Hot Mess Hotline

Joe Topinka, founder of CIO Mentor, shares his experiences learning that leaders don't judge and how to really lead by example through a tough moment in his career. A new CEO came in and he was removed from the executive leadership team. An average leader will let their ego take over. An exceptional leader will take another route.

Listen in this episode for Joe's top lessons, his source of inspiration, and our top insights you can put into practice immediately.

• Your ego overreacts and lies to you.
• Not only step out of the drama triangle, but bring others along with you.
• When a phone call is better than in person or a video call
• Great self coaching question: "Are you who you think you are?"
• Leaders don't judge. They help solve problems.
• Why your team needs rules of engagement and how often to discuss
• Bring a brick, not a cathedral, to your team for new ideas

About Joe Topinka

Joe Topinka is a visionary Chief Information Officer, mentor, author, and speaker with more than 35 years of success in elevating and leading IT organizations to drive meaningful business results. A CIO with success across multiple industries, he creates agile, business-minded IT functions that are viewed as valuable assets to executive teams through a variety of business cycles. He is a passionate mentor who builds loyal, high-performing teams based on accountability, integrity, and consistency. Joe has been awarded CIO of the Year 3 times by 3 separate entities.

As the founder of CIO Mentor, LLC, Joe leverages his expertise and empowering leadership style to guide companies in capturing the power of technology to achieve profit-driven business results. For more than 15 years, he has applied his successful methodology that creates a bridge between business stakeholders and IT organizations, establishing a people-powered platform that aligns teams to compete. He also coaches IT leaders in transforming corporate relationships, leveraging the right technology, and prioritizing investments.

Connect with Joe on LinkedIn.

Learn more about CIO Mentor and Joe's book, IT Business Partnerships: A Field Guide.

We discussed Cy Wakeman's work quite a bit during our conversation. Her books are a must read for any leader sick of drama, change resistance, and entitlement. Check out her company and work, Reality Based Leadership.

Lead Kick Ass Meetings: Complimentary Resource

Meetings are a really expensive use of your time. It only makes sense that they need to be more productive and valuable. Instead of running meetings that could have been an email, lead powerful meetings that have purpose, participation, and problem solving.

Whynde Kuehne, founder and managing director of S2E Transformation Inc., teaches us how to lead through a crisis from her firsthand experience. She was having a normal, fabulous day when she receives a call from the big boss saying her boss was out immediately and she's now in charge of a 100-person team. Gulp.

In a matter of days she came up with a way forward for the entire team. Listen in for these key insights and so much more from our powerful conversation.

• Why a "bridge" is a powerful metaphor for leadership
• Technical, consulting, and thought leadership are different than people leadership
• Acknowledge the different roles you play in people's lives and work
• Leadership is a responsibility to your employees and their families
• Work is an ecosystem, not a place

About Whynde Kuehn

Whynde Kuehn is the Founder and Managing Director of S2E Transformation Inc., helping organizations bridge the gap between strategy and execution. Whynde has extensive experience in enterprise transformation and planning and is a passionate advocate for using business architecture to enable effective strategy execution and business and digital transformation. She was a key business architect in one of the largest business transformations in the world and also led one of the largest business architecture consulting practices. Whynde has worked with an extensive array of organizations around the world to help them improve their strategy execution ability, including Fortune 500 companies, governmental and non-profit organizations, social enterprises, startups, and cross-sector initiatives.

Whynde is a long-time business architecture pioneer, practitioner, educator, community builder, and recognized global thought leader. With a strong track record of creating successful teams that become embedded into their organizations, one of her most recognized competencies is helping clients build their business architecture practices. She is author of the book Strategy to Reality: Making the Impossible Possible for Business Architects, Change Makers and Strategy Execution Leaders, to be released in September 2022. Whynde is also the founder of Biz Arch Mastery, a dedicated online platform that helps professionals master the art and science of business architecture and its practical usage. She is Co-founder, Vice President, and Academic Chair of the Business Architecture Guild®. Whynde is also a Co-Founder and Principal Instructor at Business Architecture Associates, a Senior Consultant with Cutter Consortium, and a Fellow with the Institute for Digital Transformation.

