This week’s idiots are throwing hands, throwing tantrums, and throwing all common sense out the window. It’s giving chaotic neutral, it’s giving Florida, and it’s giving somebody call somebody.

First up: a man at a Florida Publix decided the best way to settle a dispute was to pummel three people with a metal shelf. Sir, this is a grocery store—not WrestleMania.

Then, a drunk man looked at an ambulance and said, “That’s my Uber now.” Spoiler: it was not.

Next, a mom turned a plane into a hostage situation because her daughter wasn’t ready to leave. Ma’am, this is Frontier, not daycare.

And finally, a woman bought a set of knives and immediately used them to express her feelings. We call that retail therapy gone rogue.

Tune in, laugh loud, and judge harder than your grandma at a family reunion. Because the foolishness is fresh, and the title is up for grabs.

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