Invincible Career - Claim your power and regain your freedom

My guest for this episode is my good friend Anna Codina from Costa Rica. She is a content strategist with over a decade of experience in the industry and has worked with brands such as Adobe, Evernote, and Wildlife Fund.

Anna’s simple content strategy attracts the top 10% of her client’s best-paying customers and helps busy entrepreneurs create relatable storytelling and purposeful messaging.

She is a former self-taught web developer and co-hosts the Brave New Workforce, a podcast that dives into the future of work. Anna is also a professional hula hooper and has appeared on a number of local TV stations and was a former online radio host for the expat community in Asia. 

Originally from Singapore, Anna lives in Costa Rica and the U.S. She speaks English, Spanish, and basic Cantonese.

Key points from our conversation

I want to call out a few points from my conversation with Anna to help you if you are struggling with attracting employers and recruiters, telling a compelling story about yourself, or feeling powerless about your future.

The power of storytelling

Anna talks about the power of storytelling and how she uses it with her clients. All too often, companies and people create boring content that no one will ever read, listen to, or watch. But, it doesn’t have to be that way.

You can immediately elevate your content using the power of interesting personal stories. Make it relatable and relevant, and you will engage, excite, and energize your audience.

By the way, using compelling storytelling doesn’t only apply to the marketing campaigns of large corporations. Smaller startups, solopreneurs, and even individuals who want to build their personal brands (e.g., so they can stand out and become opportunity magnets) can definitely benefit from using this strategy.

Taking control of your path

Anna shares her career journey from a self-taught web developer at 15 years old to a professional hula hooper to writer and content strategist. She’s certainly one of the most flexible career changers I’ve known.

She’s been running her own businesses since she was a teenager. She learned to constantly adapt to the market demands and overcome the “feast and famine” cycles that consultants and solopreneurs often endure.

What I’ve noticed about Anna is that she is always learning, finding mentors, taking courses, and teaching herself something new. She’s never been tied down with a 9-5 employer who would put her in a box and constrain her ambitions.

Freedom and flexibility

We also discuss the joys and pains of running your own business. You need a lot of self-discipline, and there are certainly risks in self-employment. But, she loves that she essentially gets paid to learn new things. There’s never a dull moment!

She also enjoys the flexibility to work from anywhere in the world. A few weeks ago, she was vacationing in Mexico and could still keep up with her work, record a podcast episode, etc.

The freedom that comes with being an entrepreneur also allows you to explore hobbies and activities outside your professional life. And, guess what that does?

Yep. It gives you even more interesting stories to tell later.

⬆️ Scroll to the top if you want to listen to our full conversation and hear about how you could work with Anna 🎧

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

📣 Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Build Your AudienceThis challenge helps you grow your newsletter audience more quickly. Of course, you could sit back and wait for organic growth through SEO, discovery, and people sharing specific issues on social media. But, that usually takes a long time…

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who also runs a professional and supportive online community for solopreneurs and entrepreneurs (join us!). He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

You don’t always recognize opportunity when it knocks. That’s especially true when you answer the door only to discover that more work is waiting for you.

Many years ago, I was a designer at eBay. During one particularly challenging project, my product manager got called away for jury duty. Unfortunately, there weren’t any other PMs available to take over.

Now, if you’re not familiar with what it is like to work at eBay, you may think that this meant the project would be delayed. We could simply wait until the PM returned from jury duty. 

However, the standard operating procedure at eBay was that you never slipped dates on a project. You might cut scope and features to get a product update out on time. But you never ever pushed out a release date.

The PM’s manager came to me and asked if I could take over as the product manager and keep the project on schedule. So, in addition to the design work for the project, I took over writing the product requirements document (PRD) and working with engineering.

By the way, thank you for believing in me, DJ! Looking back, I consider myself lucky to get that PM experience while I was a designer. 

Little did I know that it would later give me the confidence to throw my hat in the ring for a Product leadership role at Yahoo. I was the VP of Design for Yahoo! Search and Marketplace organization when our VP of Product left the company. 

Rather than waiting to find out who my new partner would be when they hired his replacement, I created a proposal for how I could lead both the Product and Design teams for Search. My boss agreed, and that decision changed my career trajectory forever. It put me on a new path that opened doors for me later.

Reinvention isn’t easy

It is a ton of work to change professions, make a career pivot, and start down a new path. Some people consider it but give up because they can’t stomach the idea of starting their careers over. 

Many fear ending up at the bottom of a new career ladder after they’ve already spent so many years climbing that first ladder. Who would want to do that?

Yes, it can happen that way if you try to abruptly exit one profession and start over again in a completely new profession. But, one of the most effective ways to ease into a career change is to do it from within the company while you still have your job. 

The first question is, how significant will this change of career be? What’s the size of the pivot?

* Big: Changing both industry and profession.

* Medium: Changing profession, but not industry.

* Small: Slight change of profession or industry. 

I would say that my first career pivot was a medium-sized change. I stayed in the same industry and even the same company. But, I changed professions from Design to Product. 

My second career pivot was definitely a big one. I left the tech industry entirely and my past professions as a designer, design leader, and product leader. 

My friends told me that I was crazy. It was such a significant change that I had to start my own business (to work around gatekeepers) and make a large lifestyle change as well. 

Some of my friends have also made rather large career changes and pivoted into entirely different industries and professions. In each case, they felt like they found their calling, were more fulfilled, and become more successful.

* From working in the tech industry to becoming a restaurant owner. 

* From managing a supermarket to becoming a real estate agent. 

* From being a physical therapist to becoming a spine surgeon. 

Other friends have made smaller pivots, which weren’t quite as drastic. Nonetheless, the change made them happier and more successful. 

* From designer to engineer. 

* From engineer to product manager. 

* From product manager to startup founder. 

It is much easier to move into an adjacent profession within the same company with the full support of your manager. I was lucky enough to have that, plus mentors and coaches who educated and advised me. 

If you don’t have that type of opportunity and support, you’ll have to educate yourself on your own time. You’ll have to find ways to earn the credibility that will convince someone to hire you in your new profession.

I’ve never known a hiring manager that was willing to hire someone who had zero working experience in a profession (e.g., a designer who wanted to be hired as a product manager in a new company). So, the burden will fall on you to create the proof that will persuade an employer to give you a chance. Or, you may have to start your own business as I did.

There are three things that you will need to navigate a significant career change successfully:

* Ability

* Support

* Opportunity 

Ability

You may have the potential to pivot into an entirely new career path, but you have to develop the ability. Depending on the profession you’re pursuing, you may also need additional training, education, certifications, licensing, etc. 

“Pivot to something you LOVE. Get the credentials. Make sure you can make $. If dropping $ then adjust lifestyle by the same measures.” — Michelle Caira

For example, my brother started his career as a physical therapist. But, he soon discovered that he wanted to go beyond the care he could provide as one. He decided to go back to school to become an orthopedic surgeon. 

He had the potential. He may even have had some of the knowledge and capabilities. 

However, he sure as heck couldn’t see patients and operate on anyone until he finished med school, completed his residency, passed his license exam, got board-certified, and started working for a hospital. 

In the best case, you can acquire knowledge, learn skills, and get the experience you need in a new profession while you’re on the job working in your old profession. Some companies are great about providing internal training and career mobility within the company. 

“I would suggest people to keep a balance and then take action. You should not leave your full-time job! You should work simultaneously, that's my advice.” — Ankit Panda

However, some companies won’t provide you with the opportunity to prepare for your new career on the job. In the worst case, you’re on your own. You’ll have to find educational resources, training, and mentors outside of work. 

