If you're running a team, maintaining your composure is your single most important skill. The slowest heart rate in the room runs the room. I help leaders manage their triggers so they run their teams more effectively. 

Today I want to talk about what to do when you want an employee to change in some way, and you're thinking that they just won't be that into it. How do you "motivate" employees to grow without triggering their resistance? 

If you want people to commit to change, it has to matter to them. The most effective leaders don’t just help their employees set goals—they help them connect those goals to something deeply meaningful. Without this connection, motivation fizzles as soon as life throws a wrench in the works or the next shiny project comes along.

Why Meaning Drives Change

People don’t change just because they “should.” They change because they see the value in it for themselves. When a goal is tied to something personally meaningful, it transforms from an obligation into an opportunity.

Think about an employee struggling with communication. If their manager simply tells them to “speak up more in meetings,” they may view it as a chore. But when they recognize that improving communication will help them become a stronger leader and open doors for career advancement, they’ll be much more motivated to develop that skill — even when practicing feels awkward or scary.

How to Make Change Meaningful

1. Ask Why It Matters – Instead of focusing only on what needs to change, ask, “Why is this important to you?” Keep asking “why” until you uncover a deeper motivation.
2. Connect to Their Values – People are more committed to goals that align with their core values. If someone values creativity, explore with them how a new process might help them be more innovative rather than just more efficient.
3. Link to a Bigger Purpose – Invite people to see how their personal growth could contribute to a larger mission that they care about, whether it’s improving the team, helping customers, or making an impact in their industry.
4. Make It Personal – Tie the change to their aspirations. Instead of saying, “You need to get better at time management,” raise the possibility that, “Improving time management will help you free up more time for the strategic work you enjoy.”
5. Celebrate Progress – Recognizing small wins reinforces the connection between effort and impact, keeping dopamine flowing and motivation high.

The Business Impact of Meaningful Change

When leaders help employees connect change to what truly matters, they see:

• Higher Commitment – People stay engaged because the goal is personally significant.
• Stronger Follow-Through – When change is meaningful, it’s more likely to stick.
• Better Performance – Employees are more motivated when they see the bigger picture.
• Greater Job Satisfaction – Work feels more fulfilling when it aligns with personal values and goals.

The Takeaway

Change isn’t just about setting goals—it’s about making those goals meaningful. When people see the deeper purpose behind their actions, they become more engaged, committed, and successful. As a leader, your role is to help them find that meaning and use it as a driving force for real transformation.

How do you help your team connect their work to what truly matters? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

If you'd like master your mindset and become an unflappable, Trigger-Free Leader, let's talk. Visit HowieJacobson.com to schedule a discovery call.