Relationship Truth: Unfiltered

Is He Really Sorry?

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He says he's sorry. That you should forgive. But how do you know his words are true, that he won't repeat this sin in the future? 

Takeaways:

Two questions to ask in order to determine if he's truly sorry:

  1. Does he care, through his actions as well as is words, about the impact his sin has on you?
  • Is he committed to change, actively working on himself so that the sin does not repeat itself?

    • How to get over your anger and disappointment

    • Forgive. Cancel the debt. This is a decision. You no longer expect anything from this person. You don’t have to trust him again but it will be best for your own well-being if you can forgive and let go of what happened. Forgiveness is freedom for you. 
  • It may take time for you to forgive. You don’t have to restore your relationship right away. If the person who sinned against you demands forgiveness, that’s a red flag. You need to go through a grief process. 
  • Accept the fact that we live with imperfect people.  

    • Two paths to people “waking up” and repenting

    1. Words are the first path to getting someone to wake up. Honest, gentle, loving words. When we aren’t speaking the truth in love we aren’t loving well.

  • Sometimes words don’t work. Consequences wake people up. Consequences can be a gift.

    • Resources:

    Register for Leslie's free, live webinar, "How long should you keep hoping for your destructive spouse to change and how will you know his change is real?" Click here to register: https://leslievernick.com/freetraining 

    Find more resources at www.leslievernick.com 

     

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    Relationship Truth: UnfilteredBy Leslie Vernick