In Episode 161, we are wrapping up 2024 with our top 13 highlights (plus a bonus clip as our gift to you) from each of our interviews this year. As we step into 2025, we’re showcasing powerful takeaways from our guests, which highlight key principles of leadership that transcend soccer and apply to every area of our lives.

There is even more wisdom packed into the full interviews, so be sure to check them out at howsoccerexplainsleadership.com or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Clips Featured in This Episode:

1. David Irby – “Bringing Hope”
2. Todd Yelton – “Closer to God”
3. Jessica Hain – “Empathy and Soccer IQ”
4. Brock Thompson – “Specificity in Praise”
5. Randy Waldrum – “Get the Buy-In”
6. Lang Wedemeyer – “Some Things Never Change”
7. The NCAA Settlement Show – “Professional Collegiate Athletes”
8. Ali Malaekeh – “Integrity and Kintsugi”
9. Schellas Hyndman – “Lead Without Starting”
10. Ruth Brennan Morrey – “Unstructured Free Play”
11. Lance VanHaitsma – “Reset Button”
12. Lincoln Phillips – “Mirror of Life”
13. Paul Gizzi – “Becoming Lesser”
14. BONUS – David Irby – “Soccer is Life”

Help to Keep HSEL Going!

If this podcast is helping you and others in your life, you can help us continue producing great content by donating to HSEL with a year-end or monthly gift at providenceworld.com.

Want to Grow as a Leader in 2025?

If you’re looking to deepen your leadership and coaching skills beyond the Xs and Os, join our next cohort of Coaching the Bigger Game. Spots are limited, so click here to learn more and sign up.

Get Involved with the Warrior Way!

Check out The Warrior Way and discover how you can get involved in this incredible ministry Paul and Marci Jobson started in Waco, TX. Click here for more information.

We Want to Hear From You!

What are your favorite How Soccer Explains Leadership moments from 2024? Email Phil at [email protected] or share in the HSEL Facebook Group.

We’d also appreciate it if you’d rate and review the show, subscribe to the show, and share it with others who you think would benefit from the incredible guests we have on HSEL.

Thank you for being a part of the HSEL community – here’s to another year of learning, leading, and growing through the beautiful game!     

Resources and Links from this Episode

·                 HSEL Facebook Group

·                 Make a Donation to Keep HSEL Going (Providence World)

·                 Warrior Way Soccer

·                 Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·                 Phil’s email for DISC Training

·                 Veritas: 7 Truths that Lead to a Purposeful Life, Ali Malaekeh

·                 “Redemption Song” (YouTube)

In Episode 160, we are recasting our interview with Peter Greer, President/CEO of HOPE International and former Messiah College footballer, who talked with Paul and Phil about his path from Messiah College to alleviating poverty with Hope International, how he built in accountability to ensure that he puts his family first, why it is so important to be grateful for everything and entitled to nothing, some of the great lessons he learned from his coaches and teammates at Messiah, how he is using those lessons in his collaborative work with Hope, the need for us to be kind to referees (and why it matters), why we need more grace and less judgment in our sports and the rest of the world, team vs. individual, rooting for our rivals, not settling for mediocrity, and much more. Specifically, Peter discusses:

·       His personal story, including how he grew his passion for soccer and leadership, and how he got to be where he is today (4:13)

·       His work with HOPE Int’l and how HOPE is working to alleviate poverty around the world (7:14)

·       His personal why/mission statement and how he is living it out (11:13)

·       Why his wife has Peter’s resignation letter from Hope Int’l and what he is doing to ensure she doesn’t send it (13:45)

·       The Messiah Method and how Peter’s experienced it and lived it out during his college years and beyond (17:47)

·       How he saw the Messiah program building toward the run of National Championships while he was playing there (22:38)

·       How he is using the lessons he learned at Messiah in his work with HOPE Int’l (26:13)

·       How he uses lessons learned from soccer in his collaborative projects around the world (33:01)

·       A couple soccer analogies that Peter uses in his life regularly (37:12)

·       Why we need more grace than judgment in our world – and yes, that includes with referees (40:37)

