Humans in Love ft. Zachary Stockill

Rosie Wilby is a standup comedian, musician, broadcaster, and author based in London.

She’s performed at the Sydney Mardi Gras, The World Famous Comedy Store, BBC Radio 4, and the Glastonbury festival.

Rosie’s brand new project The Breakup Monologues, supported by Arts Council England, has launched as a podcast (recommended by Metro as one of the top 5 love and relationships podcasts) and blog.

Her first book is ‘Is Monogamy Dead? Rethinking Relationships in the early 21st Century.’ From Amazon:

“In early 2013, Rosie found herself at a crossroads with everything she’d ever believed about romantic relationships. When people asked, ‘who’s the love of your life?’ there was no simple answer. Did they mean her former flatmate who she’d experienced the most ecstatic, heady, yet ultimately doomed, fling with? Or did they mean the deep, lasting companionate partnerships that gave her a sense of belonging and family? Surely, most human beings need both. Mixing humour, heartache and science, Is Monogamy Dead? details Rosie’s very personal quest to find out why Western society is clinging to a concept that doesn’t work that well for some of us and is laden with ambiguous assumptions.”

In today’s episode of Humans in Love we talk standup comedy, the new book and podcast, coming out, the importance of community, breakup horror stories, and much more. Hope you dig.

Mentioned in today’s episode:

* Rosie’s first book, Is Monogamy Dead? (Amazon)

* Rosie’s new podcast and blog, the Breakup Monologues

* Rosie’s TEDx talk ‘Is Monogamy Dead?’

* Rosie’s “Science of Sex” show

Connect with Rosie on:

* Her personal website

* Twitter

Please don’t forget:

If you’re enjoying Humans in Love, and you’d like me to continue making new episodes, please be sure to subscribe to the show, and leave a rating and a review on iTunes. (Or your podcast app of choice.)

Thanks for listening.

Dr. Nerdlove is one of the most prominent (and prolific) dating advice bloggers.

And although his advice is often aimed at men, there’s a whole lot on his website with equal relevance to women. His voice is unapologetic, often funny, and aimed at helping men and women sort out the endemic confusion of modern dating.

As a fellow writer and coach, I’m always looking for other writers and thinkers who can lead men to the light. Voices who can help men see the error (and counter-productiveness) of their double standards regarding women and sex. I feel Dr. Nerdlove (aka Harris O’Malley) is particularly relevant, useful, and timely in this area, and that’s how I was originally exposed to his work.

It turns out he’s just as honest, funny, and engaging in conversation as he is on the page. In today’s episode of Humans in Love, Harris and I talk about his newfound side gig as a minister ordaining weddings, his early dating failures, experiences inside the “pickup artist” underground, momentary triumphs, and a subsequent “dark night of the soul,” his rise and redemption, along a whole lot of rock-solid dating and relationship advice for men and women alike.

Mentioned in this episode:

* The brilliant psychotherapist and author Esther Perel

* Lonely modern men

* Neil Strauss’s The Game

Connect with Dr. Nerdlove AKA Harris at:

* His wonderful blog

* Twitter

* YouTube

Please don’t forget:

If you’re enjoying Humans in Love, and you’d like me to continue making new episodes, please be sure to subscribe to the show, and leave a rating and a review on iTunes. (Or your podcast app of choice.)

Thanks for listening.

James Batcho is a philosopher, traveler, author, and professor of film studies.

He’s also a friend of mine.

Jim currently teaches film theory and practice at United International College in Zhuhai, China. He received his PhD in Philosophy, Art, and Critical Thoughts from the European Graduate School in 2015, and over the past decade he’s taught in South Korea, China, and the United States. His new book is Terrence Malick’s Unseeing Cinema: Memory, Time, and Audibility.

I met Jim here in Chiang Mai, Thailand three or four years ago, and we’ve been friends ever since. I liked the way we could geek out about Slavoj Zizek and Fleetwood Mac in the span of five minutes.

In today’s thrilling new instalment of Humans in Love, Jim and I have a kitchen table discussion about storytelling, the art of great filmmaking, why the idea of “guilty pleasures” is bullshit, travel, loneliness, advice to a younger self, and much more.

