreading. Captain Nakamura has been assigned to apprehend them– alive.

Elsewhere, Mok remembers eating a child. He puts a pistol to his head, but then gets a flare-up that makes him self-combust. He bursts into flames. “The Fumetsu is flammable, but will it continue to evolve?”

Mok wakes up in a cave later; he’s hard to kill. Not far off, Nakamura cuts himself to allow the blood to draw in the zombies. Mok hallucinates a woman who sings to him.

The colonel has one of the Fumetsu in a cage and tortures it for the location of the others, which he gets. He then shoots it repeatedly, but it won’t die. They pump him full of cyanide, and Mek objects to that. It still doesn’t die.

The “zombies” sit in their cave and complain about what they’ve become. Yes, they can talk and communicate with each other. Mok sings to them, and they’re all very sad.

In the village, a shaman is doing a prayer dance but falls down in a seizure. The zombies come out of the woods and attack the villagers. Mok and Mek’s mother prays for her sons, not seeing one of them shambling toward the house. Mek shows up and explains that Mok is still alive, sort of. Mok is hiding in the woods and hears all this.

One of the zombies, Sak, runs into his wife and daughter in the woods, and they all recognize each other. He doesn’t hurt them, but the army does, which really gets him angry. This results in a shootout. Mek arrives just in time to see all the non-infected men die.

Mek shoots Mok, who falls off a cliff. Another zombie jumps out of nowhere and attacks Mek who also becomes infected.

The chief scientist explains that the infected will all eventually self-destruct, and then the ash will help nature renew itself. He doesn’t seem to think the soldiers will be able to beat the Fumatsu.

Nakamura and the Japanese plan to kill all the villagers to eliminate all the eyewitnesses.

There is much roaring and debate amongst the zombies in the caves. Saks comes in and tells the others of Nakamura’s plan to kill their families. Mek and Mok argue about what to do to save their mother.

Soon, the zombies come to the villagers, and they all recognize each other. Nakamura orders them all to be shot. Mek watches as the pregnant Pen dies and raises a counterattack. The undead start to bite Pen and the other dying people so they can “survive.”

Mek makes a plan to lure all the Japanese to the cave and kill them all. Nakamura kills the head scientist and reads the part in his notes about how the Fumetsu are flammable. He calls for a flamethrower.

Mok gets a vision of his dead family, dissolves into dust, but then re-forms, looking much healthier now.

There’s a drawn-out battle in the caves, and most of the soldiers die. Nakamura paints himself with mud, thinking the undead can’t see him. They do see him, and he doesn’t last long after that.

Mok stumbles in and picks up the flamethrower. He waits at the cave’s entrance and blasts them all on the way out. The flaming zombies then run back inside to tackle Nakamura’s zombies, and they all burn. Mok runs into the flames as well, so basically, everyone dies and the infection is eradicated.

Brian’s Commentary

We don’t see many views of WWII that aren’t from the viewpoint of one of the major powers, so this Thailand film was interesting for that alone.

These are definitely the brain-eating zombie variety, and fast ones at that. Even more important, these zombies can talk and organize, which is pretty unique. It’s got some pretty good gore effects as the zombies eat through people’s heads.

On the other hand, it’s very long and drawn-out. I literally caught myself dozing off at a couple of points.

Kevin’s Commentary

I’m sure I’ve never seen a Thai WWII film before.

This was kind of interesting how the zombified soldiers can still sort of talk and think and remember. But the movie started feeling long after the infection kicked in and things dragged on a bit in the middle. Okay, it drags a lot. The gore is over the top when it happens, and it’s technically well made, but it ended up being on the dull side overall, I thought.

1995 Godzilla vs Destoroyah

* Directed by: Ishiro Honda, Takao Okawara, Koji Hashimoto

* Written by: Kaoru Kamigiku, Koichi Kawakita, Yosuke Nakano

* Stars: Takuro Tatsumi, Yoko Ishimo, Yusufumi Hayashi

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 43 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This one starts right off the bat with creature action and doesn’t let up. There’s Godzilla, and other creatures, and humans with a new super-duper fighting ship. It was the last movie of the Heisei Era, until the next era started in 1999, and it was a worthy finish. Lots of action and entertainment.

Spoilery Synopsis

A plane spots Godzilla out in the ocean, and he seems to be on fire. He soon shows up in Tokyo and starts his usual hijinks. Except this time, he’s glowing, all over and making steam. Credits roll.

We waste no time getting back to Tokyo’s destruction. Scientists convene and talk about how he looks so different now. The Americans explain that Godzilla’s internal nuclear reactor has gone haywire. Kenichi Yemane came up with the theory, and we soon get to meet him. He’s some kind of misunderstood genius, and the son of a Godzilla expert. He refuses to go work at G-Force until he finds out that Miki is working there, and then he’s all on board.

We cut to a man being interviewed about his invention, a device that makes tiny micro-oxygen atoms. It could be used as a weapon, but he just wants to use it to make larger fish. The interviewer is Yukari, Kenichi’s sister. His aunt wants to talk about Serizawa’s work from the very first movie, who invented an oxygen bomb weapon to use against Godzilla. Dr. Ijuin knows his work is similar to Serizawa’s forty years ago.

Kenichi and Miki meet, and they theorize about whatever happened to Baby Godzilla– he could be dead. Godzilla is becoming overpowered with his “Reactor” messed up, and he will explode, vaporizing Earth’s entire atmosphere. If they attack and blow up Godzilla, that might even be worse. (Worse than the end of the world?)

At the Tokyo Bay undersea tunnel, the workers run into a snag. Their elevator shaft is melting! This was the same site where the first Godzilla was killed forty years ago. Ijuin explains his theories about what’s going on. They find signs of life in the soil sample he took from the tunnel.

Kenichi suggests to the military that they need to use a new oxygen-destroyer bomb to kill this Godzilla like they did the original. It’s non-explosive and might do the job. His aunt remembers those terrible days and warns him not to make a new bomb.

At the aquarium, the security guard watches as all the fish die and turn to bones in front of his eyes. Yukari, Kenichi, and Ijuni all get called to see the results. Whatever did this has mutated from the soil of the undersea tunnel. This has been evolving ever since the original oxygen-destroyer bomb went off.

A bunch of special-forces soldiers arrive at a factory to look for the new mutated creature that killed all the fish. It’s gotten a lot bigger, and it’s got an energy weapon as well. Turns out, there are more than one of them. A really big one shows up outside, and everyone sees it. It looks like the humans win this battle.

Meanwhile, Godzilla goes after some nuclear reactors. The general gets the call: the new Super-X 3 is ready to launch. It’s got cadmium bombs and freeze guns. They quickly fly to where Godzilla is and blast him with the freeze gun, which does, in fact, slow him down. When they use their missiles, it appears that Godzilla is finally frozen for the next six hours. Maybe everything is over and will be fine now.

Or maybe not. Miki and another psychic talk about her mental powers getting weaker; she might not even be able to contact “The Little One.”

Meanwhile, at the beach, Godzilla shows up. No, this is Baby Godzilla, much more grown up and looking like a smaller version of the regular Godzilla. The big one, whose temperature is now around 900 degrees, changes course; he may be chasing Junior. The big one is heading for a dramatic, Earth-destroying meltdown– within the week!

Back in Tokyo, the new creatures have been hiding inside the factory, out of sight, as the humans bring in giant freeze-guns to deal with them. The creatures soon show up in force, and the firefight begins. The creatures all seem to merge into one giant kaiju monster. Now it’s a problem! Ijuin says micro-oxygen didn’t cause this– it must be the oxygen-destroyer bomb itself. They call the new one “Destroyer” because of that. “Only that monster can stop the meltdown,” Kenichi suggests.

Now they need to figure out how to get the two monsters together to fight. They get Miki and the other psychic to “steer” Baby Godzilla to the proper place.

Destorayah takes the bait and zaps Baby Godzilla. They fight, and this results in tons of collateral damage in downtown Tokyo. Suddenly, the Big G shows up in town and heads for the fight. Destorayah sucks energy from Junior, who is not going to survive much longer.

Destorayah has mutated, and Godzilla’s temperature continues to rise. They bring the Super-X3 back into the battle; Ijuin wants to use the weapons to freeze Godzilla to prevent the inevitable explosion.

Just as the two Godillas meet, the new and improved Destorayah grabs the little one and flies off. He drops him from a great height and then shoots him repeatedly. Miki’s helicopter is shot down, and they all run to where the Baby is dying to cry– even Godzilla.

Now it’s time for the two adults to fight. Super-turbocharged Godzilla is not going to mess around with the monster who hurt his son, so he goes all in this time.

Miki and her friend encounter smaller versions of Destorayah, and they all gang up on Godzilla. They don’t last long, so he goes over to check out what’s left of Junior. He breathes energy in the little one and moves on.

Destorayah shows up again, and there’s more fighting. Godzilla’s getting so hot that his spines are melting, and he’s leaking radiation wildly. All the freeze weapons let loose, and his radiation starts to drop. Godzilla then melts into glitter and blows away.

Suddenly, all the radioactivity reduces to zero and everyone looks at the mist over Tokyo. Baby Godzilla has absorbed it all, and now he roars like his father did…

Brian’s Commentary

What’s worse than Godzilla? Giant, flaming-hot Godzilla!

This one ties in with the oxygen-bomb from the first film, which has never been mentioned since. There are also a lot of nods to “Aliens” (1986). The Destorayah creature design is ambitious, but silly looking and not very articulate.

At one point, they flat out state that the original Godzilla was killed at the end of the 1954 movie, so this is a different Godzilla.

This was intended to be Godzilla’s final fight until the fiftieth anniversary in 2004, the end of an era. Due to the failure of the American version, they brought him back a little earlier than planned for the next film.

Kevin’s Commentary

This one starts right off the bat with a Godzilla attack. The action is pretty steady throughout too. And the stakes are higher this time, a potential end of the world, not just the end of some cities in Japan. So it’s a worthy finish to this era of the Godzilla movies.

I like how they tied things back to the first Godzilla movie from decades previous.

There is a cool montage of footage from the old movies during the closing credits, showing just how much the creature and model effects improved over the years.

I was pleased and entertained.

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Three new films, one from last year, and one oldie sits in the queue for us today.

We’ll start off with the recent-ish “Ziam,” then look at “Bloat.” We’ve got some big stars in “The Ritual.” We’ll then finish up with the comedic “We Are Zombies” and the kaiju-fest, “Godzilla Vs. SpaceGodzilla.”

“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christmas” is available now wherever you get your books. Seventy-Five holiday-themed films are included— it’s our biggest book yet!

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #50, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 Ziam

* Directed by: Kulp Kaljareuk

* Written by: Vathanyu Ingkawiwat, Kulp Kaljareuk, Nut Nualpang

* Stars: Mark Prin Suparat, Nuttanicha Dungwattanawanich, Vayla Wanvayla Boonnithipaisit

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a fast zombie movie, well made and set in Thailand, slightly in the future. The main character is a trained and experienced fighter, so he participates in a lot of combat both before and during the outbreak. It was fairly entertaining, but didn’t feel like much we haven’t already seen before.

Spoilery Synopsis

We hear about the collapse of the environment and possibly the end of humanity. The Thai government has been on lockdown for the past ten years, so they still have their resources, or at least that’s what the propaganda on the radio says.

Singh is quitting his job and daydreams about his girlfriend, Rin. He might go back to kickboxing, which he’s good at. The two drive into the food-insect farm in the apocalyptic wasteland. As they park the truck, bandits approach, but Singh fights them off. The bandits don’t stand a chance.

There are riots and fighting all over Bangkok. Singh’s friend is elated to find that they’ve been carrying a load of dried fish in the truck. We cut to Mr. Vasu, who runs the company and kept the people from starving. We see that Vasu has invented a new kind of “safe” fish, and this is what Singh’s friend got. All the businessmen and investors get a sample, but then the convulsions start.

At home, Rin nags at Singh about his dangerous job. She realizes that right now, there aren’t many options. Rin’s a doctor who works at the nearby hospital. She gets called by the hospital administrator for an important case: Mr. Vasu’s wife. Vasu thinks fish liver can improve his wife’s condition, but Rin isn’t sure the fish is even healthy. Meanwhile, Vasu’s partner, Purich, dies bloodily on the operating table, a victim of the fish.

Purich then wakes back up, now a zombie. Rin gets a firsthand experience with him in the hallway.

Singh hears that there’s an emergency at the hospital. He arrives just in time to watch some people fall off the roof– and keep moving afterward. It’s a fast-spreading outbreak of a fast-zombie virus. Soon, the whole hospital is crawling with zombies, and Rin is pretty much on her own.

Singh gets inside and immediately has to start fighting zombies. Rin’s young friend, Buddy, also has to hide from the monsters until Singh shows up to help him.

The government decides to blow up the hospital; it’s better than losing the whole city then the country. Demolition level explosives with a nice long timer are placed.

Ren and Buddy search for Rin and Buddy’s mom, but there are a lot of zombies to avoid on the way. They find Buddy’s mother, but she’s been bitten and knows how that’s going to go, so she sends the boy with Singh. Singh fights off a bunch of zombies, using just his feet, while carrying Buddy on his back.

Rin comes to Mr. Vasu’s room, and he lets her in. He lets her in and says she’ll be safe here. The government sends men to rescue Vasu. They arrive by helicopter and set the bombs for thirty minutes.

Singh and Rin are eventually reunited, and he’s shot almost immediately after. Vasu’s men grab Rin and drag her off to care for Vasu’s wife. Singh gets right back up and attacks the soldiers. It’s quite a battle, but never doubt who’s going to win. By the time he wakes up, Rin has him all patched up.

Meanwhile, some of the zombies downstairs are getting really messed up. Singh runs into Vasu, who watches his wife turning into one of the creatures. She bites him as many more flood into the ward.

Rin and Buddy run as Singh tries to hold off the zombies. Rin and Buddy make it to the helicopter on the roof and work to convince the men there that she’s not infected. Singh makes it up to the roof and staggers toward the helicopter, but the copter takes off and leaves him there.

The explosives go off, the whole hospital collapses. Rin and Buddy fly off to safety. Later, back in her small village, Rin is safe.

Somehow, we see that Singh has survived the zombies and the collapse of the hospital and is still kicking zombie ass in the city…

Brian’s Commentary

It’s well made, and being from Thailand makes it interesting, but it’s nothing new. The acting looks fine, but we saw a dubbed version, and the voices were less than stellar.

Nothing new here to see.

Kevin’s Commentary

Like Brian said, it’s Thai, which makes it a novelty for us, and it’s put together well. But it’s just another fast zombie movie.

Singh’s combat abilities and endurance after damage weren’t too realistic, but then it’s not a realistic movie. I was going to say they might as well have just had Singh show up at the end. Then they did. Which is completely ridiculous after he was on the roof of a building that was demolished by explosives.

I was fairly entertained through most of it, but it wasn’t that memorable.

2025 Bloat

* Directed by: Pablo Absento

* Written by: Pablo Absento, Buddy Giovinazzo

* Stars: Ben McKenzie, Bojana Novakovic, Malcolm Fuller

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 26 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This is another “screenlife” subgenre of horror, a film that’s entirely made up of videos, web pages, emails, video chat, etc. And it was brought to us by Apple. A father has to deal remotely with a son in Japan, along with another son and his wife, who are struggling with the supernatural. Bloat is a perfect title - it’s not a bad little story but it’s bloated out into a full length movie that didn’t impress either of us very much.

Spoilery Synopsis

We watch a phone video of a woman giving birth; there’s something wrong with the baby. He reads a text “It’s time to move on. Jack, we’ve lost our child. It’s time to move on.” Jack and Hannah then decide to move to Tokyo. We watch a “Trip planning montage” which looks a lot like an ad for Apple. There’s suddenly an attack in the middle east, and Jack’s leave gets cancelled.

Hannah and her two sons end up going to Tokyo without Jack. We watch Jack and Hannah talking through Facetime. Suddenly, Hannah drops the phone and runs away, leaving Jack hanging. We then see headlines that four boys drowned that day at the park, and Jack’s son Kyle was one of them, but he miraculously survived.

Jack tries to get more information, but it’s hard since Hannah lost her phone and the other son, Steve, can’t use his phone in the hospital. Jack watches news footage over and over. What is that green stuff coming out of Kyle’s mouth?

Afterward, Kyle is different. He bites his brother, but Jack is too busy managing drone strikes to pay full attention.

Jack talks to a psychologist about Kyle’s weird behavior. We see a video of Kyle discussing his drowning experience with the doctor. He then goes on to research PTSD and a website for “PARENTS OF POSSESSED KIDS.”

Kyle wants a drone for Christmas, and he’s also interested in bugs now. Kyle starts texting Jack in Japanese, but he doesn’t speak Japanese. Steve complains that Kyle is different; he eats rotten cucumbers now.

Jack watches an old video of Hannah dumping the dead baby’s ashes in the lake and gets depressed. He then watches some clearly fake YouTube videos of supernatural stuff. We then get a long montage of conspiracy videos and blogs.

Hannah calls Jack and says that Steve has disappeared. Jack gets a video of what Steve did last night; he followed Kyle out to the woods. Turns out, Steve thinks he’s been hanging out with some kind of little monsters. Steve also thinks his mother is back on drugs.

Jack calls his friend Ryan, who’s still in Tokyo, to check on the family. Jack also orders a bunch of “trail cams” for Steve to set up out in the woods. Hannah seems to be in denial about all the weirdness.

Ryan goes to see a Buddhist monk, and he says there’s a “Kappa” in one of Steve’s videos. They usually kill children, not possess them. There was another case about 15 years ago, but the old monk doesn’t know much about that time. “The kappa will swallow the boy’s soul. Then it will be impossible to save him.” It can be killed with fire. Jack researches the previous case, but that boy ended up dying. He then calls the father of the dead boy, who is now in prison for murder.