·       Defining moments in his life and how they impacted his life and leadership (44:55)

·       Some of the great coaches he has played for and a couple whose leadership stick out above the rest, and what he learned from those great coaches (50:17)

·       His thoughts on the current state of US Soccer, and what we can do about it (55:26)

·       How he has used lessons learned from sports in his marriage and parenting (1:01:31)

·       His podcast recommendation (1:03:30)

Resources and Links from this Episode

·       HOPE International Website

·       Rooting for Rivals: How Collaboration and Generosity Increase the Impact of Leaders, Charities, and Churches, by Peter Greer

·       The Messiah Method: The Seven Disciplines of the Winningest College Soccer Program in America, by Michael Zigarelli

·       Uncut Video of the Episode

·       HSEL Facebook Group

·       Warrior Way Soccer

·       Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·       Phil’s email for DISC Training

In Episode 159, we are recasting our conversation with Steven Axtell, Head Coach of Cortland University Men’s Soccer, former Cortland goalkeeper, husband, and father, when we talked about lessons learned from his playing and coaching career, leadership lessons gleaned from his coaches, his thoughts on playing multiple sports, how he is using lessons from the game in his family, why he doesn’t think superior tactics and strategy are a critical part of a successful program, and how his leadership and culture development at Cortland has helped his players and program to flourish. Specifically, Steve discusses:

·      His personal story, how he developed her passion for soccer, leadership, and coaching and how he got to be where he is today (5:00)

·      His thoughts on the benefits and downside of specialization in one sport (9:20)

·      His personal why and life purpose and how he lives it out each day (15:07)

·      Some defining moments in his playing career and what he learned from them (19:31)

·      Key life and leadership lessons he learned from his soccer coaches over the course of his playing career (23:40)

·      His philosophy on leadership and culture, what he taught about it in his presentation at the USC Convention, and why it is important to us (30:00)

·      The importance of self-leadership, and how he is teaching it to his staff and players (36:21)

·      How to successfully nurture healthy culture over time (41:33)

·      How and why he has his players evaluate each other on character qualities (44:19)

·      How he has used lessons learned from the game in his parenting and marriage (47:55)

·      His book and podcast recommendations (56:31)

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Warrior Way Soccer

·      Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·      Phil’s email for DISC Training

·      Anti-Fragile: Things that Gain from Disorder, by Nassim Nicholas Taleh

·      Jocko Podcast

In Episode 158, we are re-casting our conversation with Don Williams, Head of Operations for the Americas for Sports Recruiting USA and former coach at all levels of soccer, who talked with Phil about the #1 tool college coaches use to find recruits, how soccer players can find the “right fit,” the recruiting implications of the small world of college and pro soccer, “punching coaches in the nose” with player emails and videos, and real-world lessons kids can learn through the recruiting process. Specifically, Don discusses:

·      His story and how he developed his passion for soccer, leadership, and his long journey to SRUSA Soccer (3:31)

·      How Don’s work with SRUSA is similar to his work as a coach of soccer teams at all levels (7:19)

·      The need for players to have both raw athleticism and passion for the sport to play at the college level and beyond (13:06)

·      The importance of soccer players finding the “right fit” and how they can do so (18:00)

·      Why creating and knowing your budget is critical in the recruiting process (25:53)

·      Selling yourself and not burying the lead in your videos, emails, and other recruiting communications with prospective colleges (and employers) (34:53)

·      The importance of “punching someone in the nose” in the recruiting process (39:17)

·      How to make videos on a tight budget (42:58)

·      Making the kids put in the work with their videos, emails, and other areas of the recruiting process (45:33)

·      The small world of college and pro soccer, and how it relates to the world outside the game (46:58)

·      The #1 tool that college coaches use to find recruits (51:46)

·      What most coaches are looking for when they recruit at tournaments and showcases (57:08)

·      Showing the colleges (or employer) that you’ve done your homework on them and that you know why you think it’s the right fit for you (1:01:44)

·      Real world lessons kids can learn during the recruiting process (1:05:50)

·      How to grab a coach’s attention in a subject line and email (1:08:56)

