Many years ago when I was going through divorce, followed by a career change, I had no idea how things were going to work out. The unknown was intimidating to say the least. I was afraid that I might make a wrong decision that would threaten not only my future, but my kids as well. No doubt, it was a dark period for all of us.

Have you ever been in a dark place? Perhaps you’re there right now. Your darkness may be a career loss, an illness, a death of a loved one, or a failed relationship. I understand your fear of the unknown. I was there too. Maybe like me, you realize that remaining stuck in a dark place is not good. The longer you’re in it, the more it can feel permanent. The effect of the darkness can eat away at your soul. You feel like you’re dying on the inside.

Residing in a dark place is not good. You may be at risk for problems like depression, anxiety, dependency on drugs, alcohol, or some other form of impulsive behavior. These things compound the problems you already face. By far, the greatest risk is a loss of self. You can become disconnected to your true self.

I know I was there when I was in my dark place. Fortunately, I did not linger long enough to compound my problems with poor coping strategies. Instead, I found the courage to enter a brighter future by following a different path.

Let me share with you 5 steps into a bright future after a dark past.

Be sure to check out the podcast version by clicking the button above. I go deeper into my process by sharing how my faith played a key role in the 5 steps below.

See your circumstances as a temporary place, not a permanent residence

You have a choice about how you look at your past or present circumstances. Are you planning to live in it? Or, are you going through it? If it is a permanent residence the future may be dim. On the other hand, if you choose to put distance between your past, plan for brighter days ahead.

You don’t have to remain stuck. Consider your past a chapter, not a finished book about your life.

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Pack up the lessons you learned because you will need them for the future

Dark periods in life are difficult. Yet they also offer lessons to learn. I learned a lot about myself when I was going through divorce. It was clear to me that I had to change things about me if I wanted a brighter future. Being a people-pleaser was not as admirable as I thought.

Going through difficult times affords you the opportunity to learn what matters to you. What lessons have your learned in your experience of hardship? Pack these up and take them with you as you move forward to a brighter future.

Muster the courage to leave your past so you can enter your future

Some people stay in a dark place thinking that it will eventually become brighter. Circumstances don’t usually change on their own. You have a decision to make. Is your circumstance a permanent residence or will you choose a new path?

Fear of the unknown is often a deterrent to action. “What if I find I made a wrong decision? How do I know it will work out?” Sound familiar? I can relate too.

One of the things that helped my decision was a statement by Dr. Richard Dobbins, a prominent psychologist.

People change when the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of change.

Pain is an informant. It tells us something is wrong. If the pain of remaining stuck hurts more over time, maybe it’s time to do something about it. Muster your courage to act. Face your fear of the unknown.

Consider the opportunities a bright future holds for you

Dark events are often a prelude to future opportunities.