It's episode 172a, and we must get rid of that bitch of an American girl. Vanish! She must vanish! Make her disappear! Understand? Vanish, she must vanish!

Suspiria (1977) is the story of Suzy Bannion, a new student at the prestigious Tanz Dance Academy, Munich who begins to suspect that something is amiss following the brutal murders of several students, all of whom suspected the teachers were witches. But are they really witches? Yes. They are witches.

We talk about Giallo, Argento, looking before you leap and weigh up the pros and cons of appropriate footwear for sneaking about when you're in a universe that is all about style.

All of which leads to one important question: How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure: He's felt very handsome ever since he got those false teeth.

Look out for How to Survive: Suspiria (2018), out later today!

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