·      How Don is using lessons learned in soccer in his life outside the game (1:12:22)

·      Don’s book recommendations

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group – https://www.facebook.com/groups/howsoccerexplainsleadership

·      Don’s Twitter handle -- @Don_K_Williams

·      SRUSA Website -- https://www.sportsrecruitingusa.com

·      How Soccer Explains the World, by Franklin Foer

·      Inside Out Coaching, by Joe Ehrmann

·      10% Happier, by Dan Harris

·      Inside College Soccer Podcast -- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/inside-college-soccer/id1480369430

In Episode 157, we are recasting our interview with Margueritte Aozasa, UCLA Women’s Soccer Head Coach, former Stanford Women’s Soccer Assistant Coach, and former Santa Clara University Defender/Midfielder, who talked with us about her incredible first season at UCLA, during which she became the first coach to win a National Championship in her first year as a head coach, what mission and personal “why” drives her to do what she does, building trust with her team, healthy conflict prevention and resolution, how her and her husband “coach” each other, what she was thinking in the final minutes of the National Championship game, whether college soccer has a place in professional and national team player development, and a whole lot of great leadership nuggets. No doubt you’ll love this fun conversation with an incredible coach!

Specifically, Margueritte discusses:

·      Her personal story, including how she grew her passion for soccer, coaching, and leadership, and how she got to be where she is today (5:40)

·      Her transition from Stanford assistant coach to UCLA head coach, and the lessons we can learn from her journey (9:29)

·      The importance of head coaches mentoring their assistants to flourish in their program and beyond (13:35)

·      Her personal why/mission statement and how she is living it out (18:43)

·      How she leads herself and pours into her players’ leadership development as a head coach (20:49)

·      A couple defining moments in her life and how they impacted her development (24:00)

·      A few coaches that deeply impacted her life, what set them apart, and what life and leadership lessons we can learn from them (30:57)

·      How she keeps a team full of top players content and at their best when they aren’t playing, or even making the travel squad (38:16)

·      How she builds trust between her and her staff and players, and among the players (42:15)

·      How to deal with conflict before it gets out of hand and starts impacting the players and team (45:42)

·      The highs and lows of the current state of soccer in the US (48:35)

·      The place for the college game in the development of players at the professional and national team levels (53:00)

·      What she was actually thinking during the final minute of regulation of the National Championship game last year (it just might surprise you) (1:01:28)

·      How she has used lessons learned from sports in her marriage and other relationships (1:05:50)

·      A couple great book recommendations (1:10:01)

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Margueritte on Twitter - @margaozasa

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Warrior Way Soccer

·      Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·      Phil’s email for DISC Training

·      Net Gains: Inside the Beautiful Game’s Analytics Revolution, by Ryan O’Hanlon

·      Quiet Leadership: Winning Hearts, Minds, and Matches, by Carlo Ancelotti

In Episode 156, we are recasting our episode with David Ricca, NJ Youth Soccer Innovate to Grow Consultant, Founder/President of Just Live Soccer, 9/11 Survivor, Soccer Resilience Ambassador, Member of 2010 World Cup Media & Marketing team, former soccer player, coach, and scout, former MLS Liaison, former CBS Manager, and former Morgan Stanley Financial Advisor, who talked with Phil about how he has used soccer and other tools to overcome the PTSD he has experienced following the traumatic experience he had in Tower Two of the World Trade Center on 9/11, how he is using soccer to help vulnerable children around the world, his innovation work with NJ Youth Soccer, and how we can create environments where our kids can flourish. Specifically, David discusses:

·      His story, his unique background, how he developed his passion for soccer, his work with vulnerable communities, and how he got to where he is today

·      His incredible story of survival in Tower 2 of the World Trade Center on 9/11

·      How he has overcome trauma from his 9/11 experience using soccer and other tools

·      His personal why and how he is living it out

·      His work with NJ Youth Soccer and the Innovate to Grow grant

·      How we can create environments for our children to flourish in our youth soccer programs

·      How he uses the lessons he has learned through soccer in his marriage

·      His recommendations

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      David’s website & LinkedIn profile