Connect with Whynde on LinkedIn

About Her Companies

S2E Transformation Inc. is a global management consulting practice devoted to connecting strategy to execution at the enterprise level, with a focus on business and digital transformation. Our company name aligns our core strength — transformation — with our namesake — strategy to execution. At the heart of our approach we leverage the power of business architecture, a foundational discipline for enabling end-to-end transformation and organizational agility.

• S2E on LinkedIn
• S2E on Twitter

Biz Arch Mastery is a dedicated online platform offering coaching and resources to simplify business architecture and facilitate its practical usage. It

​Chris Clews, speaker and author, brings us the top leadership lessons from the 80s in this Hot Mess Hotline episode. Combining his marketing leadership experience and love of Gen X culture, he's written a books series, "What 80s Pop Culture Teaches Us About Today’s Workplace." He travels the country sharing what we can all learn from our childhood favorites: movies that play on Saturday afternoon reruns and music originally released on vinyl.

Chris originally got inspiration for this work while at home on a mental health day trying to figure out what he wanted to be when he grew up. As he revisited Gen X childhood favorites and translated them into contemporary leadership lessons, he found how much they resonated with his peers.

From non-skinny jeans (thankyoujesus) to Doc Martens and Stranger Things, nostalgia for the 80s and 90s have made a full comeback in our culture. Listen in for these key insights and much more from our fun conversation.

• There's a danger in nostalgia and there's opportunity in looking to history for lessons to learn from
• Hair metal taught Gen Xers to appreciate the value of differences
• If you have a formula for success, you may be over using it
• Freedom allows for better problem solving skills
• Digital connection takes away our creativity
• The benefits of sitting next to someone while playing video games
• The difference between rulers and leaders
• Encouragement costs you nothing but can be worth everything
• Unearned leadership earns pleasers
• Why the 80s showed us how to believe in the power of nerds
• Problem solvers don't come in a one-size-fits-all package
• Don't wait your turn and don't wait for permission to lead
• Buzzword Bob is nothing but a buzz kill

If you received value from this episode, would you share this link with others?

About Chris Clews

Chris Clews is a speaker and author of the book series "What 80s Pop Culture Teaches Us About Today’s Workplace." Growing up in the 80s and with over 20 years of experience in corporate marketing he knew 2 things very well: 80s pop culture and business. So he combined the two and created “What 80s Pop Culture Teaches Us About Today’s Workplace”.

He’s spoken to a diverse set of organizations and companies including Visa, DHL, University of Florida, UPenn Medicine, WIFS (Women in Insurance and Financial Services), DisruptHR and more. He's a frequent guest on podcasts with topics ranging from workplace culture to 80s pop culture and he has been referenced or interviewed in numerous publications such as Entrepreneur.com and Esquire UK magazine.

A graduate of Elon University in North Carolina, Chris has held marketing leadership positions in a variety of companies ranging from Planet Hollywood to DHL. He’s passionate about animal rescue and donates a portion of the proceeds from his book and speaking engagements to the SPCA International. He lives by the quote from the poet laureate Ferris Bueller, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop to look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.

​David Fischer, chief revenue officer at Gregory & Appel Insurance, has always sought out challenges. As a marine, he learned the ultimate humble leadership style: leaders eat last. He continuously strives to grow himself, the companies he works for, and the people he leads. That hard work is rewarded with increasingly complex challenges to face, however.

He's a wizard when it comes to creating sales systems and structures to catapult a company's success. This problem he shares with us on the Hot Mess Hotline seemed to be a growth opportunity. And it certainly was. But not in the way he thought it would be.

David joined a company that couldn't make payroll the first 2 weeks he was there. His initial step didn't fix it, so he had to ask for help: from his team (but the whole team couldn't know), his vendors, his customers, his banker. Everyone.