Support

A support system helps considerably when you are changing professions. A supportive manager can secure funds for your internal training, connect you with coaches and mentors, and give you time to learn new skills on the job. 

“Do a self-inventory listing your strengths and weaknesses and develop your team, support group and resources accordingly. No one is the complete package so learn to cultivate those that help to cover your weaker areas and be ready to help in return. Both are truly necessary because it is amazing how often the teacher becomes the student.” — Doug Highland

If you have a significant other, it sure is helpful if they are supportive of a big career change that might impact your income for a while. Change is always a little risky. Failure is always possible. 

Having support from friends and loved ones can give you more courage to move ahead. I’ve been fortunate that my wife has been incredibly supportive of all of my crazy career changes, educational pursuits, and business ventures. She’s made it possible for us to navigate the financial bumps in the road along the way. 

Can you change professions without a support system? Yes, you can do it alone in some cases, especially if you’re making a small to medium pivot in your profession and/or industry. 

However, in some situations, you’re going to have a tough time — maybe an impossible time — making a massive change without support. I would highly recommend looking for a community that can help provide guidance, feedback, support, and networking opportunities. 

“Find your community. Joining a community of like-minded professionals was easily the best decision I made in my new career. Receiving advice, feedback, and expanding my network was invaluable. Also, always ask for feedback.” — Christopher Schutt

Opportunity

You have to learn to recognize opportunities when they present themselves. One way to fine-tune your “opportunity antenna” is to have a long-term career goal in mind and at least a rough plan that maps out how you will get there. 

For example, I knew that I wanted more for my career than to be a Design executive. I had a goal of starting a business or founding my own startup. 

My plan to achieve that goal included getting more product and business experience. So, when I found out that our Head of Product was leaving, I recognized and seized the opportunity to step up, take on that role, and get the experience I needed.

If the right opportunity doesn’t present itself, you’ll have to create your own. Construct the right conditions to set you up for success. 

That means that you may need to look outside of your current employer for a chance to move onto a different path. You may need to start your own business. You may need to save up a financial cushion so that you can quit your job and go all-in on making your new career path work. 

“It's OK to take a step backward in order to move forward on a new path.” — Tracy Ulin

Be Confident!

What has always helped me remain confident during significant career changes is the knowledge that I have succeeded before. I know that I can always fall back on my previous education, skills, and experience to get a job to survive in my old profession if the new gig or business fails. 

“I’d say to remember there’s not as much risk in TRYING something new, in most cases: if you’ve built a career already, you can always fall back on it if the new one doesn’t work out. So rather than be timid and move slowly into it, jump into it big and fast to see how you REALLY like it. Better to try and fail in 3-6 months than to let it drag on for years slowly with constant fear.” — Peter Michaels Allen

Life is too short to stay in a profession that is no longer fulfilling you. You don’t want to feel trapped on a career path with no end in sight.

The old days are over of choosing one profession for life. You shouldn’t feel forced to climb one career ladder for decades until you retire. 

While it’s never easy, making a big career change is certainly not as hard as it used to be. You have a world of education, training, and relevant network connections at your fingertips. 

Don’t be shy about reaching out for help!

⬆️ Scroll to the top if you want to listen to the audio version of this episode. 🎧

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

📣 Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Developing Your Writing FocusThis challenge helps you narrow down the focus of your writing. It gets you thinking about your goals and what you want to happen when more people start reading your words.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who also runs a professional and supportive online community (join us!). He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

My guest for this episode is Matt East. Matt is one of the world's leading experts on productivity and high-performance. You can learn more about his coaching and community on his business website, Matt East & Company.

He’s also the person who convinced me to start a podcast! If I hadn’t met Matt, the Invincible Career podcast probably wouldn’t exist.

His books, podcasts, and coaching teach how to plan your day so you can spend more time on the projects, activities, and relationships that are most important and meaningful to you. He's best known for his productivity coaching and mastermind, where he's been lucky enough to work with many incredible clients.

Matt is one of those success stories that I love to talk about. He left his corporate gig as a Vice President at MOBI Wireless Management 4 years ago and has been running his own business ever since.

Matt is the author of The Purposeful Planning Method: How to Plan Your Day, Beat Procrastination, and Regain Control of Your Time (my affiliate link). He hosts two popular podcasts, The Goal Achievement Podcast and the Better Humans Podcast. He’s also a startup enthusiast and advisor.

Matt lives in Indianapolis with his wife Rachel, and two dogs Spike and Sweet Pea.

Key points from our conversation

I want to call out a few points from my conversation with Matt to help you if you occasionally struggle with procrastination and having productive days.

Embrace failure

You need more failure to increase your odds of success. Matt essentially says that you have to get more “at-bats,” which, of course, means that you will experience more failure. But, that’s ok.

Some of the most successful people in this world experienced tons of failures along the way (e.g., Sir James Dyson, J.K. Rowling, Walt Disney, Oprah Winfrey). They didn’t just walk up, try something once, and immediately succeed.

The more you try, the more people you meet, and the more you put yourself out there, the more you will experience rejection. But, that also means that you will experience more positive total outcomes than taking one swing and giving up.

Focus

Matt recommends that you focus and decide what you want to be known for. He is known as the “productivity coach,” and that was an intentional decision.

It takes courage to niche down like that and resist the urge to do everything and appeal to everyone. You don’t need a massive audience to be successful. You don’t need to charge crazy fees to make a living.

The same is true for employees, not just entrepreneurs.

* What is your professional brand?

* What are you known for being the best at doing?

* Where should you focus and stake your claim?

Planning your days

Almost all high performers have clarity around how they are spending their days. They know what they will be working on, and they are intentional about their energy and focus.

In his book, Matt talks about planning your days using:

* The Fluid Layer

* The Habit Layer

Your priorities for a given day are your Fluid Layer activities. It changes from day to day and even throughout the day. For example, one morning, you might focus on writing during your fluid layer time and then updating your website in the afternoon.

On the other hand, your morning and evening routines are your Habit Layer activities. It’s the same every single day. What daily habits do you need to be happy, healthy, and more successful?

Successful people have consistent habits in the morning and evening. For example, getting up, making coffee, journaling, and exercising every morning. Then, at the end of the day, going for a walk every evening and reading for 30 minutes before bedtime.

⬆️ Scroll to the top if you want to listen to our full conversation and hear Matt’s generous offer to get his book for free. 🎧

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

📣 Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐  Choose a Newsletter PlatformThis challenge helps you become more familiar with setting up a newsletter service. It is the first step to building your email list and writing for that audience. The reassuring thing about newsletter and email services is that you’re not stuck with your decision. If you want to make a change, you can take your audience with you later.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who also runs a professional and supportive online community (join us!). He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that I was feeling completely burned out. I don’t often talk about my struggles or feelings of anxiety and depression. In my role as a coach, I try to maintain an upbeat attitude to help my clients feel positive and energized to conquer their personal challenges.

But I’m going to open up and be more vulnerable here than I normally feel comfortable doing. I’m lowering the walls and admitting that the burnout has been hitting me pretty hard. 

I'm sharing this because I think many of you might be feeling this way too. I want to help. 

The symptoms started adding up, and I couldn’t ignore them any longer. I was feeling down for days on end, sometimes for over a week. I’d briefly have a good afternoon but crash again for several more days.

My energy levels dropped, and I felt exhausted all the time. That isn’t normal for me. I was still forcing myself to exercise, which helped a little. But, it didn’t lift my mood like it usually did.