·      Just Live Soccer website

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Coaching the Bigger Game information

·      Warrior Way information

·      Phil Darke’s email address

In Episode 155, we are recasting one of our favorite interview of all time, going back to last year when Phil and Paul interviewed Graham Daniels, Ph.D., Director of Cambridge United, Director of Christians in Sport, and former player for Cambridge United and Cardiff City, about the “Pray, Play, Say” discipleship/leadership method, his personal why, his incredible testimony of how he came to his faith in Jesus Christ and how one pivotal moment changed the course of his life forever, the critical importance of a Christian identity in elite football, achieved vs. received identity, Service vs. Survival, humility, and a leader who he respects deeply. Specifically, Graham discusses:

·      His personal story, including how he grew his passion for football, coaching, ministry, and leadership, and how he got to be where he is today

·      An incredible story about how he came to his Christian faith, despite one of the “worst evangelists” of all time

·      His personal why/mission statement and how he is living it out

·      Achieved identity vs. Received identity - Identity formation and his Ph.D. thesis on the necessity of Christian identity in dealing with performance requirements of elite football

·      Three things that provide a framework for ministry in sports

·      Safe to serve, not scared and surviving

·      A defining moment in his life and how it impacted his development

·      A leader that sticks out above the rest to him (A Premier League Manager that may surprise you)

·      How he has used lessons learned from sports in his marriage and parenting

·      His recommendations

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Warrior Way Soccer

·      Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·      Phil’s email for DISC Training

·      Humility, by Andrew Murray

·      Ted Lasso (Apple TV+)

In Episode 154, we are recasting our episode with Dan Abrahams, Sports Psychologist, best-selling author of four books, Founder of the Dan Abrahams Soccer Academy and The Sport Psych Show Podcast, and former pro golfer, who talks with Phil about his sports psychology work, his books, and his podcast, the concepts of “Teamship” and motivational climate, extrinsic vs. intrinsic motivation, pre-failing, self-leadership, his personal why, how we can coach difficult players by asking great questions, and whether we can recreate the pressure of a penalty kick outside of a match. Specifically, Dan discusses:

·      His story, his work with Premier League and other football/soccer teams, his books, his podcast, how he developed his passion for soccer and leadership, and how he got to where he is today (3:31)

·      What excites him about the increase of awareness of the importance of mindset and sports psychology in sports over the past several years (13:53)

·      In which sport the mental game is more important: soccer or golf (20:04)

·      The concept of “Teamship” and why it is important (26:49)

·      The Motivational Climate of a Team, what it is, and what it has to do with a team’s culture and burnout (30:13)

·      Extrinsic vs. Intrinsic Motivation, get-to vs. have-to mentality, and how they are related to short- and long-term performance (43:07)

·      The concept of pre-failing (49:01)

·      Why self-leadership and a leader’s mindset are important (53:13)

·      His personal why and how it is playing out in his life (59:05)

·      “Not” coaching difficult players, but teaching them to coach themselves through questions (1:01:23)

·      How personality styles are related to the sports psychology work (1:05:45)

·      Whether it is possible to recreate the pressure of a penalty kick in a training environment (1:09:31)

·      How he uses lessons learned in soccer in his family relationships (1:14:16)

·      His recommendation, which is very personal to him (1:15:44)

Resources and Links from this Episode

• Dan’s Website
• The Sport Psych Show Podcast
• Uncut Video of the Episode
• HSEL Facebook Group
• Coaching the Bigger Game information
• Warrior Way information
• Phil Darke’s email address
• Soccer Tough: Simple Football Psychology Techniques to Improve Your Game, by Dan Abrahams
• Soccer Tough 2: Advanced Psychology Techniques for Footballers, by Dan Abrahams
• Soccer Brain: The 4C Coaching Model for Developing World Class Player Mindsets and a Winning Football Team, by Dan Abrahams
• Golf Tough: Practice, Prepare, Perform, and Progress, by Dan Abrahams
• The Inner Game of Tennis: The Classic Guide to the Mental Side of Peak Performance, by W. Timothy Gallwey