There's a new kind of humility that is taught when you're introducing yourself for the first time by telling others how much trouble you're in. Listen in for David's action, tools, and mindset that got the company back into profitability in mere months (after years of decline), how he worked with key stakeholders to make it happen, and why he continued to workout routinely in the process.

• When leaders eat last, you'll probably never know about it.
• When you need help: ask. You'll be surprised at how willing to help others are.
• You can't grow by cutting expenses, but investment needs to look different when cash is low.
• You should ask for what you need, even if you know the answer will be "No."
• You may need to prove yourself longer than you think is needed.
• Learn 2 powerful questions to ask to solve any problem.
• All you can control is your controllables.
• Show your work and communicate your plan for the uncontrollables.
• Negotiate for the long game as a way to strip the emotion out of the situation.
• If you want more responsibility, ask for more challenge.
• You'll never get full transparency because you don't need it to do your job.
• As a leader, you have the right to say, "I'm not going to answer that."
• It's a business continuity issues when people transition.

About David Fischer

Propelling enterprise value through ethical leadership, innovation and action. David's specialty is transforming organizations into market leaders that deliver sustained growth and profitability. Fusing a high-energy sales, business development, change management and operations background with life-long work ethic and leadership built within the US Marine Corps. 

David has ignited multimillion-dollar growth across a range of industries and settings, including startups, Fortune 500, and PE/VC-backed ventures. David is an innovator and natural leader that attracts and develops new business, expands market opportunities and builds trust across the entire business eco-system.

After serving eight years as an officer in the U.S. Marine Corp, David spent twelve years in the high-tech public sector with an emphasis on international sales providing manufacturing software solutions to the Fortune 100. He then moved into the private sector where he led innovative startups from launch to acquisition, including. 

Currently David is the Chief Revenue Officer at Gregory and Appel Insurance were, he leads the organization’s sales development and goto-market strategies.

David earned his degree in Economics and Marketing at University of St. Thomas in St. Paul, Minnesota in 1987.

David has been married to his wife, Shawn, for 33 years, and together they have five children and three grandchildren. In his free time you can catch David enjoying the great outdoors. He is an avid mountain biker, downhill skier and technical mountain climber. A life-long, multi-sport, endurance athlete and racer who is currently training for the

Blair Milo, founding director of the Center for Talent and Opportunity, took on a huge career opportunity, drove innovation, and then confronted a problem she couldn't outwork. One minute into this episode and you'll know how hard Blair works. She went from distinguished naval officer to city mayor before the age of 30.

Like you, she's an ambitious, go-get 'em tiger, high achiever who does. not. shy. away. from hard work.

But hard work doesn't solve all your problems.

Gggggaaaaaasssssspppp. Did I just say that?

Yep. You can't outwork all of your problems. 

Asking for the right kind of help can be the difference between an okay leader and a phenomenal one. Mayor Milo was driving a once-in-a-lifetime transition for her small town. They were all in and there was no going back. Think: this manufacturing plant that's been closed for decades needs a new life in a new century. She had 4 leadership team members' transition out in 6 months' time and she thought they were her ride-or-die gurus all in for the wild ride.

They weren't and they were gone.

It didn't matter if Blair worked 6 hours or 26 hours a day. There's no way she could have fixed this on her own.

Listen in for Blair's "oh boy" moments and her lessons learned from propelling LaPorte, Ind. into the 21st century with her team. The old one and the new one. Here are some my notes and I'd love to see yours in the comments.

• The downside of innovation
• The importance of putting the mission first at every level
• What to do when you're overwhelmed with people problems and why it's not personal
• Why you'll never really be ready for the big challenges
• Always err on trying to see the best in somebody
• When an organization makes a commitment, its people make the commitment too
• How to answer, "What have I gotten myself into to?"
• Hard work won't solve all your problems.
• How to prioritize people, team, and mission
• This problem is not the emergency you think it is
• Prioritize your team's life outside of work
• Your leader can't control as much as you think
• It's not right to put your expectations on your leader.

