jwz

Dear Lazyweb,

How do I do an Apache rewrite but also have it show up in error_log? E.g. the following has the side effect that it is not logged, making it unavailable to fail2ban:

RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d RewriteRule ^.*$ - [GONE,LAST]

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"Bottles are $5, or there's a fountain right over there."

Unión del Barrio:

Community patrol members are specifically trained to look out for signs of undercover law enforcement vehicles -- usually U.S.-manufactured vehicles such as Dodge Durangos, Ford Explorers, and Chevy Impalas with dark-tinted windows that stand out from others in the neighborhood. Trucks and SUVs with no license plates and with lights on the grill and visor are other hallmarks that volunteers look out for.

"There's always an agent inside," Prado said, scanning the streets for suspicious vehicles. "They usually operate in pairs, sometimes you can also see in the backseat, there's like a cell or detention cage." [...]

"Sometimes we'll just ask, 'Are you law enforcement?" he said. "They'll usually just say federal agent. It does give us an indicator that it's some kind of law enforcement. More often than not, we make the assessment to confirm that there is some kind of federal law enforcement, and we'll announce it to the community." [...]

Prado says that the concept of the community-level self-defense was inspired by the Black Panther Party, which formed similar neighborhood patrols to defend their neighborhoods from police terror in the 1960s.

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BOSTON:

"I tried my best to make the augments that Mr. Musk requested, but what he was asking for was simply not realistic based on the state of his original member -- you try surgically transforming wet hamburger in a baby sock into the Washington Monument," said Dr. Kaminski. "Then he insisted on being awake during the procedure so he could micromanage the implant process, and when I told him that if we attached any more of the 'cyber-enhancements' he brought with him the penile structure would collapse on itself like a pubic blackhole. Then when it fell apart like all of his other ideas, he went on X and called me a pedophile."

Following the botched surgery, Musk reportedly turned to fertility expert Dr. John Marley in his quest to impregnate a small army of female employees.

"At first I was honored that Mr. Musk chose me to support his quest to staff the federal government entirely with his offspring, but I didn't realize how challenging the process would be -- it was kind of like milking an earthworm but with much, much more sobbing," said Dr. Marley. "And then he started bringing in a phrenology chart and calipers and demanded I discard any sperm absent of his 'desired caucasoid features.' I finally told him to find a different fertility doctor after he asked if it was possible to load a blowgun dart with his sperm to impregnate women from afar."

Slate:

One of the few things they can take solace in is fantasizing about Musk's permanently maimed penis. We had a version of this during Trump's first term, when Stormy Daniels described the man's member as a gross-looking mushroom. [...]

The polarization of capital has never been more apparent than in 2025. The oligarchy is at the control panel. We all live in hell. And yet, the richest man in the world still can't buy a bigger penis without risking "fluid-filled pus bubbles." Poetic justice. Maybe everything is going to be OK after all.

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Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

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So I guess we're reaching the point where if you want to remain vaccinated against COVID, you'll have to figure out how to buy an illegal import from this "dark web" I've been hearing so much about.

Or maybe go down to one of our famed "Open Air Drug Markets" and buy it from a.... Blade Runner.

From Violet's roundup:

Yesterday RFK Jr.'s HHS ordered the lab studying deadly infectious diseases, including Ebola, to stop research indefinitely. RFK Jr.'s message to parents of newborns considering vaccination was "Do your own research." Tuberculosis is now rising in Florida; Miami Herald reports TB cases rose above pre-Covid levels in 2023 and climbed 8% higher in 2024.

FDA head and antivaxer Dr. Marty Makary, who blocked Novavax approval and forced the company into an unnecessary extra trial, told CBS News the FDA may not approve the next Covid boosters. Makary falsely stated there is not enough data showing Covid vaccines work, also inaccurately claiming there is "broad population immunity." A PR flack from RFK Jr's HHS told press, "The Covid-19 pandemic is over, and HHS will no longer waste billions of taxpayer dollars responding to a non-existent pandemic that Americans moved on from years ago."

