Well, first of all, I feel very ill-equipped to answer this question.    However, I don't think it serves you best for me to pretend that I don't know the limited things that I do believe God has taught me.    So, with that in mind, I'd like to share the general themes of today's episode -humility -the horrific humiliation of the cross  -how that makes us more surrendered followers -the necessity of solitude -the reality of our nothingness which we will only perceive should we stay in solitude long enough -how I wrestle and fight pride and seek humility -- and how I always hope to.    May this draw you closer to who God wants you to be.    Blessings, Belah   Invitation: Would you like help in your marriage? We truly do care and so does God! Have you given up hope of change? God can do the impossible! We invite you to schedule a free Clarity Call with a caring, understanding advisor here at Delight Your Marriage. Click here to schedule. Here is what one man shared about the Clarity Call experience: “Fear and shame tried to stop me from a clarity call.  I had to humble myself to get the help I needed. The advisor was warm and friendly and could empathize with my situation.” Invitation: Would you like help in your marriage? We truly do care and so does God! Have you given up hope of change? God can do the impossible! We invite you to schedule a free Clarity Call with a caring, understanding advisor here at Delight Your Marriage. Click here to schedule.   Here is what one man shared about the Clarity Call experience: “Fear and shame tried to stop me from a clarity call.  I had to humble myself to get the help I needed. The advisor was warm and friendly and could empathize with my situation.”  A quote from a course graduate: “Nothing good ever comes easy, so if you are ready to stop trying to get your marriage and your intimacy to a good place and start TRAINING to get your marriage and your intimacy to a good place…this program is for you.”

347-How to Be Spiritually Mature

Husbands and wives were designed to be different. You want different things in marriage and intimacy on every level (emotional, spiritual, and physical). 

Whether you're a wife or a husband, whether you're suffering or pretty good... and you're looking for Bible-based insights and scriptural practical guidance on how to transform your marriage, you've found the right podcast!

We have "transformation stories" that will inspire hope that putting into practice these principles, by God's grace, can truly change your intimacy completely. 

If you're looking to see how to transform your marriage sign up for a free Clarity Call, we can hear your story and work with you to determine if we are confident we can help you: https://www.delightyourmarriage.com/cc

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A man of God, in ministry, spreading the gospel, and without even realizing it, he had allowed his marriage to slip into a transactional relationship.  After being married for nearly thirty years, Mark saw in himself that he was starting to become more grouchy, their connection waned, and his wife’s physical desire changed as she began to go through menopause. Their four children were “launching well” but would soon be completely out of the house – changing the home dynamic completely.  All of this put a strain on their marriage. They were now in uncharted territory and he knew he needed help. Mark felt he needed to lead as the man, but just didn’t know how. He had been considering the men’s program for about a year and finally decided to move forward. Through the program, we were able to help shed light to remove the things that were straining his marriage - going from transactional to selfless- and give him the tools to connect with his wife, even in the midst of all their changes.  He finally felt he had the tools to be the man his wife needed him to be, so she could fully trust him and be free around him. We are so excited to share Mark’s transformation story and hope that it resonates with you. If there is anything to take away, it is that you are not alone.  If you are a soon-to-be empty nester, if you're navigating your wife’s menopause, if you are finding yourself discontent and you don’t want to be- we would love to help you too. delightyourmarriage.com/cc God bless you!    Love,   Belah and team   PS - Like Mark, if you’d like to find out if the men’s program would be your right next step, go to delightyourmarriage.com/cc for a free Clarity Call. Maybe you’ll be the next success story!  Here’s another recent graduate’s comments: Before the Men’s program: “The emotional disconnection led us to a growing sense of distance.  Physical intimacy had always been a regular part of our relationship, but there always seemed to be something missing… There was also difficulty about sharing vulnerable feelings and emotions for both of us.  It was just a pattern of stuck-ness.  Things might improve for a few weeks or months, but we would inevitably feel stuck again… All in all we were headed into a pretty 'lifeless' future together, that neither of us wanted or were excited about.” After: “I find myself actually wanting to know about my wife.  The listening skills have helped me to express my interest in ways that she can receive and helped me learn how to receive her more fully… I am able to express delight in my wife through compliments more naturally… There has been a bit of fun flirtiness that has never been a part of my relationship with my wife… I am free from most of my sex-related anxiety.  I was constantly worried about when or if we would be physically intimate… I don't think I have ever been more intoxicated by her body, while at the same time I see each opportunity to enjoy her as a fabulous gift.I am so free to express my desire for her in ways that she loves hearing, without pressure or expectation, but with authentic desire for her.”           