Mentioned in this episode:

* Jim’s new book, Terrence Malick’s Unseeing Cinema (Amazon)

* “Dunkirk” by Christopher Nolan

* “Pulp Fiction” by Quentin Tarantino

* “The Graduate” by Mike Nichols

* “Blue Velvet” by David Lynch

* “The New World” by Terrence Malick

* “The Tree of Life” by Terrence Malick

* Anthony Bourdain (R.I.P.)

Connect with Jim on:

* His personal website

* Twitter

Please don’t forget:

If you’re enjoying Humans in Love, and you’d like me to continue making new episodes, please be sure to subscribe to the show, and leave a rating and a review on iTunes. (Or your podcast app of choice.)

Thanks for listening.

Carsie Blanton is an American singer-songwriter, blogger, entrepreneur, and all-around funky human being.

(You might remember Carsie from Episode 2–her father, Brad Blanton, talked about her gorgeous song “To Be Known,” and I played it at the end of that episode.)

Her latest album is “So Ferocious,” which features some of the best-written pop songs I’ve heard in a long while. Carsie is also a brave and compelling blogger, writing about topics as diverse as creativity, #metoo, non-monogamy, and much more.

In today’s thrilling new installment of Humans in Love, Carsie and I talk songwriting and the creative process, the state of the music industry, sex and relationships, jealousy, non-monogamy, her open marriage, her father’s influence, plans for the future, life (and death) in the city of New Orleans, and a whole lot more.

This is another one of those episodes I dreamed of long before I started recording interviews for HIL: a mishmash of many of my favourite discussion topics (creativity, music, sex, and relationships) under one podcast roof, with an unpretentious, open, and honest guest.

I really enjoyed this conversation, and I hope you do too.

Mentioned in this episode:

* “To Be Known” by Carsie Blanton

* “Smoke Alarm” by Carsie Blanton

* “Lovin’ Is Easy” by Carsie Blanton

* Carsie’s new card game “The F-ing Truth” (Available now! Buy a copy, and help Carsie get closer to being bought out by Cards Against Humanity)

* Episode 2 of Humans in Love with Carsie’s Dad, Dr. Brad Blanton

* Carsie’s blog

* “Storm Windows” by John Prine

* An interview with Dar Williams from Thad Russell’s wonderful “Unregistered” podcast

* Quincy Jones’ recent barnburner of an interview

* Become a Carsie Patreon!

Connect with Carsie on:

* Her personal website

* Twitter

* Instagram

Please don’t forget:

If you’re enjoying Humans in Love, and you’d like me to continue making new episodes, please be sure to subscribe to the show, and leave a rating and a review on iTunes. (Or your podcast app of choice.)

Thanks for listening.

Great sex in long term relationships doesn’t have to fade away.

Sex in long-term relationships doesn’t have to die–in fact, it can be re-born, over and over, across the decades. We can choose to discover and re-discover our partner sexually, again and again, over the course of a lifetime.

My guest today is one such sexual explorer.

Isabel Losada has worked as an actress, singer, dancer, researcher, tv producer, broadcaster, public speaker, comedian, and author, best known for her bestseller The Battersea Park Road to Enlightenment. But it’s Isabel’s latest book which compelled me to seek her out for an interview.

Sensation: Adventures in Sex, Love, and Laughter is the first-hand account of one woman’s quest to learn everything she can about creating and sustaining sexual pleasure, intimacy, and desire in long-term relationships. Fed up with the tired cultural narrative that tells us that passion, sex, pleasure will inevitably wane as we grow older, in the book Isabel discovered new perspectives, new practices, new modes of sexuality that can help anyone in a long-term relationship restore and revitalize their sex lives.

Sensation is a funny, poignant, provocative read, and if someone is looking for a “gateway drug” into exploring the literature around sex in long-term relationships, and alternative perspectives on sustaining sexual pleasure and desire, this is it.

