How Can I Be a Better Person? Archives - Christian Questions Bible Podcast

21st century Christianity can be confusing. With all of the denominations and interpretations and approaches to Scripture it is hard to fathom they all claim to represent the same thing. So, what is the bottom line? Is being a Christian – a true Christian – a difficult way of life, or is it a privileged way of life? Does following Jesus place demands on you that are unreasonable to the average person? Or does it promise and deliver some kind of abundance that the average person would notice? Does Christianity fundamentally change you? Or does it help you be the best person you think you can be? Is following Jesus an exclusive calling of those who would do the hard work? Or does it work by way of general knowledge and discovery? Let’s see how Jesus describes what following him looks like and what it produces.

As we look at Christian life here in the 21st century, it is easy to notice a significant difference in how it works when compared to 1st century Christianity. Now we have sweeping individuality available in our churches. Now we are encouraged to find a church that suits us, that we are comfortable with. Back then, you became a Christian because you became a believer in Jesus and his sacrifice, and it was all about truth and salvation. Now our Christianity is easily focused on fitting into our comfort zone of service or praise or worship or giving. Back then, Christianity was focused on fitting the varied disciples into the mold of living for Christ. In short, modern Christianity is a far cry from original discipleship.

Does this mean that Christianity, which we will call discipleship, is a hard and unyielding mold we are forced into? Not at all! Make no mistake, there are difficult mountains to climb and challenging changes in character to accomplish. But these formidable tasks should not be allowed to overshadow the magnitude of blessing opportunity and growth that discipleship floods us with.

When Jesus tells all who are weary and heavy laden to come to him for rest, he means it. His promise is to show us how to navigate our world by leaning on him for grace, strength and inspiration. The Bible promises peace, joy and overcoming to those who become Jesus’ disciples. There are Scriptures that promise our highest needs being met and being led through our crises. Who wouldn’t want all that? Still, discipleship is a steep and narrow pathway.

How do we put these two seeming extremes together and make sense of following Christ? Check out our March 22, 2021 podcast, “Does Being a Christian Have to Be Difficult?” for answers. We walk through the hardships of discipleship and match them with its blessings and privileges. What we end up with is a clarity of purpose and a straightforward understanding of the why behind it all. Following Christ is not for the faint of heart, but it is the most blessed decision you can ever make!

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As Christians, we face the potential for deep trouble each and every day. Why? We live in an age of knowledge, choice, technology and accessibility. This would all be thoroughly awesome, except for one thing. These opportunities come with a healthy dose of what I will call an “entitlement of excess.” Because we can, we therefore feel we must. Many of the myriads of things available to us are good and healthy. We can learn to garden, sew and carve wood by watching videos online. We can be part of several social communities without the disadvantage of distance. Amazingly, we can learn about other cultures, appreciate art and music from anywhere, read, absorb and watch to our heart’s content. So, how much is too much? Where should we draw a line, and more importantly, why should we draw lines?

You’d think the question of good things potentially becoming bad would be easy for Christians.  Colossians 3:17 tells us, “Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” This seems so simple –  do whatever you are going do with thankfulness to God and in Jesus’ name, and you are fine.  Keep Jesus in mind and carry on! While there is powerful truth in this, it is far from complete.

What if we are blatantly taking advantage of others and doing it in the name of Jesus? Is that okay? Of course not! What if we are supporting an organization we know does bad things but supports what we think are good and godly causes? Is that okay? Still no, but perhaps this is not as easy to determine. What if we are engaged in good and healthy human activities that directly or indirectly interfere with our Christianity? Is that okay? Hmmm, we may need to think about this. How much do they interfere? Is it really interference or is it just minor inconvenience?

The “Is it really that bad?” question is a life-altering query.  How are we making Christian decisions, assessing the countless ways we can occupy our time? How do we clearly quantify when something that starts out worth our time and effort but ends up being an unprofitable path to continue on? To adequately answer these questions, we obviously need the Bible. More than that, we need the relevant Scriptures put in order so we can follow their guidance.

Check out our March 1, 2021 podcast, “Can Good Things Ever be Bad?” for more. We put the complex process of finding godly guidelines for all aspects of life into a Decision Tree. We pose the important questions and attach Scriptures to them as guidance. Then we put the several levels of questions needed to secure a God-honoring answer in sequence. The result is a roadmap to guide us with every life decision regarding things like friends, leisure, research, curiosity and hobbies. We can choose if the good things in our lives remain good. Join us and find out how!