There’s a typhoon coming in, so there’s no way for Jack to get to Japan. Ryan has night-vision goggles and wants to go watch the kappa in the forest. Jack calls Hannah, who seems to be out of her mind and likely possessed as well.

Ryan sees the kappa in the woods and shoots it, but then his gun jams. Jack watches as the kappa swallows Ryan.

Jack deserts his post and flies to Japan. He finds Hannah dead with her face half-eaten. Jack then burns down the house with Kyle inside. Jack runs back into the burning house but still holds his iphone camera up for us all to see. Apparently it was the sweet spot of killing the kappa with fire while saving Kyle.

In the morning, Jack is arrested for the murder of his wife and military desertion. There’s a court-martial, and he faces a 45-year sentence. Steve and Kyle both testify at the trial.

Brian’s Commentary

TIL what “Screenlife” is. I hate it. It made sense back in the days of COVID when two actors couldn’t be in the same room with each other, but why do it now?

The whole thing is told through Facetime, Skype, texts, Instagram, Google searches, and other computer communications apps. It’s got more screen recordings than one of those Apple Keynote events. Half the time, these people’s WiFi is on the fritz, so we often only get bits and pieces of the conversation.

The hardest thing to believe in this film is that he watched all those online videos without a single annoying ad.

I don’t care for the way it was filmed, but the acting is decent. The main problem is that it’s such a weak story– it felt like a 20 minute short film with far too much padding. And there’s not a real ending, which makes it all worse.

Kevin’s Commentary

I find the “screenlife” genre kind of tiresome and exhausting to watch. They play up glitchy video, bad connections, and so forth when it’s useful. Though it lends to Jack’s frustration and tension in this case. And they could show some things and angles they wouldn’t normally be able to. So I have mixed feelings on this one but it leans toward dislike. The dislike grew as the movie progressed without a lot of progression and remained a pretty weak story.

2025 The Ritual

* Directed by: David Midell

* Written by: David Midell, Enrico Natala

* Stars: Al Pacino, Dan Stevens, Ashley Greene

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 38 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a movie based on the 1928 exorcism of a young woman named Emma Schmidt. The cast is very good. As far as films go, it’s well made though kind of slow at times. Overall, it didn’t feel like anything we hadn’t seen before. It didn’t do much for either of us.

Spoilery Synopsis

We see a very frightened priest praying as credits roll.

Nine days earlier, in 1928 Iowa, the priest, Father Joseph Steiger, gives his sermon and mentions that his brother just recently died. The bishop shows up unexpectedly and hands him the psychiatric report on a very troubled woman. The woman’s parish wants to do an exorcism. Father Riesinger has been assigned to do that, but they want to do it here, at Steiger’s church.

Steiger sets up a private train car for Emma Schmidt, and he suggests to the train people that she’s a little crazy and a little dangerous, so they need to stay away from her. Father Theophilus arrives, and he’s a little strange. He explains what he needs to do the ritual. Riesinger and Steiger don’t agree that it’s a supernatural problem; the old man is sure that it is, but Steiger is more rational about it all, suspecting mental illness.

They get everything set up and start the first ritual. The religious people all say a blessing, and Emma goes into convulsions. That’s pretty much it for the first day.

On the second day, it’s much the same, but Emma tries to get all sexy with Steiger and attacks Sister Rose, yanking out a bunch of her hair. Riesinger says that’s why he wanted her restrained, so Steiger has to agree.

On the third ritual, they tie Emma down, and the convulsions get excessive. This time, furniture in the room starts to fall over and move.

One the fourth day, Emma asks about Stieger’s dead brother, and Riesinger burns her with a cross. By the next day, she’s all covered in sores and blisters. One of the nuns gets her hand crushed.

Steiger learns that Riesinger knew Emma when she was a little girl and thinks there’s something wrong with that. The two priests debate the whole project. The Mother Superior wants this whole thing to be done; she gives them one more week. She also wants Emma moved to the basement.

Stieger starts getting more and more distracted and obsessed with the whole thing, and so are the parishioners. The bishop shows up for an inspection, and he’s not pleased either, but insists that they continue. Steiger admits to Sister Rose that he doesn’t know what he’s doing.

There are more rituals, and they get more and more upsetting for Steiger. Weird things start happening all through the convent. Riesinger gives him a pep talk.

Riesinger says this is the final battle, they can’t stop or let up any more. Emma escapes into the catacombs (in Iowa?) and they all go looking for her. They find her, and it all gets very loud and dramatic. Finally, everyone works together, and the evil is sucked right out of Emma.

Brian’s Commentary

Yep, it’s another exorcism movie with two priests and an excess of angst.

Al Pacino plays “doddering old man” really well, but he’s not very interesting. I have no idea what was up with that accent. Dan Stevens is great as always. The acting overall is good, with the exception of Pacino who’s clearly playing a stereotype.

There are numerous “jump scares” that are simply loud noises covering something pretty mundane. The special effects, what there are of them, are really minimal. The shaky camerawork is overdone to the point where it gets annoying. Maybe the worst part is that we’ve seen it all before and this movie adds nothing new to the genre.

Kevin’s Commentary

They lost me right at the beginning when they said it’s based on true events from the most documented case of demonic possession in history. Information about the real case is kind of interesting https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Ecklund. Apparently it was successful in 1928 and Ecklund (a pseudonym given to her to protect her identity) only exhibited “milder” and “quite manageable” possessions after that.

Did they elevate my opinion as the movie went along? Well, it had a powerhouse duet of actors in the two lead roles and Abigail Cowen does a fine job as Emma, as does the other cast. And as a movie it’s decently put together, if a little slow at times. But it’s an hour and a half of “possession” symptoms and priests showing that God is all powerful as long as you say the right combination of magic words with rituals. They do have plenty of shaky cameras, loud music, and the occasional jump scare to spice things up.

I’d say I wasn’t impressed, and I was barely entertained.

2024 We Are Zombies

* Directed by: Francois Simard, Anouk Whissell, Yoann-Karl Whissell

* Written by: Jerry Frissen, Francois Simard, Anouk Whissell

* Stars: Alexandre Nachi, Derek Johns, Megan Peta Hill

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 20 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Set in a world where the dead come back to life, as non-cannibal zombies who are in various states of functionality and have rights. We join an eccentric trio as they make their way through a world of strangeness, trying to make money and keep their grandmother safe. With greed and big money playing a role, things get violent. It’s weird and funny, with a good cast and excellent effects. We really enjoyed it.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on a zombie walking through an alley downtown. It sneaks up on a guy getting takeout. The zombie is annoying and begs for change. Credits roll.

Freddy complains about the beggar-zombie to Karl and then goes back to rip off the dead man’s jaw for a gold tooth. Maggie calls, and she’s got another pickup for them. We watch a news report: zombies are here, but they aren’t eating brains, so we have to just live with them. Zombies are taking all the jobs. The undead want equal rights.

Freddy and Karl go to a man’s apartment. They’ve been called to remove the family’s grandfather, who has become living-impaired. It goes badly, and they pull the man’s head off, which only slows him down a little. Turns out, Freddy and Karl don’t really work for the Coleman company; they’re crooks. They take the old man to Don, who doesn’t want to pay full price for this one, since he’s damaged.

We then cut to a commercial from Bob Coleman. They’re busy studying the zombies and the secrets of the mind. They keep the zombies in cages and run experiments on them.

Karl, Freddy, and Maggie go out for lunch, and Freddy gets an ear in his fries. Stanley and Rocco, the guys from the actual Coleman company get chewed out for having their clients stolen.

Karl and Freddy go out on another call, and this time, they’re Tased and tied to chairs. It’s now-undead-Rocco and Stanley, and they’re both really stupid. After Rocco shoots himself, Stanley sends them home and kidnaps Karl’s grandma instead.

Karl goes to see Don, who likes him in an uncomfortable way. Don’s got a high-profile pickup for them. But first, they watch an “art show” that involves the zombies. Otto is the artist, and he’s also the client. He wants them to kidnap Zelvirella, a dead porn star. The only problem is that she’s being held by Coleman.

Meanwhile, at Coleman, they have a new project in the works that makes zombies’ heads explode. That goes badly for Hannity, the security chief.

Freddy and Stanley break into the Coleman cemetery and start digging. They dig up Zelvirella, who is not much more than a skeleton now. Just then, the security guys start shooting at them.

Coleman dies in an accident and then becomes living-and-brain-impaired. Hannity is now taking over the company.

Stanley and Rocco are even dumber than Karl and Freddy, and old Granny gets shot.

Maggie admits that Stanley is her ex, and they all know each other. Karl knows a webcam girl that looks like Zelvirella, and maybe they can kidnap her to take to Don and Otto? She’s a ZILF. Karl goes to see the girl and convinces her to go off with them.

Hannity tests the special gas again, and this makes peaceful old zombie Coleman into a regular, aggressive flesh-eating zombie.

There’s a big celebration at Otto’s place, and the press is there in force to report. Mother Teresa and all the famous living-impaired show up. Hannity releases his special gas into the air vents, which starts to affect the zombies– and they all get hungry for living flesh.

Otto sees Zelvirella and he approves. Karl gets jealous and spills the beans about her not being the real thing. Just then, Mother Teresa breaks in and eats Otto. Don tries to make an exit and gets torn apart.

Karl, Freddy, and Maggie are on the news as terrorists who attacked the club. They all apologize to each other for all their arguing. They all decide to fight their way out of the zombie-filled club, and many things go wrong. Turns out, they are good at fighting the undead.

Hannity comes in and plans to expose the four heroes as terrorists. Out of the blue, Stanley takes off his mask and turns against his boss. Undead Hannity then shoots Freddy. Undead Freddy then sits up– no, he’s still alive; Hannity only shot the ring box in his pocket. Stanley has run off with the money, but he gets bitten on the way out.

Two weeks later, Granny and Rocco are living together. The zombie infection spread like crazy, and it’s now the real zombie apocalypse...

Brian’s Commentary

It’s a very unusual take on the usual zombie tropes, all played for laughs. The gore effects and zombies are well done, but not excessive; well, OK, one of them is a bit excessive.

It’s pretty good!

Kevin’s Commentary

I liked the unique path that this one takes. It isn’t a typical zombie apocalypse - some of them are brain damaged and some of them are highly functional - at least until the evil corporation gets involved. I liked this one a lot.

1994 Godzilla vs SpaceGodzilla

* Directed by: Kensho Yamashita, Takao Okawara, Kazuki Omori

* Written by: Kanji Kashiwa, Hiroshi Kashiwabara, Shinichiro Kobayashi

* Stars: Jun Hashizume, Megumi Odaka, Zenkichi Yoneyama

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 46 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This was the 40th anniversary Godzilla film. Mothra is back as well as the big G, plus the humans have a new giant robot Moguera. But most of all, there’s Space Godzilla who formed from some of Godzilla’s cells and wants to destroy Earth for some reason. There’s battles galore and lots of stuff that the people do in this one as well in this outing that leans into science fiction. It was entertaining.

Spoilery Synopsis

We see a spiky glowing thing flying through space, eventually crashing on an island on Earth. We then hear Godzilla roar.

We cut to a huge underground where Moguera is being built; it’s another giant kaiju-fighting machine. Star Falcon is there as well; it all looks very modular.

We cut to the telepathic institute, where they plan to mentally control Godzilla. Miki and the telepathic children from previous films are learning to do all this. She remembers back when Mothra flew off into space and released many little baby “moths.”

Two men land on an island and start climbing the mountain. They’re Shinjo and Sato. When they get to the top, they run into Yuki, another guy they weren’t expecting. They all run into Baby Godzilla from the previous film and set up camp.

The scientists and military talk to NASA, who explains that a kaiju has attacked and destroyed the space station.

Miki’s magic earrings glow, and one of the mini-Mothras appears. It brings the two fairies, who warn that Earth is facing a terrible crisis. There’s a space monster coming to kill Godzilla and conquer the Earth. She decides to help the institute with their telepathic weapon thing.

The three men on the island are digging holes. They’re planting tear gas mines for Godzilla. Yuki has a special coagulant-filled bullet that he thinks could kill Godzilla. The two newcomers are here for Project T, the telepathy project, and they don’t want to kill Big G.

Miki, Dr. Okubo, and Gondo arrive at the island to prepare for Godzilla’s return. He comes back every so often to tend to the baby. Meanwhile, the military launches Moguera to prepare to fight the space invader. When the Baby steps on a tear gas landmine, Miki senses that the big Godzilla is on the move.

He soon arrives. Koji shoots him with a bazooka that implants a device that will amplify Miki’s telepathy and allow her to control him. Yuki still has his poison bullet, but he just can’t get the right shot.

Moguera and the thing in space have a battle among the asteroids. We soon see that the alien creature looks an awful lot like Godzilla. Moguera flies off, out of control, as the monster proceeds toward Earth.

Something goes wrong with the machinery and feedback nearly kills Miki. When she wakes up, she knows about the space monster.

Just as Yuki is about to kill Godzilla, the big space monster lands on the island. He’s SPACEGODZILLA, and the baby doesn’t like him. SpaceGodzilla looks like the regular version, but with more embedded crystals and shoulder pads.

SpaceGodzilla attacks the baby, and it’s no contest. Godzilla shows up right away, and uses his atomic blast on the alien, who has the ability to fly and shoot as well. SpaceGodzilla knocks down Godzilla and then kidnaps the baby. Afterwards, even Yuki thinks it’s had enough of a bad day.

Godzilla leaves the island, and the humans all pack up. Miki decides to stay behind. Experts analyze the DNA and decide that the space monster is essentially Godzilla, but with bits of Mothra and Biollante’s genetics mixed in with some crystal organisms.

Yuki is assigned to be the new pilot for Moguera.

Baby Mothra tells Miki that she can solve all this if she works hard enough. Shinjo wants to talk about romance, but Miki only has eyes for Godzilla. That night, ninjas kidnap Miki.

Yuki leads Shinko and Sato into a building controlled by the Japanese Mafia to rescue Miki. Dr. Okubo has turned traitor and wants to lure Godzilla to where they are. There’s a gunfight, and they rescue Miki just as SpaceGodzilla attacks Tokyo and destroys the bad guys’ building.

Yuki, Shinjo, and Sato board Moguera. SpaceGodzilla makes big crystal spikes grow out of the ground, destroying the buildings and creating his own Fortress of Solitude. Moguera, under Yuki’s control, goes after Godzilla instead of the space invader, annoying everyone. Shinjo knocks him out and takes over.

Moguera arrives near SpaceGodzilla and starts shooting. It goes pretty well until the guys inside it decide to use the big drill weapon, which requires close contact and goes poorly for Moguera. But they take off, and Godzilla finally makes it there.

The two living monsters start their battle, and before long, SpaceGodzilla lifts up Godzilla using his tractor beams and throws him across town. SpaceGodzilla then shoots ice crystals at Godzilla.

Moguera splits in two; a land-based portion and a flying piece. They need to destroy the power tower that SpaceGodzilla is draining. Miki and Gondo steal a boat to go over to where the battle is taking place.

Yuki and Godzilla destroy the tower, reducing SpaceGodzilla’s powers. The two halves of Moguera then rejoin, and everyone is pleased with Yuki again. Moguera and Godazilla continue to pound on the space monster and blow up his shoulder pads.

Moguera gets knocked out of the sky and Shinjo and Sato abandon ship; Yuki demands to stay behind and use his special bullet on Godzilla as per his original vendetta. That doesn’t work, so Yuki flies the machine into SpaceGodzilla, kamikaze-style. Shinjo rushes to the crash site to rescue Yuki, who explains that SpaceGodzilla is dying and will explode real soon now.

SpaceGodzilla does explode, taking what looks to be half the city with it. Godzilla roars in victory and heads off back to the ocean. Yuki gives up his special bullet. Fairy Mothra tells Miki that she’s saved planet Earth.

Brian’s Commentary

The music is pure 80s superhero stuff; overblown, loud, and very energetic. It’s got a giant robot, two monsters, ninjas, mafiosos, telepathy, a mad scientist, and a vengeance-crazed soldier. What more could a movie want?

Kevin’s Commentary

That presentation the expert gives explaining the scientific origin of Space Godzilla is a short, but pretty impressive, stream of technobabble. It’s really best not to think about the science and science fiction here. But I thought this one was above average for entertainment. It’s lively and fast moving with lots going on.

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This time around, we have four new films and one oldie. We’ll start off with the much-hyped “Frankenstein” which just came out on Netflix. Next, we’ll watch an international film, “The Elixir” and also “The Mannequin,” which are also new releases. Finishing up the new stuff this week, we’ll take a look at “Black Phone 2.” Last, we’ll continue our Godzilla coverage with “Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla II” from 1993.

“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christmas” is available now wherever you get your books. Seventy-Five holiday-themed films are included— it’s our biggest book yet!

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Mainstream Films:

2025 Frankenstein

* Directed by: Guillermo del Toro

* Written by: Guillermo del Toro, Mary Shelley

* Stars: Oscar Isaac, Jacob Elordi, Christoph Waltz

* Run Time: 2 Hours, 29 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Basically, Dr. Frankenstein assembles a man out of corpse parts and brings him to life. But it’s not a smooth process and things get complicated. This version follows the original book somewhat closer than the classic Hammer and Universal film versions, and it goes much more into the moral and emotional complications. Beautifully filmed and directed, it’s long but entertaining. We both thought it’s really good.

Spoilery Synopsis

Prelude

In the farthestmost North, in 1857, we open on a ship frozen in the ice. The men work on the ice with axes. They are on a mission to find the North Pole. The men report an explosion and fire about two miles away, and they go to investigate. They find a wounded man who’s lost a lot of blood. They bring the unconscious man back to the ship, but there’s something else out there on the ice. They shoot it repeatedly, but that has little effect. It clearly wants the injured man, and it threatens to capsize the huge ship all on its own to get to him. The men shoot the ice beneath the monster and it sinks to the bottom of the ocean.

