In this episode of the Becoming You podcast, I welcome Dr. Laura Froyen. With a PhD in Human Development and Family Studies (HDFS), she helps individuals, partners, and co-parents become the parents they are longing to be.

Listen in as we talk all things manifestation and the Law of Attraction!

How did your car accident change your life?

Laura: This experience saved me from living an existence that was unsatisfying and unfulfilling and it helped me step more fully into my purpose.

How did the accident affect your parenting?

Laura: As I reduced my overall stress and gave myself the space and time to get to know my true values and goals and priorities for my family and my children, my thoughts began to align with my values. Instead of allowing my conditioned responses to my children’s pain and shortcomings take over, I let them know that disappointment happens. That’s what conscious parenting is: finding your resonance so that your thoughts and outward actions are in alignment with your deep, inner truth.

I assume you’ve done inner child work on yourself.

Laura: I like the Internal Family Systems modality of therapy. It’s the idea that we all have an inner family that is used to being in charge of things. We also all have a core self that is naturally compassionate and curious and confined. Oftentimes, that core self has been pushed to the side so that other internal family members can run the show. Once we start leading our internal family from that core self—our true self—I’m that wise leader that my inner children sit in a circle around and listen closely to. We need to be that wise inner kindergarten teacher.

If a client tells you that they’ve hit a rough patch and all they and their child seem to do is yell at each other, what would you tell them?

Laura: I would like you to really get curious with yourself around those moments of conflict with your child. Curiosity is our biggest superpower.

So, the internal work of conscious parenting is noticing the narrative, not beating ourselves up for it, and asking ourselves what we’re really afraid of. Then, ask what the kindest, most compassionate part of yourself has to say about that fear.

When clients come to you, how much would you say if the self-work versus external directed work with the child?

Laura: Kids do exactly what they are supposed to be doing in their childhood. It’s always us. The two types of parents that come to me. One is the old-school, mainstream type who rely on time-outs, threats, bribes, etc., in which case my job is mainly to teach them about childhood development and arm them with the knowledge to know how best to respond to how children naturally behave as they age.

What five tips can you give to someone who is beginning their journey towards becoming a more intentional, conscious parent?

Laura:

1) Get support or find a community of like-minded folks who are looking to make changes and view children the way you want to view children.

2) Get clear on what your true goals, values, and priorities are when it comes to raising your kids.

3) Come to terms with the idea that your child is not you, and that they have their own wants, needs, personality, and goals.

4) When things get hard, slow down.

5) Be kind to yourself. If I were a doctor, “be kind” would be my prescription for every family.

Learn more about Dr. Laura Froyen:

Her podcast: https://www.laurafroyen.com/podcast 

Follow her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurafroyenphd/?hl=en 

Her Quantum Attraction masterclass: https://sso.teachable.com/secure/641356/checkout/3067224/quantum-attraction-masterclass