This week, we’re breaking down one of my favorite scientific frameworks: The Hot Girl Mission. Think field research, meets girl math, meets chaos theory.

I walk you through a real-life experiment my friends and I accidentally ran this weekend involving a group of unnamed professional athletes, an abandoned primary hypothesis, and one extremely unexpected plot twist. We’re talking controlled variables (confidence), dependent variables (vibes), and the true purpose of a hot girl mission: to have fun, build evidence that you’re That Girl, and stop centering men in your confidence cycle.

It’s science. It’s delusion. It’s empowerment. And yes, Irish car bombs were involved.