Here’s how to make getting through hard times less difficult:
1. Stay Positive. “Life is not the way it’s supposed to be, it’s the way it is. The way you cope is what makes the difference.” – Virginia Satir When you stay positive, you’re putting yourself in the best position possible to not only make it through those bad times, but also to become a better person in the process. When life takes a turn for the worst, you can do one of two things: You can remain positive and remind yourself that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel and that you’ll make it through, or you can curl up in the fetal position and become a victim of circumstance. Now I’m not saying you will never have a bad day, or you won’t get a little discouraged, or shed a tear (or two). But I am saying you have to eventually pick up the pieces and start and/or keep moving forward.
2. Learn From the Difficult Times. “Facing difficulties is inevitable, learning from them is optional.” – John Maxwell Learn from what has happened, so you don’t make the same mistake twice. It’s easier getting through a difficult time when you know the chances of it happening again are slim to none.
3. Know What You’re Grateful For. Gratitude means showing appreciation for all the good in your life, instead of focusing on the negative. Get clear about what it is that you’re grateful for. Write out everything in your life you can think of that you’re grateful for having and/or experiencing. The difficult time you’re going through will start to seem less significant when it’s compared to everything that’s going right in your life.
4. Focus on What You Can Control, Not What You Can’t. Some situations are beyond your control and no matter what you do, you can’t change them. You’re setting yourself up for frustration when you focus your time and energy on things you can’t control. You’re also making the situation seem even worse than it actually is, because you’re focusing on the negatives. Instead focus on the things that are within your control because that’s the only way you can make a change that’s actually going to help you. Make a list of the things you can change and put all your focus on those things. Anything that’s not on the list, doesn’t get your attention.
5. Build Up Your Community. Having the right people around you is one of the most important things you can do for yourself when times get tough. You need loving people because a little love always makes the bad days seem a little brighter. You need caring people, because it helps to have someone who cares about your well-being as much as you do. You need honest people, who will look you in the eye and tell you truth. Their honesty may be that one piece of information, you need to get through the tough time. You need people that are available, for when you need to pick up the phone looking for some compassion and/or honesty.
6. Be Kind To Yourself. In order to survive tough times, you have to take care of yourself. It doesn’t matter what you do, just do something that gets your mind and body engaged at a higher level than wallowing in self-pity.
7. Forgive. If someone else is at fault for the bad situation you find yourself in, the natural response is to harbor anger and/or resentment towards that person. What if you forgave that person? What if you accepted what happened, and you no longer held it against them? I’ll tell you what would happen, you would feel better, because now instead of focusing on the negative feelings you have toward that person, you can focus on moving forward. Or maybe the difficult time you’re going through is a direct result of something that you did. If you don’t or can’t forgive yourself, then you get caught up in a web of self-hatred and this definitely won’t help at all.
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