About Blair Milo

Blair Milo is the founding Director of the Center for Talent and Opportunity, a community resource at the Sagamore Institute focused on closing the wealth gap of the new majority by accelerating entrepreneurship and impact investing.  She previously served as the first Secretary of Career Connections and Talent, a newly created cabinet position by Indiana Governor Eric Holcomb. In this role she launched the 21st Century Talent Regions initiative resulting in 80 Indiana counties forming regions to plan and implement strategies for attracting, developing, and connecting talent. She also helped create the Indiana Talent Network, a “network of networks” which connects stakeholders statewide in sharing best practices for equitable talent policies and strategies.

Blair also served 13 years as a Surface Warfare Officer with the U.S. Navy serving aboard the USS Mason; Destroyer Squadron 50; the Surface Warfare Directorate at the Pentagon; and multiple Navy Reserve commands. She earned a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from Purdue University and a Master of Professional Studies in Legislative Affairs from George Washington University. She serves on the Board of Governors for the Richard G Lugar Excellence in Public Service Series, the Board of Directors for the Mitch Daniels Leadership Foundation, and on the Dean’s Advisory Councils for the Purdue University College of Liberal Arts and the Hamilton Lugar School of Global and International Studies at Indiana University.  Blair is a Fellow of the inaugural class of the Civil Society Fellowship, a partnership of ADL and The Aspen Institute, and a member of the Aspen Global Leadership Netwo

Emil Ekiyor, CEO of Innopower, learned some tough lessons before finding his purpose. He came to America from Nigeria in high school, never having played football. He learned the game and earned his way into the NFL. He put his head down and got to work. Every. Single. Day. Working on his mind and body to always be competing against himself and the league's best with his speed, strength, and endurance.

One day it was just over.

After injury and an unexpected termination, his name was at the bottom of ESPN's screen and he was packing his bags to head home. If you've ever been fired, you know how Emil felt. If you've never been fired, it feels like that time you belly flopped off the diving board, smacking your whole front side and knocking the wind out of your lungs. Then trying to get back up to air as soon as possible.

Our conversation reminded me that we over-romanticize hard work. We forget that an amazing career has hard work, luck, serendipity, tears, setbacks, and maybe, sometimes, success. Hard work might gain us visibility to the right powers that be, but it's not the only thing that takes us to the top.

About Emil Ekiyor

Born in Lagos, Nigeria, Emil Ekiyor left his family (7 sisters and two brothers) in Lagos to pursue educational opportunities in Daytona Beach, Florida, at the age of 15. Emil participated in basketball, soccer, and football in high school and received a full athletic scholarship to attend the University of Central Florida in Orlando, Florida. At the University of Central Florida, Emil was named a captain of the football team. After an outstanding college career, Emil went on to play six years in the NFL with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Atlanta Falcons, and Las Vegas Raiders (formerly Oakland Raiders).

Upon retiring from the NFL, Emil started several businesses in the United States.  He launched several projects in Nigeria as CEO of EnabekSolutions, which works with companies in Sub-Saharan Africa and the United States to expand and take advantage of the rapid growth in Sub-Saharan imports and exports.  He also served as the National Executive Director for the GEO Foundation, a nonprofit organization that partners with local community leaders to start, support, and manage high-quality K-12 charter schools in the country; President of the Indianapolis Chapter of Indiana Black Expo, President of Indy Youth Sports, Indianapolis Prayer Breakfast Leadership Team, and Board of Directors for the Friends of Education, a nonprofit corporation dedicated to improving K-12 education in the state of Minnesota since 1999 and Board of Directors of the NFLPA Former Players Indy Chapter.

Growing up in Nigeria and then coming to the US without family, Emil’s journey offers a unique perspective on the gaps in Black communities in Sub-Saharan Africa and the US. These experiences and the desire to close the wealth and opportunity gaps for African Americans and Africans are the driving force behind the creation of INNOPOWER.

