How do you make the Change to REScue yourSELF from an Abusive person or Toxic situation? You first need to identify and determine that you are in an abusive or dysfunctional and toxic situation or relationship. This usually is not easy to determine if the cycle of abuse is consciously and carefully controlled by the abusive person. Which often is skillfully manipulated consciously (with narcissistic behavioural traits) or unconsciously as a result of a (self-serving personality disorders). However, if you know the stages of the abusive cycle, you may be able to take back some control you were manipulated to give up (especially you self confidence and self-esteem). Which when compromised and diminished, would enable your learnt-helplessness, and explain why you stay in an abusive relationship or situation.