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Christianity at work…for the most part, we all need to support ourselves. That self-supporting system generally comes in three phases. First is the education phase, where we are supposed to choose what self-support direction to take and then how to do it. Second is the work of making ends meet, which for most of us, occupies the majority of our adult lives. It is our thinking and actions in this phase that define our lives. Third is the benefits stage. It is hard to get to but can give us choices and control of our time. Whatever stage of life we might be in, we as Christians are always required to carry our beliefs and principles with us. The question then is simple. How well are we defining ourselves by our thoughts, words and actions while in these environments? Do we look like and act like the follower of Christ we profess to be?

Let’s face it…your workplace can provide a great environment in which to labor but can also easily be a toxic environment.  Either way, we as Christians need to be clear on what we are trying to accomplish when we are there.  Now this sounds odd – obviously we are there to “do our job” and “get paid” and “provide for our family.”  It would be easy if the whole working experience was as antiseptic as that, but we all know it is not.  There are the people factors that add several dimensions to our presence there, and these are what will likely make or break our Christianity in that environment.  So, let’s be clear on what we are looking to accomplish with our Christianity at work.

Jesus worked.  He didn’t punch a clock or get paid a salary, but his daily mission was to teach the Gospel and bring it to the average person.  Looking at his attitude and preparation for his work we can certainly learn some valuable lessons to apply to our preparation and attitude regarding our work.

Here is just one of the many “work day” lessons Jesus taught us.  Attitude: not the attitude we adopt once we get to work and things go wrong or deadlines overwhelm or people are arguing.  Jesus taught us to set our attitude BEFORE we go anywhere or do anything.  His approach was simple – love God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength AND love your neighbor as yourself!  Translating this into our 21st century work environment is simple.  Decide to work as though God Himself were your boss and treat everyone in that environment with the highest respect.  Decide this before you get there and act on what you decided!  Christianity at work!

We all know that there are a myriad of details and circumstances that will hinder this simplistic approach.  That is why you need to check out our July 23, 2018 podcast, “What Happens to My Christianity when I go to Work?”  We talk about working hard when others don’t, coping with dishonesty, managing gossip and so much more.  Jesus really did show us how to truly be Christian while we work – tune in and learn from what he had to say!

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Life has really changed.  With all of the amazing connectedness we have through social media, we are more alone than ever.  We see people via Facetime but we cannot touch them.  We “chat” without talking.  We “like” without truly feeling emotion, we “follow” without knowing where we are going and we “join” without ever going anywhere.  As a result of all of this non-active activity, when someone crosses us in any of these virtual environments we can snap back at them in so many ways with without having to actually face them.  We tweet, post, Instagram, email, text – all with anonymity.  Funny, Jesus specifically taught us to “turn the other cheek” – not to virtually smack them upside their head!  What does turning the other cheek even mean and how do we apply it in both our real and virtual worlds?  Is this teaching of Jesus still as relevant and powerful as it was centuries ago?

Before we even get to the relevance of “turning the other cheek” we need to clearly understand its meaning, as there are many who say it is metaphorical and others who say it is strictly literal.  One key factor in understanding what Jesus was saying when he taught us to turn the other cheek is that this statement was not a stand-alone teaching.  It was but one teaching is a long series designed to give his most devoted followers real, practical, life-driven examples of how to follow him in any and all of their experiences.  “Turning the other cheek” followed the Beatitudes – the “Blessed are you if”… Scriptures.  It followed the being the “salt of the earth” and a “light to the world” Scriptures.  It followed many of the “…But I say to you” Scriptures – lessons in living up to a higher standard of the spirit of the Law rather than the letter.

What if it’s not even your fault?  Key point:  To turn the other cheek is just another rung in a ladder of spiritually-minded behavior.  It is a step up – an advanced step up – that helps us to solidify who we are, what is important to us and how we will act as a result.  So, if turning the other cheek is part of an overall process, then it would be logical to conclude that it is not merely a literal statement, but it is in fact a statement of a frame of mind – a statement of a way of life.