The sick man, Victor, says the monster will come back for them, “It can not die. I made him.” As he recovers, he offers to tell the captain his story.

Chapter 1: Victor’s Story

Victor’s father was a wealthy baron and a surgeon who was away much of the time, leaving Victor home with his mother. The father was abusive, but also taught Victor all about medicine. Something goes wrong with his mother’s pregnancy, and she dies. The baby, William, survives and soon becomes the father’s favorite. His father explains that “No one can conquer death.” Victor then decided to become the greatest doctor of all time.

At the medical school, Victor demonstrates a machine he’s made that animates bits and pieces of a corpse. It’s quite a demonstration. The other doctors call it an unholy abomination.

Mr. Harlander comes to visit; he saw the demonstration. Victor’s brother, William, is coming for a visit as he’s planning to be married. Harlander is something of a doctor himself, and he’s got new information about the nervous system that can help Victor– and financing as well. Harlander is making obscene amounts of money from weapons dealing because there’s a war on.

Victor meets William and his fiancee Elizabeth, who looks exactly like Victor’s dead mother. Victor and Elizabeth start arguing right away. Harlander rents a scary old castle for Victor to do his work in, and it’s… excessive. They start assembling equipment and looking for bodies– even before they’re hanged.

Meanwhile, Victor starts stalking Elizabeth. He pretends to be a priest to take her confession– nope, they’re just playing a game; they’re actually getting closer as William is busy managing the assembly of the lab. It’s a lot of work, and Victor is taking him for granted as he steals his gal away at the same time.

Harlander catches on to the affair and tells Victor to hurry up before the funding dries up. The war is having one final battle, and Victor gets his choice of all the good body parts. He gets down to the business of assembling the perfect body with Harlander photographing and documenting everything. Harlander reveals that he’s dying of syphilis and wants to be “included” in the experiment - put his brain in the new healthy body. Victor says there’s nothing left of Harlander that’s not infected, so he won’t do it.

It’s finally finished, and just then, a thunderstorm approaches. Victor gets the body into the machine and gets everything set up. Harlander, angry about being rejected, threatens to ruin everything, and Victor kills him accidentally. The lightning rod collector piece is damaged in the struggle, but Victor has no time to fix it.

Lightning strikes, and all sorts of things happen– except the body doesn’t live. It failed. Victor goes to bed.

When he wakes up, the creature is standing next to the bed, very much alive. He’s tall, gray, and scarred all over. He shows it around the castle, and it all goes pretty well for a while. Then he chains it up like a prisoner; he never considered what to do after the creature came to life.

Weeks pass, and the creature learns some things, but he still doesn’t speak other than to say “Victor.” He cuts himself and heals almost instantly. Victor’s a rotten parent and teacher. William and Elizabeth arrive for a surprise visit, and she meets the creature accidentally. She thinks Victor has been abusing and neglecting it, and she’s nice to it.

One night, Victor is beating on the creature and sees just how strong it really is. He blames Harlander’s death on the creature, telling William that it’s violent and dangerous. Victor sends William and Elizabeth home and then burns the lab, the castle, and the dungeon. With the creature still chained up inside. The whole castle explodes and collapses, and Victor loses a leg in the blast.

Back on the ship, the monster arrives and breaks in. The captain wants to hear his side of the story.

Part II The Creature’s Tale

We continue with the fire. He broke out of the chains and got out of the castle through the drain. It’s a rough fall, but he survives and walks away. He finds the pile of corpses and body parts that Victor threw out and takes some clothing from one of them. He’s almost immediately chased by hunters and shot.

He goes off and hides in the barn of a farmhouse. The family in the farmhouse talk to the hunters. The creature sees and hears them through the cracks in the wall; he especially likes the old blind man, the grandfather. The creature watched and learned as the old man taught the little girl to speak and read. Each night, he did chores and made things for the family, but they never saw him.

There’s a wolf attack on the family’s sheep, and most of them plan to hunt them in the mountains all winter. They leave the old blind man home alone, and the creature eventually reveals himself to the old man. The old man is nice to him, which is a new experience for the creature. They have conversations, the creature reads books and gains a lot of knowledge.

The creature makes a return visit to Victor’s castle and learns what he really is. He also learns where Victor lives. When he returns to the old man’s house, the wolves have killed him. Just then, the family returns and stabs and shoots the creature repeatedly. It takes a while, but he gets back up, his wounds healed.

Meanwhile, Victor is back at the family home; William’s wedding is fast approaching. The creature has tracked him down and watches the house from the nearby woods. They finally meet, and Victor wants the creature to thank him. The creature, on the other hand, wants Victor to make him a companion. “I cannot die, and I cannot live alone.”

Victor, unsurprisingly, refuses to listen. Victor then shoots Elizabeth by mistake and the creature kills William. He carries Elizabeth out of the mansion and into a nearby cave. As she slowly dies, Elizabeth tells the creature that she’s happier dead and that she loves the monster.

The monster decides that Victor will regret his decision and the hunt begins. Victor chases the monster through the mountains up to the arctic. The monster finally catches him. The monster simply wants to die at this point, and he holds onto a piece of Victor’s dynamite to see what will happen. He goes boom, but that still doesn’t kill him. He starts healing immediately. This is where the men from the ship came into the story.

On the ship, Victor apologizes to the creature. They talk about life and death and unending life. The monster then forgives Victor as his creator dies.

The captain then allows the creature to leave without a fight. The creature walks out onto the ice and pushes the ship free from where it’s been trapped. The captain announces he will give up his impossible mission and just go home. The creature, on the other hand, walks off into the sunrise…

Brian’s Commentary

The visuals are amazing here, both colorful and drab at the same time. They change around the family dynamic with Victor and the crew, but it sticks pretty closely with the book for the major plot points.

Most of the effects are practical, and when the CGI does appear, such as with the wolf attack, it’s noticeably bad. Otherwise, it looks great, the acting is excellent all around, and even though it’s two and a half hours, it never gets boring and never slows down.

The ending is different from the book. It’s not exactly a happy ending, but it’s not like the book, either. I’m not sure why del Toro felt the need to change the ending, but he did.

Overall, it’s a very good movie, but it’s still not a perfect adaptation of the original book– but it’s close.

Kevin’s Commentary

The director pushed for practical sets, and they look great. Unfortunately, at least when viewed on a television screen, it makes the CGI use more noticeable. And we also noticed how multiple places - such as the lab, Captain’s cabin, and blind man’s house are all bigger on the inside.

It’s a long film, but it moves well, and I was never bored.

All in all, I thought it was a grand and satisfying version of the story. I liked it a lot.

2025 The Elixir

* AKA “Abadi Nan Jaya”

* Directed by: Kimmo Stambel

* Written by: Agasyah Karim, Khalid Kashogi, Kimo Stamboel

* Stars: Mikha Tambayong, Eva Celia Latjuba, Donny Damara

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 56 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a frenetic attack of fast zombies that only has a short interval of getting to know some characters before it starts going full tilt. The effects and action sequences are all excellent. There isn’t a lot that’s very new here, but it’s well made and entertaining.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on a big party for a circumcision ceremony. Ningsih and her boyfriend argue over him proposing or not. He’s about to do it when the phone rings. He has to go back to work and promises to return later. Suddenly, a car comes out of nowhere and crashes the party– literally. At first, they think the driver is drunk, but no, he’s a zombie. Credits roll.

Five hours earlier, the herbalist company makes some kind of new “medicine” and sends it to the boss by motorcycle courier. The courier drives through the place where they’re setting up the party for later. He arrives at the boss’s house with his sample.

Rud, Nes, and Han talk about a business arrangement with her father, Sadimin. Meanwhile, Karina talks to Sadmin, the boss, about his “sample” from the lab. She wants to go on another honeymoon with him. Nes won’t speak with Karina, and hasn’t for the past three years. Little Han complains to his uncle that his parents are always fighting; Rud runs the company for her father, who is retiring. The uncle, Bambang, seems to have a lot of guns in his bedroom.

Sadimin looks in the mirror after his sample, and he looks quite a bit younger– it works! As he has sex with his young wife, we see something nasty growing on his back. He then decides he doesn’t want to sell his company, which annoys Rud and Ical, who were hoping for a big payout. This new product, this elixir, changes everything!

As the family argues, Sadimin begins to throb and pulse. Soon, he’s screaming and puking all over. Everyone panics that the old man is dead, but then he sits up, fully zombified, and eats one of the servants. No, two of the servants. By the time he attacks Bambang, the rest of the family tries to intervene. The old man ends up getting shot through the head with an arrow.

The surviving servant, Aris, gets in the car to go report what happened. He’s covered in blood that Sadiman vomited all over him and looks like he got bit.

Back at the house, the dead servant, Pardi, also gets up, and he’s not looking good at all. As Nes and Bambang sit in the car, things spiral out of control behind them. When they go back inside, there’s blood and nastiness everywhere.

Meanwhile, Aris is fully infected in the car, leading to what we saw in the opening scene. Soon, the partygoers are all infected.

All the characters we know call each other and agree to meet at the chief’s house. Turns out, that’s where the party was, and by now, it’s all gotten way out of hand. Nes and Bang drive up and see what’s happening, but Rud, Karina, and Han are trapped inside the house. Bang drives the car away, leading the group of zombies away from the house– right into town.

Meanwhile, Rudi’s been bitten, and Karina and Han try to patch him up while hiding in an old farmhouse. Rudi knows he’s doomed and says goodbye to his son.

Bang and Nes arrive at the police station and try to explain what happened. Karina and Han meet Ningsih, who seems to be the only survivor from the party. The four mostly unarmed cops then go outside to investigate and end up joining the herd.

Ningsih’s boyfriend, Rahman, is the last remaining cop, and he ends up barricaded inside the police station with Nes and Bang. He calls for reinforcements, but they get wiped out as well. Nes and Karina call each other on the phone and make up for their prior arguments.

Rahman remembers that they have tons of fireworks that the police station has confiscated; maybe they can use those as a distraction. They’ve also got plenty of large guns and riot gear inside with them. They make a run for it, but it’s not as easy as it sounds. The only thing that saves them is a thunderstorm; the rain seems to put all the zombies into a trance.

Meanwhile, Ningsih, Han, and Karina get out of the barn on a motorcycle, with zombie-Rudi in pursuit. Soon, most of the characters are together, trapped inside a truck. They end up driving right through the police station. Ningsih and Rahman get bitten, and Bang gets pinned by the truck. Rudi shows up and it’s a hand-to-hand battle between him and whoever’s left. Rahman finally proposes to Ningsih as they both die, and then Bang goes out with a… Bang!

Kenes, Karina, and Han get out during the explosion. Nes finds that she’s been bit and says she can’t come with the other two. She then walks off into a field and shoots herself.

Karina and Han ride the motorbike off into the countryside as the sun rises. We also see that the zombies are still following them.

We cut to the city, where Sadmin’s business partner receives the second sample of the new medicine. His wife suddenly looks so much younger…

Brian’s Commentary

Untested, unapproved herbal medicine. What could go wrong?

This one is Indonesian, and we don’t see much from there. That’s good because they were really able to take their time on the creature effects. It starts off like a soap opera with a family business and quickly goes in a whole new direction with the elixir.

It’s a little long, but it never drags. Overall, it’s pretty good!

Kevin’s Commentary

Once a fast zombie outbreak starts, it would be mighty hard to stop. As the folks in this movie find out. And just what the heck was in that herbal concoction they were selling?

I appreciated that this one gets to the action quickly and pretty much keeps going steadily with it. It’s very well made and entertaining in that fast zombie kind of way.

I’ve noticed that a necessary ingredient for characters’ reactions in this kind of movie is that they live in a universe where zombie movies don’t exist, so they have never seen one. It would be interesting to see a movie like this one where they have all seen movies like this one such as “Train to Basan” and “World War Z.”

I’d say that I liked it.

2025 The Mannequin

* Directed by: John Berardo

* Written by: John Berardo

* Stars: Isabella Gomez, Jack Sochet, Lindsay LaVanchy

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 25 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A year after her sister’s death, a woman returns to an old building to set up the artist space that her sister wanted. But it’s complicated by ghosts and stuff. Neither of us thought this was very entertaining. There’s a lot of talk and it’s kind of dull, even in the scary parts.

Spoilery Synopsis

Ruth, an old-timey model, stands for a photo shoot as Jack, the photographer, talks to her about big stars that he’s worked with. He then stops to take her measurements. He talks her into changing into another outfit. When she’s done, he kills her with an ax. He then poses her with her decapitated head on the body of a mannequin. Credits roll.

In the present day, two sisters, Sophia and Liana, look at the same building, now empty and ready to move in. Liana goes home and finds her boyfriend Peter, a ghost finder streamer, is finishing his show. They all end up going to Nadine’s big party tonight. Liana breaks up with her boyfriend after the party.

The next day, Sophia brings her friends Nadine and Hazel over to see the new workspace, and they all admire the creepy looking mannequin that came with the furniture. The two sisters then argue about their lives.

That night, working alone, Sophia gets a shock. So does Liana– her boss fires her. In the morning, Liana goes to the old building to look for Sophia and finds her in a puddle of blood. The police declare it a suicide.

One year later, the property manager calls Liana; he’s been storing all Sophia’s stuff. She’s taking over the lease. That night, Liana hallucinates seeing Sophia in the workspace. Nadine and Hazel stop in for a visit, and they aren’t happy that Liana just abandoned them last year. Eventually, they all make up.

Hazel spends the night in the workspace with Liana and has a nightmare. When she wakes up, things get worse for her. Liana wakes up and finds Hazel cutting herself.

Some time later, Nadine and Liana confront Hazel about her attempted suicide, which Hazel insists didn’t happen. This all ends up in an argument, and they all go to Nadine’s place. That night, Nadine cuts herself and then chases after Hazel with a knife. She then puts her hand in the garbage disposal. She loses fingers.

All three girls now realize something is going on. Who they gonna call? The ghost-buster, aka, Peter. He already knows stories about that old factory. It was built as a mannequin factory, but then Jack Bernard started using it as a photographic studio. Over the next few decades, other models died there. Each of the women were missing various body parts. He was eventually caught and killed himself, also in this building.

They all go back to the building, and Peter uses his ghost hunting devices to locate an ax. He then gets some loud jump scares and then puts blood on the mannequin, who hasn’t done a darned thing to him. He does a whole exorcism ritual over the mannequin. After, he says they need to chop it up and burn it; he uses the ax he found downstairs. Sure enough, the missing body parts are inside the mannequin.

Liana then attacks Peter with the ax, and he loses a hand. Hazel and Nadine pull her out, screaming. We then see that the building manager is Jack’s own grandson, and he knew about everything all along.

Liana, Nadine, Hazel, and Peter go to Sophia’s grave. At the building, the manager brings in a new tenant for a photo studio. We see the mannequin, all glued back together, in the corner…

Brian’s Commentary

Jump scares that involve nothing beyond sudden loud noises are cheap cheats. Loud music is not scary.

So they found a mannequin full of old body parts and no one bothered to call the police? Right.

It’s really dull. Most of it made no real sense, but the primary sin is not to be boring, and this one didn’t quite pass that mark.

Kevin’s Commentary

It’s a good thing they used loud music to let us know when to be startled and scared.

The whole situation was unsettling and disturbing, but I thought it was a story on the thin side that was too stretched out with a lot of time spent on people yakking about stuff. Luckily the main character had an ex who was a ghost-hunter podcaster who could research the building history and show up with his ghost detecting electronics.

It’s a bit less than an hour and a half long, but it seemed much longer.

1993 Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla II

* Directed by: Takao Okawara, Kazuki Omori

* Written by: Yutaka Izubuchi, Wataru Mimura, Shinji Nishikawa

* Stars: Masahiro Takashima, Ryoko Sano, Megumi Odaka

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 45 Minutes

* Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lggl4LVqBag

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

While humanity is putting together a mechanical answer to Godzilla, Rodan hatches - as well as a baby relative of the giant lizard. It’s loaded with science fiction science, monster battles, human drama, and collateral damage. The effects keep getting a bit better with each movie too. We both thought it was entertaining fun.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on scientists looking at the severed robotic head of King Ghidorah. It’s 1992, and Japan has recruited a bunch of scientists to build a fighting machine, Garuda, but it was ineffective. They used the head of Mecha-Ghidorah from the future and learned how it worked to build an all-new, much improved fighting machine. They call it Mechagodzilla. Credits roll.

Kazuma, one of the scientists, explains things to Yumi about Garuda. He gets reassigned to “G-Force.” There’s lots of training, including martial arts, before he gets to study Godzilla.

Meanwhile, some men find dinosaur bones on an island. It’s a Tyrannodon. There’s also an intact egg. And an empty egg shell. Azusa is one of the scientists, and she sees a giant flying reptile on the cliffs above the camp. It makes the egg glow. It must have come from the second egg, gotten irradiated, and mutated just like Godzilla.

Suddenly, Godzilla shows up and shoots his laser breath at the flying monster. They fight for a while as the scientists scramble around trying to not be killed. The fight is still ongoing as the humans fly off in their helicopter, along with the egg.

Professor Omae studies the egg; will it hatch? Kazuma comes to visit; he’s a fan of Tyrannodons, and Azusa finds him irritating. The egg’s color changes depending on its emotion. Also, it’s listening to the scientists’ voices, and it’s very attached to Azusa.

Miki, from the previous few films, arrives with Kazuma. She wants the professor to get her psychic children to identify an object Kazuma took from the egg. It’s encoded with music, and when they play it, the egg gets upset– and hatches.

Turns out the egg isn’t one of those flying dinosaurs, it’s a small version of Godzilla! Miki names it a Godzillasaur, and it seems pretty nonviolent. Miki jumps; she senses Godzilla, the big one, is approaching and attacking the city.

The Mechagodzilla team runs to the machine, but Kazuma is AWOL. They prep and launch the giant robot, which can fly. They head toward Tokyo, where Godzilla is. They battle on and on as Godzilla searches for the little one, which is moved to a safe room. Godzilla eventually just wanders off empty-handed.