I didn’t feel motivated to work the long hours that I normally do. I wasn’t feeling hopeful, and I struggled to be creative. I just stopped caring about the future. 

I finally had to admit that what I was experiencing was burnout. Some of it was related to work stress, but much of it is connected to how long we’ve lived under these insane pandemic conditions for over a year now.

If the pandemic has left you feeling burned out, too, you are not alone. 62% of people surveyed in the fall of 2020 who were struggling to manage workloads said they had experienced burnout “often” or “extremely often” in the previous three months. 85% said their well-being had declined.

The World Health Organization has gone so far as to include burnout in the 11th Revision of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11) as an occupational phenomenon. Here is how they define it:

“Burnout is a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed. It is characterized by three dimensions:

* feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion;

* increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one's job; and

* reduced professional efficacy.”

People who are willing to talk about how they’ve been feeling are saying things like:

* I’m facing more mental health challenges than usual. 

* I haven’t been able to keep up my physical fitness.

* I’m so lonely and I never see my friends anymore. 

* I feel like this past year has set my career back.

* I’m in financial trouble now and worried about making ends meet. 

* There is so much uncertainty that it makes me feel constantly anxious. 

* I’m worried about my future.

There are many symptoms of burnout, and you can attribute some of them to other problems. For example, feeling frustrated and irritable could be related to burnout, or maybe you just work with a bunch of jerks. 

However, here is where I think the differences lie and when it gets so concerning that you have to do something about it:

* The feelings of apathy and hopelessness persist for weeks or even months. 

* Your career is at risk due to your lack of motivation, inability to focus and perform, lingering exhaustion, and cynicism about the future. 

* You stop taking care of yourself. 

We often talk about burnout as being something you personally feel and, therefore, must personally address (e.g., take a vacation, do more yoga). However, according to research, burnout has six main causes, and they don’t point to it being a personal problem that you can completely fix on your own:

* Unsustainable workload

* Perceived lack of control

* Insufficient rewards for effort

* Lack of a supportive community

* Lack of fairness

* Mismatched values and skills

It’s not entirely fair to point at employers as the sole cause of the problem, though. The global pandemic certainly contributed to a large amount of our stress and anxiety starting in early 2020. But, how employers managed the crisis did play a role in making things better or worse.

I wish that all employers would proactively take steps to recognize burnout and reduce the conditions contributing to it. But, unfortunately, we know that won’t happen. 

So, what can you do? How can you take care of yourself to prevent or recover from burnout if your employer won’t take action to help?

There are some steps you can take, which I share below. A few are under your control and will personally help you. Others may require a discussion with your boss. Some may require a change of environment.

I know the last suggestion sounds drastic, but your health and well-being are important. I’m familiar with making drastic changes in my life in response to burnout.

I went through burnout about five years ago when my startup failed. Our quality of life had already been declining in the Bay Area, and I couldn’t face going back into a corporate tech job and the long commutes again. So, we sold our home, moved away for a fresh start, and I started a new business that broke free from my past. In some ways, I felt like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

Recognize the warning signs

We all experience some of the symptoms associated with burnout from time to time. They include fatigue, forgetfulness, depression, detachment, irritability, and apathy.

However, there’s a difference between a bad day or week and having several bad weeks or months. If you are experiencing many of these symptoms for a prolonged period of time and you feel like you’re shutting down, you’re on the path to burning out.

Take action sooner rather than later. It’s easier to avoid total burnout than to recover from it later.

Recharge and recover

If you’re in the early phases of what could turn into burnout, taking a break can help. A weekend getaway or a short vacation may be just what you need to recharge your batteries.

It doesn’t solve the root problems that caused you to feel this way. But, it could help you recover enough to go back and dive into addressing them so that you don’t feel like you’re burning out again later.

Find the necessary support

If you’re already experiencing serious burnout and need help, here are a few online therapy resources:

* Talkspace

* 7 Cups

* BetterHelp

However, sometimes all you need is to know that you’re not alone. It helps to commiserate with peers who may be experiencing stress, anxiety, and the early signs of burnout too. Talking with others can help you work through your feelings and discuss potential solutions to some of the problems you’re facing.

For example, the members of my career accelerator community have said that our weekly meetings are a lifeline. We support each other, provide advice and feedback, and help each other laugh even when it’s been a bad week.

Create a sense of purpose

Having a sense of purpose can definitely make your work feel more meaningful. There will always be times that work is stressful, and you will feel overloaded. But, you can often get through it when you know that what you are working on matters.

I’ve certainly experienced this during my career. There were times that I felt like what I was doing was pointless (and that later proved to be true 😒). So, when I was working long hours and dealing with lots of stress, it only felt worse.

There were also times that I knew my work mattered and I was excited about what we were launching. The hours were crazy, and the workload was heavy, but in the end, I was proud of what we created. That sense of purpose carried me through so that I may have been tired, but I wasn’t burned out.

If your job never gives you a sense of purpose, that’s concerning. Finding a role where you feel like your work matters is a good investment of your time and energy.

Control your workload

As I mentioned above, one of the main causes of burnout is an unsustainable workload. If this is happening to you, you need to address it soon.

Unfortunately, most of us aren’t in full control of our workload. So, that means that you need to have a conversation with your manager.

Communicate with your manager

I hope you’re one of the lucky few people who have an amazing manager. If so, don’t be shy about scheduling a meeting with your manager to discuss how you are feeling. A good manager will want to help you avoid burnout.

Share how you feel and what you think contributes to the causes (e.g., workload, stress, missing support, lack of control). Be prepared with some ideas for how to address the issues and fix the problems.

Even if you don’t have a great manager, you still need to have this conversation. If you don’t and the situation continues to be unacceptable, you will burn out. It’s not an easy or fun conversation, but you need to set some boundaries for your own good.

Set limits and boundaries

Like any machine, you will break down if you are always being pushed past your limits. Working too many hours, dealing with too much stress, and living with too much anxiety isn’t sustainable.

Identify your limits and know when you need time to take care of yourself and recover every single day. I have learned that I need personal rituals and habits to stay healthy and sane (e.g., coffee breaks, journaling, time for exercise, dinner with my family every night).

Once you know what you want your boundaries to be, it’s time to have a conversation with your manager. Get the support you need to be healthy. If they can’t provide you with that support, it might be time to look for a better company culture and a better boss.

Connect with friends and family

Your friends and family provide a different type of comfort and support beyond what a community or therapist might provide. The conversations, laughter, and fun give you a welcome break from the stress of work.

While it may be difficult, it helps to set a time in the evenings when you put away your laptop, ignore work messages, and spend time with your friends and/or loved ones. This comes back to setting boundaries.

I had to start this practice around 13 years ago. Otherwise, work would consume all of my waking hours and ruin my weekends when I was supposed to be spending time with my family.

Own your future

Taking control of your future is empowering. Planning your career puts you in the driver’s seat instead of feeling like a victim trapped in a cycle of burnout when your job is the problem.

For example, one of my clients was experiencing some serious burnout in their current job. We tried to improve the situation for several months, but it didn’t work. So, we decided that it was time to plan a new future and find a better job.

In the past month of interviewing and receiving offers, they have experienced a massively positive turnaround in their sense of empowerment and control of their future. Seeing how valued they are and how well they will be treated elsewhere has sparked new hope.

They no longer feel like they are waiting for something to happen to them. They are making things happen for them. 