All well and good, so now the next question:  Why did Jesus specify that if someone smites you on your right cheek you are to turn the other?  What is there about the right cheek – is it different than the left? Is Jesus saying that if someone smites you on the left cheek you can haul off and hit him back? Check out our February 5, 2018 podcast, “Do We Have to Turn the Other Cheek?” and see what role the right cheek plays and how all of this adds up to a profound lesson in stellar Christian thinking and behavior.

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Everybody complains.  Sometimes, well…actually occasionally, we do it from a positive perspective for the purpose of effecting change and that’s good!  But most of the time we complain because someone or something is irritating us, or putting pressure on us or challenging us or contradicting us. Most of our complaints are not for the purpose of truly solving any issue; rather, they are for the purpose of being heard, of having our position or circumstance or opinion verified.  We complain for attention, for sympathy and to reinforce our ego.  We often use complaining as a tool of destruction against those we oppose.  For the most part, complaining doesn’t sound all that productive.  So, what do we do about it?  How do we stop our complaining or transform it into something good?

We have all either heard or said this very thing at one point or another in our lives…and most likely it had to do with kids.  Whether you were the adult or the kid doesn’t matter – what matters is the exasperation response that complaining can produce.  What if, instead of going down that road of response, we responded to the incessant whining of a child with, “Look, I know this isn’t the way you want it to be and instead of lamenting so boisterously, why don’t you learn to reframe your complaints in a constructive manner and express them to someone who will not get emotionally caught up with you and will instead help you manage the burden that you are carrying!”  I know – that’s ridiculous. But the thing is, it’s true! Can we minimize the role complaining plays in our life?

David, the writer of most of the Psalms, was a complainer – but NOT like the example above.  On the contrary, David perfected the art of complaining to such a degree that we now read many of his complaints and walk away inspired for good!  How is that possible?  Instead of complaining so much that one would lose count, David made his complaints count.  That’s right, David found and taught a formula for constructive complaining.  One of the really cool things about this is when you read current studies about complaining and how to turn the tide towards a positive result, you realize that David, thousands of years ago, did exactly what these experts say we should do now! Very cool!

The good news here (actually, the GREAT news here) is that David’s constructive techniques are not only transferable, they are easy to understand.  This means that we – you and I – can learn how to reframe what we complain about, how we do it and to whom we do it to actually achieve positive results.  This means we can complain, in the right form, place and delivery, so it is a positive exercise to help us to grow and mature!  It sounds weird, so check out our December 11, 2017 podcast, “Does Complaining Ever Help?” and see for yourself.  Complaining may never sound the same to you again!

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Peer pressure. When we say those words we typically think about teenagers, school and bad decisions and those thoughts are accurate. Young people face inordinate amounts of social pressure on a regular basis and its effects can be devastating! Here’s the thing – adults are also subject to peer pressure and its place in our lives and its effect on our lives is far greater than we might anticipate.  So, for the sake of not only our young people but for our own sake as well, what do we do about it? How do we recognize address and deal with the pressures of life that press us into compromised circumstances and bad decisions? Even more importantly, how do we reverse the process and create an environment in which positive, righteous and loving peer pressure is the order of the day?

For me, one of the most startling things about peer pressure is how old and powerful it is. Because we think of peer pressure in the context of teenagers, we get the general feeling that it is a newer concept that has blossomed within the last 40 or 50 years. On the contrary, God warned Israel about falling into the clutches of peer pressure way back in the book of Exodus when He was establishing their national system of law. In Exodus 23, God told them not to follow the masses in doing evil and not to “testify in a dispute so as to turn aside after a multitude in order to pervert justice.” God was emphatically telling His people – both young and old – the dangers of following the crowd and the dangers of participating in anything not based in fair and just thinking or action. If God was so emphatic to the ancient nation of Israel about this challenge, then peer pressure should certainly be firmly within our cautionary sights.

Its power lies in its ability to do two things:

Having laid out some of the disadvantages, let me also state that all peer pressure is not bad. The flip side of being taken down an undesirable road is the ability for it to be exerted by those of principle, integrity, and righteousness. Such pressure is welcome and valuable as it helps us to stand ever more firmly for that which is right. How do we tell the difference and how do we better stand against the pressure of the crowd towards darkness? Check out our October 16, 2017 podcast, “How Do I Overcome Peer Pressure?” and gather up what you need to stand! Try it! No pressure!

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