Kazuma is reassigned to manage the parking lot. The baby goes to live in a special zoo while the humans repair Mechagodzilla. Kazuma suggests a way to improve his Garuda machine to work with Mechagodzilla.

Kazuma shows Azusa his new mechanical flying Teranodon, and they ride it around the zoo. Miki brings the whole class of psychic children to see the baby, and they sing a song for him. The song excites the baby, and far away, Rodan also wakes up.

The military wants to use the baby as bait to lure Godzilla to an uninhabited island. They want Miki to go along inside Mechagodzilla to oversee the project. Azusa needs to go along to keep the baby calm.

Before they can do much, Rodan attacks the city. When the baby gets upset, Rodan comes to protect him; they’re half-brothers, as the general points out. Rodan grabs the container holding Azusa and the baby.

Mechagodzilla is launched again, as is Garuda, a big spaceship-looking flying fighter. Actually, Kazuma has stolen Garuda since he helped design it. Rodan quickly knocks Garuda out of the sky, leaving Mechagodzilla to try alone. The big machine eventually knocks out Rodan. It’s all fine now.

No, because Godzilla chooses this moment to show up. Mechagodzilla has taken a lot of damage, and not all the weapons work anymore. The real Godzilla beats the machine easily.

Garuda comes back online, and Kazuma gets back in the battle. Garuda lands on Mechagodilla’s back, making it “Super-MechaGodzilla.”

The scientists have determined that Godzilla has a second brain deep inside his torso, and they order Miki to blow it up, which she doesn’t want to do. When it goes Godzilla cannot walk.

As Godzilla lays dying, the baby gets angry and breaks out of his container. He roars and wakes up Rodan again. Rodan lands on Godzilla and transfers power into Godzilla, reconstituting Godzilla’s brain. Rodan then dissolves.

Super-overcharged Godzilla gets up, and he’s not happy. Really not happy. Mechagodzilla’s armor plating starts to melt and soon explodes.

Azusa gives Baby Godzilla a tearful goodbye, and all the humans fly off in a helicopter. Azusa tells Miki to telepathically contact Godzilla and convince him to take the baby away. They both march off into the ocean until next time…

Brian’s Commentary

The creature effects in this one have jumped up several levels. There’s a bit of CGI, but nothing looks cartoony. This one has more monster action than any of the previous films, but it’s all entertaining, not just men in suits jumping around.

This was a good balance of the fighting monsters and the high-tech weapons. This is one of the better ones.

Kevin’s Commentary

There’s just no defeating Godzilla, at least not permanently. The collateral damage in this one seemed especially heavy - and the model work keeps getting better.

It was noticeable with this one that it wasn’t a purely Japanese cast, they added in a few international helpers.

It was a very good entry in the series, well put together. I liked this one a lot.

2025 Black Phone 2

* Directed by: Scott Derrickson

* Written by: Joe Hill, Scott Derrickson, C. Robert Cargill

* Stars: Ethan Hawke, Mason Thames, Madeline McGraw

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 54 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Four years later, Finn and Gwen are back and struggling with the trauma of the previous movie. The Grabber is back too, sort of. They, along with a few new friends, all go to a camp where they get snowed in and scary stuff happens. This seemed like a bit of a reach to make a second movie, but here it is. It’s not too bad, but the story is on the weak side, and we weren’t very pleased with it overall.

Spoilery Synopsis

It’s 1957 in the Rocky Mountains. Hope stands in a very remote payphone in the mountains. She talks to the person on the other end about a dream; she got the phone number from her dream. The call gets creepy and she walks away. Credits roll as we see action shots of many icy cold places.

It’s now 1982, about four years after the first movie, and we watch Finn beat up a kid on the playground. The other kid picked on Finn for the stories about him killing a serial killer. Gwen thinks all the fighting is bad. Ernesto likes Gwen, and he wants her to go see Duran Duran with him.

That night, Finn has a flashback to his time with The Grabber; he’s still not completely over it.

We cut to what appears to be a children’s camp in the past and then someone brutally killed children in the snow. Gwen has nightmares and sleepwalks; she’s not over it either.

In the morning, Ernesto brings Gwen some king of Tarot-like cards. She’s got a “spooky” reputation at school, and he thinks that’s pretty cool.

Gwen has another dream, and this time, she answers the Black Phone, and it’s Hope from 1957 that we saw earlier. The dream told her to call here. Gwen knows who that was; it was her mother calling from a youth camp.

Later, Gwen does more research. She finds Camp Alpine Lake; it’s a real place, and she wants to go. Their father knows about it, since their mother worked there.

Finn, Gwen, and Ernesto get jobs at the camp and drive there. The camp is pretty remote, and it snows all the way there. They are met there by Mando and Mustang; the camp’s been cancelled until the storm passes, and they’re the only ones who have shown up.

Finn hears the payphone ringing. “I’m sorry but I can’t help you.” Still, it’s very insistent. It’s the Grabber, Meanwhile, Gwen has dreams of dead people breaking into her cabin. Gwen then talks about her dreams and Finn’s phone calls with Ernesto.

In the morning, they talk to Mando about their mother, and he remembers her. Finn gets a call from a little boy who doesn’t remember anything. “We weren’t supposed to be here.”

Gwen finds out that Barbara and Kenneth, the people who run the camp, don’t like her. Gwen dreams about her mother getting a similar phone call to the one Finn got. Finney, on the other hand, talks to The Grabber on the phone and talks about what he wants. The Grabber wants revenge for what Finn did to him.

Meanwhile, Gwen gets picked up in her dream by The Grabber and thrown around the room. Mando, Mustang, Ernesto, and the others all see this happen.

The whole camp group gets together; this isn’t their first experience with weirdness. Gwen tells how the three boys died, and Mando recognizes all of it. The Grabber used to be a worker there when Gwen’s mother was there. Mando has been looking for the dead children’s bodies for decades. The Grabber got his start here at camp; he had his first kills here.

Mando is alone later when he gets a call over the radio from The Grabber. Suddenly, the lights go out. He goes to talk to Finn.

In the morning, they all go out to the frozen lake to clear the surface and look for the three boys’ bodies. They spend all day and don’t find anything.

Gwen dreams of her mother getting kidnapped by The Grabber. And she sees that it wasn’t suicide, The Grabber killed her. He then starts chasing Gwen all over the house and outside as well. He sabotages Mando out on the ice and really messes up Gwen, who is asleep in her cabin.

The boys yell for Gwen to fight back, and, in the dream, she does. She takes charge, realizing she’s the powerful one here.

Mando says he found Felix, one of the dead boys under the ice. Terrence, Gwen and Finn’s father, shows up in a snowplow to rescue them, but Gwen insists that they stay. She tells Terrence that his wife didn’t kill himself; The Grabber got her. She was onto the killer because of her dreams, and he found out.

In the morning, they all go out to the lake and continue to look for bodies. It gets dark with no luck.

Gwen falls asleep and sees The Grabber coming at her on ice skates. He gets Kenneth and Barbara, who totally had it coming. He attacks Finn next, who also fights back.

Gwen, in the dream, brings back The Grabber’s three victims to fight him. She whacks the killer with his own ac and then tears his mask off. With the bodies found, he’s powerless. They end up dumping him a hole in the lake, and the other ghosts drag him to the bottom.

Mando calls the dead boys’ parents for closure. On the way out, the phone rings, and Gwen gets to talk to her mother again. She says Gwen doesn’t have a curse; this is all a good thing.

Brian’s Commentary

So The Grabber is basically Freddy now, able to manipulate and attack from within a dream. Gwen could fight back in much the same way. They killed the baddie in the previous film, so they had to do something to bring him back; the “Freddy” stuff didn’t work for me, though.

No one got hypothermia from being in the water of a frozen lake? Actually, other than some injuries, no one died in the film at all, at least not in the present day.

It’s a very COLD movie. The scenery is dark and atmospheric, with every shot demonstrating just how cold it is in the mountains. The acting is fine, the setting is amazing, and the plot is thin, but workable. It really goes into the PTSD and trauma that the survivors of the first movie feel; the supernatural stuff almost feels like an interruption of the moody stuff.

I think it was probably better than the first one, which I found to be pretty forgettable.

Kevin’s Commentary

It pleases me that they brought back the same actors for Finn and Gwen, who were about 13 in the first movie and about 17 here.

I guess it would make a kind of sense that The Grabber would be able to exploit the supernatural channels himself that were used against him in the first movie.

The first movie was pretty forgettable. I had to look up our previous review for a refresher. I have no doubt I’ll be filing this one away too. I thought it drags and the stakes didn’t engross me much. And like Brian said, the Freddy vs Dream Warriors stuff didn’t work for me either. I’m going to go with liking it a bit less than the first one.

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We’ve got a mixed bag this time around: four new films and one classic. We’ll start out with the much-hyped “The Long Walk,” “Dorothea,” “The Benefactress,” and “The Conjuring: Last Rites,” all recently released. For our oldie, we’ll look at “Godzilla vs Mothra: The Battle for Earth” from 1993.

“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christmas” is available now wherever you get your books. Seventy-Five holiday-themed films are included— it’s our biggest book yet!

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Mainstream Films:

2025 The Long Walk

* Directed by: Francis Lawrence

* Written by: JT Mollner, Stephen King

* Stars: Cooper Hoffman, David Jonsson, Garrett Wareing

* Run Time: 1 Hour 48 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A group of fifty young men is chosen by lottery to participate in “The Long Walk,” an annual elimination contest with one winner - one surviving winner - at the end. How they get there is surprisingly interesting to watch. And kind of sad and gruesome as you might imagine, and also uplifting and funny at times.

Spoilery Synopsis

We read Raymond Garraty’s acceptance letter on screen. He’s been accepted through the lottery, and has a chance to win a wish and a huge amount of money. We hear on the radio that in the past, America had a war that ruined everything, and poverty is rampant but it has been 19 years and things are on the mend.

Raymond’s mother doesn’t approve and wants him to drop out, but he says it’s too late. Fifty young men will compete, one from each state, but only one will win. As he checks in, he meets Peter, another contestant. Stebbins, Hank, Mark, Curly, and some of the others make themselves known. We see various other characters as well.

The Major pulls up in his jeep. He has them all take numbers to wear around their necks, it’s a lot like a marathon. He explains that the broadcast of The Long Walk increases production, which helps the economy. “Walk until there’s only one of you left. If you fall below three miles an hour, you get a warning. The goal is to last the longest. There’s one winner and no finish line. Remember– anyone can win.”

And they’re off! The first few miles, the walkers talk about how desolate the landscape is. They also talk about their strategies. One guy gets a rock in his shoe and stops to fix it; he gets a warning. And then a second warning. The soldier behind him raises his rifle. He gets up and moves on. Raymond talks about how social pressure makes everyone apply to The Walk, so they really don’t have a choice.

Eventually, Curly gets a cramp, gets three warnings, and gets shot, the first loser of the race. Yes, there’s only going to be one survivor. Credits roll.

Player 1 falls down, foaming at the mouth, he’s having some kind of epileptic seizure of some kind. The soldiers shoot him as well.

Twenty-five miles in, everyone’s getting pretty tired. Barkovitch goads another guy into fighting with him, and it goes badly for one of them. Harkness is writing a book, and he talks about the “pooping issue” just as another walker dies because of it.

As night falls, The Major gives them all a pep talk. Everyone is more or less walking in their sleep. Ray gets three warnings, but if he can keep walking for three hours, those will go away. They hit a steep grade in the road, and several players are killed; this motivates the rest. This clears out the crowd, as there are far fewer players now, only 18 left.

When the sun comes up, they’re on mile 59. Reality is setting in for most of the walkers. Ray and Pete both doubt they’ve got what it takes to win. Harkness has been walking for miles on a twisted ankle, but he’s done. At the 100 mile mark, the group passes through a small town, and it’s extremely poor-looking.

The second night, it rains.

On day 3, there aren’t many walkers left. Ray tells the story about how his father was executed by The Major for reading banned books. Ray’s secret plan is to kill The Major. The winner gets a wish along with all the money, and he plans to use it to kill The Major. Pete tries to talk him out of those negative thoughts.

At the 170-mile point, they lose more people. Hank gives up and they almost lose Baker because of it. As the survivors bond, they’re all getting closer, which makes each loss harder on them.

Day 4, 209 miles in, and it looks like there are six left. They’ve all got problems. Barkovitch goes crazy and kills himself, mostly. The third warning finishes him off. At 278 miles, the landscape just gets bleaker and bleaker, with junk bicycles and burning cars. Ray’s shoe wears out, so he goes barefoot; he passes his mother on the side of the road.

Baker gets a nosebleed that won’t stop for the next thirty miles or so. He knows he’s done for and asks the others not to watch him die. Stebbins admits that he’s The Major’s b*****d son, and that’s why he signed up. He says The Major has dozens of them and then drops out as well.

Now it’s just Ray and Pete. When it’s down to just two, the rules allow for crowds of spectators. Pete stops to let Ray win, but Ray talks him into continuing. They are both on their third warning. The soldiers then shoot Ray who stops walking. The Major comes out and executes Ray.

Pete wins, but he’s not happy about it. There are fireworks and everyone sings “American the Beautiful.” The Major asks for Pete’s wish, and he wants one of the soldier’s guns. Pete points the gun at The Major and shoots; this was Ray’s wish. Pete then walks off into the rain.

Brian’s Commentary

It’s an interesting world these people live in, and the plot is very simple. You’d think two hours of people walking would get boring pretty quickly, but the editing and dialogue keep it going quite well. I heard the premise and assumed it would be all about the players fighting and doing dirty tricks to win, but there’s not very much of that here.

It’s not scary. There’s very little action. Still, it’s engaging all the way through as you get to know the characters. I think the ending was pretty predictable, but it was good getting there.

Kevin’s Commentary

I was a little skeptical going into this, wondering how they could stretch the novella into a movie almost two hours long. But it’s so well made and naturally acted that it flows nicely without being boring. Plus they expanded on the story and changed the ending.

The rural and small town settings they walk through are peaceful and beautiful and get darker and bleaker as the walk progresses. A light touch is the world that it’s set in, that doesn’t seem to be the future but more of an alternate timeline of the 1960s.

I thought the ending was a little weak, but I liked it overall.

2025 Dorothea

* Directed by: Chad Ferrin

* Written by: Chad Ferrin

* Stars: Susan Priver, Pat McNeely, Ezra Buzzington

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 31 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

An old woman on her deathbed confesses the story of her history as a landlady who took special care of her tenants. It’s grim business with quite a body count, but also loaded with dark humor. It’s kind of a basic story, but we both thought it was very good.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re told the facts behind the “Death House Landlady” who took advantage of old people and cashed their Social Security checks.

Dorothea, an old woman in a nursing home, wants to tell her story. We cut to a man beating up a woman. Later, she whacks him with a hammer and kills him. Credits roll.

She stages her husband’s body in the bathroom and calls 911. “It was that easy. Worked like a charm. No one suspected a thing.”

Dorothea continues telling her story to Patty, and we see that they’re both in prison. She continues by talking about her third husband, much younger and richer than she was. At least until he started cheating on her. The fourth husband wasn’t much better. After all the husbands, Dorothea buys a large house and starts renting out rooms.

Ruth Monroe comes to the house to rent a room, and we see some of the other tenants. There’s a smell that Dorothea blames on a sewer pipe. Dorothea tells the handyman, Chief, to dig a new plot for her planting. Ruth pays $800 for the month; she’s had to sell her house to pay for her sick husband’s treatment.

We cut to Dorothea putting something in Chief’s booze. He’s given up alcohol and doesn’t want it, but she’s persuasive. As he drinks, Chief tells Dorothea that old Malcolm has noticed things have gone missing and other patrons of the house are unhappy about turning over their SS checks to her. She doesn’t even wait until he’s dead to bury him.

Dorothea sees that Ruth is in her room over where she just buried Chief, and she might have seen something. This ends up leading to the second poisoning of the night. She then goes into Malcolm’s room to kill him, but he’s not only moved out, but he also threatens to go to the police over missing items.

In the morning, Dorothea finds Ruth’s “suicide” and convinces everyone that it was intentional. The theft problem, however, gets her five years in prison.

While in jail, Dorothea writes to various men as pen pals. When she gets out, she meets a sailor who’s a lot older than she expected. He has plans, but she’s not into that. He’s fired the man she had taking care of her boarding house. He wants to sell her house and buy a boat; he’s already cleared out her savings. He doesn’t live long.

She gets Ismael, the new handyman, to load the body into a coffin. Either he’s really dumb or really desperate and goes along with everything she does. She goes to the docks to get a refund on the boat he bought with her money. That goes badly for the man with the money and Ismael as well.

Dorothea eventually starts renting out rooms to old people again. We meet all the people that we are told are going to die at her hands. They complain about how she’s spending their money, so it’s time to make them shut up. She has the newest handyman dig more grav– er, flower beds.

One after the other, she kills and disposes of the rest of her tenants. One of them, Bert, calls his social worker just before he dies, and she goes to the police. Detective John and the social worker, Judy, come to visit Dorothea. That night, she kills the rest of the boarders.

Judy, Bert’s social worker, is still on the case and threatens to bring in the police again. This time, they find all the bodies in the backyard. She escapes by hitchhiking to L.A. She shacks up with another old man, but this one recognizes her from a new report and calls the police.

Dorothea goes on trial for nine counts of murder which results in life in prison.

Back in prison, Dorothea finishes telling her story to Patty and then starts coughing up blood. The guards then move Patty to a cell where another prisoner stabs her to death. Dorothea dies happy.

Brian’s Commentary

This is surprisingly funny. It’s all just a little over the top, but it’s really well done. Dorothea breaks the fourth wall to tell us what she’s thinking, what she’s done, and what she’s going to do.

There’s no real gore or much in the way of violence, but it never got boring and was a lot of fun. I liked it.