Recommit to hope

It’s not easy to escape the feeling that things will never get better. I’ve been there. It can seem so dark and hopeless.

However, when you do get help, make plans, and take action, things will get better. It won’t happen overnight, but you will see steady progress, and you know that your burnout won’t last forever.

Believe that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Know that it is possible to find a better environment where your well-being is important, and your needs are respected. Having hope helps you hang in there until your efforts pay off and you start feeling good again.

Avoiding future burnout

When you get better at recognizing the early signs of burnout, you’ll be able to catch the situation early and take action to avoid letting it happen. If you take control of your current work experience and take ownership of your future career path, you’ll also be able to keep things from getting out of control again.

Now, I know that sounds easier said than done, especially if you don’t work in a great company culture or have a supportive manager. But, then you have a tough decision to make.

Do you let the problems persist and risk your health and happiness, or do you make a big change and move on to a healthier environment?

I had to make the second choice. It wasn’t easy, and it came with its own stress and risks, of course.

I now make a fraction of the income than I did before when I was neck-deep in the stressful corporate world as an executive. I gave up a lot of money to essentially buy back my freedom to live life on my own terms and run my own business. To make it work, I had to aggressively lower my living expenses, sell my home, and move to a new environment with a more reasonable cost of living.

My health and well-being are worth it. The most recent burnout that I experienced wasn’t due to my working conditions. The source of my problems was the pandemic, the political climate in the U.S., and the stress it has placed on my children.

That’s why I’m feeling better now. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel with the global rollout of the vaccines. I am already making new plans for my business this year and considering international travel again. I have a renewed sense of purpose and hope, and that makes all the difference.

I want you to feel that sense of control, purpose, meaning, and hope too! Let me know how I can help.

⬆️ Scroll to the top if you want to listen to my reading of this and hear more details. 🎧

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

📣 Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Research Newsletter PlatformsThis challenge helps you learn more about the power of newsletters and owning your email list. It introduces you to the world of email services and marketing, which is still — surprisingly — one of the best ways to connect with an audience.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

My guest for this episode is Dayna Wu. She is the proud mom of two, Hawaii born and raised, and now residing in the San Francisco Bay Area. She’s a Senior Recruiter for Nvidia Corporation while being a distance learning teacher, short-order cook, housekeeper, physical fitness activity coordinator, and parent/wife all at the same time.

Over the course of 13 years, she’s worked at stealth and early-stage startups being the sole recruiter handling everything from sourcing candidates, setting up recruiting processes, negotiating and closing candidate offers, and working as a member of a global recruiting team at large public corporations.

She enjoys talking to people and helping them navigate the daunting interview process, by providing candidates all the information they need to evaluate that next step in their life and career. She works hard to establish long-term relationships and partner with people even if it doesn’t end up being a hire for the company. She also enjoys working with hiring managers to understand their roles, learning new things, and finding out how she can support their hiring needs.

Her favorite part of the recruiting process is helping to move things along; from discovering talent, interview coaching and preparedness, gathering interview feedback and next steps, offer negotiation and approvals, and ultimately delivering an offer that exceeds a candidate’s expectations.

In this podcast episode, you’ll hear about:

* Ways to make a good impression during a job interview.

* Behavior that will leave hiring teams with a bad impression of you.

* The good, the bad, and the ugly of her experiences with candidates.

* Things hiring managers can do to improve the recruiting experience.

* The balance of active vs. passive candidates.

Key points from our conversation

I want to call out a few points from my conversation with Dayna to help you if you are preparing for your upcoming job interviews and working with recruiters.

Be prepared

Dayna said she likes people who really prepare for an interview. She can tell when she talks with a candidate. She’ll have an early conversation about what they are looking for, why they’re interested in the company, etc.

Some ways to make a positive impression:

* Research the company.

* Research the interview panel.

* Ask if there are areas they would like you to focus on.

* Download the company’s app, try out the software, be familiar with the company’s products and services.

* Find and report bugs in the software.

* Be knowledgeable about the company’s blog posts.

* Contribute to their open-source software (if applicable).

* Have good enthusiasm and energy during the interview.

* Ask intelligent questions.

* Send “Thank you” notes after the interview.

Things candidates did to make a bad impression:

* Calling the company the wrong name.

* Expecting an early-stage startup to have the same benefits as a large corporation.

* Asking for way too much equity.

* Taking their shoes off and putting their feet up on the table.

* Staring at her chest.

Be humble

It’s always a good idea to be humble and polite during an interview. We all like people with confidence. But, there is a fine line between being proud of your talent, skills, and experience and being arrogant.

Some bad experiences Dayna’s had with candidates:

* Asking for a car as part of their offer.

* Referring to themselves as “Rolex watches.”

* Being demanding during an interview.

* Being rude and having an attitude during conversations.

Be professional

Sometimes a company will be super casual with a candidate to see how the person “cuts loose” and what that looks like. Some people fall into the trap of being too comfortable, cursing, sharing inappropriate stories, etc.

Some negative experiences she’s had with candidates:

* Refusing to be flexible during the offer negotiation process.

* Making unreasonable meal requests.

* Cutting her off while she’s speaking.

* Not being ready for an interview call and asking her to call back later.

* During the interview, telling her that they’d prefer to work for a different company.

* Shaking her hand way too firmly and pulling her around.

You should always focus on being professional. Remember that you’re always being evaluated, even during casual moments like having lunch with the team.

🎧 Listen to my full conversation with Dayna to hear more of her stories (e.g., issues with hiring managers) and her amazing insider’s advice that will help you nail your next job interview!

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Learn about Self-publishingThis challenge helps you learn more about sharing your wisdom with the world through writing a book. The traditional gatekeepers are fading away, and the book publishing world is no different.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

Writing is one of the most important communication skills that can future-proof your career. Yet, it remains one of the biggest skill gaps that employers see in job candidates. 

“People jump to all kinds of conclusions about you when they read documents you have written. They decide, for instance, how smart, how creative, how well organized, how trustworthy, and how considerate you are. And once they have made up their minds, it is hard to get them to see you differently. Research in social psychology shows how sticky early impressions are. It takes serious work on the receiving end to undo them — work that your colleagues, customers, and partners may not have time (or feel motivated) to do.” — Barbara Wallraff, Improve Your Writing to Improve Your Credibility

The good news is that learning to write well has never been more approachable than it is today. Also, it’s never been easier to publish your words and have them reach thousands or even millions of people. 

When I first started writing, I used an electric typewriter. I dreamed of publishing a book but felt overwhelmed by all of the gatekeepers (e.g., agents, editors, publishers). The whole process seemed so complex that I’m still left with a dozen drafts in varying stages of completion.

Today, you can crank out an article or story online, run it through Grammarly (my affiliate link), publish it, and have people all around the world reading your words within seconds. It’s magical! 

Ok, maybe the process only seems magical to someone like me who wrote on a typewriter before the internet existed. But, do you know what is still magical? 

The results — the impact that it can have on your life and the lives of others.

Anyone can be a writer, and everyone can benefit from making it a consistent habit.

Writing helps you professionally

There are many ways to reach an audience that wants to hear what you have to say. But, it’s hard to beat writing for the ease of creation and the reach it has for discovery and consumption. 

Other methods such as videos and podcasting (which I do produce too) are definitely more time-consuming to create and publish. They are also more challenging for search and discovery. Text-based search engines, like Google, still dominate. 

Writing also remains — for now — a human skill that AI has yet to master. So, take advantage of this opportunity and build an audience while you can!

