Welcome to another episode of Trump Mafia. I am your returning host, Aaron May.

The target... I mean subject of this episode of Trump Mafia is Jared “The Kush” Kushner. The most spectacularly unqualified member of Trump’s cabal. On past episodes, we have covered equally notable names but at least they had a story to their story.

This guy is a Late-Night Talk Show punchline.

We def will cover his past and give you background, but at the end of the day, he’s just a trust fund douchebag whose ultra-rich real estate felon of a father, Charlie “OG Kush” Kushner, greased 2 state senators & the school to get Jared into Harvard, at some point hooks up with Trump’s daughter and bingo bongo, he’s in charge of bringing peace to the middle east. You know, a kush job.

I have racked my brain thinking that there HAD to be SOME genius nefarious move for having this Sentient Kohl’s Mannequin (to quote John Oliver), as an advisor. Had to be something more than nepotism, something that made sense like Kushner had a secret pipeline to a Russian sex ring that The Don could grab some more pussy from.

I even pondered the possibility of a dark secret that the Kush could extort The Don over, but that would be too smart for the Kush.

So WHY THE FUCK is this “Harvard’s Shiniest Mistake” in the White House? Even ex-Harvard schoolmate Natalie Portman thinks he’s a tool who cheated his way through school.