In today’s episode of Humans in Love Isabel and I discuss how we can all sustain great sex in long-term relationships, the folly of “chasing orgasms,” tantric teachings and the vast sexual spectrum, the challenges of speaking openly and honestly about sex, separating orgasm from ejaculation, our shared admiration of vulvas of all shapes and sizes, and much, much more. Not for the squeamish, this one.

This was one of the most fun, raw, and revealing interviews I’ve ever had the pleasure of conducting. Hope you get as much out of it as I did.

Mentioned in this episode:

* Isabel’s book, Sensation: Adventures in Sex, Love, and Laughter (Amazon)

* The Vulva Gallery (Instagram)

* The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia (Amazon)

Connect with Isabel on:

* Her personal website

* Twitter

* Instagram

Please don’t forget:

If you’re enjoying Humans in Love, and you’d like me to continue making new episodes, please be sure to subscribe to the show, and leave a rating and a review on iTunes. (Or your podcast app of choice.)

Thanks for listening.

Dr. Brad Blanton is a world-renowned American psychotherapist, and the author of the self-help classic Radical Honesty.

Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton is one of the most impactful, occasionally jarring, and important books I’ve read over the past few years.

Dr. Blanton’s central message is that dishonesty, ranging from “white lies” to major omissions, is the cause of most of our psychological problems, and almost all of society’s problems. Brad stresses the incredible liberation of being more honest with yourself and the people around you, resulting in better relationships, a better career, and an all-around happier, more peaceful life.

Brad is an interviewer’s dream

–a man publicly committed to “radical honesty.”

In this podcast Brad and I talk about sex and jealousy, drugs, the humble origins of Radical Honesty, the challenge of co-habiting and intimate relationships (open and otherwise), his involvement in the anti-Vietnam War movement, the lessons he learned working in a mental institution, his run for the Senate as a left-leaning independent in a red state, his many decades working as a psychotherapist, and much more. Brad Blanton was just as much of a straight-shooter, not to mention funny and engaging as I anticipated.

It’s important to stress that “Radical Honesty” is a nuanced philosophy and practice. If you’d like more information about Brad and his work, please sign up for his free mini-course at radicalhonesty.com.

Mentioned in this episode:

* Brad’s masterpiece, Radical Honesty (Amazon)

* Brad’s autobiography, Some New Kind of Trailer Trash (Amazon)

* Brad Blanton’s incredible run for the US Congress (NOT the Senate, as I incorrectly stated at one point in the podcast. Sorry about that)

* Brad’s TEDx talk, “How to get over shit and be happy”

* Brad’s daughter and future Humans in Love guest (wait for Episode 4!), singer-songwriter Carsie Blanton

* Carsie’s new card game, “The F-ing Truth”

* “She Left Me For Jesus” by Hayes Carll

* One of my very favourite podcasts, Tangentially Speaking with Dr. Chris Ryan

You can also connect with Brad Blanton on:

* Twitter

* Instagram

Please don’t forget:

(Part Two) Mark Lewisohn is the author of Tune In, the first volume of his masterful biography of the Beatles.

Tune In has garnered widespread acclaim and landed Mark the Penderlyn Music Book of the Year award.

Tune In has been widely celebrated for its depth and insight, leading most Beatle fans (a notoriously obsessive and fickle bunch), including this podcaster, to call it the best book on the band yet written. Aside from being one of the finest music historians of his generation, Mark Lewisohn is also exceptionally down to earth and frank, which makes him a hell of a conversationalist.

In part two of today’s two-part episode, Mark Lewisohn opens up about working (and occasionally sparring) with Paul and George, family life, writing, researching, interviewing, and the all of the unique challenges and joys associated with such a mammoth (and important) creative project.

And you can listen to Part One here.

Learn more and connect with Mark Lewisohn at:

* His official website, MarkLewisohn.net

* Twitter

Support the show:

If you enjoyed this episode, and you’d like me to make more, please be sure to subscribe to Humans in Love on iTunes and leave a rating and review. Details on how to do just that can be found right here.

Hello fellow music lovers!

Man, it’s been a long time.

A whole lot has happened between the last episode in 2016, and today. And I wanted to speak to you today to fill you in on what happened to Travels in Music, and more importantly share something pretty exciting.