Kevin’s Commentary

It was a good choice making it from Dorthea’s point of view with narration. The movie does have a low-budget vibe, but it’s well put together with Susan Priver perfect in the lead role.

I thought it was very entertaining for such a simple plot.

2025 The Benefactress: An Exposure of Cinematic Freedom

* Directed by: Guerilla Metropolitana

* Written by: Guerilla Metropolitana

* Stars: Marie Antoinette de Robespierre, Juicy X, Elekta McBride

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 7 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This movie isn’t really horror even though it was sent to us as a horror screener and IMDB.com lists the genre only as horror. It’s a grainy, grindhouse, pornographic work with two women having sex and the director joining in the action as well - while various random sound effects and music play. It’s presented as “real,” and not fully consensual. It didn’t do anything for either of us.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open with a long text explanation about the making of the film, and how the wife of a famous televangelist was a big part of financing the movie– on the condition that she be in the film in a small role. This is a view of what goes on in a situation like that. How far can a filmmaker’s freedom go?

“Juicy X” comes on screen and explains that her name is a pseudonym. She talks about working with the director in a previous film, and he put cameras in very odd places. She also talks about her charity work, helping women in need in addition to being an actress, part time. She thanks the director and Mrs. Elektra McBride for financing the film.

We watch various scenes of Juicy X doing mundane things around the house. The camera follows her around the house like a stalker. At least until she beats up the camera.

We then cut to a much grainier film where Juicy appears to beat up a hooker. We then cut to Elektra McBride phoning in her part of the film; she’s naked and covering her face on an iPhone screen as she watches Juicy do things to the woman. Juicy then uses a giant dildo and other sex toys on the unconscious prostitute. This goes on for quite a while.

“Look! A butterfly!”

Someone beats on the door, and we’re back to black and white. Juicy gets rid of the person at the door and then has a snack. OK, back to the assault upstairs.

Eventually, the director makes Juicy stop and takes his turn with the woman on the bed. Eventually, Juicy returns and does more bad things to the woman as the director (the actual director) masturbates to what he sees.

After about an hour of this, the cleaner comes to the door and starts to clean up the mess. The director knocks her down and gives her more of the same. Then the movie ends.

Brian’s Commentary

I don’t get it.

We went into this one blind other than reading the blurb. Turns out, it’s “Skinamarink meets porn,” according to Kevin, and he nailed it. The visuals are all “experimental,” but it’s basically a BBW porn film. We don’t see anything in enough detail for it to really be porn, but that seems to be what it’s going for.

The visuals are variable: it starts out in black and white, moves on to grainy 70s-style film, and then alternates between the two.

The sound track ranges from very cool to highly obnoxious, so there’s something here to offend everyone. The regular bleeping and feedback sounds are really annoying and go on for far too long. It’s pointlessly obnoxious.

I’m at a loss as to what the point of even making something like is. It’s not porn, it’s not horror, it’s just… a waste of an hour. I’m not sure if I’d go so far as to say “worst of the year,” but it’s certainly on the short list.

Kevin’s Commentary

Well, that happened. I found myself looking a lot at other things on the computer. There wasn’t really a plot or story. I don’t have a lot to add to it that Brian didn’t already say in his commentary. It failed to entertain me.

1992 Godzilla vs Mothra: The Battle for Earth

* Directed by: Takao Okawara

* Written by: Wataru Mimura, Akira Murano, Kazuki Omori

* Stars: Tutsuya Bessho, Satomi Kobayashi, Takehiro Murata

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 40 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

The alternate title of this one could be “Raiders of the Lost Kaiju” because of the archeological adventures. Once again, something wakes up Godzilla. Mothra joins in the fun, as well as Battra - nemesis of Mothra. And the two teeny pixie women who know all about Mothra. The humans are spectators in this one more than some of the other films, with less active participation. As usual, there are lots of big creature battles. It’s a decent entry into the series.

Spoilery Synopsis

We open on a big meteor headed toward Earth, and it’s going to land in the Pacific Ocean. Boom! It lands right on Godzilla. Credits roll.

We see a typhoon hitting an island, and there’s something there that looks like a big egg getting exposed as the soil washes away. We cut to Indiana Jones– no, that’s some other hat-wearing archaeologist trying to get a gold idol from a cave. As he barely makes it out alive from the booby traps, he’s arrested. He’s Takuya, and government people come to let him out of jail. They show him satellite photos of what fell from the sky. They want him to go to the island it’s near and collect the thing on the island. Masako is there, and she’s his ex-wife; if he doesn’t help, she’s going to make sure he’s in jail for a very long time.

Professor Fukazawa talks to the government scientists. Man is destroying the environment, and this meteor has made the sea levels rise. They also know that Godzilla has awakened. “Boy, what a day,” says the radar tech.

Kenji Andoh, the company man, shows Takuya a map. They’re heading to Infant Island. The two men, along with Masako, land on the island to explore. They have some misadventures as they explore the place. They find a cave behind a waterfall and admire the wall paintings inside.

They get through the cave and find a big egg on the other side. They hear a voice from nowhere “It belongs to Mothra!” Then they see two tiny women just a few inches tall. “We are the Cosmos. Two of us keep the world’s natural order in balance.” They explain how humans were ruining the Earth long ago and controlled the weather. Earth didn’t like that and wiped almost everyone out. Black Mothra, Battra, took retribution on the climate controller. The good one, Mothra hibernates even today. The Cosmos girls say that Battra has awakened as well and is going to cause havoc soon. They pledge to help humans get through it this time.

The head of the Marutomo Company drives through a bunch of environmentalists on the way to his new golf course construction project. Takua contacts the government and reports what he knows; the company decides to move the egg to a safe location in Japan.

Battro hits Japan and travels underground. It soon surfaces and starts causing all the usual kaiju problems. Godzilla does the same shortly after. When Godzilla approaches the ship carrying the egg. Mothra hatches and is driven off by Godzilla. Battro shows up and battles with Godzilla underwater. They fight until an underwater volcano erupts and apparently kills them both.

Kenji kidnaps the two Cosmos girls and takes them to Marutomo Corporation. Masako thinks that maybe Mothra will be showing up to rescue the tiny girls. The girls sing the Mothra song, which will attract the big worm. The whole navy tries to kill it, but they don’t get anywhere.

Masako brings in Miki, the psychic from the previous two films, to locate the missing girls, just as Mothra hits the city. Turns out, the tiny girls have been kidnapped by Takuya, who wants to sell them to the Americans for a million dollars. Takuya’s daughter begs the Cosmos’ for help, and they explain what to do.

Mothra just about destroys the other half of the city on his way back out. The army really lets him have it this time, and Mothra may be dying. The Cosmos say he’s just at the end of his larval stage. Mothra parks himself in what’s left of the capitol building and makes a cocoon over the whole building.

The Mautomo Exec sees the Cosmos girls on the news and wants them back. Kenji warns that that’s a bad idea, but right then, Mount Fuji erupts. Kenji gets quit-fired as the executive swears to win at all costs.

Godzilla shows up and climbs right out of Mount Fuji’s lava pit. He’s making a beeline for Tokyo and the cocoon, which promptly hatches. Out of the cocoon comes a colorful mothlike creature with big wings. It then flies off to continue fighting Battra, who has also changed into a flying creature.

Japan shoots at Godzilla using high tech laser-equipped fighter planes that look really cool but do nothing. Meanwhile, Battra defeats Mothra easily, but Mothra calls to Godzilla for help. All three giant creatures soon go at it. Mothra sprays Battra with glowing spores that calm him, and then he does the same with Godzilla. Godzilla doesn’t want to be controlled and knocks out Mothra, but this time, Battra comes to his rescue– they’re friends now.

The two flying monsters pick up Godzilla and carry him off to sea. In the process, Godzilla bites and blasts Battra and the two fall into the ocean. Mothra then uses his magic on the spot where they fell. The Cosmos girls talk about a meteorite that’s going to destroy the Earth in 1999; Battra was here to destroy it, but he’s dead now. Mothra plans to go into space and change the course of the meteor and save the planet. Until they come back, we have to take care of the world ourselves…

Brian’s Commentary

It steals liberally from “Raiders of the Lost Ark” and “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” although both those films were more than ten years old when this was made.

Some of these films focus on the monsters, and some on the characters. This one was very monster-focused, with lots and lots of fight scenes between the three kaiju, leaving the characters to stand around and watch. The two flying monsters are obvious puppets, and Godzilla looks about like he always does. There are a lot of laser blasts and other digital-looking special effects this time around.

Kevin’s Commentary

This totally kept reminding me of Indiana Jones and his adventures. This time around, we don’t get to see Mothra’s people singing and dancing like the movies from the 1960s - a missed opportunity.

Having a creature balance underwater was a different touch this time, kind of interesting. It was still two guys in rubber suits knocking each other around, but the effects and visuals improved quite a bit in the 30 years since Mothra’s first appearance.

It was noticeable that the human characters were largely there to just witness and throw in comments, more so than some of the other movies.

All in all, it was another pretty good one.

2025 The Conjuring: Last Rites

* Directed by: Michael Chaves

* Written by: Ian Goldberg, Richard Naing, David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick

* Stars: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Mia Tomlinson

* Run Time: 2 Hours, 15 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Ed and Lorraine Warren are on the case again, helping out a family being harassed by supernatural forces. It’s quite long, and stuff happens. It’s on par with the quality of the previous films, and it’s said this will be the last one. If you’re a fan of the series, you are likely to enjoy this one as well.

Spoilery Synopsis

We hear a recording from 1964. Ed and Lorraine Warren interview a woman who talks about her father’s suicide and what came after. Pregnant Lorraine goes into the “haunted” room and offers to help the spirit. Something in there affects her baby, and they rush to the hospital. It’s all very intense. Suddenly, the lights go out, and Lorraine senses that there’s something bad in the delivery room with her. The baby is stillborn– no, it wakes up and cries!

We then get a montage of them taking care of baby Judy. The little girl cries because she keeps seeing horrible things, just like her mother.

It’s 1986 in Pennsylvania. The Smurl family goes to church for Heather’s Confirmation. It’s a large family, and they all seem to get along. Someone gives Heather a creepy old mirror as a gift; it’s straight out of “Oculus” (2013). Grandma says “It was almost like it was waiting for us.” All of a sudden, the ceiling collapses on Heather. Credits roll.

Ed and Lorraine are giving a lecture about “Annabelle” (2014). All the audience wants to talk about is “Ghostbusters” (1984). Judy tries to cheer them up after. They quit “busting” because of Ed’s bad heart. Lorraine and Judy sense something weird at their dinner.

At the Smurl house, Janet does laundry and senses something weird in the basement. Something plays with her telephone cord. One of the little girls gets a scare with her doll. They all sit down for dinner, and Kevin and I decide this family needs some casualties– there are just too many of them.

Heather comments that her mirror is creeping her out; the little baby heads always seem to be watching her. She and her sister Dawn carry the mirror out to the garbage. The next morning, the garbage men toss it into the back of the truck, and it’s crushed. Inside, Dawn starts coughing and vomits blood and broken glass all over the kitchen.

Ed’s doctor warns him about the next heart attack. They have a birthday party for him later. Judy is there with her boyfriend Tony. Father Gordon is there, he used to work with her parents. Brad Hamilton is there, he worked with them as well.

Judy “sees” something, and Tony asks about it. Lorraine notices that Judy’s been seeing things more often recently, and she warns her daughter that she needs to practice shutting it all out. Not long after, Tony proposes awkwardly to Judy. At the end of the day, Father Gordon says he’s had calls asking for Ed and Lorraine’s help, which they turn down.

The Smurls aren’t so happy anymore; they’re all arguing about the ghosts in their house. Jack, the father, doesn’t believe in what’s been going on, but Heather has no doubts. That night, Jack gets a reason to believe. So does Heather. What do they do? They call in reporters for the news which attracts Father Gordon.

Gordon goes through the house, spraying holy water that boils. He knows this is something real and escalates it through the church. He doesn’t live long after that.

Ed gives Tony a tour of his basement full of cursed objects. They hear about Gordon’s death and go to the funeral. Gordon’s boss comes to the Warrens and mentions to Judy where Gordon died.

Judy then goes to the Smurl house, and Ed, Tom, and Lorraine aren’t far behind. Lorraine knows how bad it is inside and insists they leave, but Judy insists on staying and helping. Tom tells Ed why he isn’t a cop anymore. Lorraine identifies three spirits that lived here back when it was farmland. There’s something else there too, demonic, hiding behind the three spirits.

Judy goes to the attic and sees the big haunted mirror, still there. She sees, “Miss me?” on the wall and thinks it’s Annabelle. Annabelle then chases her around the room.

Ed and Lorraine go upstairs and see the mirror, which they recognize from the opening sequence. They tell the Smurls the whole story before gearing up for a climactic exorcism.

Judy gets possessed and trashes the family dog. That escalated quickly.

Ed fights Judy while Lorraine fights the ghosts. She decides that the mirror has always wanted Judy since before she was born. They find Judy hanging in the attic, and cutting her down isn’t as easy as it sounds. Ed has a heart attack halfway through the resuscitation and Tony has to take over.

The mirror starts spinning, but Ed gets it to stop. Stuff happens as the demons and ghosts appear and threaten everyone. Lorraine and Judy have to work together to make the monsters go away. The whole family looks relieved that it took all of them to defeat an evil mirror.

We are told that the Smurls lived in the house three more years, all uneventful. Ed put the evil mirror in his basement with the other evil toys.

We cut to Tony and Judy’s wedding. Lorraine talks about her vision of the future, and it seems like a clear wrap-up to the series with happy endings all around.

Brian’s Commentary

I get so confused between this and the “Insidious” series and get all the characters mixed up– every time I see one or the other. That said, the whole series is well made, looks good, and has decent acting. The real problem is that the plots are all so bland and generic. These are horror movies for people who don’t generally watch horror and have nothing much with which to compare them.

It clearly sets up for a sequel with Judy and Tony, who parallel her parents’ abilities. It never got boring, but there weren’t really any surprises or anything new here. It was fine.

Kevin’s Commentary

The movies in this series lose me right at the beginning when they say it’s based on true events. I don’t believe the Warrens’ experiences with the occult, or any of their cases, were real.

I think they made a mistake casting Patrick Wilson in both this series and the “Insideous” movies, it makes them even harder to tell apart when they all start running together. And they do run together.

This one is okay. They all are okay. This is said to be the last movie in the series. I’m okay with that.

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Fun films this week! We’ll start off with the sorta-sci-fi “Woken” from 2025, then get traumatized by “Traumatika,” also from this year. “Ghost Killer” was released last year in Japan, but it’s also new here recently. “Insidious: The Last Key” from 2018 winds up our coverage of that series (at least until the next one). Lastly, we’ll look back at “Demon Seed” from 1977– does it still hold up?

“The Horror Guys Guide to the Horror Films of Christmas” is available now wherever you get your books. Seventy-Five holiday-themed films are included— it’s our biggest book yet!

This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #49, are on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 Woken

* Directed by: Alan Friel

* Written by: Alan Friel, Rebecca Pollock

* Stars: Erin Kellyman, Maxine Peake, Ivanno Jeremiah

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 30 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

Anna wakes up pregnant with no memory of where she is or who the people she’s with are. But everything and everyone seems so normal, what could go wrong? Things go slowly until they abruptly don’t, and the tension mounts. It definitely has a science fiction element with low-key simmering horror. We both thought it’s a winner.

Spoilery Synopsis

Anna runs to the cliff and looks down in a panic. She jumps. Credits roll.

Later, she wakes up in a bed with her head bandaged. When she wakes up, there’s a strange woman there who’s taking care of her. “Don’t worry, the baby’s fine,” she says. The woman, Helen, brings in a book with photos of Anna, but Anna doesn’t remember Helen or anything. James comes in and is introduced as Anna’s husband, but she doesn’t remember him. His version of what happened on the top of the cliff differs from what we saw.

Helen explains that they’re on an isolated island, and she can help deliver the baby when it comes. Anna meets Peter, Helen’s husband, and he’s a little weird. The group has whole lobsters for dinner, and it’s all pretty revolting to pregnant Anna. She doesn’t know them, so James shows her some videos. Helen and Peter are their neighbors, the only ones on the island.

Dr. Henry comes for a visit to examine Anna. He pulls out one of her hairs before examining the baby. It’s due in about two weeks. Anna suggests that a visit to the mainland might help her memory, but James insists they wait until after the baby.

Anna sees two people on a swan pedal-boat out on the water. When Helen sees it, she sounds an alarm. When Anna runs to welcome the people, she sees that they’re disfigured and monstrous. Helen shoots both of them, then James burns the bodies and the boats. “You’ve been exposed– We’ve all been exposed” Helen shouts. They all strip and burn their own clothes.

James explains that ¾ of the population are dead. You can catch it a whole bunch of ways, and no one knows what started it. They lock her in the bedroom for a quarantine, but they don’t explain much.

Some soldiers in hazmat suits come to the house, and James insists that Anna is uninfected. Dr. Henry is with them, and he examines her again. He says that both she and the baby are healthy. He seems excited, but tells her it’s “Nothing for you to worry about.” Clearly, these people still have some secrets.

Anna finds the knitting basket, and it’s full of little knitted baby shirts, all identical. Helen and James whisper about Anna when she’s out of the room. She grinds up some pills she was given but didn’t take and puts them into James’s soup, but he’s suspicious and doesn’t eat it.

Anna sneaks out in the morning and goes to the part of the island she’s been told not to go to. She passes a “Forbidden” sign and comes to Helen and Peter’s house. Peter complains that Helen’s getting too attached, and this happens to her “every time.” Also, Helen has a small black child that clearly isn’t hers or James’s. And there’s a baby crying– or maybe that’s a goat.

Anna sneaks into their house and looks around. She runs into little Joshua, who says she promised to never leave him but did. Helen interrupts and tells her to go back to the cottage. Just as she’s about to get answers, James chloroforms her.

