Alex and Rob cast an irreverent eye over local news from their respective home towns.

Listeners can submit stories from their local area to:[email protected]

Stories this week include:

• Cheap sex toy causes titillation among customers.
• Pantomime cow cull begins in Stroud.
• Pensioner knocked sparko by apologetic attacker.
• Council defends new revenue stream through narcotics grown in city centre flowerpots.

Also revealed: We forget to celebrate.