431-Menopause Hit Her but He Needed to Lead

Tom felt like his marriage was good, but knew it could be better. His wife was his best friend, but he was craving romance and passion in their marriage.   After stumbling upon Delight Your Marriage through a Google Search and taking our free Marital Health Assessment, he realized that the marriage he thought was “good” was actually only just “okay” and ended up scoring a 5 out of 10 in the Marital Health Assessment (delightyourmarriage.com/health).    He knew it was time for a change, so he signed up, hoping his wife would take the course at some point. Because that’s what needs to happen… right? ;)    Well, Tom found out, like all of our MR Graduates do, that change begins with ourselves.    And as he took the course and began to implement the principles, he in fact, did see a change in his wife!    She became more flirty and playful and the romance and passion that Tom had been wanting finally happened in their marriage after 4 decades!    All because he decided to take the leap, take the Delight Your Marriage course, and truly implement what he learned.   We know that God is in the business of transformation and He LOVES transforming marriages because the impact goes much further than just an individual couple.    Love,    Belah & team   PS -  If you are like Tom and feel like your marriage is pretty good, but also feel like there could be more, we want to invite you to listen to this episode and to take our free Marital Health Assessment (delightyourmarriage.com/health).    PPS - And just the way Tom started, we would love to chat with you on a free Clarity Call! delightyourmarriage.com/cc  

430-Forty Years In, Now Like Newlyweds Again: Tom’s Transformation Story

Have you ever not done something because of fear? Have you ever done something that felt right at the time, but you were riddled with fear and anxiety later?   Have you ever felt you had more potential than you were living into? Welcome to human nature.  But is that what he should do?  Is that living according to our fears or God's will and His way?  I don't think so.  Instead, the Bible says it's impossible to please God without faith. (Heb 11:6) You might wonder:  Is it required to have faith for your marriage to change? YES. Even Jesus could do no mighty miracles in his hometown because of their lack of faith. (Mark 6:6) Does it mean He will most certainly change your marriage and make you not go through suffering because you have faith? Well, we can look at John the Baptist to see that even if you have faith it's not a guarantee that God will pull you out of the hard situation and cause a miracle. However, the woman with the issue of blood had suffered terribly for over a decade.  She could have allowed her heart to grow calloused toward God and assume He doesn't care.  She could have decided things will never change.  She could have resigned herself to a life that would never get better.  But she didn't, she stretched, she pushed through the crowd, she resisted anything that would try to discourage her faith... and by faith, she touched the hem of His garment, believing He could heal her.  And He did.  "Jesus turned and saw her. “Take heart, daughter,” he said, “your faith has healed you.” (Mtt 9:22)  I want to ask you, when...  When will it matter enough?  When will choosing to notice that God is here wanting to restore, redeem, heal matter enough to you?  When will you see Jesus walking by and reach out in faith?  Resist the enemy's... Fear of being judged.    Fear of loss.    Fear of looking silly.    Fear of being perceived a fool.    Fear of change.    Fear of responsibility.    Fear of taking ownership.    Fear of pain.   I invite you to stand up and choose faith.  Stand up in faith. Reach for His garment. Do not be offended by His response but stay, stay, stay in faith as He might want to do a miracle that you (by your fear) are blocking.  Choose the faith of freedom, hope, joy, love, connection, unity, healing...  Live into the potential life He may be inviting you into. Listen in today: Faith or Fear: When Will It Matter Enough to You? Love,   Belah PS - Marital Health Assessment is a free tool to discover where you are currently in your marriage and to give you a vision of what areas you may be missing and need to gain insight. It also provides free episodes that are uniquely selected for your situation. delightyourmarriage.com/health   PPS - If you're ready to transform your marriage through Christ-centered personal growth... we're here for you: delightyourmarriage.com/cc  We'd love to help.    Quote from a recent graduate heading for divorce: “Delight Your Marriage saved my marriage. It has changed the course of all four of my kids lives. There is now peace in our home and friendship between me and my husband. Without this program I do not think we would have gotten here. I was too stubborn and too hurt.    Belah’s teaching were humbling and eye opening to the ways I had repeatedly damaged my husband and the areas I had fallen short as a wife. Both of us have now gone through the program now and I know it was the push we needed to mature and build solid ground for the rest of our marriage.”

