Kids Under Construction

Here we are in our new normal of being at home almost 24/7. Parents and kids have been forced to work together to develop cooperation, boundaries and create a new kind of social life that now likely exists on social media or video conferencing platforms. I wanted to sit down and talk to a kid and get his take on it. I had the pleasure of welcoming Cameron J. Wright, a 14-year-old musician and working actor who appears on the Netflix sitcom, “Family Reunion.” Cameron shares his unique experience of social distancing under the shelter in place orders of COVID-19 and how his life has drastically changed . Cameron shares his anxiety reducing techniques and sheds light on how kids and people of any age can use this unprecedented pause on life to find a passion and use it to create happiness. How his passion for music led him to being discovered on Instagram by Nick Cannon and chosen to be a member of his upcoming boy band creation, Ncredible Crazy Kids. As a homeschooled kid himself, Cameron reveals how kids can adjust, and how they can focus on their school work and not fall behind. Cameron’s mom, Salesha joins the conversation to discuss the challenges she faces as a single mom homebound with her teenaged son and how she’s coping with the anxiety she and Cameron both share from their new life of being constantly together and separated from their close-knit family. Salesha reveals how communication is key to managing feelings and helping Cameron to avoid negativity and understand what’s really going on in the world. One thing I took from my conversation with Cameron and Salesha is that we are all in this together and we will get through this. We will learn and grow from this unique and oddly transformative experience.

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Now that we’ve settled into our stay in place orders due to COVID-19 or Coronavirus, how can we turn the boredom, social disconnection and anxiety our kids are experiencing into something from which they can emerge stronger and more resilient? Did you know self-compassion is one of the many ways to achieve a greater sense of resilience? It’s time for parents, kids and families to take the current situation we’re in and upend it! Let’s build resilience in our kids, in ourselves as parents and within the whole family! I’m so happy to be joined today by two amazing guests at the top of their field, who are also moms; First, my friend and colleague, Lisa Sugarman, an author, radio talkshow host and columnist of the nationally syndicated opinion column, “It Is What It Is” and the the author of, "How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids And Be Okay With It: Real Tips And Strategies For Parents Of Today’s Gen Z Kids". Lisa defines resilience as being able to get up after falling down regardless of what’s going on around you and says whether it’s helicopter parenting, bulldozer parenting or lawnmower parenting, they all create a deterrent to building resilience in our kids. But there is so much parents can do to build a resilient being. Life is not a straight line and we are not perfect and that should be the overarching message parents should be sending to their children. Whether they didn't ace the test, didn’t make the team or are having a bad week in school, it’s the attitude they adopt as they navigate through these difficult situations that is important. And when they master that, the sky’s the limit! Then, Leilani Sinclair, an associate marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles, and in her practice she sees teens, couples and families to help navigate divorce, family conflict and custody disputes. Leilani says that in order for a child to develop the skills they need to grow into adulthood, they need to have a stable adult in their lives to establish trust through consistency. When there’s a lack of trust, a child isn’t wiring their brain for connection, they’re wiring it for protection. We can’t build resilience in our kids if they don’t connect with us, trust us and have a stable environment at the core of their development. I hope you’ll gain a sense of empowerment and self-compassion as a parent after listening to today’s episode!

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Now that we’re weeks into the Coronavirus or COVID-19 crisis, most of the country is under strict stay in place orders. Co-parents are entering uncharted territory and so many new challenges have arisen they’ve never had to deal with before, creating tense situations and bitter stand-offs. Parents have serious questions, like “I’m under a strict stay in place order, how can I visit with my child?” “I don’t live near my child’s mother, how can I visit? “If I can’t have visitation, why do I have to pay child support?” There are other serious questions about children in homes with domestic violence; who can protect them? With courthouses shut down for most of the country, who enforces the orders these families are under that are meant to have the children’s welfare as the paramount concern? This is why I’m so happy and honored to have two legal experts at the forefront of this work. Hollywood powerhouse divorce attorney, Laura Wasser and past presiding judge of Riverside County, Sherrill Ellsworth join me today and together the three of us take on the questions parents have about what to do in their situation under the unique and constraining conditions of the world during Coronavirus. We have solid advice and great takeaway for parents who are struggling during this trying time. I know you’ll walk away with hope and a peaceful, constructive solution that benefits parents, kids and entire families.

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As we all settle in to another week of the continuing spread of the coronavirus or COVID-19, we come to the realization that we might be homebound even longer than we had anticipated. Now more than ever, we need tools and coping strategies as parents and families to endure the unchartered waters we are in today. If you’re the parent of a middle schooler, you know more than anyone that a kid this age is fraught with uncertainty, indecision and anxiety. How do they navigate friendships? What do they want to be? What do they stand for? This phase of development can get tricky! With executive function not fully developed until they're in their 20’s, they’re far from being able to analyze situations and make the right decisions, yet there is so much happening in their brains! More and more middle school kids are expressing feelings of depression, anxiety and even suicide. We’ve got to help them. But how do we help a kid who can seem annoyed just by our very presence? What do you do when arguing and rebellion is their knee-jerk reaction? I’m so happy and honored to have Dr. Judy Ho here to impart her wisdom and share her experience on how we can effectively communicate with our kids about navigating peer pressure and help them make the right decisions. Dr. Judy has solutions on how we can help our kids exit a difficult situation and avoid the dangers of things like vaping and sexting. Dr. Judy shares her two go-to techniques of effective communication and re-framing of perspective to avoid negative thinking and finding a way to make bad thoughts “workable” for both parent and child. Dr. Judy and I really connected on utilizing mindfulness and meditation as a family to clear our minds and create a feeling of serenity and of being grounded. I actually do this at home with my boys. Dr. Judy leads us on one of her favorite mindful meditations she calls, “clouds in the sky” Did you know kids who practice mindfulness and meditation report significantly lower levels of depression and anxiety? It even helps them score higher on tests! My hope is to offer you valuable information and tools you can use to calmly, wisely and lovingly guide your middle school kids through this especially difficult time. 

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As the Coronavirus or COVID-19, continues to spread, we wake up everyday to more scary headlines, empty store shelves, school closures and new rules for social distancing. With millions of students now joining their parents at home, Mom, Dad and sometimes both are forced to become educators virtually overnight. Parents are really feeling the brunt of this crisis and I want to help them.

I’m so excited about my first guest! He’s a 17-year elementary school teacher with seemingly endless creativity and passion for education, Kevin Butler. Together Kevin and I offer our listeners tangible information and resources for parents to become effective and creative teachers to their kids. How long should kids be learning every day? What about socializing and playtime? How much tech is too much? Parents aren’t going to have all the answers and may feel defeated or overwhelmed. These are tough times for kids, parents, families and the world, but I truly see this crisis as an opportunity for all of us to rise to the occasion and adopt a positive mindset, create calm and contribute to our community so that we can all thrive together! I hope after listening to my conversation with Kevin you are empowered and inspired to take on this new role as parent/teacher with confidence!

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Kids Under Construction - Coming Soon!

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