About INNOPOWER

INNOPOWER Indy is a nonprofit community development organization that works with communities and stakeholders to create capacity-building opportunities for underrepresented ecosystems, businesses, and professionals in education, workforce development, and entrepreneurship. Learn more at innopowerindy.com.

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.

Jason Weddle, CEO of Hamilton, has been successful precisely because he's willing to answer the hard questions and have the tough conversations. Even with himself. For this episode of the Hot Mess Hotline, he shares the confusion that existed in the 6 inches between his ears and describes why mental clarity is more important than the business plan at certain times.

His willingness to answer these tough questions and wrestle with himself has led to his success so far. (I mean, "wrestle," figuratively of course. Otherwise that'd be weird.)

Jason is raw and vulnerable and wants you to know what it really takes to advance from manager to director to the C-suite. He reminds us that the grass looks greener until you realize how much manure makes that growth possible.

This succession plan was 5+ years in the making and full of hard work. And no one does this work alone. He describes the power of coaching, which you know if my favorite tool, and reminds us: "The moment it becomes uncomfortable is the moment you will grow or you will want to pull back."

Don't pull back, my friend. Dig into this episode and then find those challengers and cheerleaders to get you to step up your game.

You'll want to listen to the full episode for Jason's wise advice:

• Why you need to embrace your unabashed ambition, the sooner the better
• The 6 inches between your ears can be the hottest of messes
• The deep questions you must answer in your career to get what you want
• Why you need to embrace the awkward and be willing to be challenged
• Why coaching almost always feels weird at the beginning and that's a good thing
• Your drivers may not be what you think they are
• Your ambition might be dangerous to others but you still deserve to have it
• Make sure you allow others to embrace their ambition too

About Jason Weddle

Jason has worked for Hamilton since 2005, starting as a logistics manager and now serving as the chief executive officer. While not one to brag on himself, his biggest fans will tell you that he is one of the most articulate, inspirational leaders they have met. He is naturally positive and has a can-do attitude in an industry where deadlines and client expectations are high. He is consistently creative and innovative. Jason operates from the highest integrity, treats everyone with empathy, and expects them to perform to their highest potential. He leads by example and is a true servant leader. Jason graduated from Indiana University and participated in Northwestern University's Kellogg School of Management's Executive Scholar program.

Hamilton brings over 74 years’ experience crafting successful event marketing solutions for companies throughout North America and around the world. They partner with clients to engage their customers through exhibits, proprietary events + conferences, corporate environments, brand activations, and digital solutions across all industries. Hamilton helps companies tell their stories and bring their brands to life. For more information, visit hamilton-ex.com.

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.

Jeff Ton has risen through the ranks of IT from manager to director to CIO. He's now bringing the wisdom he's learned to current IT leaders through a CIO networking group in Central Indiana. On this episode of the Hot Mess Hotline, he shares how to overcome mistakes at work through a gut-wrenching management and leadership experience.

He faced his 150-person team to explain himself and explain why they saw their names on the chopping block in a slide deck before the time was right.

It was tense. Seriously, my tummy gets flippy and floppy just thinking about how he felt in that moment as I write this.

His story is for you if you're looking for ways to respond better when tensions are high — to get out of your head and take the right kind of action. This episode has so many words of wisdom, including:

• How to overcome mistakes at work by learning the right lessons from oh shit moments
• What "owning up" looks like (it's not as scary as you think it is)
• A process to use when you've got to face the music
• What the true responsibility of leadership is
• When to allow your people to be all up in their feelings
• People need to know the why, even if they don't agree with the decision
• Why you need to have the conversation with those impacted sooner than you think
• If part of your work is too easy, you shouldn't be in that job
• How empathy can be built in the toughest of times
• Why you need to meet people where they are, especially when they tune you out after a difficult message
• One question you can ask your team members to find their motivation
• What vulnerability looks like in the C-suite
• What the tightrope is between confidence, calm, and worry
• Giving leaders the benefit of the doubt
• Two definitions for API (if you're in IT you need both)
• What not to do when you get sensitive info

Jeff Ton is a sought-after speaker, author and thought leader, having led powerful teams and built successful Information Technology departments for over 30 years.  As a speaker, author, advisor, and coach, Jeff’s mission is to change the face of IT. Saying, “Businesses today are demanding more from their technology and their technology leaders.”