In Episode 153, we are going way back to the first half of our first season and recasting one of our most impactful and most downloaded interviews. In this conversation, Eric Pfeiffer, Founder and Senior Consultant of MPWR Coaching and Collegiate Soccer Player, talks with Phil about emotional intelligence, dealing with insecurities, self-love, permission to fail, the journey of growth, conflict resolution, and much more. Specifically, he discusses:

·      His story and how his experience playing soccer intersects with other areas of his life and leadership (3:25)

·      Emotional intelligence and why it is critical to success in soccer and leading others in any area of life (7:36)

·      How coaching sports organizations is the same as coaching any other organizations (9:47)

·      Insecurities, how they affect us in soccer and other areas of life, and how we can overcome them in sport and life (14:01)

·      How self-love is different from narcissism and why the distinction is important to understand (19:06)

·      Permission to fail and why it’s necessary to learn how to embrace failure and fail forward (22:21)

·      How insecurities and emotional unintelligence manifest themselves in our lives (and on the soccer pitch) and why overcoming them is essential to flourishing in life (25:19)

·      The journey of growth and phases of development for anything worth doing (30:18)

·      Creating a culture that celebrates healthy failure (33:27)

·      What soccer teaches us about conflict resolution and how we can work through conflict together in a healthy way (42:09)

·      How he uses the lessons he learned from soccer in his marriage and parenting (48:39)

·      His recommendation of a book that impacted his thinking of the intersection of soccer, life, and leadership (53:34)

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Audio with subtitles available on our YouTube channel (video not available due to technical difficulties)

·      MPWR Coaching website

·      Eric Pfeiffer on LinkedIn

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Warrior Way Soccer

·      Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·      Phil’s email for DISC Training

·      Providence World (to financially support HSEL)

·      Das Reboot: How German Football Reinvented Itself and Conquered the World, by Raphael Honigstein

In Episode 152, we are recasting our episode with Keeley Hagen, Colorado State Head Coach, former assistant coach at University of Texas and University of Tennessee, former USWNT, Sky Blue FC, and Atlanta Beat player, 3-time All-American defender at University of Tennessee, and wife, in which she talks with Phil and Paul about what drives her to lead her players with excellence, lessons learned from her playing and coaching career, leadership lessons gleaned from her most influential coach and from her teammates, how she is using lessons from the game in her marriage, how she is using DISC in her coaching at CSU, how she overcame injuries throughout her career, and which Jobson she most fears on the field. Specifically, Keeley discusses:

·      Her personal story, how he developed her passion for soccer, leadership, and coaching and how she got to be where he is today (5:55)

·      What is was like to coach against the legend, Paul Jobson, and who is the most intimidating presence in the Jobson household (9:38)

·      Her personal why and life purpose and how she lives it out each day (12:21)

·      The DISC training Phil did with her CSU team last summer, how she is using it with her team, and why she thinks it is important for coaches to understand it and use it with their teams (14:28)

·      Some defining moments in her playing career and what she learned from them (19:54)

·      How she navigates shying away from adversity and injuries when we know how much our kids learn from overcoming adversity (23:31)

·      What her injuries taught her about life and her identity (26:45)

·      Her message to people going through injury recovery (29:03)

·      Her most influential coach and the life and leadership lessons learned from her (30:10)

·      Her advice to young assistant coaches in the college ranks (34:34)

·      Things she is using as a head coach that she only learned because she was an assistant first (38:17)

·      Players she played with that had the greatest impact on her, and what she learned from them (42:40)

·      How she has used lessons learned from the game in her marriage (45:48)

·      Her book recommendations (49:57)

Resources and Links from this Episode

·      Uncut Video of the Episode

·      HSEL Facebook Group

·      Warrior Way Soccer

·      Coaching the Bigger Game Program

·      Phil’s email for DISC Training

·      Chop Wood, Carry Water: How to Fall in Love with the Process of Becoming Great, by Joshua Medcalf

·      Win in the Dark: Some think you shine under the bright lights, the bright lights only reveal your work in the dark, by Joshua Medcalf and Lucas Jadin