The Jackson Howell Podcast

How A Mission Turned Doubt Into Conviction


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The hardest part of a mission isn’t always the heat, the long days, or the doors that never open. Sometimes it’s the quiet moment in an airport when you realize you’re about to leave a life that changed you, and you’re scared of slipping back into the old version of yourself. Spencer Hutcheson just returned from serving as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Tucson, Arizona, and he joins me while the experience is still fresh, honest, and emotionally real.  

We talk through the chaos of getting home, the reunion with family, and the line that has stayed with me ever since: “I don’t want to go back to my nets.” From there, we get into what that means for returned missionaries and for anyone trying to live as a disciple of Jesus Christ when life gets busy. Spencer opens up about starting his mission without a strong personal testimony, leaning on his parents’ faith at first, and why he chose to serve anyway because he needed to know for himself.  

We also hit the practical side: work and school after a mission, job shadowing, resisting comparison, and building simple routines that keep spiritual momentum alive like early mornings, scriptures before the phone, prayer morning and night, service, and consistent temple worship. Spencer shares an MTC night he wanted to quit, the prayer that changed everything, and why going “all in” is what brings the deep feeling of accomplishment at the end.  

If you feel nervous about serving, coming home, or helping someone you love who’s struggling, this conversation is for you. 

Subscribe, share this with a friend, and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify with your biggest takeaway.

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The Jackson Howell PodcastBy Jackson Howell

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