My hometown Nelson has a community radio station run by a crew of volunteers (Kootenay Co-op Radio). They offer a number of excellent programs, both music and spoken word shows.

I was asked to be a guest on a relatively new talk show called Stand and Deliver. The topic? Parenting young children of course!

Here’s the write-up from their Facebook page:

“Tonight on Stand and Deliver, we’ll meet and talk with parenting expert Judy Banfield to address the challenges that face parents of young children when it comes to raising kids. Raising young children in the age of Facebook and Google can be tough when they have access to so much parenting information that is conflicting. She’s a great speaker and pretty savvy around parenting, breastfeeding, education… so much more.”

Mike and Anthony were very curious, entertaining, and the hour just flew by. It was very encouraging to have them interview me. Neither of them has kids and they both learned a lot from our talk. Mike said, “I can assure you just from this hour you’ll learn some very valuable life training as a parent.”

Tune in and feel free to leave me some comments below.

“Do you see what I see?”

I asked this question as I was sitting with a number of new moms and their babies.

Some of the babies were 3 or 4 months old and there was one that was 6 months old.

It was obvious to me that there was a distinct difference in the older baby compared to the younger ones, yet the new moms couldn’t see it.

The distinction had to do with the way the 6-month old was sitting.

Would you believe that how a baby sits affects their readiness to eat solid food?

It’s true.

And would you also believe that, after being around countless new moms and babies over the years, that introducing a baby to solid foods can be so stressful to a new mom that it can make her feel inadequate?

This week on my podcast, I’ll share some simple yet supportive ideas to help you to introduce solid foods and not beat yourself up in the process.

Helpful links:

La Leche League

KellyMom.com of starting solids

Dr. Sears on starting solids

I’ve been around a lot of babies and children over the last 30 years.

And when it comes to describing what I’ve seen in their individual development, the word “fascinating” comes to my mind.

Why fascinating?

Because each and every one was individually unique in the way they were putting together their “own picture of the world.”

Yet there are countless books and websites that say, “this is what a 3-year-old does” or some other ideas about what a child “should” be doing by a certain age.

And in my experience, I’ve seen how that kind of information can undermine a mom and make her feel really insecure, especially if she compares her child to her friends’ other “normal” children.

Do you know someone who feels like that? Maybe you?

Not to worry because my podcast this week should help.

This week, I talk about why understanding your child’s individual differences is one of the most critical factors among many that affect child rearing and development.

I’ll also share with you one of the many tools I know that can really help parents understand their child and help themselves to not feel distraught over their child’s development.

The tool is understanding Dimensions of Temperament and the 9 Temperament Traits. (here is a list of the temperament traits)

(and in case you missed it, I also recap my podcast from last week)

Judy

PS: I’d love to hear from you. Comment below and let me know your thoughts and ideas about temperament and the podcast too.

When it comes to caring for a baby, I’m always amazed how moms are surprised that other moms are having the same experiences.

This past week I was the guest presenter at a Parents’ Support Group. They wanted me to talk about infant and toddler sleep (or wakefulness!), one of my favourite topics.

We talked about normal sleep patterns, the stress of expectations, peer and media pressure.

Sleep and the way it happens (or doesn’t happen) is one of those things that so many people have an opinion about.

A baby or toddler sleeps and wakes up and sleeps some more and wakes up and sleeps a bit more…. because…

This week, instead of writing yet another sleep-related blog, I thought to try something a bit different. So I recorded a podcast to tell you what we spoke about at the meeting instead.

Tune in and learn the real reasons your baby is keeping you up at night and what you can do to take care of yourself in the process. I also talk about feeling good and confident as a parent – one of my favourite topics.

Judy

PS: I’d love to hear from you. Comment below and let me know your thoughts and ideas about sleep, wakefulness, and the podcast too.

PPS: Here are 2 handouts I gave to the parents with positive steps you can take to support better sleep for your baby or toddler.

Night Weaning: 12 Alternatives for the All-Night Toddler Nurser

Ways to Get Your Baby to Sleep and Stay Asleep

When it comes to caring for a baby, I’m always amazed how moms are surprised that other moms are having the same experiences.

This past week I was the guest presenter at a Parents’ Support Group. They wanted me to talk about infant and toddler sleep (or wakefulness!), one of my favourite topics.

We talked about normal sleep patterns, the stress of expectations, peer and media pressure.

Sleep and the way it happens (or doesn’t happen) is one of those things that so many people have an opinion about.
Yet many of those opinions miss the mark.

A baby or toddler sleeps and wakes up and sleeps some more and wakes up and sleeps a bit more…. because…
That’s what’s normal and natural!

This week, instead of writing yet another sleep-related blog, I thought to try something a bit different. So I recorded a podcast to tell you what we spoke about at the meeting instead.

Tune in and learn the real reasons your baby is keeping you up at night and what you can do to take care of yourself in the process. I also talk about feeling good and confident as a parent – one of my favourite topics.

Judy

PS: I’d love to hear from you. Comment below and let me know your thoughts and ideas about sleep, wakefulness, and the podcast too.

PPS: Here are 2 handouts I gave to the parents with positive steps you can take to support better sleep for your baby or toddler.

Night Weaning: 12 Alternatives for the All-Night Toddler Nurser

Ways to Get Your Baby to Sleep and Stay Asleep

I’ve been around a lot of babies and children over the last 30 years.

And when it comes to describing what I’ve seen in their individual development, the word “fascinating” comes to my mind.

Why fascinating?

Because each and every one was individually unique in the way they were putting together their “own picture of the world.”

Yet there are countless books and websites that say, “this is what a 3-year-old does” or some other ideas about what a child “should” be doing by a certain age.

And in my experience, I’ve seen how that kind of information can undermine a mom and make her feel really insecure, especially if she compares her child to her friends’ other “normal” children.