I just launched a brand new podcast.

It’s called Humans in Love, and it’s a venue for smart, relaxed conversations about culture, relationships, and personal development featuring unconventional perspectives. (You might think of it as “self-improvement that doesn’t take itself too seriously.”) Basically, if you liked Travels in Music, I think you’ll like Humans in Love–the format will be similar, my interview style will be similar, the only difference is the range of topics discussed–and, possibly, the level of frankness and honesty in the show.

My first guest will be familiar to TIM listeners: Mark Lewisohn is the world’s leading authority on the greatest rock n’ roll band of all-time, the Beatles. And for Episode 1 of Humans in Love, I sat down with Mark at the British Library in London where we discussed travel, productivity, the creative process, conflicts, working with George and Paul, and much, much more. It’s a two-part episode that I know you’ll love.

To find Humans in Love just search “Humans in Love” in iTunes, Stitcher, Overcast, Google Play, or whatever podcast service you’re using. Or you can visit www.humansinlove.com. Episodes 0 and 1 are available right now!

Thanks for your support, thanks for listening, and I hope you join me for this exciting new project. I’m in it for the long haul, and I’d love to have your company along the way.

Visit the Humans in Love website right here.

And you can connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram @zfstockill.

Here’s to Humans in Love!

Mark Lewisohn is a leading authority on the greatest rock n’ roll band of all time, the Beatles.

He’s the author of Tune In, the first volume of his masterful three (possibly four!) part biography of the Fab Four. Tune In garnered widespread acclaim and landed Mark the Penderlyn Music Book of the Year award.

Tune In has been widely celebrated for its depth and insight, leading most Beatle fans (a notoriously obsessive and fickle bunch), including this podcaster, to call it the best book on the band yet written. Aside from being one of the finest music historians of his generation, Mark Lewisohn is also exceptionally down to earth and frank, which makes him an exceptional conversationalist.

I first came into contact with Mark back in 2013, when I offered him a look at some primary sources I was collecting as part of my Master’s thesis research on the Beatles’ experience in India. Thus began a warm and friendly correspondence, and I eventually interviewed Mark for episode one of my first podcast, Travels in Music. I thought it only appropriate that Mark should be featured as the first interviewee for this new podcast, Humans in Love.

In many ways, this new two-part conversation picks up where my first interview with Mark left off. While our first interview was mainly focused on his famous subjects, today I wanted to get more insight into Mark the human being, as opposed to Mark the Beatles expert.

Speaking at the British Library in London, and later on Skype, in today’s two-part episode, Mark Lewisohn opens up about traveling to India, working (and occasionally sparring) with Paul and George, family life, writing, researching, interviewing, and the all of the unique challenges and joys associated with such a mammoth (and important) creative project.

Listen to Part One at the top of this post, or on iTunes, Stitcher, etc.

And you can listen to Part Two here.

Mentioned in this episode:

* Mark Lewisohn’s wonderful book, The Beatles: All Those Years: Tune In (Amazon)

* Paul Saltzman, who meditated with the Beatles in India in ’68

* My thesis relating to the Beatles’ experience in India, “Who wants tradition in the Beatle generation?”

* Beatles tourism in Liverpool

* Don’t forget to check out the wonderful band who supplies our intro and outro music! You can support Jungle Fire (and buy the HIL theme song ‘Comencemos’) here

Learn more and connect with Mark Lewisohn at:

*

Welcome to Humans in Love!

In today’s inaugural episode, I get into a) what this podcast is all about, b) who I am, c) what happened to my old podcast (RIP Travels in Music), and d) how GD excited I am about this new project.

Mentioned in this episode:

* Jungle Fire, the generous suppliers of the theme music for Humans in Love! Visit their website here, and buy the HIL theme song “Comencemos” here

* My first book, Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy (Amazon)

* Episode 1 of Humans in Love, featuring world-renowned Beatles authority, author Mark Lewisohn

Support the show:

If you enjoyed this episode, and you’d like me to make more, please be sure to subscribe to Humans in Love and leave a rating and review. It’ll take you around thirty seconds, and it would mean a great deal to me.