“Many jobs require additional and very human qualities like communication, empathy, creativity, strategic thinking, questioning, and dreaming. Collectively, we often refer to these qualities as ‘soft skills,’ but don’t let the name fool you; these soft skills are going to be hard currency in the job market as AI and technology take over some of the jobs that can be performed without people.” — Bernard Marr, 7 Job Skills Of The Future (That AIs And Robots Can't Do Better Than Humans)

What’s one of the best ways to showcase your communication skills, empathy, creativity, strategic thinking, vision, and wisdom? Yeah, that would be writing. 

When I work with my clients, I almost always recommend that they start a writing practice. Publishing your words of wisdom, expertise, and point of view helps the right people discover you. 

While the 1% rule may be a little outdated, it is still quite true that a tiny percentage of the population are creators while the majority are consumers. Most people will never consistently produce well-written content that attracts an audience. 

Yes, of course, many people post photos on Instagram, snarky tweets on Twitter, Facebook updates about their kids, and ask strange questions on Reddit. But, that’s not the same as writing a coherent article or intriguing story. 

When you have a strong opinion and are brave enough to share it, you will stand out. You will attract the right people and push away the wrong ones. 

I have connected with thousands of people over the years through my writing. It is the primary way that people discover me and my coaching practice. Writing and public speaking have both had a seriously positive impact on my professional life.

But don’t just take my word for it. I spoke with a few clients and friends who agreed to share their thoughts on how writing has changed their lives.

In the audio podcast for this newsletter (click play above), you can hear them talk about writing, why they do it, and how it has helped them personally and professionally.

* Terri Rodriguez-Hong talks about how she has been writing articles every week on accessibility, design, investing in yourself, and having a strong mindset.

* Christopher Schutt shares how writing has given him more confidence, expanded his network, and allows him to talk about issues he feels strongly about.

* Anna Codina talks about how her writing powers her business as a freelance content strategist and gives her the flexibility to travel around the world and work with a variety of international clients.

* Trip O’Dell shares how writing helped him refocus on what he cares most about in his career (e.g., accessibility, inclusive design, ethics in product design). Writing has also helped him get more attention online, book speaking opportunities, and clarify how he thinks about things.

Writing also helps you personally

Writing is useful on a personal level too. It’s an effective tool that extends the power of your mind. 

“Keep a notebook. Travel with it, eat with it, sleep with it. Slap into it every stray thought that flutters up into your brain. Cheap paper is less perishable than gray matter. And lead pencil markings endure longer than memory.” — Jack London

Our memory is imperfect. Our thinking is often frenetic and fragmented. Many of us become easily distracted. 

Writing is the solution for all of this. It extends your memory and becomes a permanent store of your thoughts. It helps you work through issues and provides a structure for your thinking process. It helps you focus and refocus. 

I’ve found that writing always helps me organize my thoughts. I can quickly stream words onto the page to ensure that I capture it all. Editing then takes that chaos and provides a coherent structure. 

I’m sure you’ve experienced that feeling of a million ideas, issues, and problems swirling around in your brain. I know many people who have trouble falling asleep at night because their mind is racing. 

The simple act of quickly capturing those thoughts in a paper notebook helps me fall asleep more easily in the evening. I know that I can’t make more progress or solve problems at bedtime. I know that I need to sleep. But, I can’t relax until those issues are written down, so I will remember to deal with them in the morning. 

Then, morning journaling helps me focus my day. I harness my creativity before the tasks of the workday strip it away. I jot down what my goals are and what I want to accomplish. I capture random thoughts and feelings. 

The writing activity is often cathartic. Research has found that writing can help you process traumatic, stressful, or emotional events, which improves your physical and psychological well-being. 

In Opening Up: The Healing Power of Expressing Emotions (my affiliate link) by psychologist James W. Pennebaker, he shares research that writing can even boost your immune system. More studies have found that “emotional writing” can lower blood pressure, reduce feelings of depression, and elevate daily moods.

So, even if you’re not yet sold on my recommendation of writing to boost your career — perhaps because you’re a little nervous about putting yourself out there — writing for your eyes only can be very beneficial. 

Your writing can help others

Finally, sharing your wisdom and advice can help others. For some people, that is the primary reason that they write. They want to help other people. They want to help them deal with issues, avoid mistakes, be successful, and perhaps even be happier. 

Much of my writing is focused on “How to” information and strategies for tackling various issues. I enjoy helping you conquer problems at work, be more successful, let the world know that you exist, and regain your freedom so you can work and live on your own terms. 

But I also write about coping with personal issues too. I’ve shared a few stories from my childhood and earlier life that I hope can help others. 

I’ve had people comment and message me privately. I have often been surprised to discover that a story has helped someone in an unexpected way.

Some examples from comments on my stories:

* “Thank you for your reassurance. I always feel that I’m alone in going through this type of situation. I don’t want to feel that I’m the only one anymore.”

* “I thought this is just me. Thank you. Very much.”

* “Thank you for this. I have been doing something similar and it is nice to see it affirmed by someone who has already done it!!”

* “Great article Larry – thank you. You’ve certainly been able to convey a different perspective on what has worked for me in the past without knowing why. I’m going to revisit some of your suggestions. The one benefit of getting older is that experience teaches us what has worked for before and what hasn’t. Your article has really helped with understanding the ‘why.’”

* “Great article! Forwarded it to a friend who is also frightened of small talk and socializing.”

* “Thank you, Larry, for making me feel vindicated and valued at the same time! Sometimes it is very difficult to live (and explain to people) the life of an introvert.”

If you’ve read this far, even if you don’t care about writing to help yourself professionally or personally, you may want to consider how your writing could help a fellow human being. 

You never know how much your advice could benefit someone else. You never know how much your experience could help someone overcome their anxiety, fear, and shame. 

Words are powerful.

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.

https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Cross-publish your writing

This challenge helps you get more mileage out of your writing. As I know, creating content is hard work. So, you should leverage it across multiple platforms. You almost always get unique and additional engagement that is valuable for you.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

My guest for this episode is Jeremy Baker. He is the co-founder and CTO of Retail Zipline, an enterprise SaaS company that provides communications software to some of the world's largest retailers.

He is a seasoned developer and entrepreneur who has been involved in web design, online product development, and technology startups since 1997.

Prior to Zipline, Jeremy co-founded MightyHive, an enterprise software startup acquired by S4 Capital for $150M. Before that, he worked as a Senior Prototyper at Yahoo! for nearly five years, which is where I met Jeremy when he joined my Search team way back in 2007.

In this podcast episode, you’ll hear about:

* His nontraditional engineering career path (without a CS degree).

* What has helped him be successful (including luck).

* What he looks for in the talent he is hiring.

* His experiences in the corporate and entrepreneurial worlds.

* The value of mentoring and giving back.

Key points from our conversation

I want to call out a few points from my conversation with Jeremy to help you as you are seeking to create your own invincible career.

Grit vs. credentials

Jeremy does not have a traditional CS degree. He was a self-taught developer and very entrepreneurial. He started his first hardware company when he was 16 years old, selling computers he assembled to local businesses.

He started several small businesses to hustle and make a living when he was young. He got hands-on experience developing solutions for companies while his friends in university were learning CS fundamentals.

He spent about 10 years building businesses from the ground up. Even though he didn’t have a college degree, his grit, determination, and real-world experience impressed me, and I hired him for my Yahoo! Search team.

Don’t let a lack of credentials hold you back. The world is changing, and more companies are hiring people who can do the work even though they don’t have an advanced degree.