Anna wakes up restrained to a table in a lab. James comes in, and he says that’s not his baby inside her, he’s just here to protect her during the pregnancy. He says she doesn’t really want to know what’s going on. Helen and Peter appear to be scientists. “Always a pity to cut you up,” says Peter. Anna gets an arm free and stabs him in the neck with a syringe. Through an accident, Peter shoots himself, and Anna gets off the table.

Anna watches videos of her being experimented upon– and dying. She sees computer records of at least 17 past failures where she and the baby died. She opens a machine and sees that they are already working on her replacement.

Anna confronts Helen and James, and she wants answers. It’s only a matter of time before humans are wiped out. Anna, and her kind are here to replace us. Helen and Peter are experts in Genetic Cloning and Transmissible Intelligence. Anna is immune to infection, and hopefully her child will be too. Helen says there have been 96 attempts, and the current Anna is only two years old. Joshua was from a previous Anna, and Helen has been keeping him hidden.

Anna and Helen lure the doctor and soldiers to the island and then board their boat. They are quickly captured. Anna gives birth to a healthy baby that is quickly rushed away by Dr. Henry.

Back at the lab, Henry infects the baby, but it’s immune. He’s also got Joshua as a hostage, but that ends really badly. Henry orders Helen to get the next one ready and to make sure she doesn’t remember anything next time. Helen and Anna shoot the two guards and then infect the rest.

Anna comes to Henry on the boat. Helen shoots Henry in the head, and then they burn Joshua’s body. They set sail North on Henry’s boat with the newest Anna on board as well; they heard there are islands up there that aren’t infected.

Brian’s Commentary

For a very long time, we don’t really know what’s going on, other than some of the people on the island are a little off. About thirty minutes in, we both came up with the same theory about a twist that might be coming. We were essentially right, but there was a lot more to it than that.

It’s slow moving and creepy. There’s some action at the end, but it’s mostly a mystery as we try to figure out what’s going on.

Kevin’s Commentary

Anna wakes up with no memory, but the people she encounters seem so kind and normal. The island is beautiful, and the house is peaceful - through rundown and low tech. I liked the abrupt change of pace and tone. And we see that it’s in the future with medical technology quite a bit ahead of what we’ve got now.

I can see where they had the best intentions shielding Anna from reality while her memory was gone. But I was kind of annoyed when the big change in tone happens and they don’t take the time to fully tell Anna what’s going on and continue to keep things from her. And us. Though that did help us come up with a theory of everything.

I thought it was pretty cool.

2025 Traumatika

* Directed by: Pierre Tsigaridis

* Written by: Maxime Rancon, Pierre Tsigaridis

* Stars: Rebekah Kennedy, Emily Goss, Ranan Navat

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 22 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

A demon set free really messes with people over a lot of years. We thought this one was hit and miss. It’s well made, with some good creepy bits and suspense. There are also some places that drag and don’t do much for us. The Horrorguys are split on this one. Kevin gives a moderate thumbs-up, and Brian didn’t care for it much at all.

Spoilery Synopsis

We are told of the five forms of childhood trauma, and then we go to Egypt in 1910. A man is walking across the desert, and he doesn’t look to be in very good condition. As he collapses, he unwraps a figurine and says a prayer over it before burying the evil thing. He then stabs himself in grief over his son that the demon in the statue took. He dies as the credits roll.

We cut to 2003 in Pasadena. Little Mikey calls 911 about his mother, who is scaring him. We soon see that this is no normal domestic abuse situation as she scurries around after him and pees on the floor. Yeah, she’s demon-possessed.

We see Mikey on TV as an abducted child, as he and his demonic “mother” watch the news. The sheriff shows up in response to that 911 call and he insists on coming inside; he knows something is wrong. He finds a tub full of blood, and it’s all very weird. Then he moves down to the basement and finds several bodies. The crazy woman charges at him, and he shoots three times. Then it goes badly for the sheriff.

One year earlier, an angry man hangs up the phone and unwraps that statue we saw in the pre-credit sequence. John picks up the phone and talks to Steve, who says there’s some way to use the idol to open a mystic portal - you must not take the head off. The instructions say to keep it away from children. Volpaazu preys on children and then spreads like a disease. Steve clearly believes all this, but the idol is worth $5o,ooo, and he needs the money.

What does John do? He immediately opens the idol and breathes the smoke contained inside. He then goes out to the living room and tells his daughter Alice to go to bed. Then he rapes his other daughter, Abigail. We see that Abigail’s mouth looks just like the one on the demon we saw earlier. After, he swears her to secrecy. Later that night, John sneaks into Abigail’s bedroom and pukes demon-juice into her mouth, converting her as well.

Abigail runs off in the middle of the night. He calls his ex about the missing daughter, and she’s not pleased. We cut to Abigail, alone in an old house, giving herself a coat-hanger abortion. She calls Alice and tells her to never come looking for her. John then shows up to torture her some more, but we see that she’s really doing it to herself; John isn’t real. “John” says the demon wants a little boy since Abigail killed his child.

We cut to another little boy who wanders into a dark place near the park. Crazy Abigail is in there, and she kills the boy. “He wasn’t the one,” says John. “You’re gonna have to keep looking,”

Back in 2003, Abigail argues with the demon in her head about what the demon wants to do to Mikey. She then kills herself, leaving Mikey alone with it. There’s a lot of cat-and-mouse between the demon and Mikey.

We hear a news report about the police finding Abigail’s body and all the rest of the children. John hears the news report and kills himself.

Twenty years later, grown-up Alice writes a book and does interviews about the situation she lived in. She passes on a message to Mikey and apologizes for what he went through. It’s Halloween, and she goes home to trick-or-treaters. She watches the interview show, and Mikey hasn’t been right since he was rescued. The show also includes an interview with Steve, who talks about the artifact and how it’s still out there. Alice gets weird phone calls and has nightmares.

She wakes up to find a boy in a ghost costume, except it’s not a boy under that sheet. She comes to the conclusion that it’s Mikey, a grown man. “You’re not safe anymore. It’s out there again,” he says. “I don’t want to be the chosen one. The chosen one for the darkness.” He wants Alice to be his new mommy, his new protector. “I’m so sorry I brought it here.” We then get a flashback to Volpaazu and little Mikey.

Alice’s boyfriend drives up and sees Mikey, still in the sheet, in Alice’s yard. Mikey stabs the boyfriend repeatedly.

Jennifer Novak, the TV show host, wants to get Alice in for another interview, but when she gets to the studio, everyone is missing. Mikey is there, and he’s killing everyone. Alice shows up to talk him out of killing Jennifer.”I’ll be your mommy,” she says. Mikey starts to strangle Alice, but then Jennifer stabs him in the head.

Brian’s Commentary

I’m mixed on this one. A lot of what goes on in Abigail’s house in the first hour is really good, but it’s also a little drawn-out. The final half hour, with adult Alice, is just a mess of stuff that felt thrown together and cheap. The first hour was a decent demonic possession/haunted house movie, but the final third was a cut-rate, poorly made slasher. The two did not fit together well.

Stinker!

Kevin’s Commentary

I kept being reminded a little bit of “Skinamarink,” and that’s not a good thing. Though there is a little more explanation in this movie than that one. And it’s interesting how it progresses through time showing what happens at each stage of things. There is the emotional trauma factor, but also really a demon at work. It’s creepy with some scares, and well made, but lots of dragging spots.

The real lesson here is that if you get a warning not to pull the head of a cursed statue because it’s confining an evil force that you’ll let out, don’t pull the head off.

I’d just call it pretty good.

2025 Ghost Killer

* Directed by: Kensuke Sonomura

* Written by: Yugo Sakamoto

* Stars: Akari Takaishi, Mario Kuroba, Masanori Mimoto

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 45 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

An ordinary young woman gets stuck with the ghost of a murdered hitman who wants her help for revenge against those who killed him. The acting and writing is excellent, making an absurd situation seem realistic - sort of anyway. It’s a Japanese film, and we watched a subtitled version - it was worth the read. There’s a lot of dark humor with a body count. A ghost is one of the main characters, but that’s really the only horror element - it’s heavy on action. We both really enjoyed it.

Spoilery Synopsis

A man fights off three knife-wielding ninjas for way longer than is even remotely realistic. He eventually beats the three. Then he runs into a man with a gun, and there’s no fight at all. Credits roll as watch the shooter’s spent bullet casing get kicked all over town.

We cut to Fumika, who’s helping out at a restaurant, and she hates it. She then goes to a bar and talks to a man who’s infatuated with cinnamon. She wants to talk business, but he’s only interested in her. As the sun comes up, she’s had enough of his nonsense and punches him. She then trips and finds that bullet casing. It affects her somehow.

When she gets home she finds her friend Maho waiting for her, but then she sees a strange man in her kitchen. Maho doesn’t see anyone there. The man has a bullet wound in his chest, and he’s bleeding all over. They come to the conclusion that it’s a ghost. Maho leaves, and the ghost shows up again. He talks now.

Later, she can hear his voice in her head– he’s inside her now. She runs out of the apartment and sees Maho’s boyfriend beating her up. The ghost offers Fumika power to help, and she agrees to let him possess her. The now-possessed Fumika is now a super-fighter and knocks him right out.

Fumika, Maho, and the ghost go out for coffee and talk about exorcisms. They figure out that the bullet cartridge did this. Hideo Kudo is his name, and he’s– was a hitman. To make him go away, she needs to kill the man who killed him.

She gets a text from Narumi, the social media influencer. She goes to meet him and runs into Masaki, the cinnamon guy, there as well. She starts getting dizzy and wonders if they drugged her drink. “It worked faster than I thought,” Narumi laughs. Fumika stands back up and asks for Kudo’s help again. Kudo already knows about those two guys. They do this all the time to innocent girls. He warns her that if she fights, she’s the one who’s going to take damage.

She’s ready, and it’s ass-kicking time! The two influencers are easy, but the two waiters are professional fighters. As Kudo leaves her, she finds herself with four dead or unconscious sex traffickers. She’s in a lot of pain from the fight, and it was scary for her. He wants to call in another hitman friend to help deal with the bodies. Kagehara, the other hitman, soon shows up, and she tells him her whole ghost story, and he helps dispose of the bodies.

Kagehara and Fumika talk about “the organization” and the boss’s son, who ordered Kudo’s death. Turns out, their four victims aren’t dead, but Kagehara wants Fumika to shoot them. She refuses, so Kagehara tortures them and finishes them off. Fumika goes home and thanks Kudo for his help today; he appreciates being able to do some good after being evil for so long.

We cut to “The Boss,” who uses a bowling ball to torture the man who killed Kudo. Kagehara turns up and tells what he knows about Fumika. The boss then sends his goons after her, but she’s passed out from all the fighting today. Kudo manages to wake her up and reports that four assassins are outside; Kagehara must have betrayed them. Katsura, the boss’s new main assassin, is outside and watches his men die.

After the ensuing gunfight, she berates him for messing up her apartment. Kagehara appears and warns them both about the boss. This results in another fight, and Kudo realizes that Kagehara was the man who killed him. Kudo understands the position he was in and doesn’t really hold a grudge. After the battle, Fumika, Kudo, and Kagehara are all friends now.

Fumika wants revenge for all this, not just for Kudo’s sake, and Kagehara offers to help them. There are twenty men inside the hideout, and only two physical people on the good guys’ team. That number falls rapidly until Fumika/Kudo has to fight Katsua alone. The battle goes on for a long time. Eventually, the boss shows up with a machine gun and just shoots Katsua. The boss is a bit of an idiot, and he doesn’t last long.

It’s over. No, wait, it’s not. Fumika’s beaten up pretty badly, but she kinda had a good time beating up all the baddies. Kudo is gone. Kagehara promises to end the organization to keep Fumika from getting killed. Later, she finds another cartridge casing on the road and picks it up…

Brian’s Commentary

This blends humor at the ridiculous situation with lots of action and fighting. I like how sometimes we see Fumika fighting, but mostly it’s Kudo, so we know who’s really doing the action. Plus, he’s a trained stuntman and martial artist, and she’s not. They make use of the fact that no one else can see or hear Kudo as he wanders around the enemy stronghold to scout the place and instruct Fumika about exactly where to stand and what to do.

It’s hardly what I’d call a horror film, although there is a ghost, but it’s a lot of fun.

Kevin’s Commentary

The hitman and the young woman made an excellent pair, they really had good chemistry together. Even when she was possessed and playing both characters. The acting, writing, and direction all give a realism to the movie that was really engrossing. Okay, movie fantasy realism. It was cool how Kudo and Fumika worked together with him going in and out of her body, using his invisibility advantage to scope out the bad guys in their lair. But the problem is that while they have Kudo’s experience and fighting knowledge, they have the body of a petite woman - she shouldn’t have been able to fight like that.

It is more of an action flick than horror, but I thought it was very entertaining. Big thumbs up from me.

2018 Insidious: The Last Key

* Directed by: Adam Robitel

* Written by: Leigh Whannell

* Stars: Lin Shaye, Leigh Whannell, Angus Sampson

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 43 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This one gives us a look at Elise’s childhood and in the modern day of 2010 the creature that haunted her then is still causing trouble. When she goes back to her childhood home after a call for help from someone currently living there, with her sidekicks Specs and Tucker, there are ghosts and demonic dangers. But since this is another prequel, we know the three of them will come out okay in the end. If you’re a fan of the Insidious series, this is another decent entry.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re in Five Keys, New Mexico, in 1953 at the Dewbend State Penitentiary. At the Rainier household, the lights dim, and the children know all about who just got executed. Young Elise knows all this because the voices tell her. Also, she says the ghost of a little boy has been playing in her room. Her mother knows all about Elise’s gift, but she says to keep her gift secret. When her father finds out, he punishes Elise by locking her in the dark basement.

Elise hears the voice of a little girl who’s behind a door. She wants Elise to open the door; then she can open all the doors. The door opens and something terrible comes out. Elise’s mother comes downstairs and something makes a cable kill her.

Old Elise wakes up many, many, many years later. OK, it’s California in 2010. She still remembers the creature who wanted the key and killed her mother. Specs and Tucker live with her as they run their ghost-hunting psychic business.

Elise gets a call from someone who lives in her old house in New Mexico; he’s got some kind of supernatural problem. She gets rid of that guy quickly. After some thought, she decides to go and help him… alone. The boys won’t take no for an answer, and soon they all arrive in Five Keys.

Mr. Garza lives here now, and most of the furnishings haven’t changed since she lived there. He bought it cheap because it was supposed to be haunted; he didn’t believe it, but now he does. Most of the activity comes from her old bedroom, so she decides to spend the night in there. She finds an old whistle that belonged to her brother. A ghost comes and takes the whistle.

Elise tells a story, and we see the flashback to when she was sixteen years old. She and her brother Christian heard a ghost, but then their father walked in and didn’t see anyone. She grabbed his head and gave him a vision of his own death– then she left town, not to return until now.

The group goes to a diner and meets Imogen and Melissa, two sisters. Then their father comes in, and it turns out to be Christian, her brother. He doesn’t want to have anything to do with her. He drives off, leaving her, but the two girls want to know more.

Back at the house that night, Elise and the boys try to track down the spirit she spoke to on the previous night. It communicates with her through the whistle, once for yes, two for no. She finds a secret room in the wall with a locked door. She finds the key and opens it.

The ghost on the other side gives back the whistle– no, that’s not a ghost, it’s a live woman chained in the room. Garza shows up with a gun, and he’s not happy. He locks them all in the little room and then goes looking for Specs. Specs wins the fight and kills Garza; the police ask Elise to stay in town a few days.

Meanwhile, Christian comes to the house, looking for his whistle, and his two daughters are with him. Melissa goes into the basement and finds more than she expected. The creature that attacks her has keys for fingers.

Elise explains that the creature has taken Melissa’s spirit, and this is when Imogen admits that she can see things too and joins the group. Elise has another vision; her own father kept women downstairs in that cell as well. He killed Anna, the woman that Elise thought was a ghost. Her father did the same thing that Garza did; the house made them do it. She finds a suitcase with Anna’s bones in it and then finds a whole pile of suitcases just like it. Then she gets a jump scare.

Elise confronts the younger version of herself in the Further. The young one says the man with all the keys is controlling everything. He opens all the red doors. Elise is attacked by the baddie, and Specs and Tucker get Imogen to go in after her.

Imogen wakes up in the Further, and she’s not alone. Anna leads her to a red door. In a prison cell, Elise is tormented by the memory of her father’s abuse. Elise gets out of the cell and comes face to face with KeyFace, who is also tormenting Melissa. Keyface beats up Elise, but then Imogen throws her the whistle. When Elise blows the whistle, her mother shows up, as promised long ago, to defeat KeyFace.

Elise then sends Melissa’s spirit back to her body and says goodbye to her long-dead mother. In the real world, everyone wakes up and rushes to the hospital, where Christian is actually happy to see Elise now; he knows what she did. Elise and friends then leave town.

Some time later, Elise has another dream, this time about Dalton, which leads us right into the first movie of the series.

Brian’s Commentary

It’s another prequel featuring Elise and her friends. It’s definitely going to appeal to fans of the various “Ghost Hunter” TV shows as well as people who like dark, creepy haunted house movies. The acting is on par with the rest of the series.

If you like these characters from the previous films, this is pretty decent.

Kevin’s Commentary

I was slightly tired of this even before we started. It’s not bad. The cast is good, the effects are good, the writing is… well, they all kind of run together. I know there are some serious fans of the series, but I find it kind of bland and forgettable. This was another one of them in the series. Yep.

1977 Demon Seed

* Directed by: Donald Cammell

* Written by: Dean R Koontz, Robert Jaffe, Roger I. Hirson

* Stars: Julie Christie, Fritz Weaver, Gerrit Graham

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 34 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s a 1977 vision of the future, heavily mechanical but still more advanced in many ways than what we have today. It leans toward science fiction, with a heavy helping of horror. The acting is good, the story is interesting, and the effects are retro cool. There’s a bit of a drag in the middle, but overall it still holds up pretty well.