RFK Jr. rejects cornerstone of health science: Germ theory:

While it's certainly possible that worm remnants could impair brain function, it remains unknown if the worm is to blame for Kennedy's cognitive oddities. For one thing, he was also diagnosed with mercury poisoning, which can cause brain damage, too. As prominent infectious disease expert Anthony Fauci said last June in a conversation with political analyst David Axelrod: "I don't know what's going on in [Kennedy's] head, but it's not good."

The trouble is that now that Kennedy is the country's top health official, his warped ideas are contributing to the rise of a dystopian reality. Federal health agencies are spiraling into chaos, and critical public health services for Americans have been brutally slashed, dismantled, or knee-capped -- from infectious disease responses, the lead poisoning team, and Meals on Wheels to maternal health programs and anti-smoking initiatives, just to name a few. The health of the nation is at stake; the struggle to understand what goes on in Kennedy's head is vital.

While we may never have definitive answers on his cognitive situation, one thing is plain: Kennedy's thoughts and actions make a lot more sense when you realize he doesn't believe in a foundational scientific principle: germ theory.

John Oliver did a whole show about Bobby Brainworms and it's terrifying.

A classic from last year, in case you missed it: RFK Jr. Was My Drug Dealer.

He poured out a line for me to sample, and handed me an inch-and-a-half length of plastic drinking straw. I snorted. We chatted for a minute. I paid him, I believe, $40 in cash. It was a lot of money, the equivalent of $300 today. But cocaine bought from a Kennedy accompanied by a Kennedy brother -- the moment of glamour seemed worth it.

Back in my dorm room 10 minutes later, I got a phone call. "You took my straw!"

Sean Casten:

Putting a former heroin addict with a brain worm who eats road kill and drinks raw milk in charge of scientific research will prove to be a massively deadly mistake.

"RFK Jr. will order placebo testing for new vaccines, alarming health experts."
"RFK Jr. to end 'Godsend' Narcan program that helped reduce overdose deaths despite his past heroin addiction".

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"Industrial-Grade Juicing for Every Need"

The video of him building this thing was kind of interminable, and he lost me when he started ranting about fluoride conspiracies, but this is some commitment to a bit...

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XScreenSaver 6.10 is out now, including iOS and Android.

This is the first Android release not to be found in in the Google "Play" [sic] Store, due to the recent unpleasantness. So you'll have to install the APK by hand, which is no hardship of any kind.

Four new hacks this time, just one by me: Dumpster Fire, Hopf Fibration, Platonic Folding and Klondike.

Dumpster Fire is, obviously, why I was asking for fire sim code last week, for which The Lazyweb was singularly unhelpful. But I worked it out.

The thing that I spent the most time on in this release was... writing a new vt100 emulator from scratch. I had a thing that I wanted to do while making the intermission video for our screening of TRON at DNA Lounge a few months ago, and the existing emulator wasn't up to the task. So I started over. There may not be much utility to be found in a vt100 emulator built into the Apple ][ and Phosophor screen savers, but should the need arise, this one is rock solid. It even passes Thomas Dickey's "vttest" stress tester (to the extent that Apple ][ and Phosphor are capable of implementing those features). It's in hacks/ansi-tty.c should you have use for such a thing.

It has been 10 months since the last XScreenSaver release, which looks to have been the longest I've gone between releases... ever. What can I say, I haven't been feeling to inspired to write new ones lately, and I just don't get many submissions from outsiders these days. I suppose most people scratching their generative art / demoscene itch these days don't write C, they use Processing or Shadertoy, and the barrier to entry in XScreenSaver is significantly higher than that.

Perhaps my life would be easiser if I would stop clinging to the idea that XScreenSaver must support systems that are OpenGL but not necessarily GLES. But every time I ponder what that might break I just get angry all over again and go do something else.

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