In more than three decades, Jeff has served as Chief Information Officer with Goodwill Industries of Central Indiana and Lauth Property Group, as well as 14 years in various technology roles with Thomson Multimedia (RCA).  Later in his career, Jeff “moved to the other side of the desk” by joining the executive team at InterVision Systems.  After helping to guide several acquisition integrations, he left to devote his energies to his mission.

Speaking to audiences from 5 to 1,000, Jeff has mastered the art of simplifying complex IT issues and is always looking for opportunities to drive value in organizations now and in the future.

He serves on numerous boards and advisory councils including Forbes Technology Council, Hoosier Environmental Council board of directors Connected World Magazine Board of Advisors, and the Mud Creek Conservancy board of directors. He is also a Fellow Alumni for the Institute of Digital Transformation.

Jeff is the author of Amplify Your Value (2018) and Amplify Your Job Search (2020) and is a frequent keynote speaker on topics related to the evolving IT landscape and the changing role of the CIO.

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.

This episode is a replay of an IT panel that Stefanie Krievins moderated in April 2021 with successful IT leaders who also have remarkably diverse perspectives of this world and in their companies.

Diversity is strength. Strength is resilience.

IT leaders and consultants will be responsible for ever-increasing results because of the rate of change during the pandemic: our adoption of technology advanced 10 years in just 10 months.

Also those companies who can't attract, retain, and develop candidates with minority identities stand to lose out, BIG TIME. Listen in for compelling business research that demonstrates the link between profit and diversity in the C-suite.

This episode is for any leader who wants to take the lessons learned from 2020 and re-think how to approach diversity in IT or re-think the future of work at your company.

About the Hosts

This All-IT Community Panel was co-hosted by Indy's premier IT leadership associations.

• IT Leader Indianapolis
• CIO Network
• Women + Hi-Tech
• SIM Indianapolis

About the Panelists

The panelists are Indy's IT trusted advisors and rising stars.

• Tonya T'ere Webb-Wallace
• Mike Gill
• Angel Henry
• Jay Stanley
• Elliott Patrick

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.

Leslie Murphy is the owner of an association management firm with tenured experience in managing people, teams, volunteers, and herself.

She shares her stories about learning more about herself and how to navigate and negotiate change with others.

Leslie shares how her lack of emotional intelligence earlier in her career didn't taken into account others' perspectives or needs. And a few interactions where others were willing to teach her some painful lessons.

Now she knows herself well and knows how to work around her driven, check-the-box mindset to navigate tricky stakeholder relationships and get more out of entire groups.

Because she leads many trade associations, she also has some secrets to share on how to get ahead in your industry too.

About Leslie Murphy:

Leslie has been a leader in association management for more than 35 years, contributing to a variety of associations from professional, educational and philanthropic groups to an emerging trade association.

Bringing her wide skill-set of strategic planning, visionary management, and increasing member value to the organizations she serves, Leslie has a proven record for revitalizing associations and their Boards.

About Raybourn Group International:

Raybourn Group International is an accredited, award winning association management, consulting and event planning firm. Founded in 1988, RGI specializes in helping nonprofit professional societies, trade associations and other membership-based organizations thrive, not just survive.

RGI serves local, state, regional, national and international organizations that total 60,000+ members in 107 countries. In 2021, RGI was named a Best Places to Work in Indiana, demonstrating our company’s exceptional culture and the commitment of our team to ongoing professional excellence.

Get these episodes and more straight-talk advice delivered directly to your inbox at https://stefaniekrievins.com/blog/.