429-Faith or Fear: When Will it Matter Enough to You?

We all know that marriage is a blessing from God. And when a marriage spans decades - ten, twenty, thirty years- we often stand in awe and amazement at that accomplishment.   However, there are times when those thirty years privately have been disconnected and painful and becoming empty nesters resulted in feeling like even less than roommates.   But, what if they found a program that changed it all and brought a deeper peace, connection, and unity to their marriage than they’ve had in three decades?   That is Adam’s Transformation Story. From being disconnected and treating her almost as he did one of his “employees” to learning what it truly means to be “safe” for his wife. So connected in fact that they are planning a getaway for their 30th anniversary! When just a few short months ago she felt there was nothing to celebrate!   We are thrilled to share this transformation story with you because it’s a miracle that we give God all glory and honor for what He did in their family.    If any part of it resonates–the disconnect, the want for a change in heart, the desire for results like this one (planning a trip, deeper intimacy, deeper connection)–we encourage you to make a Clarity Call at www.delightyourmarriage.com/cc   We hope this story encourages you, reminds you that God is for you, and that it is truly, truly, never too late to turn and create a new beginning in your marriage.   Love,   Belah   PS - If you have been on the fence about deciding to go through a program we invite you to join in now, because in 2 weeks the pricing model and structure will change as we’re having to cap enrollment.   I hope you can jump in now as we’ll be raising the price in two weeks.   Check out delightyourmarriage.com/cc  to learn more!   PPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate:   Before MR: “Lack of connection, lack of intimacy on each Spiritual, Emotional or Physical. I knew that our physical intimacy was lacking, My wife and I were friendly 'roommates', Physical intimacy was infrequent (3-5x a year) and not passionate. I knew I wanted and needed more, but I wasn't able to identify the lacking Spiritual and Emotional intimacy. I described myself as Helpless but not Hopeless because I had hope but didn't know exactly what was missing and what to do about it….”  After MR: “(The) DYM MR program has drawn me closer to God, my wife, and my daughters. I have seen wonderful growth in my closeness with my wife and we've spent more time truly together in the last couple months than in prior years. We've gone from polite roommates where I had been jealous of my wife's craving of Diet Coke more than she seemed to need or crave me in her life to teenagers who do fun silly things to express our love for one another... My spiritual connections with God and my wife have improved 100 fold!... My wife and I are on an adventure to read the bible within the next year. We're also cooking together 3 nights per week…” Does your marriage currently feel like living with a roommate? We want to help bring the spark back! Visit delightyourmarriage.com/cc to schedule a free Clarity Call with us. We would love to talk to you!    

428- 30 Years Disconnected in Marriage, Now Deeply Connected: Adam's Transformation Story

Have you ever been in a place where a conflict has absolutely consumed you? Whether you're grocery shopping or with friends, that conflict is just circling over and over in your mind. Maybe you find yourself wondering how you even got there in the first place? And even more so, how to get out of that place? Well, author and speaker Donna Jones is here today to talk about just that.  In her new book “Healthy Conflict, Peaceful Life: a Biblical guide to Communicating Thoughts, Feelings, and Opinions with Grace, Truth, and Zero Regret”, Donna walks us through how to handle conflict with love and grace, how to be an Addresser of Conflict, rather than an Avoider or Attacker, how to lead with listening, and so much more.  We were sad to have this episode end because it was such a treasure! We hope this episode blesses you and brings you and your spouse closer together- shoulder to shoulder, against the problem, rather than against each other. We believe God can heal any relationship and He can use you through His wisdom to do just that. Love,  Belah  

347-How to Be Spiritually Mature

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