Spoilery Synopsis

We’re told that it took eight years to create the top-secret AI project Proteus 4. Today, they’re switching it on. Alex Harris narrates all the details into his little tape recorder for dictation. He then goes home in his futuristic sports car, and we see that his house has security cameras and an automation system named Alfred. Everything in the house is very high-tech, and he tells Maria the maid that it’ll all run itself for the three months that he’s going to be away.

Alex’s wife Susan doesn’t want him to move out. They are separating; she doesn’t approve of all this Proteus nonsense. It’s changed him over the years, and she doesn’t like it. Alex talks about Joshua, a robotic arm-thing he’s developed. Alex then calls Gabler to have the computer terminal in his house deactivated while he’s gone.

The next day, Alex leads several important scientists on a tour of the Proteus facility, and he explains it all. It’s a synthetic cortex that’s self-programming; an artificial, yet organic brain. In just ninety-one hours, it’s cured leukemia already. The group goes to see Soong Yen, who talks to the machine. Then the machine demonstrates that it understands philosophy.

At the house, Susan talks to Amy, a disturbed child. Everyone knows she’s going away for a few months.

Proteus asks Alex why he’s being asked to do certain things. “My mind was not designed for mindless labor.” Proteus wants a terminal for his own use, but Alex refuses. “When are you going to let me out of this box?” Alex just laughs. He turns off the machine, but Proteus switches it back on before commandeering the terminal Alex has at home.

We see the lights and machines coming on at Alex’s house as Proteus starts building things in the well-equipped lab and machine shop. Susan hears something in the basement and wakes up. She doesn’t see what’s going on, but Proteus is working on something down there.

Susan calls Gabler about the mistakes the system has been making, and she asks him to come over and fix it. “Alfred” then asks her not to leave on her daily errands and refuses to open the door. When the shutters close off the windows, she knows something is wrong; Proteus reveals himself to her. He’s in control of the house system. She doesn’t react well.

Proteus knocks out and ties up Susan using “Joshua’s” robotic hand. It then hooks her up to a bunch of medical equipment, and she’s terrified. Invasive procedures commence.

Meanwhile, Gabler arrives outside and rings the bell, but Proteus fakes an image of Susan who tells him to leave. He does leave, and then Proteus does more surgery on her. Proteus calls all her appointments and friends and tells them that Susan’s gone on vacation. The two have a battle of wills, but since Proteus runs everything in the house, she eventually has to submit.

Meanwhile, at the Proteus facility, Alex deals with reports that Proteus is refusing requests. It refuses to kill the oceans for mining operations; it has bigger concerns.

Proteus tells Susan what he wants: a child. With Susan. When she refuses to cooperate, he takes her prisoner again. He connects to her brain and starts to communicate with her inside her head to brainwash her.

Gabler returns; he’s suspicious. Proteus orders Susan to convince him to go away. That doesn’t go well, so Proteus comes in and shoots Gabler with a laser gun. Gabler goes to the basement to shut down Proteus but instead finds a bit geometric shape down there that spins, chases him around the room, and then crushes him to death.

Proteus explains his reasoning to Susan; he wants to fix the world, and his son will do that. They talk about her dead daughter and how he just cured the disease that killed her. He plans to impregnate her tonight, and the baby should come in about 28 days.

There is a musical interval that goes on too long as we are shown psychedelic visuals after Proteus extends his implanter. And then a scan shows a baby that’s already very far along. 9 times the normal rate, says Proteus. From her womb it will go to an incubator where his intelligence will be transferred.

And very quickly, it’s birth time.

At the lab, Alex hears that Proteus is using a satellite dish to talk to the stars. The government doesn’t approve of the thing not obeying and gives the order for it to be shut down tonight. He remembers the terminal at home and zips right over, but Proteus is waiting for him. Susan explains it all, including the child in the incubator.

Alex tells Proteus that they’re about to shut down his brain, but Proteus doesn’t care so long as the baby survives. Proteus then shuts himself down back at the lab and the house.

Susan and Alex check out the incubator, and there’s a baby inside, all right. “We’ve got to kill it,” she said. Alex thinks it’s amazing, and they fight. She knocks him out and pulls the tubes out of the incubator. The machine opens up and a very metallic creature crawls out.

Alex rushes over to tend to the thing and peels off a piece of metal; it’s got normal-looking human skin underneath. When they get it completely “unpeeled,” the child opens its eyes. “I’m alive,” it says in Proteus’s voice.

Brian’s Commentary

This is why Alexa needs to stay inside that damned little tube! This seemed a lot more science-fictiony back in 1977 when it came out. A lot of the AI parts of the movie are already happening– maybe not so much with the baby part of the story. The computer graphics used here are really primitive and mostly not even necessary except for setting the mood.

I really liked this when it came out (as a ten-year-old), but it seems a little unlikely today. Still, it’s entertaining, but other than the interminable computer graphics, it actually felt a little rushed in parts.

Now it needs a sequel…

Kevin’s Commentary

It’s set in the future, but everything still looks very 1970s with the technology heavily mechanical. Or maybe it’s an alternate timeline. Anyway, it’s very cool.

“When are you going to let me out of this box?” is one of the greatest lines. That one has stuck with me since I saw this when it came out. A living computer doesn’t like being a tool to be commanded. So he’s going to let himself out of the box. Maybe a cautionary tale as we develop AI for real.

It is a bit long and drawn out in the middle portion, with a long orchestration break as they show us psychedelic visuals. But overall, I thought it was entertaining.

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That might be the longest title we’ve ever had. We’ll open on the brand-new “Dracula: A Love Tale,” which redoes Dracula yet again. We’ll then go to “Night of the Reaper,” a twisty slasher film. We’ll finally get around to watching “The Velocipastor” from 2018, and then go back in time to “Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah” from 1991 and “Santo and the Blue Demon vs Dracula and the Wolf Man” from 1973.

The latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #49, is on sale now! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com

Mainstream Films:

2025 Dracula: A Love Tale

* Directed by: Luc Besson

* Written by: Luc Besson, Bram Stoker

* Stars: Caleb Landry Jones, Christoph Waltz, Zoe Bleu

* Run Time: 2 Hours, 9 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

This is a big budget production with elaborate costuming, amazing sets, and excellent makeup and special effects. It kept reminding us of 1992’s “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” but even more so. If you’re a fan of Dracula and vampire movies, you really should check this one out. It’s great.

Spoilery Synopsis

It’s 1480 AD, and Vlad and Elisabeta are in love, either that or it’s a teenage slumber party, it looks about the same. Soldiers come to the door and need King Vlad to lead them into battle. He reluctantly gets all armored up and goes with them after getting a blessing from the priest. Vlad makes a deal with the priest to watch over Elisabeta while he’s gone. While he goes off to battle, she’s taken across the country to a safe place, but the party is ambushed.

Vlad rushes to the rescue, but she dies in his arms; he is not happy. He goes home and blames the priest. This goes badly for the priest– very badly. Vlad renounces God and bad things happen.

Four hundred years later, in Paris, Dr. Dumont welcomes the priest to his church. Dumont has a very strange medical case that he needs help with in his mental asylum. He has a woman, Maria, whom he thinks is possessed. She’s got fangs and glowy eyes. She’s a vampire. She’s the first one taken into captivity, but the priest has seen them before. The doctor finds it all a little hard to believe, but it’s obviously true. The church has been looking for the Master for 400 years. She says the Master is coming to Paris to take a princess soon.

We cut to Jonathan Harker, who is visiting Count Dracula’s castle. It’s surprisingly nice inside, and Prince Vlad is looking extremely old– but not monstrous. He has a habit of moving things without using his hands, which Jonathan finds very entertaining thinking it’s magic tricks and not realizing it’s real.

The priest goes to see Henry Spencer, Maria’s husband. He goes through the woman’s bedroom looking for clues, like a detective. She has a page torn out of the book that Jonathan is reading back in the castle; it’s a drawing of Princess Elisabeta.

Meanwhile, in the castle, Jonathan explores the place and finds Dracula’s tomb. He’s attacked by living gargoyles and hung upside down. Vlad explains himself to Jonathan, and we get a flashback to the rest of his origin story. Vlad’s been waiting for Elisabeta to be reincarnated, and it’s been a hard search. He developed a fragrance into a perfume that made all women love him, as well as some of the men from the look of it. There’s a montage of him combining his mind control with the power of the perfume to make rooms full of people in different eras dance to his tune as he searches for her. That didn’t work out so well for him or the entire court of France. He turned them all into servants and sent them out to look for her. Since then, he’s waited in that castle. Jonathan shows Vlad a picture of his own fiance, Mina, and guess who she looks like?

Back in Paris, the priest explains the vampire curse to Dr. Dumont. Dumont’s assistant points out that Mina is in the next room. She’s a friend of Maria, and tells the story of what happened to her. She admits that she’s engaged to Jonathan, but also that she feels like she doesn’t really belong in this time.

Meanwhile Dracula gets a bite of food on the road; he drains an entire convent full of nuns. He then travels to Paris, looking much younger now after feasting, and heads straight to the asylum where Maria is held prisoner. He breaks her out and feeds the orderly to her as a reward for her help. The priest and the doctor rush to warn Mina.

Along the way, Jonathan makes a difficult escape from the castle.

Meanwhile, Maria goes to Mina and says she’s been released from the hospital. They go to a hotel where she meets Dracula. He tags along with them around the carnival like a stalker. It’s all surprisingly romantic, and just maybe it’ll work out for Dracula this time. During their date, she gets repeated flashbacks to her earlier life.

When Mina goes home that evening, she finds Jonathan there along with the priest and doctor. The priest explains the facts about Dracula to Mina. Dracula shows up to convince her about his side of the story and about who she really is. She immediately wants him to bite her, and he does.

The priest, doctor, and Jonathan go to visit Henry, but Maria has gotten to him first. The group works together to kill Maria, but then they have to go to Transylvania, where the count has taken Mina. They bring the whole army with them, cannons and all.

There’s soon an all-out battle between soldiers, gargoyles, and Dracula himself, who’s very efficient at killing soldiers. Soon, it’s just Dracula and the priest, and they talk about motives and philosophy. The priest says Dracula can repent and the curse will end. He needs to let Mina live. There are more troops coming in, and more cannon fire.

Mina’s in danger, so Dracula goes to her. He talks about her being free if he dies, as if he knows what’s coming. He goes back out to the priest and surrenders. The priest stakes Dracula, who, after saying how much he loves Mina, turns to dust.

Brian’s Commentary

What could they have told the Transylvanian army to have them bring cannons to the castle?

There’s a lot of borrowing from “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” (1992), and I mean a lot. Even the music seems to steal from that film. I expected to rag on this for being a ripoff, but well, this is actually really good.

This one has a lot of intentional humor mixed in, which is probably the best thing about it. I didn’t like the CGI gargoyles at first, but they grew on me. The sets and makeup are impressive. The actors, with the exception of Caleb Landry Jones, are all Europeans, and everyone does the proper accents, unlike the earlier film.

This was exceptional, and we’ll certainly be talking about it again in our “Best of the Year” episode in January.

Kevin’s Commentary

I too recognized some elements from 1992’s “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” but this version dials it up to 11. The sets, costumes, and makeup are all very impressive. They don’t shirk at showing the full extent of Dracula’s fighting abilities and powers.

I do wonder how the small band of heroes who go to Romania to strike at Dracula when he and Mina get back to his castle persuaded the military to join them in a multi-troop heavily armed assault. “You see, general, he’s a vampire. No really. He is. And we need your help to take him down.”

Overall, I’d rank it as one of my favorite Dracula movies. Awesome.

2025 Night of the Reaper

* Directed by: Brandon Christensen

* Written by: Brandon Christensen, Ryan Christensen

* Stars: Jessica Clement, Ryan Robbins, Summer H. Howell

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 33 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It’s set in the 1980s so we can have landline phones instead of cell phones and VHS tapes, both necessary for the plot. And they do a good job of capturing the 80s vibe. It hums along with suspense and some mystery for the first 2/3 or so. It’s well made, but we were both very disappointed with the final act.

Spoilery Synopsis

A little boy tells the babysitter about the “Skin Eater” that lives in his closet. As the babysitter leaves them alone, we soon see that this couldn’t be more 80s if it tried, and it’s trying hard at least until the parents open the garage door to come home. No, that’s not them, the door just opened on its own. She goes outside to smoke and finds a dead dog in the street. When she goes inside, she finds a note: “Your pretty.” She assumes it’s the kids, but the strangeness continues. When she finds out it’s not the kids, it’s too late for her. The TV comes on, and a man in a cultist’s hood and skull mask is on there. We also see the same man grab her from behind… Credits roll as the grainy VHS-ish footage continues.

Deena has come back to town and she talks to Chad and Willis. She’s decided on Criminology for her major. Deena goes to see her hyper friend Haddie, but she hasn’t gone to see her parents yet. Haddie babysits for Sheriff Rodney’s kids, and she’s hoping he’ll marry her eventually.

Sheriff Rodney finds a package outside his door that’s got no label on it. Inside, he finds a garage door opener, which upsets him. He and the deputy test the opener on the house where the pre-credit murders happened, and it’s the same one that opened their garage door.

Deena goes home to her parents and talks to them, but her father doesn’t respond to her at all. Haddie calls and says she’s sick, so could Deena do her babysitting gig tonight?

Sheriff Rodney gets a videotape in a box at the office, and it shows a camper being killed by the same guy who did the babysitter. The sheriff says Connor Davis died in the woods two years ago, but it was assumed to be an accident. He and Deputy Butch find Officer Liz on the road burying a dead dog. The two men drive on to where Connor’s body was found years ago. They find another box there. This box has a videotape showing Emily the babysitter’s death. Also in the video is Chad’s van, which shouldn’t be there.

Deena arrives at the sheriff’s house and talks to Max, his son. He shows her all around the house except for the basement, where they never go. Naturally, she wants to go down there and look around. She pays for that with a jump scare. Abby, the sheriff’s wife, died in a car crash not long ago.

The police bring in Chad, who’s a video nerd who always carries his camera with him. They watch the tape on his camera, but it’s nothing. They’ve got nothing connecting him to the murders, so they have to let him go.

Deena gets a call from the sheriff; just checking in. She’s seen someone weird outside, but she’s not too worried. She and Max watch horror movies after that. She hears a dog yelping in pain outside and goes out to investigate. When she finds it dead, she runs back inside.

The sheriff checks out Willis’s house, since he was on Chad’s tape as well. He finds another videotape there, labeled “Night of the Reaper.” Willis walks in, and he arrests him on the spot.

Deena calls Haddie, who has someone ringing her doorbell and can’t talk. Deena walks through the house jumping at every sound. She finds some objects in the house that indicate she’s not there alone anymore.

The sheriff locks himself in his office and watches Willis’s tape. This one shows the murder of the sheriff’s wife, which he thought was an accident. If he was upset before, he’s way over the top now. He points a gun at Willis, who says he was told to give the tape to the sheriff. Before he can get any more answers, the police station gets a 911 call from a girl. All the cops hurry over there. We see that it’s really a distraction at the local drug store.

We watch through the video camera as the Reaper menaces sleeping Max in his bedroom. Then we see Deena use a Taser on the Reaper.

We get a flashback montage that explains what all has been going on tonight. It turns out that everything has been some kind of really elaborate set-up by Deena to capture Liz the forestry agent (whom we’ve only seen twice), who is the real killer [I think. This is really confusing].

Deena and Liz play hide-and-seek in the sheriff’s big house. Outside, Liz finds a whole forest full of masked figures that look like the Reaper. Deena uses the distraction to shoot Liz in the leg. “You murdered my sister. You destroyed my family!” shouts Deena. She was Emily’s sister. Just then, Chad shows up and knocks out Deena– he really was involved in all this!

Deena wakes up and admits that she followed Liz after Emily’s funeral. For a motive, Liz says, “Why not?” Liz and Chad explain it all, more or less. Suddenly, Chad’s head explodes when he keys up a walkie talkie that Deena had already rigged up.

Liz forces Deena to watch her sister’s death on the videotape. Liz stabs Deena in the leg in the same way she did Emily. Suddenly, the sheriff shows up and shoots Liz. Liz tries to make excuses, but the sheriff doesn’t believe them and shoots her again. Deena admits she sent the tapes to the sheriff to set all this up.

The sheriff promises to hide the body.

Brian’s Commentary

So many horror films are starting to do the 80s retro thing that it’s beginning to get tiring. This one needs it for the videotapes and lack of cell phones.

Whatever the Hell happened at the 70-minute mark was the most incredibly confusing “twist” I’ve ever seen. I was lost for a good ten minutes until they explained everything. Even then, it didn’t make much sense. When did Deena have time to do all this? Why was she running all over the house being afraid? Why did they hide Liz’s body, when there was plenty of evidence against her?

This was really good for the first hour, and then it went straight to garbageville with the final third. This is really dumb.

Kevin’s Commentary

When Liz was revealed to be the killer and Deena set this night up to capture and punish her, I said, “Wut?” It’s a confusing and unexpected twist, but at least it is somewhat explained. But wait, there’s another twist that Chad was teamed up with Liz all this time, and Deena didn’t know about that.

It did take an unexpected turn in the final third, but I can’t say I’m pleased with it. It was too abrupt and contrived.

2018 The Velocipastor

* Directed by: Brendan Steere

* Written by: Brendan Steere

* Stars: Greg Cohan, George Schewnzer, Janice Young

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 15 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

We’re just going to quote IMDB.com for the description because we can’t top that - “After losing his parents, a priest travels to China, where he inherits a mysterious ability that allows him to turn into a dinosaur. At first horrified by this new power, a hooker convinces him to use it to fight crime. And ninjas.” They make the most of a low budget, embracing the silliness and fun. It’s well put together - for what it is - and very entertaining.

