MEEERRRRRYYYY CHRISTMAS!!! This is our biggest episode yet, with the most movie per podcast we've ever attempted! The original recording for this was over two and a half hours, so my Christmas present to you this year was getting this thing under one and a half. You're welcome! We know that what you really wanted to do this Christmas was listen to your favorite three-white-guys-with-a-movie-podcast talk about three movies, so we gave it our all. It released at midnight on Christmas Day; I wanted Santa to have something to listen to in the sleigh as he delivered all those presents. And something for the Grinch to listen to as he scooped up those presents and put them in his own sleigh.

Edited by Aaron.

Find the article we referenced in this episode here.

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Music by Mikhail Smusev (2013) and Zachary Wiberg (2025)

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Remember when we watched Glass and thought it was fun and interesting, and then when we watched Split we thought it retroactively made Glass worse? Well who'da thunk it, watching Unbreakable takes that to a whole new level.

Unbreakable is great, you should watch it.

Also this recording was 2.5 hours long, we got into a whole thing about Game of Thrones and then another whole thing about something else I can't remember. I'm sorry it's so late. There was a lot to edit lol.

Also also Zach is a dork

Edited by Hans.

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Royalty-Free “Benny Hill Theme” Style Alternative Music By: Orion Williams @OrionPlaysMusic

https://toolofgod.com/my-music/royalty-free-benny-hill-theme-style-alternative/

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This week we meditate and reflect on faith, loss, grief, and yes I suppose how silly it is that they save the day with a couple glasses of water and a baseball bat.

Signs is kind of the Joker 2 of M. Night Shyamalan movies if you really think about it. Trust me, the signs are out there.

Link to the excellent Twitter meme that Hans shared

Edited by Zach.

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In which we try desperately to not talk about Trap so much... and fail.

I know we've said that previous movies were the thing that really tells us who Shyamalan is as an auteur, but for real you guys, this is it.

Edited by Aaron.

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While this movie was dull, irritating, and a complete slog to watch, it might just be the most important movie we've watched so far for this project. The key that unlocks the box with the bigger key that unlocks the mysteries of Shyamalan...

Edited by Hans.

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Join us this week for the M Night's world-renowned B-movie schlockfest Attack of the Killer Plants. DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN.

Marvel at the thrilling on-screen action of... Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel wandering aimlessly around Central PA farmlands and getting into awkward relationship disputes.

I will say though.. some of these line reads are truly unmatched and will bounce around my noggin for the rest of my days.

Reddit Fan Theory discussed around 1:03:30.

Edited by Zach.

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M. Night Shyamalan (c. 2010) walked so that M. Night Shyamalan (c. 2024) could run.

*Doing my best Commander Zhao impression, which is not very good..."

"As you know, our last episode had to be divided into two pieces because we had too many opinions. And as you know, Hans still hasn't seen this entire series. We present to you now the second half of our take on this 15 year-old movie which, as you know, sucks."

Edited by Aaron.

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Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Not too terribly long ago, but long enough ago to make us all feel old, the world was convinced that live-action adaptations of beloved children's media were necessary (Wait... that is still the case). Nickelodeon called on M Night Shyamalan to make such an adaptation. But when he needed his talent the most... it vanished!

Yeah, this is gonna be a two-parter. The original recording is over two-and-a-half-hours long. See you next time, Team Avatar!

Edited by Aaron.

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Oops I did it again.

This time instead of rambling off the cuff I sat down and wrote 5 and a half pages on some of my thoughts, because... you know.. I'm a card carrying member of the elite cultural intelligentsia class. Right?

I start off by comparing the 2022 film Barbarian thematically and stylistically to Shyamalan's oeuvre thus far; and then I go on a tangent unpacking some of the gender politics and depictions of masculinity in the film which we all know people are super chill about in the year of our Lord 2025 so buckle up I guess.

I set this one to drop exactly a week later at 2:17 am again even though that reference doesn't even make sense for this movie, but what are ya gonna do?

Edited by Zach.

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Hey all, Zach here.

In a sad attempt to pretend at being like a real movie podcaster/reviewer I went rogue and solo watched a movie and recorded my thoughts on it while it's still in its opening weekend. Aaron and especially Hans weren't that interested in watching this, so sometimes you just gotta roll up your sleeves and take care of business on your own.

But like, I kinda non-specifically relate it to the works of M. Night Shyamalan we have watched thus far, so I have some excuse to drop this in the main feed.

Hopefully this is a fun surprise for all, my co-hosts included. Not sure if most podcast apps display the release time in addition to the release date, so just know that I set this to release at 2:17 am because I'm funny like that.

Strong recommend from me, go watch this one while it's still playing at your local picture house!

#BRINGINGWEAPONSTOTHETHEATER

Edited by Zach.

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