Are you an immigrant going through a divorce? Maybe you are already divorced but emotionally and mentally you are still struggling? When a relationship ends, healing can take time. There are things you can do to get through this difficult adjustment. Get some wisdom and learn the tools to manage stress during separation and divorce. 

SUMMARY:

1. Get a journal. Here are the questions I suggest you ask yourself when analyzing why you feel the way you feel: What am I thinking about this?;  What am I feeling when I am thinking that?;  What do I do when I feel that feeling?
2. The Line of Life:  On a clean piece of paper draw a horizontal line.

• On the left side mark at the beginning of the line write your birthday.
• On the right side at the end of the line write how long you would like to live.
• Mark today, your wedding day and your divorce date. 
• Color the space between these two dates that will represent your marriage. 
• Answer these questions: How many years have you lived before you became a wife or a  husband?; How many years are left after the divorce is final? ; How do you want to spend the remaining years? What do you want to do? Who do you want to become? What are the feelings you would like to experience on a daily basis? 

3.  Examine your thoughts about your spouse. Ask these questions: What do you think of him or her?; How do you feel when you think that?; What do you do when you feel that? How do I want to feel when I see him? ( Keep in mind if you feel anger, you are the one suffering, not him.)  If feeling angry examine: Why are you angry? What did he or she do? What do you think he or she should’ve done instead? What wasn't fair? How did he or she disappoint you? What did you make it mean about yourself? How are you angry at yourself? How are you disappointed in yourself?
4. When ready make a list of all the moments you are grateful for that have happened during your marriage.
5. Write down a list of all of the positive character traits you have developed as a result of the difficulties you faced in your marriage.
6. Answer these questions about divorce itself: What am I making it mean about me?; What am I making it mean about us as a married couple that is about to be divorced?; What am I making it mean about my life overall?; What am I the most afraid of?; What will I do if that happens?
7. Answer these questions about other people: What are you assuming that other people are thinking about you as you are going through a divorce?; How are they judging you?; What do you think?
8. Possible thoughts to think when creating acceptance and compassion towards your spouse: It didn’t work out but he was trying his best. I can be grateful for that.  It’s hard for him too, I don’t have to make it harder by being mean.  We had a lot of great times, I can always be grateful for that.
9. Possible thoughts to think about yourself to create a sense of self acceptance and self compassion as you are going through this: This is hard but I am trying my best. Sometimes I will have a good day and sometimes I won’t, that’s okay. This is a big transition in my life an

To join our Facebook Group "Pogaduchy na Emigracji" click here:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1106767306991881/

SIGN UP FOR FREE COURSE ON HOW TO FEEL GOOD HANGING OUT WITH AMERICANS WHEN YOU ARE THE ONLY IMMIGRANT IN THE GROUP:
https://shorturl.at/chyM2

Need my help?
SCHEDULE A QUICK CALL WITH ME:
https://app.simplymeet.me/lifecoachewelina