Episode 22. In this episode I dive into the topic of support. We will cover why you more than likely need more support, what type of support you need, and how to go about getting that support. We will talk about how having people around versus truly utilizing your support system effectively is very different, and how to make shifts in this area that truly move you forward in a positive direction.

Want to start from the beginning? Check out the Foundational Episodes of the Motivation Made Podcast here!

Introduction: What is this podcast all about?Episode 1: Want to Get & Stay Motivated? A Crash Course on Motivation, Weight Loss, and HealthEpisode 2: How Dieting Steals Our MotivationEpisode 3: How To Get Motivated To Improve Your Health (Motivation 101)Episode 4: How to Transform Health Fears Into Forward Progress

Do You Have Enough Support?

At my previous job, I did pre-surgical psychological evaluations for people looking to have bariatric surgery, or weight loss surgery. I would ask every person about their support system, including asking about people they have for emotional support (e.g., someone they can talk to openly if they are sad, scared, ashamed, etc) as well as logistical support (e.g., who do you have that can help you out as you recover).

I would ask them the simple question, "Do you feel you have enough support?"

Most people would tell me that yes, in fact, they did. Or they might say, "I rely on myself only" or "I don't need that much support."

Other times, they would say they had enough support, but perhaps later if I saw them for another visit, they might admit: "Well, I have people who care about me, but I rarely tell them how I'm truly doing." Or on the flip side, they would share that in fact while they had people in their life that expressed caring for them, these people would also make very food policing and weight biased comments that would ultimately lead the person down a trajectory of body shame.

Shame and Fear of Rejection

Fears of not belonging, fears of failure, and being rejected by others, is a universal struggle. If you have this struggle, it has nothing to do with something being "wrong" with you, and everything to do with you being a human being.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard, "They wont get it," or "I don't want to bother anyone," or "I don't want to be a burden" or "be too negative", I'd be a rich woman.

Here's the thing. When people come to you with pressure that you need to fix their shame, yes it can be a burden. OR, when you endlessly complain about surface level things, or tell someone over and over that you are stressed about hating your body, or various surface level worries or anxieties that actually aren't what's truly bothering you, it can be ineffective and over time can become draining.

But that isn't really what you need support for, and it isn't really what it's about. Underneath all the diet and calorie obsession, or the random worry about minute details, or your unhealthy relationship patterns or other symptom level stuff, is your underlying stuff. Your human being core stuff that we ALL HAVE. Fears of failure. Fears of discomfort and your "negative emotions," fears of not belonging, and your self-doubt.

That's what you need support for. And that's where you relate to other humans. When you share that stuff with the right people who are emotionally mature enough to realize that they don't need to fix it, and that just empathy and understanding is all you need, that's where the magic happens, where you feel supported, and when you can truly start to move through your stuff and thrive.

Wanna Take a Walk with Me?

Have you taken a walk with me yet? Maybe you listen to this podcast on a walk but how about listening to a guided audio all about shifting your motivation from external diet mentality to internal empowered changes and respecting your body. Download my free 10 minute audio, pop your ear buds in,