Jin's Eulogy

Thank you all for coming out and please keep that energy going for our guest speaker, the voice of Sadness from Inside Out, it’s Phyllis Smith!

Phyllis Smith: As the voice of sadness, I can confidently say I am the perfect act for this gig. 

It’s a tragedy to lose such a young comedian at age 85

He was known to hate birthdays, often saying ‘why don’t we celebrate the moms?’  

They’re the ones who put in the work. 

When you were born all you did was scream and cry, birthdays are so stupid

On his deathbed, he revealed to me that his whole ‘I hate birthdays thing’ was a defense mechanism because he was worried no one would wish him.

Even though he shares a birthday with icons such as Chairman Mao.

So to ensure that everyone remembers his day of departure, we’re gonna put the ‘fun’ in funeral. 

Look under your seats, that’s right, goodie bags for everybody. 

Take out the stuff, what do we have? 

That’s right, airline vouchers for everyone plus free tickets to see Soulja Boy live in concert. 

I can see his 12 children panicking.

Yep he used all his savings on the budget for this ‘fun’ - eral. 

He left no will to youuuuuuuu.

Follow Roman Harris:

All the socials: @jin.hao.li