Do you know someone who feels like that? Maybe you?

Not to worry because my podcast this week should help.

This week, I talk about why understanding your child’s individual differences is one of the most critical factors among many that affect child rearing and development.

I’ll also share with you one of the many tools I know that can really help parents understand their child and help themselves to not feel distraught over their child’s development.

The tool is understanding Dimensions of Temperament and the 9 Temperament Traits. (here is a list of the temperament traits)

(and in case you missed it, I also recap my podcast from last week)

Judy

PS: I’d love to hear from you. Comment below and let me know your thoughts and ideas about temperament and the podcast too.

“Do you see what I see?”

I asked this question as I was sitting with a number of new moms and their babies.

Some of the babies were 3 or 4 months old and there was one that was 6 months old.

It was obvious to me that there was a distinct difference in the older baby compared to the younger ones, yet the new moms couldn’t see it.

The distinction had to do with the way the 6-month old was sitting.

Would you believe that how a baby sits affects their readiness to eat solid food?

It’s true.

And would you also believe that, after being around countless new moms and babies over the years, that introducing a baby to solid foods can be so stressful to a new mom that it can make her feel inadequate?

This week on my podcast, I’ll share some simple yet supportive ideas to help you to introduce solid foods and not beat yourself up in the process.

Helpful links:

La Leche League

KellyMom.com of starting solids

Dr. Sears on starting solids

My hometown Nelson has a community radio station run by a crew of volunteers (Kootenay Co-op Radio). They offer a number of excellent programs, both music and spoken word shows.

I was asked to be a guest on a relatively new talk show called Stand and Deliver. The topic? Parenting young children of course!

Here’s the write-up from their Facebook page:

“Tonight on Stand and Deliver, we’ll meet and talk with parenting expert Judy Banfield to address the challenges that face parents of young children when it comes to raising kids. Raising young children in the age of Facebook and Google can be tough when they have access to so much parenting information that is conflicting. She’s a great speaker and pretty savvy around parenting, breastfeeding, education… so much more.”

Mike and Anthony were very curious, entertaining, and the hour just flew by. It was very encouraging to have them interview me. Neither of them has kids and they both learned a lot from our talk. Mike said, “I can assure you just from this hour you’ll learn some very valuable life training as a parent.”

Tune in and feel free to leave me some comments below.

What would you do if you lost your smartphone?

Scary thought isn’t it?

Up until a few years ago, the word “iPhone” was a tiny part of our language.

And the word itself certainly was not part of anything to do with being a mother or a parent of young children.

Yet today, smartphones are a pervasive bit of everyday technology owned by virtually all of the young moms (and parents, caregivers or grandparents) I meet. Even I have an iPhone.

In the short time that smartphones and other similar devices like iPads or tablets have been in existence, I’ve seen how they have transformed from a high-tech marvel to a babysitting device.

It’s easy to understand why. They’re fascinating for little kids and completely mesmerizing.

Put an iPad in the hands of a 3-year old and they intuitively know how to make it work. Put a texting device in the hands of an 8-year old and they are right at home.

On the surface, this ease that kids have with smartphones etc seems really cool.

But as a long-time child educator, I’m beginning to see how for kids, fascination with these devices isn’t healthy.

And as a parent coach, I’m beginning to see how these devices are negatively impacting relationships parents are having with their children.

For parents and kids alike,  smartphones etc interfere with their ability to express themselves to each other.

This week on my podcast, I talk about how this technology is negatively impacting parents’ relationships with their children and consequently negatively impacting their children’s development.

More info:

In my podcast I talk about this interview on CBC’s the Current with Sherry Turkle:
Smartphones hurt our face-to-face relationships

Here’s a followup to the CBC interview above (via The Current):
Toronto teacher blames smartphones for her badly-behaved students

From time to time I am asked to give presentations to new parents. I love meeting new parents and helping to answer their questions.

This week, I have been asked by a local parent support group to talk about Attachment Parenting.

I decided to make it the focus of my blog post this week and record a podcast for you on the subject.

Attachment Parenting is a subject of much confusion for parents and I wanted to explain what it is and to help you answer the question – is Attachment Parenting right for you and your baby.

(Below is more information that I refer to in the podcast via Attachment Parenting International.)

Attachment Parenting is an approach to childrearing that promotes a secure attachment bond between parents and their children. Attachment is a scientific term for the emotional bond in a relationship. The attachment quality that forms between parents and children, learned from the relational patterns with caregivers from birth on, correlates with how a child perceives – and ultimately is able to experience – relationships. Attachment quality is correlated with lifelong effects and often much more profound an impact than people understand. A person with a secure attachment is generally able to respond to stress in healthy ways and establish more meaningful and close relationships more often; a person with an insecure attachment style may be more susceptible to stress and less healthy relationships. A greater number of insecurely attached individuals are at risk for more serious mental health concerns such as depression and anxiety.

How parents develop a secure attachment with their child lies in the parent’s ability to fulfill that child’s need for trust, empathy, and affection by providing consistent, loving, and responsive care. By demonstrating healthy and positive relationship skills, the parent Provides critical emotional scaffolding for the child to learn essential self-regulatory skills.

Attachment Parenting International’s Eight Principles of Parenting are designed to give parents the science-backed “tools” – valuable, practical insights for everyday parenting – that they can use to apply the concept behind Attachment Parenting. These tools guide parents as they incorporate attachment into their individual parenting styles:

1. Prepare for Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Parenting — The overarching message within this principle is the importance of parents to research their decisions regarding pregnancy care, childbirth choices, and parenting styles; childbirth without the use of interventions shows the best start to the parent-infant bond. However, there are ways to modify the initial bonding experience for mothers who do encounter complications.