Recognizing talent

He builds teams with complementary skill sets. You need a few people who are good at disrupting things, but you need many more people who can keep moving projects forward.

Things he looks for:

* His company is 100% distributed, so he looks for people who can write and clearly articulate their thoughts in code and communication.

* He also looks for people with curiosity. If a candidate hasn’t researched the company, team, or role, they don’t care very much. If they have very few questions, it’s a sign that they don’t have the curiosity that will help them really dive into problems and understand how things work.

* Finally, he looks for kindness. I think we’re all tired of working with unkind people.

Giving back

Books, mentors, and failures have been the biggest ways he’s learned. Mentors have really been key to his success.

He has an executive coach now who is helping him continue to grow. It’s important for breaking out of the isolated perspective you may have.

It’s so valuable to be a mentor and give back. You’re not only helping others, but you also learn from the people you mentor too. It’s a wonderful exchange of value. You both share experiences and become better people.

Thanks for listening to this episode! I hope you enjoyed hearing about Jeremy’s career path and the advice he shared.

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Publish on MediumMaking a ton of money on Medium isn’t the point of this challenge. Sure, a little spending money is a nice side effect. But, it’s more about what writing and publishing will do for you personally and professionally.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

“I had to let half of the team go. They didn’t have the right skills and attitude for the strategic new direction the company is heading.” — anonymous leader

The leader I was talking with wasn’t happy about this situation. They had inherited a team that was no longer performing well. The company was in the middle of a significant transformation into a new space and business model.

While some employees could be coached to adapt and stay with the company, others weren’t so lucky — for various reasons. If you manage a team, then you have probably been in a similar situation. It isn’t always possible to turn things around with employees who aren’t meeting expectations. 

Why do bosses fire people? Some reasons are quite obvious. But, others are a bit more subtle. 

Obvious reasons:

* Poor performance

* Misconduct

* Violating company policies

* Breaking the law

* Insubordination

Less obvious reasons:

* Employees aren’t adaptable

* They have a poor attitude

* They create too much conflict

* They disrupt other employees

* Their boss sees them as a threat

Below are some clues that you may be on your manager’s secret termination list. Read through them to see if anything looks familiar. Score yourself — or a friend — on a scale of 1 to 5 for each question.

* 5 - the issue is severe and happens frequently

* 4 - the issue is bad and happens too often

* 3 - it isn’t that bad and happens only a few times

* 2 - it’s under control and rarely happens

* 1 - it never happens, or it doesn’t apply to you

1. How negative was your performance review?

Many companies wrapped up their annual performance evaluations in February. By now, I would imagine that you’ve received your review for the past year.

How did you do? If it was overwhelmingly positive, you should have nothing to worry about. However, if it wasn’t…

One bad review doesn’t usually mean that you’re going to lose your job. But, if there has been a trend of negative reviews and you’re having other issues at work (e.g., on projects or with your manager and coworkers), then your job might be at risk. 

2. How often are you left out of important meetings?

Occasionally, people forget to invite you to an important meeting. It’s not great, but it’s not the end of the world if it doesn’t happen very often.

However, if you are frequently left out of meetings you think you should be attending, that’s a problem. If it’s been happening with increasing frequency, that’s bad. It indicates that something has changed in how your value and contributions are perceived.

3. How often are you left off of important messages?

Similarly, if you’re being left off important email threads or not looped into critical Slack chats, that’s not good. You’re no longer viewed as essential to the conversations and decision-making process.

This can happen when you conflict with coworkers. People sometimes play little power games and try to sideline you. But, if your manager is the one leaving you off emails and messages, that’s a sign that your job is in trouble.

4. Does your manager reschedule your 1-on-1s?

How often does your manager reschedule, cancel, or miss your 1-on-1 meetings? Some bosses are consistently terrible at sticking with a meeting schedule with their employees.

However, if your manager somehow manages to meet with other people but not you, that’s bad. There’s some reason that you’re the only one being ignored.

5. Does someone else get the plum projects?

Of course, managers try to give the most talented employees the biggest and best projects. But, they shouldn’t play favorites, and they should give everyone a chance to prove themselves.

However, if you never seem to be assigned the best projects, that’s a sign that your manager doesn’t trust you to deliver. Depending on what else is happening, your job may not be at risk, but you’re obviously not on the promotion path either.

6. Have you stopped receiving perks?

If you used to receive special treatment and nice perks, but it’s been slowing down or has stopped, something has changed. Pay attention to how your colleagues are being treated.

At one startup I joined, the perks slowly dried up and eventually vanished. But, it was happening to all of us. I wasn’t being singled out to be fired. The company was failing, and we all were going to lose our jobs.

7. Are you left out of planning meetings?

Have you noticed that you’re no longer being invited to planning meetings? Well, you may not be invited to the meetings to determine the future of products, the organization, or the company because you no longer have a future with the company. 

I remember seeing this happen at one company. It was pretty clear who had been put on a layoff list. Those individuals were suddenly uninvited from meetings where confidential information was shared and strategic plans were being made.

8. Has your boss set unreasonable expectations?

If you’ve been put on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP) with an unreasonable bar for acceptable performance, they are trying to force you out. This can happen even without a PIP in place. 

Sometimes a boss doesn’t want to fire you or doesn’t want to put in all of the work to justify your termination. So, they focus on making your life so miserable that you quit on your own. 

9. How often does your boss publicly criticize you?

This is something that only a terrible boss would do, but it does happen. I’m sure you’ve witnessed it.

But, if you’re the one being called out by your manager in meetings and frequently criticized in front of others, that’s a sign that your job is at risk. They may be trying to make your performance issues publicly known to help support the case for your termination.

10. Are coworkers acting uncomfortable around you?

People start to distance themselves when they can tell that someone is on the outs with the boss. Sometimes they are guessing that your job is in trouble. Other times, information is leaked, people gossip, and others already know that you’re going to be fired. 

It’s one thing if a coworker or two behaves strangely around you. Everyone has bad days or weeks. You never know what others are dealing with in their lives.

However, if several of your coworkers are acting funny, avoiding you, or seem to be whispering behind your back, they probably know something you don’t.

How did you score?

* 10-19: Your job is probably safe for now.

* 20-29: Time for damage control to save your job.

* 30-39: Update your resume and start interviewing.

* 40-50: You may have already been fired.

The reality is that a high score on any of the questions is a bad thing. It doesn’t take much for a negative situation to spill over and impact your performance and work relationships.

For example, if your boss sets you up for failure with unreasonable expectations, your performance will suffer, and your next review will be negative. If that continues, you’ll be on your way out.

What can you do?

If you fear that you’re at risk for termination, the most important question is:

“Do you want to stay?”

If you’re in a hostile work environment, your performance is suffering, and your work relationships are deteriorating, you may have already decided that you want to quit. But, it’s better to quit than to be fired.

If you’ve watched senior leaders and executives, you may have noticed that they are rarely fired. Experienced people recognize the warning signs long before an actual termination is planned.

They can read the writing on the wall. So, they often negotiate a severance package and plan a gracious exit. Or, before things reach that point, they move on to greener pastures where they have a chance of being more successful.

If you do want to stay, you shouldn’t adopt a “wait and see” strategy. You can’t hope that things will blow over and everything will magically get better. If you’re noticing these issues, your boss is noticing them too.

Is there anything worse than waiting for the imaginary axe to fall? Instead, be proactive and face things head-on.

You probably know why some of these things are happening if you’re at fault (e.g., your last project was a failure, you’re not collaborating well with others, you lose your temper in meetings).