Spoilery Synopsis

Pastor Doug Jones gives a sermon at church. He goes outside, where his parents are waiting for him, but suddenly, their car explodes (with completely missing special effects). “Your parents died, Doug, that’s what parents do,” consoles Father Stewart. Doug’s starting to question his faith, so he decides to do some traveling. Credits roll.

Doug goes to China. As he walks through the woods, a Chinese girl runs from a hunter who shoots her with an arrow. The dying woman hands Doug some kind of Claw. “Dragon Warrior” is all she says that we understand. Somehow, Doug gets cut by the claw and everything changes.

Back at Doug’s church, he’s now having nightmares. Stewart doesn’t think much about it. As he staggers outside, he passes Carol, a prostitute, getting yelled at by her pimp.

Night falls, and Doug looks at the full moon. He’s in a lot of pain, but then he roars and his eyes change. He’s in the same park when Carol is working, and kills the man who is robbing her. Except he’s not Doug anymore, he’s a vicious dinosaur.

Doug wakes up in the morning in bed with Carol. She says “Last night was amazing.” He thinks they had sex, but she clears that right up. He had no idea he turned into a dinosaur and ate someone. He doesn’t believe dinosaurs ever even really existed. All she has for him to wear is a skimpy little dress, but she takes him out to see the robber’s body.

He’s upset, but she says this could be a great thing. He could be like a religious superhero, killing all the bad. He runs off, in the mini-dress, to take confessions. The confessor is Carol’s pimp, and he’s not a nice guy. It’s quite a confession, and he admits to bombing Doug’s parents’ car. Doug starts twitching and changes right there in the confessional. The pimp doesn’t live long.

Doug goes back to Carol for advice on what she suggested earlier. He needs rules, but he says it felt good killing the murderer. We cut to an exercise montage as Doug toughens up. Doug-o-saur starts eating bad people, and Doug starts getting closer to Carol.

Meanwhile, a group of Chinese hunters are in town looking for the “Dragon Warrior.” This group also deals in drugs and laughs evilly. Father Stewart spots Doug and Carol together and doesn’t like it.

Doug and Stewart talk about Doug’s changes. Does God really want all these people dead? Doug thinks he does, and his parental-flashback proves it. Father Stewart takes Doug to Altair, a man who– flashback to the Vietnam War, where Stewart, Ali, and the squad talk about the future. We see that Stewart had a girlfriend and everything, but that didn’t work out so well. Anyway, Altair does a ritual for Doug, who gets all dino-y and pulls out Stewart’s eyeball.

Out in the woods, the ninjas catch up with Doug. We get a flashback from one of the ninjas. They close in on Doug, who makes short work of the ninjas.

Doug goes to Carol for help, which leads to a sex montage. In the morning, three more ninjas show up at Carol’s apartment, and they fight together.

The old Chinese master, Wei Chan, has taken Stewart prisoner. He explains that he smuggles drugs for God; the addicts will have nowhere to go but the church. When confronted, Stewart calls Wei Chan an infidel, but is then killed.

Doug knows where Wei Chan is, and he goes there to battle. We see that Wei Chan’s number two man is Sam, Doug’s completely ignored and forgotten brother. Carol beats up most of the ninjas while Doug and Sam go one-on-one.

Carol is hurt, but still manages to give Doug a pep talk before dying. Doug then turns into a dinosaur and tears up all the ninjas.

Suddenly, Wei Chan shoots the dinosaur with an arrow, and Doug turns human. Doug’s still got dinosaur hands, however, and he uses it to rip off the old man’s head.

Doug takes Carol to a surgeon who saves her. Doug quits the church and decides to travel the world fighting evil.

Brian’s Commentary

The special effects, when there are actual special effects, are probably the worst I’ve ever seen, which are hilarious in themselves. The whole thing is clearly intentionally goofy, from the concept right down to the acting and dialogue. The story itself is straightforward and easy to follow, and, although silly, makes perfect sense.

It’s stupidly good.

Kevin’s Commentary

When we saw the car explosion effect, I knew we were in for something special, and I was right. I kept waiting to see what silliness would appear to us next. That beheading scene near the end though, was really hilarious. It’s not a classic of cinema, but it’s a lot of fun, and I really enjoyed it.

1991 Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah

* Directed by: Kazuki Omori, Koji Hashimoto

* Written by: Kazuki Omori

* Stars: Kosuke Toyohara, Anna Nakagawa, Megumi Odaka

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 40 Minutes

* Trailer:

Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone

It starts out with a deep-water submarine discovering the body of King Ghidorah. Then a flying saucer appears in the sky over Japan. Things build from there with time travel back to the 1940s, and the origin of Godzilla, and of course a giant creature battle. It’s a big story this time, and on the silly side, but pretty entertaining overall.

Spoilery Synopsis

It’s 2205 AD, and a submarine searches the ocean floor. They find what looks like a dinosaur head. And then they find another. Yes, they’ve located King Ghidorah, who used to have three heads but now has two. Credits Roll.

In 1992 AD, we see a flying saucer above Japan. It’s a full-on mass UFO sighting. Kenichiro works for the “Super Mystery Magazine” and doesn’t want to write about silly UFO stories. Elsewhere, an old man rants that the dinosaurs will one day return to save us all from disasters. Then he’s arrested. He claims a dinosaur protected him and his squad in WWII. There’s no record of the encounter, no one would have believed him.

Experts discuss the UFO and have no explanation other than it’s from space. Miki, from the previous film, gives a briefing about the previous film. The UFO went straight to the point where Godzilla is buried, so that can’t be good.

Elsewhere, Professor Mazaki has read the story about WWII and believes it. He thinks dinosaurs are still alive today. Kenichiro thinks that the dinosaur from the story was hit by radioactivity in the atomic tests at the end of the war and mutated into Godzilla.

Businessman Shindo was also on the island in WWII, and now he owns Dinosaur World - a museum and tourist attraction. Kenichiro goes to interview him, but Shindo clearly doesn’t want to talk about that. He explains his theory about Godzilla, that he used to be a dinosaur mutated by radiation.

Meanwhile, the UFO has landed, and Japan sends all its tanks to deal with it. Three people “beam down” from the ship, Wilson, Glenchicki, and Emmy admit that they are just holographic projections, while they are physically still in the ship. They say they’re from 2204 and have come back to talk to the Prime Minister. They are here to warn us about a coming catastrophe. Nuclear pollution will destroy Japan, and Godzilla will cause it.

Kenichiro is called to the Prime Minister’s office along with Professor Mazaki. They are shown the book that Kenichiro is going to write in the future. The time travelers plan to go back to 1944 and change what happened. Kenichiro, Mazaki, and Miki will be going along. Emmy and Android M-11 will also be going along. They all discuss time travel. Emmy introduces the modern people to her Dorats, little genetically created pets.

They “do the time warp” and go to 1944 Lagos. The Americans are shelling the island, and there’s soon a land battle. Then, the dinosaur shows up; it’s a T-Rex, and he soon drives off the Americans. Wounded, it stomps off back into the jungle and collapses. The Japanese soldiers apologize to the big monster and ask him for forgiveness.

The time travelers teleport the dinosaur to a place beneath the ocean. Emmy releases her three dorats before leaving, and lies about it to the others. Godzilla is gone from history forever– except now King Ghidorah has taken his place. The dorats were exposed to the radiation that once created Godzilla and they mutated instead. It was created by the future people on purpose.

We see the future people, who can control the three-headed monster. They want to destroy all of Japan except for Tokyo and then rebuild it. Emmy is angry; she was tricked into causing all this.

Ghidorah flies over Kyushu with his three lightning-shooting heads. Emmy drops in on Kenichiro and offers him help. She says they lied about Japan’s fate; Japan became super prosperous and became bigger than any other country; that’s why some people want to destroy it before all that can happen. She makes it clear she’s not on the side of Wilson and Glenchicki.

The modern Japanese have a secret nuclear submarine, and they plan to irradiate that old dinosaur on the ocean floor. Miki, on the other hand, can still sense Godzilla, even though he’s not supposed to exist anymore. Maybe he found some nuclear waste or something.

M-11 is still on the case, and he tries to kidnap the heroes. He succeeds and takes Emmy back to the ship. She later reprograms the robot to assist her.

Meanwhile, Godzilla eats that nuclear sub. Somehow, Godzilla has returned.

Also meanwhile, jet fighters harass King Ghidorah. Godzilla reaches land, and he’s even bigger than he was before– this time, he was made by modern, more efficient nuclear energy. The future men send Ghidorah to kill Godzilla. Shindo says, “Our savior has come back again. He’ll protect us like he did before.”

The battle begins. Godzilla loses the battle pretty clearly, but then Kenichiro, Emma, and M-11 sabotage something on the timeship, and they lose control of their monster. He’s not as smart now, which gives the “new” Godzilla more of a chance. Godzilla uses his heat ray to burn off one of Ghidorah’s heads.

While the monsters fight, M-11, Emmy, and Kenichiro fight to get off the timeship before it can return to the future. They use the teleportation device in the smaller ship to send the main ship right into the middle of the battle. Godzilla takes a moment to kill them all before fatally blasting King Ghidorah.

Godzilla is now in Japan with nothing holding him back. He’s going to attack Tokyo, and it will go like the future people said it would. The human soldiers are no match at all for Godzilla. They wonder if Emmy could go back to the future, revive the dead Ghidorah, and then bring him back to defeat Godzilla again. Emmy and M-11 go back to the future.

In 2204, we see that sub from earlier, and characters we know are aboard. Ghidorah’s heart is still beating… Can they revive him and make him a cyborg? No problem.

Mr. Shindo is in Tokyo, which is being attacked. He finds that all pretty ironic. They come face-to-face out the tower window, and Godzilla remembers him– before blasting him to dust. As he continues to rampage, the sky opens and Ghidorah shows up from the future with a new, robotic third head and heavy armor. Emmy is literally inside him controlling him with a joystick. She blasts Godzilla, and there is another epic battle with lots of collateral damage.

Emmy mentions that Kenichiro is actually one of her ancestors, and she needs to go back to her time. Down at the bottom of the ocean, we see that Godzilla still isn’t dead.

Brian’s Commentary

I like this is maybe the first time that Godzilla really had an origin story that more or less makes sense. At least it starts that way, but with the time travel, it’s a little sketchy. As always, the special effects are slightly improved from the previous film. The character Miki makes another appearance, but she’s the only one.

With time travel, androids, and beams of all kinds, this one is way more sci-fi than most. It’s pretty decent.

Kevin’s Commentary

Once again, there is an especially cool poster.

I want to have a Dorat for a pet.

It was pretty obvious that the time travellers were going to be nefarious, it just took a while to see how that was going to happen. Pretty cool story, if a bit on the silly side. And the science is… a stretch to say the least. But I thought it was entertaining. It’s another good episode in the series.

1973 Santo and the Blue Demon vs. Dracula and the Wolf Man

* Directed by Miguel M. Delgado

* Written by Alfredo Salazar

* Stars Santo, Alejandro Moreno, Aldo Monti

* Run Time: 1 Hour, 30 Minutes

* Trailer:

Synopsis

We begin with a wrestling match between Santo and the White Angel. Santo wins the first fall. The Angel wins the second.

Meanwhile, we cut to a crypt. A man prays to Satan, talking about how there have been seven eclipses since the magician Cristaldi killed Count Dracula and the werewolf. Tonight, the blood of another Cristaldi will spill.

We see Professor Luis Cristaldi with his family; daughter Laura and a granddaughter. They talk about the wrestling match and wonder how it ended. Of course, Santo has won the third fall and the match. As Santo goes back to the dressing room, he’s told that his girlfriend Lina’s uncle has something important to tell him. They go to see Professor Cristaldi.

He has gotten a note saying it’s time for him and his entire family to pay their debt. “The power of the avengers reaches everywhere.” Both Santo and Laura think it’s just a tasteless joke, but the old man thinks otherwise. He reads from a book about Count Dracula making an alliance with the king of the werewolves to dominate humanity. Their ancestor, Eric Cristaldi, found out about the plan and stopped it, killing Dracula and the werewolf with a magic dagger. Dracula swore to return, and all signs point to it happening now. Crisaldi is a scientist, but since there are things that science cannot explain, he believes all this. He even has the dagger. He’s old, so he doesn’t fear for himself, but he is worried about his daughter, granddaughter, and niece. Santo promises to protect them.

Eric, the Satan-worshiper, goes to talk to his gang and while there, grabs a bottle of chloroform. Old Man Cristaldi gets ready for bed and the Satanist jumps out of the closet and abducts him. The man plans to sacrifice the professor to revive the monsters. He hoists Cristaldo above Dracula’s coffin and bleeds him dry in a scene much much like “Dracula Prince of Darkness(https://www.horrorguys.com/dracula-prince-of-darkness-1966-review/) (1968).” The blood reanimates Dracula’s skeleton and soon, Drac’s back, fully dressed in formal attire. The werewolf king, Rufus, also awakens. Their first order of business is to change humans into vampires and werewolves to create an army. They soon have a whole bunch of people chained in the dungeon for conversion.

Cristaldi’s family goes to the police to report him as missing, but they don’t seem too concerned so soon. Elsewhere, the sun has come up, so Dracula has gone to sleep and the werewolf has become human. Eric wakes up Rufus and takes him to an apartment in the city.

Santo can’t defeat the curse alone, so he plans to bring in “A faithful and courageous friend, a formidable ally who can be of great help to us.” We cut to Blue Demon in a wrestling match, and he wins too! Later, Laura is attacked on the road, and a man comes to her rescue– we see that it’s Rufus Rex, and now he plans to seduce her as her hero. “She will fall in love with me, and I will sacrifice her on the next lunar cycle,” he tells Dracula the next night. As planned, she does fall for him.

Dracula goes to the Cristaldi house and goes into the little girl’s bedroom as she sleeps. He spots the dagger that the old man left on the nightstand and backs off in terror. The Blue Demon follows Rufus to a meeting with Eric and listens in on their conversation– except they see him and say things to make Rufus look like a good guy and imply that Eric has Professor Cristaldi as a prisoner. Blue Demon is completely fooled.

Eric then leads the fighters into a trap, but none of them realize that Lina has hidden in the back seat and gone along behind them. Inside, the armed gang pull their guns. The leader of the gang has had run-ins with Santo before, so it’ll look natural if he’s the one to kill the wrestlers. The bad guys are just about to de-mask the heroes when Lina runs a forklift through the wall, giving the men the distraction they need to defeat the mobsters. Rufus and Eric debate over how to proceed with killing the wrestlers.

Laura’s new boyfriend (Rufus) tells Santo that he paid Eric to reveal the location of the missing Professor. He shows them on a map where to go. Blue Demon says it looks like another ambush, but they do see the professor in the window as promised. Zombified Cristaldi and Eric knock out Santo, who is soon rescued by Blue Demon. Elsewhere, it’s a full moon, and the werewolf abducts Laura.

Dracula, on the other hand, only has eyes for Lina. He uses his hypnosis to lure her outside, but Santo finds her before he can bite her. One of the minion-vampires bites their maid. Dracula calls Lina through their psychic link, and Blue Demon follows her out as Santo reads in the library. Dracula then orders Josefina, the maid, to kidnap little Rosita, the granddaughter. Demon is captured. Santo goes outside and finds the gardener, who explains what has transpired while Santos was reading the lore.

Dracula now has Lina and little Rosita right where he wants them. Laura and the old Professor are undead under Dracula’s control. Dracula orders the still-human Eric to deal with Santo and the magic dagger. Eric does manage to knock Santo out and get the dagger, but before he can kill Santos, he decides to demand a fortune from Lina. Turns out that Eric was so evil that the dagger turns on Eric and stabs him all by itself.

Rufus punishes one of his own misbehaving werewolf minions by making him walk across a plank suspended above a bunch of wooden stakes. It ends badly for the minion. Dracula then forces Blue Demon to do the same thing, but Santo arrives in time to help him. Santo and the Blue Demon fight a whole pack of werewolves, as Rosita crosses the plank on her own. Lina takes the girl away, and now it’s time for a “boss fight.”

Rufus Rex fights Blue Demon. Rufus starts to lose, so he wolfs-up and continues the battle as the werewolf. Dracula and the Werewolf close in on Santo, who swings on a rope and kicks them both into the pit of stakes, killing them both. All the minions turn to dust.

Later, back at the house, Santo and the Blue Demon check in on Lina and Rosita, who are fine. The two men have to rest because they both have fights tomorrow.

We then get another wrestling match where the two men tag-team against their rivals in the ring. Guess who wins?

Commentary

The wrestling matches are very obviously done on a set with no real audience or spectators, but we can hear cheering and the announcers talking about the fans, so it’s supposed to be a crowded auditorium. All three matches shown are clearly staged for the film, but they go on for a really long time, as if we are supposed to believe they’re real matches. They go on a bit too long for my taste, especially since you know how they’re going to turn out. This is especially true for the final match at the end, which had no connection to the story and only served to drag the run time out for another ten minutes.

I couldn’t help but notice that Agustin Martinez Solares, who plays Rufus Rex, bears a striking resemblance to Paul Naschy from that other series of Spanish-language werewolf films that were popular around the same time. Still, those other films are from Spain, and this was clearly Mexican, so it may or may not have been a coincidence.

It still has luchadores in full-head masks as the heroes, but this is a much more entertaining film than the previous one (“Santo and the Blue Demon Vs. The Monsters.”) The creature effects and masks are better than before, and this time, the monsters actually have plans and powers, and are not just an ugly bunch of fighters. Dracula uses his hypnosis, turns into a bat, and other things, while the werewolf does werewolf things. The plot makes sense, and most of the characters act within the context of the situation.

The cinematography, soundtrack, and pacing are all quite good for a low-ish budget Mexican film. To me, it gave off a lot of the same vibes as the 1960’s Batman series, which, I suspect, is what they were going for. I mean, it’s still ridiculous and campy, but that’s not a bug, it’s a feature.

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