Back home in Rotterdam, they say that the touch of Mother Luck is fickle. But here at Instead Of, we like to sit around the podcasting table, suck on some opals, and make our own luck. Unfortunately for everybody, we're much better at making luck than we are at making food. That's right, it's another classic foodie episode, and we're whipping up some hot streaks in this one: Josh flushes his way to the top, Tapan is desirable to a specific number of strangers, Mike eats a volcano, and in the end, we all lose, but damnit, we lose together.

Pairings: the sexiest potato diamond you've ever seen; an extra-long belly ring; more ingredients