Or, maybe you’ve done nothing wrong, and you just have a terrible boss who behaves like a jerk. That happens more often than we’d hope.

Regardless, create a strategy and a plan to address the situation and turn things around. Have an honest conversation with your manager and put the “dead moose” on the table, as we used to say at eBay. Start managing your manager.

Maybe it’s just me, but I prefer to be in control and take action instead of waiting for things to happen to me.

I’d rather create my own performance improvement plan instead of waiting for my boss and HR to hit me with a surprise PIP.

I’d rather quit and walk out under my own terms instead of waiting passively to be fired.

Layoffs and terminations are part of our working lives. They happen, whether we want them to or not. But, you can be proactive and stay in control no matter what happens, and that has a positive impact on your confidence and the future of your career.

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc. Thanks in advance!

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Post on Your Personal BlogWhen you craft a well-structured story or article with the intent to inform, educate, or persuade others, you deepen your comprehension of that topic. As more people discover your writing, more people will perceive you as an expert.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

My guest for this episode is Caroline Tsay. Caroline is the CEO and co-founder of Compute Software. Their Cloud Cost Optimization platform delivers the deepest cost savings for your cloud infrastructure running on Amazon Web Services, Microsoft Azure, or Google Cloud. Caroline was also one of the most talented Product Leaders that I worked with in Silicon Valley.

In this podcast episode, you’ll hear about how she started down her tech path with a B.S. in Computer Science from Stanford University. She went on to receive an M.S. in Management Science & Engineering from Stanford, as well. Then, she got her start in the working world as a Senior Consultant with IBM Global Business Services.

She joined Yahoo! in 2007, spent 6 years there, and worked her way up to become a Senior Director of Product Management for Y! Search and E-Commerce. I was lucky enough to work with Caroline for about a year after she joined my Search Product team.

She left in 2013 to join Hewlett Packard Enterprise as a Vice President and General Manager. An executive coach encouraged her to do more public speaking, and that opened the door to her first board seat with Rosetta Stone.

She currently sits on the board of directors for The Coca-Cola Company and Morningstar. She was previously on the board of Codefresh.

In this episode, she shares advice from her career path and some great recommendations for startup founders and people interested in starting their own companies.

Key points from our conversation

I want to call out a few points from my conversation with Caroline to help you as you are seeking to create your own invincible career.

Build relationships

It’s crucial to build relationships and partner well with others at work. Caroline was always able to get so much done by being collaborative and kind vs. confrontational and combative.

Partner intelligently

As you move up the career ladder — especially if you’re interested in becoming a leader or starting your own company — seek to partner with people who complement your talents and skills. Find a partner who will balance your strengths and weaknesses.

Invest in yourself

Of course, I’m a little biased, but I loved hearing how she worked with an executive coach who encouraged her to do more public speaking. As you will hear her say, it opened doors to land her first board seat.

Thanks for listening to this episode! I really enjoyed catching up with Caroline.

Prefer to listen on Spotify? Or, Apple Podcasts?

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I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out. https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Share Your WebsiteThis challenge forces you to make it all real. I know way too many people that have been sitting on a draft website — or a redesigned one — forever. They can’t bring themselves to push the button and launch the darn thing.

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a professional online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.

The inspiration for this week’s topic comes from a podcast listener, LP Lin.

You mentioned that you ask questions to keep the conversation flowing. It sounds like an excellent topic for your next podcast: Smart questioning techniques of an interesting conversationalist : )

Larry, it’d be helpful if you’d reveal the different types of questioning techniques from the straight forward ‘Why’ to more advanced levels you used to spice up a conversation and minimise the risk of others feeling intimidated.

Conversational skills don’t come naturally for me — at all. I’m a bit shy in group settings. I’m an introvert who would prefer to fade back into a dark corner and observe the room.

However, I had to work on myself to get better at engaging with people since it was a useful skillset for my profession when I was a Product executive and doing a lot of public speaking and events. It’s even more important for me now as a leadership coach and career advisor.

Being a great conversationalist comes down to three things:

* Preparation

* Engagement

* Curiosity

Preparation

I know that preparation sounds like homework 😐. While it can be for conversations in professional situations (e.g., job interviews, conference meetups, networking events), I’m speaking of preparation in a broader sense of taking a little time to learn more about the context and people in a given setting.

When you come up with some ideas related to an event, you’ll be prepared to have something interesting to discuss. For example, before I attended a meetup at a company’s headquarters, I browsed their recent press releases, product announcements, and other news in their industry. That made it easier to talk with people about something relevant with which they were familiar (e.g., one of their recent releases).

If you know who you will be meeting, do your homework. Read about their background, where they went to school, where they’ve worked, what they’ve written or posted online (within reason… don’t be creepy 🤣).

You can immediately build rapport with someone by discussing something about them. It shows that you cared enough to check them out and think about questions to ask and things to discuss.

I’ve had that happen, and I must admit that it’s a bit flattering! Despite what people might say, human beings enjoy a little flattery.

Engagement

This is where most people fall flat on their faces during a conversation. Everyone — ok, almost everyone — is distracted by their phones.

I’m sure you’ve also experienced a disappointing conversation with someone whose eyes were darting all around the room looking for someone “more important” to talk with next. Wow. Talk about making someone feel terrible.

Give your conversational partners 100% of your attention. 100%.

If you can’t do that, excuse yourself and leave. Don’t be that distracted person who phubs others, answers questions in a halfhearted manner, or constantly glances around the room.

The online version of this in Zoom meetings are the people who are obviously checking their email or reading Slack messages while you’re talking with them. Sure, this can happen in huge meetings when some exec is doing a long and boring All Hands update (yawn).

However, you shouldn’t do this to people in smaller meetings. It probably doesn’t feel great when people ignore you and act like anything else they're doing is more important than listening to you. Right? So, don’t tune out and make others feel unimportant.

You know that we can see the lighting on your face change as you switch between app windows, right? You do know that we can see your eyes scanning lines of text?

On the flip side, pay attention to your conversational partner — in person or on Zoom. How are they reacting? Note their facial expressions and watch their eyes (it’s pretty much all we have with video chat now).

You can tell when someone seems interested and actively engaged. You can also tell when you’re losing someone, and they might be getting bored because you’ve been talking for too long.

Remember, a good conversation is give and take. Each person should be speaking about 50% of the time.

Curiosity

There are actually five dimensions of curiosity. Being a curious person isn’t a binary trait of being curious about things or not.

The dimensions that Dr. Todd Kashdan et al. uncovered are:

* Joyous Exploration - seeking knowledge and information with the joy of learning and growing

* Deprivation Sensitivity - philosophically pondering complex ideas and solving problems

* Stress Tolerance - a willingness to explore confusing, complex areas even when it causes anxiety and doubt

* Social Curiosity (overt and covert) - curiosity about people and what they think and do

* Thrill Seeking - taking risks to have varied and intense experiences

Overt social curiosity is a healthy interest in understanding other people's behaviors, thoughts, and feelings. As you might imagine, people high in this trait tend to also be high in empathy. This combination of traits can help someone be very tuned in to their conversational partner.

The best conversationalists that come to mind in my life are those who seemed genuinely curious about me. So much so that I wondered if they were faking it.

In my head, I remember thinking:

“Really? You’re interested in me? You want to know more about me and what I do?”

Regardless of their true intent, it worked. I enjoyed the attention, and the conversation felt natural as they asked more questions. And, in turn, I asked questions about them.

Asking open questions will often lead to a more interesting conversation. Closed questions that can be answered with “yes” or “no” make it more challenging to keep a conversation flowing. Instead, it feels like you’re grilling the other person.

For example, asking, “Do you work with Susan?” might lead to a quick answer that closes the door. But, asking, “How did you meet Susan?” will open the discussion to a more interesting story about that experience.

So, speaking of questions, let’s dive into some examples that you might find useful for your next conversation.

Questions - from simple to spicy

Gauge the receptivity of your conversational partner. It’s a social dance with subtle signals, ebb and flow, and testing the waters.

Some people will only be comfortable with a conversation that stays on the surface level of the event or situation. I’ve met people like that at conferences. We discussed the talks and panels, but they seemed reluctant to have the discussion drift into more personal questions about themselves and their work. You can’t force it.

Simple safe questions to break the ice

* What has been your favorite talk so far?

* How long have you been a part of this organization?

* What advice would you give someone starting in this field?

* What’s the most recent book you’ve read? Would you recommend it?

* What’s the best conference you’ve ever attended?

* What’s the most interesting thing you’ve been working on lately?

* How do you feel about working from home?

* What are your best tips for staying productive at home?

* What professional skills are you focused on this year?

* What’s your favorite restaurant in this city?

* Where is the first place that you want to visit when we can travel again?

* What’s your favorite app, and why?

* What do you think of industry trend XYZ?

* Have you watched any good movies this year?

Other people I’ve met at events were immediately more playful and fun to talk with. They would joke around, laugh often, and ask questions about my personal life.

"A stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet." - Will Rogers

It was almost like running into an old friend, but one I’d never met before. Soon, a small group of us were heading out for dinner and drinks. Ah, I miss those days…

Daring and fun questions

* In what ways has social media made our lives both better and worse?

* As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

* What is the secret to happiness?

* Where did you grow up? What was it like growing up there?

* Would you be interested in colonizing Mars? Why or why not?

* Do you think there is other life in the universe? Why or why not?

* How will AI help us and hurt us?

* If you could restart your career from the beginning, would you still choose this path?

* What is your biggest regret in life?

* What would you change in your life if you could start over?

* What are the top five things on your bucket list?

* What motivates and inspires you?

* What’s your favorite way to spend the weekend?

* Who do you look up to in the industry?

* What’s the worst travel experience you’ve had?

* What’s your go-to karaoke song?

* What would happen if we legalized all drugs?

* If you could only have one album on our Spotify playlist, what would it be?

* What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

* Where would you want to build your dream home?

* What is your idea of a dream job?

* What is the next big adventure you want to pursue?

* Who is your favorite author, and what is the best book they’ve written?

In my life, I’ve had a few friends and family members (very few) who were willing to get into deep philosophical and metaphysical discussions about the meaning of life, the existence of time, good and evil, reality vs. our perception of it, etc.

We enjoyed hurting each other’s brains with questions and conversations about life and death, psychology, economics, and any other crazy things that would pop into our heads.

Make sure you are really comfortable with other people before you head down this path. Otherwise, they might feel intimidated, shocked, and make a quick exit.

Spicy questions for the bold

* What’s the one thing holding you back from doing what you really want to do?

* Are we living in a simulation? How could you even tell if we are or not?

* What is something you’ve never told anyone?

* If all you can do is perceive the world around you through your sensory systems, how do you really know if anything exists?

* What is your weirdest quirk?

* How do you know that your “reality” isn’t just a hallucination occurring in your brain?

* What would happen if we implemented Universal Basic Income?

* What would you do if you never had to work again?

* How do you know that you’re not lying in a coma right now, dreaming all of this?

* Are some people born evil?

* What do you really think happens after we die?

* What’s stressing you out this week?

* What would you do with your life if you knew you were immortal?

* What’s one way I could help you?

* Are you looking forward to retirement? Why or why not?

Do you know what the big secret is?

Maybe you’ve already figured this out from what I’ve been saying. The secret to being a great conversationalist is:

Showing a genuine interest in your conversational partner.

That means asking lots of questions, truly listening to the answers, following up with more relevant questions, and letting the conversation flow naturally from what you hear them say.

The sample questions I shared above are just some ideas for breaking the ice and having fun. In a real conversation, you wouldn’t pepper the person with an endless stream of unrelated questions like that.

If you’ve watched a talented interviewer on television or observed one in person, you probably noticed how they dovetail their reaction to an answer and ask natural follow-up questions to keep the conversation going. They help keep the discussion on track thematically.

For example:

* “What’s the most interesting thing you’ve been working on lately?”

* (Their answer…)

* “Oh, I read about that! It sounds really cool. What’s the biggest challenge you’ve faced with it?”

* (Their answer…)

* “Ah, yes. I’m familiar with that pain. I ran into that on a project last year. Are you using solution XYZ to address it?”

* (Their answer…)

* “Interesting, I haven’t heard about that before. How do you like it?”

* And so on…

Avoid these mistakes

Occasionally, I run into someone who does one or more of the following during a conversation. Unsurprisingly, I then do everything I can to avoid being pulled into a discussion with this person in the future.

* Dominating the conversation or talking endlessly about themself (e.g., “So, it all began when I was six years old… and then I went to college… and then I started my first job…”)

* Bragging and humblebragging (e.g., “So, I turned to Zuck and said, ‘You know what? We should buy Instagram!’ and everyone in the room was blown away by my brilliance.”)

* Trivializing something you say (e.g., “Oh, you liked that book? I thought that it was too superficial. Not really my preference.”)

* One-upping you (e.g., “That’s nothing! I had a product launch last quarter that was twice as big as that one and delivered 3x the revenue.”)

* Correcting you, acting as if they know more than you do, and telling you what you should think, feel, or do — AKA mansplaining — (e.g., “That bothered you? You shouldn’t let it get to you. What you really should do next time is…”)

* Barely paying attention to you while they impatiently wait for their turn to talk (e.g., “Right, right. Ok. Well, anyway… this is what I’ve been doing lately.”)

Conversational skills matter

If you are lucky enough to find yourself with someone who also understands the nuances of a delightful conversation, they will be asking you just as many questions as you ask them. You’ll notice that they are paying attention to what you say. You will feel like they are genuinely interested in you.

Everyone wants to be seen.

We want to be heard.

We want to feel like we matter. One of the greatest gifts you can give another human being is your full attention in a conversation so that they can feel this way — if only for a brief moment in time.

If you do this, they will remember you fondly forever.

A way to support my newsletter

I know that not everyone is ready to become a paid subscriber. But, there is a great way you can support my work without spending any money:

Recommending my newsletter on social media.

It only takes a few seconds, and it helps grow my business so I can continue making time to write it.

I'll even provide some copy and paste text to make it easy to share on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc.

I've really been enjoying the Invincible Career newsletter by Larry Cornett (@cornett). If you want to get ahead in your career and you aren’t subscribed yet, you’re missing out.

https://newsletter.invinciblecareer.com

Thanks in advance!

This week’s professional development challenge

⭐ Choose hosting for your websiteYou’re learning how to set up and run your own website on your own domain. Remember, this is for the rest of your online life, so the investment in your skills and knowledge is worth it. You will control the destiny of your “online home.”

Larry Cornett is a leadership coach and business advisor who runs a supportive online community. He lives in Northern California near Lake Tahoe with his wife and children, and a gigantic Great Dane. He does his best to share advice that can help others take full control of their work and life. He’s also on Twitter @cornett.